Yin And Yang


This diary belongs to Syaoran Li, youngest member of the Li Clan of Hong Kong.

Saturday 27th May 1998

Mother left for Beijing very early this morning. My great uncle Mu Bai has died; she has to go to the funeral, and sort out his affairs. He was one of the best martial artists in China. I asked to go but me and my sisters are to stay at home. I would have liked to see Beijing, but I didn't argue. I went and trained for hours instead; by the evening I was very tired, so I decided to sit on the balcony and find a book to read. I'm in the attic now. There are lots of books kept here, some on shelves, some in boxes and chests, some heaped up in piles. They're fascinating. I love books, I love the knowledge and wisdom they hold. I especially love old books. And there are so many here; I never found one to sit down properly and read, there were too many to choose from.

I found this book in a chest tucked away in the furthest corner. It's leather-bound in blue and purple and the edges of the paper are gold-leafed, but faded. It had no title so I opened it, and all it had was blank pages. A blank book. But I think it's a diary, because there are faint dates in the front. They're from very long ago. The earliest is June, 1542. I can't believe I am holding something so old. It feels magical, somehow, I don't know – like there's some kind of powerful calm in the pages. I've thought about keeping a diary for a while, and this seemed to be a perfect coincidence. I feel almost unworthy of using it; I hope it's alright for me to write in it.

I assure you, you are quite welcome.

Hello?

Who- who are you?

My name is Klao. This is my diary. And you must be Syaoran Li – I'm very pleased to meet you.

How do you know my name?

You wrote it at the top of the page, Syaoran. I'm very glad you came by my diary, it's been quite lonely here on my own for so long.

But… But I mean… what are you? Are you a person? Are you under a spell? An enchantment?

Well, I'm not exactly a person, per se. I used to be. But yes, I am definitely enchanted.

Are you… are you trapped?

Goodness no. This is an enchanted diary. I used to write in here, long ago, and I put spells on the book as I wrote in it to keep my memories alive.

You're a magician, then! I didn't know magic could do… well… this kind of thing!

Magic can do all sorts of things. But I thought you would have known that – magic has, after all, been part of the Li Clan for time out of mind.

You know of my family?

Of course. I knew many members of the Li Clan very well indeed. I am delighted that the person to at last come across me is the youngest present member himself. How old are you, Syaoran?

My tenth birthday was last November. I… well, if you don't mind my asking… are you – were you – or are you, I'm not sure – a man or a woman?

A man.

Thank you, Sir. I wasn't sure. I have never heard your name before.

You don't need to call me Sir, Syaoran. Just Klao is fine. You seem to be a very nice and well-mannered boy.

Thank you. Mother is very strict about courtesy. About obedience, too. I really wanted to go to Beijing, but I would never argue with her.

I'm very sorry about your great uncle.

That's alright. I've never even seen him. I would have liked to, though; he was a famous martial artist. I train hard, every day, but I'll never be as famous as he was.

I'm sure that if you're as dedicated as you sound, you'll become very famous indeed.

It's not really fame that I want. Respect, maybe. I'm strong already, I know, much more than other boys my age. Not that I know many. I spend all my time training and learning, I don't really have time for friends. I want more than anything to be worthy of my family and uphold our pride.

That's very noble of you. You mentioned that you like books. Are you as clever as you are strong?

Well, I study my subjects very hard, and I get good marks in school. Sometimes, though… sometimes I worry about my school reports, when I take them home to Mother. She expects me to do very well.

If you do your best, that's all anyone can ask for. What kind of books do you like, Syaoran?

Oh, any kind! I love old books. Last week I read a book of essays on magical tactics I found here in the attic, from a hundred years ago, written by one of my great great grandfathers. I like my school books, too. Especially history.

What about storybooks? Fiction?

Storybooks? I don't read storybooks. That's the kind of thing Mei Ling reads. She was reading Sleeping Beauty the other day. Fairytales.

Who's Mei Ling?

Oh, she's my cousin. She has no magical lineage, but she's not a bad martial artist, I suppose. But she's so noisy, and, well… annoying. I don't get on with girls very much. Mei Ling's always following me. She never leaves me alone, even if I tell her to. And to make things worse, she… well, my family have…

What? What have your family done?

Well, they… Oh, it's stupid. We're betrothed, Mei Ling and I. She started it, I don't know how it became official. I don't want to marry anyone, least of all her.

I'm sure she's not that bad. And I expect you'll find you want to marry one day, Syaoran.

Maybe. I wouldn't want to Li Clan to die out with me. But not Mei Ling. I'd want the girl I married to be calm, focused, strong-willed… oh, why am I talking about marrying? Mei Ling is irritating. She didn't want me to go to Beijing either.

It sounds like she likes you.

I don't know. I don't see why; I don't speak to her much. She-

Yes?

Syaoran? Are you still there?

Yes…

What's the matter?

Klao? I just – I just thought – do you – you wouldn't… tell anyone what I've written in here, would you? I mean, can you?

I can speak to anyone who writes in this book. But even if I had the chance, Syaoran, I wouldn't. I know how to keep secrets.

Well… all right. I trust you. The magic I can feel from this book is very calm, but very powerful. You must have been a great sorcerer.

Thank you. But greatness doesn't always come through power; remember that.

I will. That sounds like good advice. Klao? Are you really sure you don't mind me writing in here?

Of course I don't mind! Why should I go through all the trouble of preserving my memories so carefully, if there was no-one to pass them on to?

That's true. But I can't… just use you as a diary. It feels disrespectful.

It doesn't feel disrespectful to me. But if it makes you feel uncomfortable, why don't you just think of me as a person you can come and talk to when you need help, or advice, or just to fill me in on what's happening? I'm a bit out of date with current affairs, I'm afraid.

Of course! I didn't think of that! When did you write in here?

Well, going by the date you wrote at the top, I would say it was about three hundred and fifty, maybe four hundred years ago. But that was only when I started writing in it.

That's amazing! And you don't know about anything that's happened since?

Well, no, that's not true. Some things I do know, through one way or another. But if you could keep me informed, Syaoran, about what's happening both in your life and in the world, I would appreciate it more than you'll know.

You've convinced me. I will write in here.

I'm very glad.

I'm not sure it would be right to leave you alone again, now I've found you. It must have been very lonely, in here all alone, for so long.

You're more compassionate than you let on, Syaoran.

Well. I don't know. I- oh no, I can hear Shu calling me.

Shu?

My sister. I've got four; Shao, Chun, Cho and Shu. Cho and Shu are twins. They're all older than me. I'd better go and see what she wants.

Klao! A phone call from Mother. Something important's happened. I don't know exactly what, but her voice was strange; quiet and almost excited. She said that she's had news from Beijing, news that concerns us all. Something's happening. I can feel it.

Didn't she tell you anything else?

No. She doesn't really speak on the phone much. She's staying for two more days until the funeral is over and the great uncle's will is read and carried out. Then she's flying home, I suppose to tell us what this 'news' is.

How mysterious. Two more days. Do you miss her when she goes away?

Mother? I… don't know. I don't miss her, not really. I don't see her a lot anyway. And when I do, she's very quiet and formal. I spend most of my time with Wei and my sisters, and other people who live in and near the house, like Mei Ling.

Who's Wei?

Wai is my guardian. He trains Mei Ling and I, does cooking, a bit of housekeeping. I'm not sure how old he is. He's been around for as long as I remember, but he's not family. I once asked Mother why Wei came to stay with us, but she just said he did her a great courtesy. I'm not sure what that means. I don't know anything else about him, really, other than that he's very kind and patient.

Oh- speak of the devil! Wei's just come up to tell me supper's ready. I'd better go.

Well, It was a pleasure to meet you, Syaoran. Will you write in again soon?

Of course! I'll come and see you as often as I can. I'm so glad I found you, Klao. I'm still not sure I can believe it. I expected to find another book of essays in the attic, not a new friend! If I can call you that; after all, I'm only a boy, and you're a sorcerer.

I'm delighted that you think of me as a friend. Go on, your supper will be cold. Don't make Wei wait.

Ok. Goodbye, Klao! I'll write again soon!

Goodbye, Syaoran.

Sunday 28th May, 1998

Klao?

Hello, Syaoran! How are you today?

You are there! I was beginning to think I'd imagined the whole thing.

Can't you see the writing from yesterday?

Well, yes, but… I was being silly. It's a bit unbelievable, anyway.

I suppose it is, even to someone who's familiar with magic.

Well, how many enchanted diaries can there be in the world? Not many, I shouldn't think!

I don't know of anyone else who ever enchanted a diary, although it is possible there are some.

Really?

It's possible. How is your mother? Have you heard anything more from her?

Not a word. I'm burning up with curiosity. What is this news she's bringing us? Why is it so important? I never heard Mother like that before, her voice almost trembled. She's always calm. It must be something really incredible.

How exciting! How have you been keeping yourself occupied?

Training. I trained harder than ever today. Even Wai was impressed. I worked for hours, until he told me to stop and rest. Mei Ling worked with me for a while, but then she got tired and stopped, complaining that her feet were hurting. Then she sat on the steps and watched me for another hour. I wish she wouldn't; it's difficult to concentrate with someone staring at you all the time.

You mentioned before that Mei Ling is a good martial artist…?

Yes. Well, she is, I suppose. But in my opinion she's too unfocused. She's never calm, never quiet. She's a very firey person, she can't control herself properly.

Sometimes that can be an asset, and give your technique an edge of vividness that overthrows your opponent.

You think so?

At times, yes, very much so. Have you ever fought against her?

Not often, but when I have, we've usually ended up in a deadlock. We did that last week. An hour of Tai Chi, and then we fought Kung Fu. She's fast; very fast. And strong. But I get the feeling she doesn't hit as hard as hard as she's capable of.

I see. And do you hit as hard as you're capable of?

Well… no. I don't. I don't know why. I know she'd block it, but… I don't like hurting her. People. I don't like hurting people.

That's very thoughtful of you, Syaoran.

That's got nothing to do with it. I just- oh, anyway. It's Monday tomorrow, so I'll be at school. That'll keep me busy until Tuesday morning, when Mother comes home. Oh, no! I just remembered, with all the training I've been doing, I haven't finished any of my homework!

Oh dear. Have you got a lot?

Not very much. But I'll have to rush to get it done in time. It's mostly Maths; I don't mind that, I like Maths. This might sound strange, but it's almost like Tai Chi for the mind; calm concentration, going steadily through the motions, coming out completed and fulfilled.

A very good analysis. Probably good for you to do after all that training, too.

Why's that?

Well, you've tired your body out today, but not your mind. That makes you unbalanced, and when you try to go to sleep tonight, your body will be exhausted but your mind will still be racing, unable to rest. So tire your mind out too, and you'll have the perfect night's sleep.

I didn't realise that. I'll remember it and try to keep myself balanced in the future. Thanks, Klao.

Don't mention it. You'll find it useful.

I'd better go and get on with it. I'll write again after school. Bye!

See you tomorrow, Syaoran.

Monday 29th May, 1998

Hi, Klao.

Hello, Syaoran. Have you had a good day?

Not bad. I like being at school. I like learning things. I like our teacher, too; Miss La Tien.

Miss La Tien. What a pretty name. What's she like?

Young. The youngest of all the teachers. And very kind, but firm. People don't misbehave in her class because we all like her. She seems to understand us, and teach us all as different people, not just a single class. The girls are always asking to brush her hair.

Brush her hair?

Silly, isn't it? That's girls for you. I suppose she has got nice hair, very long and straight and black, but still. Mei Ling loves her. Miss La Tien is the only teacher who can keep her interested for more than five minutes.

And how is dear Mei Ling?

Impatient, Loud, easily distracted, piercing, tantrum-prone. As always. She's been pestering me even more than usual today. "Syaoran, I made you lunch! Syaoran, can you help me with this sum? Do you want to share this computer with me? Syaoran, wait for me, we can walk home together!" It's driving me up the wall. In the end I snapped at her to leave me alone, and she went quiet and walked off.

Perhaps you ought to see if she's alright, Syaoran. I can tell you get a bit impatient with her, but you know she doesn't mean to bother you. She might be a little hurt.

Maybe. I… I really didn't mean to snap at her, you know. I do feel sort of bad. She just gets on my nerves sometimes, that's all.

Maybe you could go and find her, and tell her you didn't mean to sound so sharp.

Yes. I think I will. You know, just tell her I didn't mean to shout, that's all. That she just annoys me a little bit sometimes.

Well, perhaps leave out that last part.

Ok. Alright, I'll go and find her. I'll be back in a-

Can you believe it!

Syaoran? What happened?

She just crept right up behind me, and put her hands over my eyes, singing "Guess who, Syaoran!"

Good Grief. Must have been a bit of a shock.

A bit! I yelled out and slammed you shut-

I noticed.

I'm so sorry! Can you feel things like that?

Well, I can tell, yes. But it doesn't hurt, so don't worry. Go on.

I'm sorry. I'll try not to do it again. Well, I yelled and slammed you shut and said "Mei Ling! Don't do that!"

She skipped around and knelt in front of me, saying "What's that you were writing in?"

"Nothing."

"Doesn't look like nothing to me! Let me see!" And she tried to grab you.

She tried to grab me. That hasn't happened in a while.

I lost my temper. I know I shouldn't have. I shouted "Get off, Mei Ling!", pulled you away and stood up.

She looked hurt and said, "Why do you always shout at me? I only wanted to see what you were writing."

I was really angry. "Well, you should respect people's privacy! And I wouldn't shout at you if you didn't get at me so much!"

Then she got angry too. "You're so mean, Syaoran, you're mean to me all the time! Why can't you just be nice? I'm sorry if you were writing something private, but you don't have to shout!" Then she started to cry.

Oh dear.

It gets worse. Wai must have heard us, because he came out of the house with Shu and Cho. Of course Shu and Cho went straight to Mei Ling and started cooing over her and glaring at me. Then they took her inside. Wai sat on the step next to me and said, "What happened, Syaoran?"

"We just had an argument. She tried to take my book and I got angry."

"She didn't mean to upset you. You have too little patience with her."

Too little patience. You know, I never thought of it before. I've always called Mei Ling impatient and unfocused, but when it comes to her, I'm no better. It shocked me a bit when I realised that.

So now I'm sitting outside on the step again, Wai's gone inside, and Shu and Cho are with Mei Ling in her room. So much for finding her and apologising for snapping at her at school today.

It does sound like a bit of a mess. Perhaps Wai is right; maybe it would help if you tried putting yourself in Mei Ling's place when you start to feel annoyed with her? I'm sure most of the time she only wants to spend time with you.

Well… you might be right. I don't know why she wants to spend time with me. But she's always coming over to see what I'm doing or where I'm going or how I am… she was just curious about what I was writing. I hope she's not too upset. There's a sort of hollow feeling in my stomach.

I think that would be guilt.

I don't know. I just wouldn't want her to stay awake and be tired for school tomorrow or anything, that's all. It's no big deal.

I know what you're saying, Syaoran, don't worry. Maybe you could look in on her on your way to bed. Just to see if she's not staying awake.

I think I will. Thanks, Klao. For not scolding me or anything. You've been… well. You know.

I know. Don't mention it, Syaoran. I hope you and Mei Ling sort things out.

Me too. Bye, Klao. I'll write soon.

Tuesday 30th May, 1998

Hello, Klao.

Hello Syaoran! Did you get a chance to sort things out with Mei Ling?

She hasn't spoken to me all day. I suppose I could say it's peaceful, at least.

Ah. Not forgiven, I see.

There's nothing to forgive! All right, I shouted at her, but she was being intrusive, and, and not respecting my privacy! It's not all my fault, she needs to apologise too, and-

Still feeling guilty, then.

Well, she should be, too.

You ought to talk to her, Syaoran.

Maybe. Can we… can we talk about something else?

Of course, if you'd like. Just remember that this problem isn't going to go away. Now, perhaps you'd like to fill me in on news of your mother? Or tell me about your training, or what's happening in the wider world, perchance?

Thanks, Klao. I can do all three. Another phone call from Mother today, but only to tell us when to expect her home. Eight o' cock, she said. That's in three hours. Only three hours, and then I'll finally know what's so important and secret that she can't tell us over the phone. I can't wait…

I have to admit, even I'm curious. I hope it's good news.

Me too! I promise I'll come and tell you all about it as soon as I know.

Careful, though. If your mother asks you to keep whatever it is secret, you needn't say anything to me.

Well… only if she makes me promise. But I trust you, Klao.

Thank you very much. And how is your training going…?

I got up early to do some Tai Chi before school this morning. I like being up early. I was in the courtyard, and the sun was rising, and the dawn light was coming in… I've never felt so calm. And there was nobody outside; I suppose Wai must have been up, but he would have been in the house. It was like there was nobody in the world at all. Just me and the dawn. There was a strange light on everything; not so much like the sun was on things, more like it came from things. Like a glow.

I used to meditate at dawn. It's a very magical time.

Yes. Sunset, Moonrise, Midnight and Sunrise. Times of magical potency.

You've been taught well, I see. Are you familiar with the name Chang O?

Chang O? Of course! Chang O is the Moon Goddess.

Then you also know her significance to the Li Clan?

It's where we draw our magical energy from. The moon has always governed the Li Clan. I was taught how to convert my magical energy into powers through the moon years ago; Mother taught me herself.

Magical powers are both a blessing and a curse. There is a lot of responsibility involved, although it sounds like you can handle it very well indeed.

Mei Ling once told me that if she had magical powers then she'd use them for everything. Ever since then I've been determined not to. I've trained, and practised my skills, but I've never actually had call to use them… not a really serious situation, at least. For me it would be a last resort. To use magical powers for normal, everyday things would feel… disrespectful.

You're very conscious of respect, Syaoran, I've noticed. But you're right. Magic is not something to be taken lightly; although I myself am guilty of using it to find easy ways out of mundane tasks.

You, Klao? Are you really?

Well, it was a different kind of magic to what you're used to, so I suppose the circumstances are slightly different as well. But yes, I have to admit, I didn't always need to use my magic when I did.

I can't imagine any of the magic I use to be any help for washing dishes or making food, that kind of thing. It's all combat-based. Like this book, Klao – I wouldn't even know how to begin using magic to enchant a diary.

I think that your magic powers have mainly been channelled into one area – combat, like you said. The truth is that there are no limits to what it can do, which is why it can be so dangerous. You need to exercise the utmost caution. I can tell that you handle your magic very responsibly, Syaoran.

I like to think so. But it's also partly because I can't use magic in front of, well, ordinary people. It's one of our rules.

Very wise.

Well, I've told you about Mother and about my training. Do you want to know about what's happening in the world?

Indeed I do!

Only… I don't know where to begin. You wrote in here four hundred years ago. How can I tell you four hundred years of history? It'll use up the whole book.

Oh, Syaoran! You don't think that I've not spoken to anyone since I wrote in here?

You – you don't mean – there have been others who've written in here?

Of course! I'm surprised you haven't asked me that before. Language, at least, has changed slightly since then. If I had not seen or heard anything of the last four hundred years, my speech would be a little strange to you. And what about you telling me about computers, and young women teaching classes, and your mother flying home from Beijing? It would all have been unheard of.

But… but why can't I see their writing in here?

Why can't you see my own diary entries in here? More magic, Syaoran. I told you I could be trusted to keep secrets. Every word that has written in here has been locked away, and won't resurface unless the person who wrote them opens the book again. The same with yours. I put this spell on the diary myself, to ensure the safety of the knowledge kept in it.

Klao, I had no idea! The knowledge kept in it? The secrets in this book must be incredible, then! How many people have written in here apart from me?

Many. Perhaps one day I'll tell you who. But for now, how about you fill me in on states of affairs? The last time someone wrote in here was more than twenty years ago.

Oh, Klao! Can't you tell me about anyone who wrote in here?

One day, maybe.

Spoilsport.

I'm afraid so.

Well, I can tell you about- oh, wait-

Syaoran? What-

Chun just came to give me a cup of tea. I slammed you shut again, I'm sorry. I didn't think.

That's all right.

She gave me a bit of a funny look; I think she's wondering what I'm suddenly writing in so often.

Syaoran, I've been meaning to ask you. Do your sisters train, too?

Not as much as I do. They've all got a thorough grounding in Kung Fu and Tai Chi, of course, but they've never trained as much as I have. And they don't really use much magic, either. I don't know… I mean, I know they're my sisters and everything, but they can be so… embarrassing.

Embarrassing?

They're such girls. Always cooing and giggling and trying to set me up with Mei Ling. They never take me seriously.

Oh, I see. Don't worry, Syaoran, I'm sure they do take you seriously, deep down. They're just showing their affection.

A simple smile would do. They don't have to try and dress me up and play with my hair all the time. Honestly, sometimes living in a diary sounds quite appealing.

I don't know if 'living' is quite the correct term. And I'm sure you'd miss them if they went. Mei Ling too.

Syaoran? Are you there?

Klao! It's Mother! She's come back early!

Ah!

She just walked in the door, it made me jump so much!

Well, why don't you go and say hello?

I will. I'll finally find out what's going on! I'll write later, Klao. I don't mean to cut off so suddenly like this; it's a bit rude, especially since we were in the middle of a conversation-

Go on! If you don't stop writing, you'll find it's midnight and she's gone to bed before you can ask her anything. Find out what's been happening in Beijing, I know you're dying to.

You're right, I am. Wait right here and I'll fill you in as soon as I can.

Wait right here, he says. I'm not likely to be swanning off into the sunset anytime soon, now, am I?

I never thought an ancient sorcerer would be so… sarcastic.

We live and learn.

I'm beginning to find that out.