Disclaimer: I don't own Fushigi Yuugi. There.

AAAAAAAAHHH!!!! I'm sorry! I could put up excuse after excuse after excuse, but I won't. All I'll say is that I hate this chapter because it gave me such a hard time. But, you be the judge. Was it worth of the two month wait?

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"You can't! This soon? This isn't fair, springing this on you like this!" I jumped up quickly, pulled by my emotions, not wanting to believe what he said. I knew it was true; why would he lie to me with a lie such as this one? Plus, with the look in his eye... He means it. Every heart breaking word he speaks is the truth. A truth that I'd rather not face, just as he feels, I'm sure.

"Look, I can't help it." His eyes stared up at mine, both of their violet depths filled with an endless surrender.

"I know you want, but still..." I flopped back onto the couch, sinking into its soft surface. The cushions billow up around me, surrounding the two of us easily. "Do you have to go Ry?"

"Can't get out of it, no matter how hard I try. And believe me, I did try." I sank deeper into the couch, moving closer to him, and he responded by wrapping a sturdy, yet willow-like arm around my waist.

"When are you leaving?" He sighed, letting time tick by slowly before he opened his lips to answer.

"Soon, and why bother talking about this? I sure as hell don't want to, and I know that you hate being depressed." He's true... Too true. I've been through so much during this short lifetime to last this one and more. And now...

I listened to his wish of silence. Every emotion inside swam in my head, wanting to come out, wanting to express the depths of pain I was currently feeling. I couldn't say a word, however. How can you say what you feel when words cannot even grasp the full impact of any strong emotion?

Exhaustion set in slowly, as I fought the emotions begging to burst forth, just as I always do whenever I feel the need to be quiet, to not speak my mind and say what I like. My head slowly connected with his shoulder, creating what I wanted: a substitute pillow. His arm, once around my waist, reached up to gently grasp the brown strands of hair upon my head. It was comforting, adding to the gentle aura surrounding us, giving me a sense of relief, of relaxation.

"Tired?" My head moved slightly, and I knew he had captured the jest of the slight move I made. His reaction was to loosen the grip upon me he had, and I snuggled closer to the warmth he let off.

"You really have to go?" I don't know why I'm using the word 'go'. It's not like he's coming back... I think. He might, but it's not likely. Not with what he's been told to do.

"Can't get out of it." The dissatisfaction of what he was told to do shone through his voice, and I shut up quickly, not wanting to hurt either of us anymore. But, as the time ticked by us, and the precious hours we had left slowly disappeared, the questions piled up into my head, refusing to leave until they were answered.

Finally, he stood, his small stature taking control of the room, his presence somehow demanding, and turned to me, his eyes no longer gleaming, unlike the usual spark they had.

"It's late, and I know that you've got work tomorrow. Plus, I have to take care of stuff in the morning, so I can't be dead for tomorrow." His hand extended out, reaching for mine, which I gladly accepted. He pulled me up easily with slender arms, and refused to let my wrists go as soon as I was standing. He stood there, rooted to the ground, until his left hand left my wrist, and drifted up to my face, where it grazed the side of my jaw, making it's way up to my check, where it stopped, and remained. His sweet manner, and the way he looked at me, as if he never wanted to let me go, made something inside break. I hadn't wanted to break down, I didn't want to cry as hard as I was now, but I was.

Falling into his arms, I continued to sob as I tried to reason with him every little excuse I could think of for crying so suddenly and harshly. He stood there, holding me tightly, listening to every pathetic excuse that rolled of my tongue, never saying a word. He stroked my head gently as words began to fail me, and every thought in my head began to twirl together, until I could not tell the difference between one thought and another. He wrapped his arms tighter around me when my grip increased, just to make sure that he wouldn't leave. He never questioned anything, but just held me there, waiting for the tears to calm down enough so that one little word that escaped his lips wouldn't make the tears, once again, fall down my tear streaked face.

"Shh... Just listen to me now," he whispered into my ear gently. "I don't want to make you cry again, so please don't cry." He backed away for a moment, and stared into my tear-filled eyes for a moment, before reaching up and wiping away a solitary tear before starting again. "I don't care that you're crying. You've always cried. Even when I told you not to cry, you always did. So no excuses for me, ok?" I nodded, and he sighed, pulling me closer, until his head rested in the crook of my shoulder. I held him closer, just as he was doing with me, letting his warmth sink in, his love creep into my body, along with every other emotion he held deep within his heart. My tears that had slowed down earlier had stopped, and I was actually much more calm than I was only minutes ago.

"Hey, Ry?" He nodded, and clung to me tighter. "Thank you."

"For what?" He snuck a glance at me, and his eyes were filled with questions.

"For everything." An innocent smile was sent his way, and, although his lips still remained in a frown, his eyes smiled back at me.

"What is that, a goodbye?" He stood to his full height, his lips looming dangerously close to my temple.

"No, never." His lips curved up, and he glanced down, looking deeply into my eyes. "I could never say goodbye to you," was whispered softly into his ear.

"Then don't," he said softly, before pressing his forehead to mine and pressing his lips against mine, kissing me with intensity filled with affection and bittersweet sorrow. Returning the passion, I poured every emotion I could find within my heart into him, letting my actions speak for what I could not say. If possible, his already tighten grip pulled me closer, and he deepened the kiss, feeding me his adoration and sentiment.

The chiming of the clock scared the both of us, and after sneaking a glance, I realized how late it was. Realization clicked in, and I noted that tomorrow- or rather today- I would be dead to the world, due to my lack of sleep, although mainly it would be from the future lack of Ry- the one who I had spent so much time with lately. I'm going to miss him so much...

"Oh, don't start crying now on me!" He scooped me up into his arms, and fell backwards onto the couch, cradling me in his arms while my legs were thrown over the side of the couch. His arm drifted away from my side, and his thumb lightly brushed under my eyes, wiping away the tears I brought upon myself.

"Can't you just stay for tonight?" He looked at me for a moment oddly, then nodded slightly.

"Gonna make tomorrow harder... Plus you gotta get up early." His gentle teasing words made me smile, and I took pleasure in the fact that he could still make me laugh, despite any angst we would go through- or what we went through.

"I don't care." I laid my head upon his shoulder, took his free hand, and linked it with mine, our fingers molding together as if they were one. As he yawned, I snuggled into his chest, and shut my eyes slowly, waiting for exhaustion to take me over. And, maybe for once, I was glad to fall asleep. He was there with me, and I knew he wouldn't leave, not after what I had been through; what he had been through.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey... hey, you awake?" I heard his prodding, and I knew that he was still there... Meaning last night wasn't a dream. That he's going away. That he's leaving me. Isn't that a great way to start a morning?

"Mmm... I'm here." I heard his outtake of breath, and opened my eyes, my first vision of the morning being his relaxed face, despite his eyes being more tense than normal.

"Good... I was afraid that if I couldn't get you up, then I'd have to either leave you asleep, or force you to wake up!" I saw his smile, the one he always wore, and knew that, despite his joking, he would never leave me. He couldn't leave me, nor would he ever without my knowing.

"Well, I'm awake now."

"So you are," were his last words before he leaned over and sealed his lips over mine in a sweet kiss. He pulled away moments later, and rested his forehead on mine. "Morning. You hungry?"

"Of course I am... Why wouldn't I be?" He grinned, then stood up, taking me up with him. After setting me down lightly, he strolled over to the kitchen. However, his intention to cook (what had always been something he had always liked to do, from then to now) had been cut short when we both heard the ring of his phone. He dashed to get it, and as he spoke, each muscle on his face fell, and his eyes emitted so much angst and sadness from them. As soon as he hung up, he dialed another number, and woke up the person on the other line (who I later learned from the screams on the other line was Galen), asking for a ride. All the wile he spoke, his eyes remain locked upon me in an eerie gaze, as if afraid of what might happen in the future.

"Where did you need to go? I could have given you a ride."

"I don't want you crying all the way home."

"I'm still going to cry, you know." He came closer to me, his gaze still locked upon me. He reached out for me, and I fell into his arms, holding onto him tightly.

"I know you are. That's why I love you." Then all words ceased to be said as our goodbye began, my eyes sealed, but still seeing stars and dropping tears down onto my cheeks, his arms gently holding me with the amazing strength he possessed, and our lips never leaving each other until the doorbell rang, pulling us apart in a cruel twist of fate.

"Don't cry... Please don't cry. I promise to come back as soon as I can." He smiled at me, and I smiled back, trying to listen to him. He grabbed his coat before giving me one last lingering kiss, then opened the door, preparing for him to slip from my fingers again. And once I did slip from my fingers, I fell to the floor, numb.

"He's really gone."

~~~~~~~~~~

"Stupid doorbell..." The insistant ringing woke me up from yet another restless night of sleep, where all I do is turn over and wish I could fall asleep, but woke up in a flash, only to see my dresser staring at me, instead of his fading profile. For once, I didn't wake up from the same dream I dreamt every night. Even though my alarm was due to ring soon, I still wanted my extra few moments of sleep.

However, after the bell rang three more times, I pulled myself out of bed, resigning myself to the fact I would have to give the extra time of sleep. I grabbed the spare sweatshirt I threw over the bedpost last night before I strolled into the kitchen, yawning as I pulled the giant sweatshirt over my head. Throwing the cluttered paper into the garbage, then kicking the pillow off to the side, just in case whoever was at the door ending up coming in, I moved what I could in the few seconds I could spare, hoping to create the illusion that my apartment was clean. I yawned again before walking over to the door, kicking my shoes to the side before unlocking it and opening the door with a flourish.

However, once it opened, each hope in my body soared as my mind contradicted it, telling me I was still asleep, that it wasn't real. However, I didn't wake up when I reached for him, or when he pulled me in. I was still dreaming when he reached for my lips, murmuring my name lightly. I hadn't woken up when I placed my arms around his neck, pulling him closer than he had been as all those weeks went by slowly, each moment ticking by as if it had been a day.

"I'm really not asleep, am I?"

"No way in hell," he whispered into my ear, stroking my hair and holding my face within inches of his. "If you're dreaming, well..." He stole a kiss from me before answering; "I don't think dreams come this close to being so perfect." And with that, he captured my lips again, proving to me the truth of his words.

"So you're home for good?" Forgetting everything- from the neighbors to my now ringing alarm clock- I concentrated only on him, his answer, his face. My gaze never moved from his eyes as he smiled, and gave me his answer.

"Tell you what. I promise never to say these words again." He kissed me, then opened his mouth again, finishing his promise. "Darlin, I'm home."

~~~~~~~~~~

Unless I add something else, it's over with. So, there you go. The end. Glad? Anways...

Momiji-chan: Thank you!!!! And, I justify killing Tama because I respect him a ton, and I really can't see Miaka (whom I adore) without Tamahome/Taka. Too much love... And, once again, THANK YOU!!!

Phoe-kun and Leena: I had to start somewhere, and plus the fic is angsty enough... Why not base the chapter on Taka's death? That's how I put it... And I've been realizing I've put in too much angst... I need to find more than one chapter where Miaka doesn't cry... I think I've gotten good with angst... Rambling! But thanks! And winged cats have got to be cool... They can fly!!! And thanks!

Tamababymiko-chan: So, I kinda updated more than two months after I last did... Sorry! And it's Nuriko. **nod nod** but thanks!

ingrid (Who's review refuses to show up!!! Stupid website and it's breaking down...): I make myself give up time for typing, instead of doing my homework. I hate homework... It's a wonder I'm not failing all my classes... Aaaaaaaanyways... Galen is Tasuki... I should make a dictionary for the people... But thanks for the review (as I mindlessly ramble)!!!

Nadia: Thank you!!!! And the names are right. **nod nod** And I don't blame ya for liking Miaka and Nuriko... And the suspense I think was just so I could hopefully make people happy with their immagination, thinking Miaka was with Tasuki or Nuriko. Either that, or I was desperate for reviews... lol. And thanks you again!!!!

Dictionary (pre se...) popped into my head. People are very much confused about people, so...

Tamahome: Taka

Hotohori: Shane

Nuriko: I never named him, so I decided halfway through the chapter that his name shall be Ryder. **nod nod**

Chichiri: Hayden

Tasuki: Galen

Mitsukake: Michael

Chirko: David

So that's that. Anything else... Ahh... THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR EVERYTHING!!! And a special thanks goes to Izumi and Rui (sex on a stick pirate movie!!!), who I bugged for two weeks, trying to fit in every little detail I thought necessary... I need to bug other people... But, the chapter turned out orf-tastic, ne? Anyone going to disagree with that? So, until I put up something else in the FY section (hope to God it's not as angsty as this... altho I very much doubt I'll stray from angst...), bai bai!

~Frenchie

PS: I'm curious and nosy... Who saw Pirates of the Carribean and agrees with me that Orlando Bloom's hat from the end of the movie is cool? No one agrees with me...