Title: The Paradox of Existence
Author: DragonLight
Summary: The future repeats itself in the past, i.e. which came first the chicken or the egg.
Pairing: HP/SS
Rating: Now PG-13 to probably R or NC-17 later on
Author Note: I've never written a story like this before let alone read one. So if this story resembles anyone's no infringement was intended. This chapter shows one of the parallels that exist in the relationship b/w Harry and Severus in both times. You'll understand when you see it. The later part was inspired by my favorite type of detention fanfic - "The Dictionary Detention."
A secondary note. Sort of starting in this chapter is a switch from the set up chapters. You'll see more into the differences between Harrry and Severus. There will also be a more angsty turn to the story. You'll see what I mean. Enjoy.
Disclaimer: All characters that are the least bit familiar belong to JKR-same with places and items. Don't recognize it then it's mine.
Thank you's to everyone I missed last time, ff.net was acting wierd, but here are my thank you's from chapters 3&4&5 - Dark Hikari Kamiya, Athenakitty, JungAnya, Smiling D'hao, blackunicorn, Saavik, Jess the Great, Lady FoxFire, Nora Charles, Mikee, Caster, moraco, desert wren, atalante, sunny-historian, Cloudburst2000, Emma.
And a big thank you to my repeat reviewers: Kateri, Lee Lee Potter, Faerie Angst, Katy 999, Nagini. The fact that you let me know you're still reading keeps me writing
Kaat Shadowlover: Dumbledore mainly wanted Harry to think about what he was doing and to remember that the Severus in the past wasn't the same Severus he knew -keep them separate (if that makes sense) I always thought that there had to be more to the Severus Sirius relationship, I'm glad that you find it believable you'll actually find out a little more about it later. You'll definitely find out more about the bond.
~Mary~: As for the story behind the fight in the bar and other things that are mentioned, they are part of the back/side story to Paradox. I know all about them and after I finish writing Paradox, if people want the short vignettes I'll post them too as companion pieces.
I'm really glad that everyone liked the Harry-Draco interaction, I had a blast writing it. They're just so much fun to write. You'll see more of them later. Have fun.
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Chapter Six: Detentions
*The Past*
Severus Snape stared straight ahead. He'd been trying to get a detention in Professor Tyler's class for over two weeks. The only one that he'd managed to get he had to serve with Black and Lupin. It was just his luck that Black had decided it would be a great idea to pass notes. One would think that he would learn that Professor Tyler didn't tolerate misbehaving in his class. Severus turned to look out the window. He had until the end of the class to get detention, the Christmas holidays were starting the next day and Severus really doubted that any teacher would be handing out detentions over the holidays. Not that he was allowed to stay at Hogwarts over the holidays. A sharp voice snapped him out of his musings.
"Mr. Snape I asked you a question. Do you have an answer for me or are the grounds more interesting than what I have to say?"
Severus swallowed. Professor Tyler was obviously expecting an answer. "No sir."
"I see. 5 points Mr. Snape. Do pay attention."
"Yes sir."
"As I was saying…." Severus fell back into his thoughts. If he ended up getting detention for not paying attention so be it. Severus sighed not realizing that he was once again drawing attention to himself.
"Mr. Snape!" A book was slammed down onto his desk making him jump. "10 points. Good now that I have your attention, I'm only going to say this once. If I have to reprimand you once more during this class period you'll have detention. Do I make myself clear?"
"Yes sir." Severus' life just became so much easier. Now a small infraction that would normally only get points deducted from his house would land him in detention. He decided that if he was going to go down he might as well enjoy it. No magic though. That would only land him in detention with his head of house. A good old-fashioned spitball would be the best. Lucius used to shoot them during classes with their tutor while they were growing up. Within a minute a perfect spitball smacked into Sirius Black's cheek.
Sirius turned and glared at Snape before checking if Professor Tyler was looking. When Professor Tyler's back was turned Sirius knocked all of Severus' books onto the floor. Severus glared at Sirius and just loud enough to make sure that Professor Tyler could hear him he retaliated. "What do you think you're doing you mangy, good-for-nothing Gryffindor mongrel?!"
"Mr. Snape. I don't know how many times that I have mentioned I will not tolerate House prejudices, especially in my class. I do know that I told you one more disruption and you'd be receiving detention-"
Severus decided a token defense was in order. "But-"
"No buts Mr. Snape. I will see you tonight at eight, here. Now be quiet or I will turn you over to your Head of House to deal with you."
"Yes, sir."
"Good."
The rest of the class passed in a daze for Severus. He could finally get his professor's attention.
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Severus slowly made his way down the corridor to the Defense classroom. His body had been trembling with nerves before he had left his dormitory. It had taken a good five minutes before he could stop his body from visibly shaking. Everyone else thought it was because he had to face an extremely mad professor Tyler. Severus wasn't worried about that however. He had noticed that professor Tyler never stayed angry with anyone for an extended period of time.
Severus knew he was ten minutes late for his detention, he was hoping that professor Tyler wouldn't get angry with him. Especially since it would complicate his already precarious soon-to-be relationship with the professor. He knocked on the classroom door and entered after hearing a curt "Enter." Severus entered the room with trepidation. Looking toward the desk where Professor Tyler was sitting he apologized.
"Professor Tyler, I'm sorry about being late-" Tyler cut him off with a wave of his hand.
"Being perfectly on time or a few minutes late, there really isn't that big of a deal. I've transfigured the classroom a bit for your detention so get to work." Without looking up from whatever he was reading he waved toward the far side of the room. Turning around Severus finally took a look at the room. The desks had been piled in the middle of the room to make a wide aisle around the walls that had all been transfigured into blackboards. Floor to ceiling blackboards. "You are to copy that sentence, until you run out of blackboard. Get to work. Try not to write too large and be sure to write legibly."
Severus sighed and headed over to the wall. A stepladder had been placed nearby so that he could reach to the top. And there on the left hand side of the wall at the top was the sentence "I will not insult Sirius Black during class."
"Professor?"
"Let me guess, why that sentence?" Without giving Severus a chance to respond he continued. "What you did today in class was unacceptable. House pride is one thing but house prejudice is another. I will not tolerate it. Since it was Mr. Black that you insulted it is his name I want you to write. Besides you tend to insult him more than any other student. It made perfect sense. Well what are you waiting for?"
Severus turned away from the teacher. He looked so tired Severus felt bad for him. Sighing he picked up the chalk and climbed the step ladder…
… Half a wall later Severus' mind was wandering at top speed. Deciding that he just couldn't write the same sentence anymore he decided that Professor Tyler wouldn't notice if he just changed it for a bit. At least if it still looked the same. Having made his decision he wrote, "I will not kiss Sirius Black during class." Well that was certainly something he would never do. Severus set to work on his new sentence….
… A quarter of the way down the next wall an idea finally came to Severus. He had been attempting to figure out a way to turn the detention to his advantage like he had been planning. He could gradually change words until the sentence was totally different. The next word changed. "I will not kiss Professor Black during class." That was worth a laugh since there would never be a chance that Sirius Black would ever become a teacher. He was too stupid.
… "I will not kiss Professor Tyler during class." Definitely not during class; too many witnesses…
… "I will not… not kiss Professor Tyler during detention. Double negative." Must remedy. "I will kiss Professor Tyler during detention."
… "I would--"
"Well Mr. Snape lets see how well you did." Professor Tyler was standing in the corner where he had begun. Now that it came down to it Severus was nervous about Professor Tyler seeing how he had changed his punishment. It seemed like a good idea at the time. Severus decided that he really should have thought the whole idea through a little more.
"All seems to be in or-" Professor Tyler stopped in front of the first change.
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Harry couldn't believe it. Severus Snape had actually altered his punishment. And of all the things to change it to. "I had heard something about that particular relationship. Not that I would allow such public displays in my classroom anyway." Perhaps Sirius had been right and he was spending too much time with Severus, that had been an utterly Snapeish thing to say. Harry decided to continue down the wall.
"Since when had Mr. Black become a professor, Mr. Snape?" Harry watched as Severus shifted from foot to foot. Harry started to get an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach. He continued on anyway.
"I would certainly hope that you wouldn't kiss a professor. A highly inappropriate action." Harry forced himself to continue. Might as well finish the thing. Severus seemed to be really nervous and getting more nervous by the minute. Harry hoped that if he made light of the whole situation maybe he could just dismiss it. However that idea fled as he stopped at one of the final changes. Before he could come up with an appropriate response Severus spoke.
"I would you know." Severus stopped shuffling in his feet and looked Professor Tyler in the eyes. "I would like to in fact." Severus started to walk toward his professor but Harry backed away.
"I think that you should leave Mr. Snape."
"Professor-"
"Please leave Mr. Snape."
"No-"
"Then I will remove myself. I would like my classroom back within the hour. Without you in it." With a wave of his wand the blackboard changed back to the walls. Harry turned on his heel and walked out the door. The door closed silently behind him. After the door closed Severus sunk down to the floor, wrapped his arms around his knees and buried his head, wondering how someone usually considered smart could become so stupid.
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*Future: Harry's sixth year*
Harry approached the door to Professor Snape's office with a dictionary tucked under one arm. He didn't feel nervous until he stopped in front of the door. He had gotten along with the professor all through the Christmas holidays while they had been on assignment for the Order. In fact he had learned quite a bit about the man who was his potions master. There was a lot more to him then the snarky bastard that he presented to everyone around him. Granted that didn't mean he wasn't a snarky bastard because he still was.
Something that Snape had said made Harry really think. At one point they had almost lost Remus to an overzealous auror. The auror had figured that if he brought in Lupin he might be able to get a better review that would lead to a promotion. Harry had gotten pretty upset and almost lost his control of his magic. Snape on the other hand kept a cool head and was able to stun the auror and get Remus loose. That night over their dinner "Severus" had opened up a little bit to the young man across from him. "Harry, you can't let your emotions get the better of you. When that happens idiotic mistakes are made with consequences far worse than an exploding cauldron. One must always pay attention to the task at hand. It is the only way to survive." It had been the first and only time that Snape had called him by his given name. The next afternoon they were back at Hogwarts and Harry had once again become "Potter."
Harry had begun to keep a close eye on the potions professor. He started to compare everything to the man he had seen over the Christmas holidays. He watched during the times that Snape supervised his extra Defense lessons. He watched during potions class, when he was being ignored or while he was getting a tongue-lashing. He watched the professor interact with the people around him. Each was on a different level. Harry had always thought that Snape didn't have any emotions, but after watching him he realized that Snape looked to Dumbledore as a father/grandfather figure. He saw him treat Remus as a close comrade; Harry would almost go as far as to say a brother. Draco seemed to be treated as a favored nephew. The only relation he couldn't figure out was his godfather. He honestly seemed to detest Sirius although he did listen when Sirius had something to say. His godfather acted similarly. The more Harry watched his professor the more he wanted to get to know him.
Harry started noticing other things as well. Professor Snape was attractive when he wanted to be. Harry had discovered that the fumes from the potions were what made Snape's hair look greasy. Recalling the soft waves that Snape's hair had fallen in during the holidays Harry had begun to wonder what it would be like to run his fingers through it. That thought had originally startled him, but he had soon gotten over it. Harry also noticed that when his lips weren't pressed into a straight line in annoyance at exceptionally dismal students, which were never ending as far as potions go, his lips weren't really as thin as they seemed. In fact Harry had found them almost kissable.
Harry hadn't realized how much time he had just stood outside of the door lost in thought. It was brought to his detention when the door opened abruptly and an annoyed professor stood in the doorway. "Potter. Do come in. I trust that you brought your dictionary?"
"Yes professor." Harry stared the other man in the eyes. For some reason it always seemed to unnerve the older man. Harry supposed that it had something to do with his mother. Snape looked away quickly and stepped aside to allow Harry to enter. Harry moved past his professor thinking about the black eyes. They always seemed so emotionless. Harry thought that it might be due to the color. Sometimes though he could swear he saw flashes of emotion in them. For example right before Snape looked away he that he saw a flash of sadness. Harry shook the thought away. He had a plan to put into action. He was planning on getting to know his professor a little better. Biblically speaking.
Snape moved over to his desk and sat down. "I'm sure that you've heard how this works. You stand in front of the desk, state definitions from the dictionary and then use the word in a sentence. I don't care what words you use. I assure you I've heard them all before. Start."
Harry moved into his position in front of the desk. Harry opened the dictionary to the page he had marked earlier in the day. After he found out that the detention that he would be serving was the infamous "dictionary detention" he set up all his words in advance. Best to start off safe though.
"Tabby: a cat with a striped or brindled coat. My former babysitter had many cats, some of which were tabbys."
"Sun: the star that is the central body of the solar system, around which the planets revolve. Quidditch becomes increasingly difficult to play when the sun is shining in your eyes." Harry spared a glance at his teacher. Snape was reading a book and seemed to not even be paying any attention. Harry decided that he should test the assumption. Keeping an eye on his teacher he flipped to the next word. "Private: belonging to some particular person or persons. I always wondered what it would be like to be someone's private property." A slight flicker of the eyes was the only reaction that was noticeable but nothing more.
"Sultan: the sovereign of an Islamic country. I'd like to be in your harem if you were a sultan." A glance upward and a raised eyebrow was his only acknowledgement.
"Taste: to have a particular flavor. I'm sure that you taste delectable." Nothing. Someone must have tried that one before.
"Lick: to pass the tongue over the surface of. It is always wise to start with licking…" Snape looked up at him. "…When eating ice cream." Harry smiled mischievously at his professor as he finished his sentence. Snape returned to his book.
"Study: application of the mind to the acquisition of knowledge, as by reading, investigation, or reflection. Muggles use the phrase 'studying anatomy' as another way of saying snogging." A slight quirk of the lips was his reward.
"Homework: schoolwork assigned to be done outside the classroom. I wouldn't mind nearly as much if my potions homework was studying you." This time Severus took a deep breath, but didn't look up at Harry.
"Habiliments: clothes as worn in a particular profession, way of life. I think that your habiliments should be removed. After all I'm positive that you look quite sexy underneath them."
"Potter that was two sentences, and you didn't even use the word in the second sentence." Harry could tell that Snape was avoiding looking at him. Harry felt that he was getting somewhere.
"Sorry, professor. It won't happen again. Kiss: to join lips as in affection or love. I've always wondered what it would be like to be kissed by someone who sees the real me." Harry didn't even bother looking at Snape. Snape had looked at him though and noticed the blush that tinged Harry's cheeks.
"Seduction: the act or an instance of seducing, especially sexually. Seduction is a tricky business. Process: a systematic series of actions directed to some end. The process must be handled delicately." There was no doubt that the second sentence was to be attached to the first.
"Show: to prove or demonstrate. Sometimes an individual has to show the object of their affections how much they mean to them." Snape had stopped the pretense of reading his book and watched Harry. Harry on the other hand had stopped looking at Snape.
"Strip: to deprive of covering, clothing, or the like. If I thought it would help I'd strip for you."
"Reject: to refuse to have, take, or act upon. Even if I offered I know that you'd reject the proposition."
"Live: to remain alive. I guess that I'll just have to live the rest of my life without knowing what your lips feel like against mine."
"Against: in contact with. I would love to press my body against yours." Harry finally looked up from the ground where he had been looking. Severus saw the unhidden lust there. As if reading his mind the next word issued from Harry's lips.
"Lust: to have a passionate yearning or desire. I lust after your touch which I have yet to experience."
"Habile: skillful or dexterous. I want you to touch me with you habile hands."
"Genuine: free from pretense, affection, or hypocrisy; sincere. Everything I have said tonight has been genuine."
"Potter stop." Snape folded his hands on top of his desk and looked hard at the boy in front of him. No that wasn't right, Harry wasn't a boy. He had seen too much to be considered such. Something didn't work right, however because Harry took a step toward him, heading around the desk.
"You're dismissed." Potter nodded his head in acknowledgement but continued around the desk. He knelt down on his knees next the older man. Severus turned to look at him. He raised one eyebrow.
"Stop that. Don't hide behind the potions master. You're more than that Professor." Harry lifted his hand and rested it against Severus' cheek. Harry moved his hand from Severus' cheek to the back of his neck. He coaxed the head down and met Severus' lips halfway. The kiss started out tentative but turned passionate as Severus gave in. Severus ran his tongue over the younger man's lips urging them to part. Harry willingly complied and Severus explored and ravaged the mouth beneath his. Harry lost all control of the kiss as Severus grasped Harry's arms and pulled him up and onto his lap. Finally the kiss ended with them both out of breath.
Severus leaned his forehead against Harry's and took in a deep steadying breath. "I think that you should go Harry."
"But-"
"Please don't argue. I can't do this right now. We can't do this right now. And I can't deal with this right now. Please."
Harry saw torn emotions in the other's eyes and decided to honor the man's request. He stood reluctantly and headed for the door grabbing his dictionary on the way out. He would wait awhile before making his next move. Exiting and closing the door behind him he walked a little down the hall before stopping to lean against the wall and regain his composure before going to back to his dormitory.
Severus retired to his private chambers and sat in his chair by the fire, thinking about the situation that had just arose in his office. He had come to understand the young man over the time they had been forced to spend together. Staring into the fire Severus pondered if he was falling for the "boy-who-lived." It couldn't be possible especially since he swore to himself that he would never fall in love again.
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Read and Review. Positive feedback makes me write faster!
Author: DragonLight
Summary: The future repeats itself in the past, i.e. which came first the chicken or the egg.
Pairing: HP/SS
Rating: Now PG-13 to probably R or NC-17 later on
Author Note: I've never written a story like this before let alone read one. So if this story resembles anyone's no infringement was intended. This chapter shows one of the parallels that exist in the relationship b/w Harry and Severus in both times. You'll understand when you see it. The later part was inspired by my favorite type of detention fanfic - "The Dictionary Detention."
A secondary note. Sort of starting in this chapter is a switch from the set up chapters. You'll see more into the differences between Harrry and Severus. There will also be a more angsty turn to the story. You'll see what I mean. Enjoy.
Disclaimer: All characters that are the least bit familiar belong to JKR-same with places and items. Don't recognize it then it's mine.
Thank you's to everyone I missed last time, ff.net was acting wierd, but here are my thank you's from chapters 3&4&5 - Dark Hikari Kamiya, Athenakitty, JungAnya, Smiling D'hao, blackunicorn, Saavik, Jess the Great, Lady FoxFire, Nora Charles, Mikee, Caster, moraco, desert wren, atalante, sunny-historian, Cloudburst2000, Emma.
And a big thank you to my repeat reviewers: Kateri, Lee Lee Potter, Faerie Angst, Katy 999, Nagini. The fact that you let me know you're still reading keeps me writing
Kaat Shadowlover: Dumbledore mainly wanted Harry to think about what he was doing and to remember that the Severus in the past wasn't the same Severus he knew -keep them separate (if that makes sense) I always thought that there had to be more to the Severus Sirius relationship, I'm glad that you find it believable you'll actually find out a little more about it later. You'll definitely find out more about the bond.
~Mary~: As for the story behind the fight in the bar and other things that are mentioned, they are part of the back/side story to Paradox. I know all about them and after I finish writing Paradox, if people want the short vignettes I'll post them too as companion pieces.
I'm really glad that everyone liked the Harry-Draco interaction, I had a blast writing it. They're just so much fun to write. You'll see more of them later. Have fun.
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Chapter Six: Detentions
*The Past*
Severus Snape stared straight ahead. He'd been trying to get a detention in Professor Tyler's class for over two weeks. The only one that he'd managed to get he had to serve with Black and Lupin. It was just his luck that Black had decided it would be a great idea to pass notes. One would think that he would learn that Professor Tyler didn't tolerate misbehaving in his class. Severus turned to look out the window. He had until the end of the class to get detention, the Christmas holidays were starting the next day and Severus really doubted that any teacher would be handing out detentions over the holidays. Not that he was allowed to stay at Hogwarts over the holidays. A sharp voice snapped him out of his musings.
"Mr. Snape I asked you a question. Do you have an answer for me or are the grounds more interesting than what I have to say?"
Severus swallowed. Professor Tyler was obviously expecting an answer. "No sir."
"I see. 5 points Mr. Snape. Do pay attention."
"Yes sir."
"As I was saying…." Severus fell back into his thoughts. If he ended up getting detention for not paying attention so be it. Severus sighed not realizing that he was once again drawing attention to himself.
"Mr. Snape!" A book was slammed down onto his desk making him jump. "10 points. Good now that I have your attention, I'm only going to say this once. If I have to reprimand you once more during this class period you'll have detention. Do I make myself clear?"
"Yes sir." Severus' life just became so much easier. Now a small infraction that would normally only get points deducted from his house would land him in detention. He decided that if he was going to go down he might as well enjoy it. No magic though. That would only land him in detention with his head of house. A good old-fashioned spitball would be the best. Lucius used to shoot them during classes with their tutor while they were growing up. Within a minute a perfect spitball smacked into Sirius Black's cheek.
Sirius turned and glared at Snape before checking if Professor Tyler was looking. When Professor Tyler's back was turned Sirius knocked all of Severus' books onto the floor. Severus glared at Sirius and just loud enough to make sure that Professor Tyler could hear him he retaliated. "What do you think you're doing you mangy, good-for-nothing Gryffindor mongrel?!"
"Mr. Snape. I don't know how many times that I have mentioned I will not tolerate House prejudices, especially in my class. I do know that I told you one more disruption and you'd be receiving detention-"
Severus decided a token defense was in order. "But-"
"No buts Mr. Snape. I will see you tonight at eight, here. Now be quiet or I will turn you over to your Head of House to deal with you."
"Yes, sir."
"Good."
The rest of the class passed in a daze for Severus. He could finally get his professor's attention.
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Severus slowly made his way down the corridor to the Defense classroom. His body had been trembling with nerves before he had left his dormitory. It had taken a good five minutes before he could stop his body from visibly shaking. Everyone else thought it was because he had to face an extremely mad professor Tyler. Severus wasn't worried about that however. He had noticed that professor Tyler never stayed angry with anyone for an extended period of time.
Severus knew he was ten minutes late for his detention, he was hoping that professor Tyler wouldn't get angry with him. Especially since it would complicate his already precarious soon-to-be relationship with the professor. He knocked on the classroom door and entered after hearing a curt "Enter." Severus entered the room with trepidation. Looking toward the desk where Professor Tyler was sitting he apologized.
"Professor Tyler, I'm sorry about being late-" Tyler cut him off with a wave of his hand.
"Being perfectly on time or a few minutes late, there really isn't that big of a deal. I've transfigured the classroom a bit for your detention so get to work." Without looking up from whatever he was reading he waved toward the far side of the room. Turning around Severus finally took a look at the room. The desks had been piled in the middle of the room to make a wide aisle around the walls that had all been transfigured into blackboards. Floor to ceiling blackboards. "You are to copy that sentence, until you run out of blackboard. Get to work. Try not to write too large and be sure to write legibly."
Severus sighed and headed over to the wall. A stepladder had been placed nearby so that he could reach to the top. And there on the left hand side of the wall at the top was the sentence "I will not insult Sirius Black during class."
"Professor?"
"Let me guess, why that sentence?" Without giving Severus a chance to respond he continued. "What you did today in class was unacceptable. House pride is one thing but house prejudice is another. I will not tolerate it. Since it was Mr. Black that you insulted it is his name I want you to write. Besides you tend to insult him more than any other student. It made perfect sense. Well what are you waiting for?"
Severus turned away from the teacher. He looked so tired Severus felt bad for him. Sighing he picked up the chalk and climbed the step ladder…
… Half a wall later Severus' mind was wandering at top speed. Deciding that he just couldn't write the same sentence anymore he decided that Professor Tyler wouldn't notice if he just changed it for a bit. At least if it still looked the same. Having made his decision he wrote, "I will not kiss Sirius Black during class." Well that was certainly something he would never do. Severus set to work on his new sentence….
… A quarter of the way down the next wall an idea finally came to Severus. He had been attempting to figure out a way to turn the detention to his advantage like he had been planning. He could gradually change words until the sentence was totally different. The next word changed. "I will not kiss Professor Black during class." That was worth a laugh since there would never be a chance that Sirius Black would ever become a teacher. He was too stupid.
… "I will not kiss Professor Tyler during class." Definitely not during class; too many witnesses…
… "I will not… not kiss Professor Tyler during detention. Double negative." Must remedy. "I will kiss Professor Tyler during detention."
… "I would--"
"Well Mr. Snape lets see how well you did." Professor Tyler was standing in the corner where he had begun. Now that it came down to it Severus was nervous about Professor Tyler seeing how he had changed his punishment. It seemed like a good idea at the time. Severus decided that he really should have thought the whole idea through a little more.
"All seems to be in or-" Professor Tyler stopped in front of the first change.
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Harry couldn't believe it. Severus Snape had actually altered his punishment. And of all the things to change it to. "I had heard something about that particular relationship. Not that I would allow such public displays in my classroom anyway." Perhaps Sirius had been right and he was spending too much time with Severus, that had been an utterly Snapeish thing to say. Harry decided to continue down the wall.
"Since when had Mr. Black become a professor, Mr. Snape?" Harry watched as Severus shifted from foot to foot. Harry started to get an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach. He continued on anyway.
"I would certainly hope that you wouldn't kiss a professor. A highly inappropriate action." Harry forced himself to continue. Might as well finish the thing. Severus seemed to be really nervous and getting more nervous by the minute. Harry hoped that if he made light of the whole situation maybe he could just dismiss it. However that idea fled as he stopped at one of the final changes. Before he could come up with an appropriate response Severus spoke.
"I would you know." Severus stopped shuffling in his feet and looked Professor Tyler in the eyes. "I would like to in fact." Severus started to walk toward his professor but Harry backed away.
"I think that you should leave Mr. Snape."
"Professor-"
"Please leave Mr. Snape."
"No-"
"Then I will remove myself. I would like my classroom back within the hour. Without you in it." With a wave of his wand the blackboard changed back to the walls. Harry turned on his heel and walked out the door. The door closed silently behind him. After the door closed Severus sunk down to the floor, wrapped his arms around his knees and buried his head, wondering how someone usually considered smart could become so stupid.
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*Future: Harry's sixth year*
Harry approached the door to Professor Snape's office with a dictionary tucked under one arm. He didn't feel nervous until he stopped in front of the door. He had gotten along with the professor all through the Christmas holidays while they had been on assignment for the Order. In fact he had learned quite a bit about the man who was his potions master. There was a lot more to him then the snarky bastard that he presented to everyone around him. Granted that didn't mean he wasn't a snarky bastard because he still was.
Something that Snape had said made Harry really think. At one point they had almost lost Remus to an overzealous auror. The auror had figured that if he brought in Lupin he might be able to get a better review that would lead to a promotion. Harry had gotten pretty upset and almost lost his control of his magic. Snape on the other hand kept a cool head and was able to stun the auror and get Remus loose. That night over their dinner "Severus" had opened up a little bit to the young man across from him. "Harry, you can't let your emotions get the better of you. When that happens idiotic mistakes are made with consequences far worse than an exploding cauldron. One must always pay attention to the task at hand. It is the only way to survive." It had been the first and only time that Snape had called him by his given name. The next afternoon they were back at Hogwarts and Harry had once again become "Potter."
Harry had begun to keep a close eye on the potions professor. He started to compare everything to the man he had seen over the Christmas holidays. He watched during the times that Snape supervised his extra Defense lessons. He watched during potions class, when he was being ignored or while he was getting a tongue-lashing. He watched the professor interact with the people around him. Each was on a different level. Harry had always thought that Snape didn't have any emotions, but after watching him he realized that Snape looked to Dumbledore as a father/grandfather figure. He saw him treat Remus as a close comrade; Harry would almost go as far as to say a brother. Draco seemed to be treated as a favored nephew. The only relation he couldn't figure out was his godfather. He honestly seemed to detest Sirius although he did listen when Sirius had something to say. His godfather acted similarly. The more Harry watched his professor the more he wanted to get to know him.
Harry started noticing other things as well. Professor Snape was attractive when he wanted to be. Harry had discovered that the fumes from the potions were what made Snape's hair look greasy. Recalling the soft waves that Snape's hair had fallen in during the holidays Harry had begun to wonder what it would be like to run his fingers through it. That thought had originally startled him, but he had soon gotten over it. Harry also noticed that when his lips weren't pressed into a straight line in annoyance at exceptionally dismal students, which were never ending as far as potions go, his lips weren't really as thin as they seemed. In fact Harry had found them almost kissable.
Harry hadn't realized how much time he had just stood outside of the door lost in thought. It was brought to his detention when the door opened abruptly and an annoyed professor stood in the doorway. "Potter. Do come in. I trust that you brought your dictionary?"
"Yes professor." Harry stared the other man in the eyes. For some reason it always seemed to unnerve the older man. Harry supposed that it had something to do with his mother. Snape looked away quickly and stepped aside to allow Harry to enter. Harry moved past his professor thinking about the black eyes. They always seemed so emotionless. Harry thought that it might be due to the color. Sometimes though he could swear he saw flashes of emotion in them. For example right before Snape looked away he that he saw a flash of sadness. Harry shook the thought away. He had a plan to put into action. He was planning on getting to know his professor a little better. Biblically speaking.
Snape moved over to his desk and sat down. "I'm sure that you've heard how this works. You stand in front of the desk, state definitions from the dictionary and then use the word in a sentence. I don't care what words you use. I assure you I've heard them all before. Start."
Harry moved into his position in front of the desk. Harry opened the dictionary to the page he had marked earlier in the day. After he found out that the detention that he would be serving was the infamous "dictionary detention" he set up all his words in advance. Best to start off safe though.
"Tabby: a cat with a striped or brindled coat. My former babysitter had many cats, some of which were tabbys."
"Sun: the star that is the central body of the solar system, around which the planets revolve. Quidditch becomes increasingly difficult to play when the sun is shining in your eyes." Harry spared a glance at his teacher. Snape was reading a book and seemed to not even be paying any attention. Harry decided that he should test the assumption. Keeping an eye on his teacher he flipped to the next word. "Private: belonging to some particular person or persons. I always wondered what it would be like to be someone's private property." A slight flicker of the eyes was the only reaction that was noticeable but nothing more.
"Sultan: the sovereign of an Islamic country. I'd like to be in your harem if you were a sultan." A glance upward and a raised eyebrow was his only acknowledgement.
"Taste: to have a particular flavor. I'm sure that you taste delectable." Nothing. Someone must have tried that one before.
"Lick: to pass the tongue over the surface of. It is always wise to start with licking…" Snape looked up at him. "…When eating ice cream." Harry smiled mischievously at his professor as he finished his sentence. Snape returned to his book.
"Study: application of the mind to the acquisition of knowledge, as by reading, investigation, or reflection. Muggles use the phrase 'studying anatomy' as another way of saying snogging." A slight quirk of the lips was his reward.
"Homework: schoolwork assigned to be done outside the classroom. I wouldn't mind nearly as much if my potions homework was studying you." This time Severus took a deep breath, but didn't look up at Harry.
"Habiliments: clothes as worn in a particular profession, way of life. I think that your habiliments should be removed. After all I'm positive that you look quite sexy underneath them."
"Potter that was two sentences, and you didn't even use the word in the second sentence." Harry could tell that Snape was avoiding looking at him. Harry felt that he was getting somewhere.
"Sorry, professor. It won't happen again. Kiss: to join lips as in affection or love. I've always wondered what it would be like to be kissed by someone who sees the real me." Harry didn't even bother looking at Snape. Snape had looked at him though and noticed the blush that tinged Harry's cheeks.
"Seduction: the act or an instance of seducing, especially sexually. Seduction is a tricky business. Process: a systematic series of actions directed to some end. The process must be handled delicately." There was no doubt that the second sentence was to be attached to the first.
"Show: to prove or demonstrate. Sometimes an individual has to show the object of their affections how much they mean to them." Snape had stopped the pretense of reading his book and watched Harry. Harry on the other hand had stopped looking at Snape.
"Strip: to deprive of covering, clothing, or the like. If I thought it would help I'd strip for you."
"Reject: to refuse to have, take, or act upon. Even if I offered I know that you'd reject the proposition."
"Live: to remain alive. I guess that I'll just have to live the rest of my life without knowing what your lips feel like against mine."
"Against: in contact with. I would love to press my body against yours." Harry finally looked up from the ground where he had been looking. Severus saw the unhidden lust there. As if reading his mind the next word issued from Harry's lips.
"Lust: to have a passionate yearning or desire. I lust after your touch which I have yet to experience."
"Habile: skillful or dexterous. I want you to touch me with you habile hands."
"Genuine: free from pretense, affection, or hypocrisy; sincere. Everything I have said tonight has been genuine."
"Potter stop." Snape folded his hands on top of his desk and looked hard at the boy in front of him. No that wasn't right, Harry wasn't a boy. He had seen too much to be considered such. Something didn't work right, however because Harry took a step toward him, heading around the desk.
"You're dismissed." Potter nodded his head in acknowledgement but continued around the desk. He knelt down on his knees next the older man. Severus turned to look at him. He raised one eyebrow.
"Stop that. Don't hide behind the potions master. You're more than that Professor." Harry lifted his hand and rested it against Severus' cheek. Harry moved his hand from Severus' cheek to the back of his neck. He coaxed the head down and met Severus' lips halfway. The kiss started out tentative but turned passionate as Severus gave in. Severus ran his tongue over the younger man's lips urging them to part. Harry willingly complied and Severus explored and ravaged the mouth beneath his. Harry lost all control of the kiss as Severus grasped Harry's arms and pulled him up and onto his lap. Finally the kiss ended with them both out of breath.
Severus leaned his forehead against Harry's and took in a deep steadying breath. "I think that you should go Harry."
"But-"
"Please don't argue. I can't do this right now. We can't do this right now. And I can't deal with this right now. Please."
Harry saw torn emotions in the other's eyes and decided to honor the man's request. He stood reluctantly and headed for the door grabbing his dictionary on the way out. He would wait awhile before making his next move. Exiting and closing the door behind him he walked a little down the hall before stopping to lean against the wall and regain his composure before going to back to his dormitory.
Severus retired to his private chambers and sat in his chair by the fire, thinking about the situation that had just arose in his office. He had come to understand the young man over the time they had been forced to spend together. Staring into the fire Severus pondered if he was falling for the "boy-who-lived." It couldn't be possible especially since he swore to himself that he would never fall in love again.
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