CUTS

Re edited for paragraph breaks.

A Serial Experiments Lain fan fiction.

Written by Kaori.

Director's note: Don't ask me if I was high while making this, I wasn't. I guess I was in one of those Johnny moments. I like this story; I guess I was in a Johnny moment because Lain is acting a lot like Johnny in this story. If you are confused about who Johnny is, I'm talking about the comic 'Johnny the Homicidal Maniac' made by Jhonen Vasquez. This is a rather dark fic; so if you want something lighthearted, go back now. This story contains insanity, suicide, and is not suitable for young children. Another thing, if you have not seen ANY of the series 'Serial Experiments Lain' you probably won't understand this fan fiction. Another note; I listened to Blue Monday by Orgy on repeat while writing this, shows, huh? Maybe I should rename the story Blue Monday, or Stitches. The song Blue Monday makes me think of Lain and Johnny.

"Why does everyone hate me so much? Since Alice left nobody likes me. I miss her so much." Alice had moved away a couple months ago, and with her Lain's hopes for a future. Lain was more depressed than ever. Her family would wonder about the blood in the sink, or on the floor, but never confronted Lain about it. Her family also didn't ask about the new voices they would hear her talking to. And Lain didn't plan to tell them. She thought it best to keep her recent insanity to herself. Once her sister did ask about the voices. "They are friends, on the wired." It was a lie. In fact, it seemed that, on those rare occasions when she did talk, it was always a lie. The voices were really coming from the stuffed animals.

"No sanctuary. No sanctuary. There is no place for you. You have nowhere to go. Your life is not real. Life is not real."

The voices would go on through the night. They ignored her weeping. They only silenced to watch Lain dig the razor in her arm. She was doing it once or twice a day now. She would wear long sleeves to cover it up. When she went to CYBERIA she would just wear a lot of jewelry. The wired provided no help. She found others, like her. Yet, she didn't understand them. She knew she should, they were going through the same thing. Then, the voices would start.

"No sanctuary. No sanctuary. There is no place for you. You have nowhere to go. Your life is not real. Life is not real." Then Lain would find the razor.

"I'm sick. I need help." She told herself one day. "There is no help. There is no reality. You are only a figment." The voices were louder than the day before. They got louder every day. "If I'm a figment, then so are you. You are my figment. You are a figment of a figment." She told them.

"No, we are real. You are our figment. The world is our figment." Lain was disgusted. "For stuffed animals, you certainly are full of yourselves."

"No, we are filled with the truth. You are the one full of yourself."

"You want me to get the razor and cut myself, don't you?" Lain asked, already holding the razor. "Yes." They replied. She walked to the windowsill. She held her arm over a stuffed dog and dug the razor in her wrist, letting the blood drip on it. "If I'm a figment, why do I bleed? How do I cry if I'm a figment. Tell me if you're so great, so real." She held her hand under the bleeding wrist until it was full of blood. She pressed the bloody hand on a bears face.

"You see this? Feel it? MY blood. If I'm a figment why do I..."

"Because we let you." A voice cut in. Except, it was behind her. She turned around. Wires, a wall, and a door, nothing else. She spun around to the animals again. "How the Hell did you do that?" She would have screamed it if her sister wasn't sleeping in the next room.

"No sanctuary." A voice said in her left ear. "No sanctuary." Another said in her right ear. "There is no place for you." She could feel breath; it was so close to her face. "Quit it." She whimpered. "You have no where to go." This time it was right behind her. She grabbed a stuffed bunny. "Stop it, before I silence you for good." The bunny laughed. This time the voice came from the bunny itself.

"There is no way to silence me, or the others. We silence ourselves, not you. You are a mere figment."

"You have nowhere to go."

The voices started again. This time the voices were all around Lain. Lain walked out of the room, dropping the bunny and leaving a trail of blood as she went.

"Your life is not real. Life is not real. You are our figment."

Lain kept walking to her destination. The she reached it.

A gun, lying on the nightstand next to fathers side of the bed. She went back to her room. She dropped to her knees in front of the widow with the animals. The voices repeated themselves on a continuous loop. Lain started doing the same.

"My life is mine. My life is mine. My life is mine. My life is mine." She lifted the gun to her temple. "I end it on my own will."

BAM.