Title: Numb

Author: Snowflakeangel01- xoboshoexo

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Third Watch cast.

Note: A short fiction piece surrounding around Bosco and when his life is destroyed in the flash of an eye.

I knew I should have worked beat car that day. A little voice inside my head was telling me to work with Faith rather then ACU with Cruz for the day, however, I ignored it.

Now everything is starting to slip away from me and I hardly know what is happening. I knew one thing though, I was shot, and me working in an office all day had decided not to bother wearing my vest. I didn't think we would be on a chase last minute, but that's what happened. I could see Cruz's shadowy figure kneel over me, a panicked distraught look coaxed her face. I tried to speak but nothing would come out. I wanted to ask her what had happened, what the hell was going on. I thought of Faith and my ma, desperately trying to catch Cruz's attention. She was too busy doing CPR to notice. I was numb.

For a second I swear she heard me screaming at her to acknowledge me. She stared at me for a second speechless. That's when she broke in to sobs, collapsing on my chest. She was acting as thought I was…dead? No. I couldn't be dead. I just couldn't be!  I was looking up at her, feeling nothing. Was this how it was like to be dead? It wasn't fair that I never got the chance to live, to live with no worries, to dream, to  help myself breathe and get though my own problems, and to tell Faith and Cruz what they had meant to me. And now, they will never ever know.

It's raining, pouring on my head as I look around the dank and dreary cemetery. I see a funeral service a few rows down and decide to see what's up. Letting my curiosity take over, I walk down the mushy groups and shiver thinking about all the deceased bodies I'm walking on. Pushing the disturbing thought to the back of my mind I walk behind a crowd of people all huddling under black umbrellas with there loved ones. That's when I spot her, she places a single white rose on to the wooden casket in front of everyone, tears falling down her cheeks. Fred died? When did this happen? I think to myself as I walk forward.

"Faith? What happened?" I asked in confusion as I approach her side staring at her. When she doesn't reply to me I touch her arm. Faith doesn't respond that I am next to her, why? Why doesn't she acknowledge me? When I look to the closed casket, I make out the name engraved in the top, surrounded my welted roses. Reading it three times in pure shock I whisper it out loud, "Maurice Boscorelli, Rest In Peace, Beloved Son and Hero?" I state more as a question. I couldn't be dead? What the hell is going on? This is some nasty trick! I spin around looking at all the familiar faces of people surrounding the casket.

"Ma?" I cry as a tear streams down my cheek as I watch my mother, Rose walk forward and place a rose on my casket. She's in hysterical tears with Mikey hovering by her side. "But no! No! Can't you see me! Ma? Faith? I'm right here!" I yell at them. Still no response. I run my hand though my soaked hair in frustration as Sully and Davis walk up together and place another two roses on the coffin.

The rain continues to pour down on us all. I watch as everyone begins to walk away, leaving me behind. Faith is pushed away to leave by Fred, his arm hooked around hers. I hear her weeping, "I can't… Fred, I can't leave him!" Eventually her muffled cries vanish.  However one person still hovers under a tree nearby staring at my lowered grave in the marshy ground. She twirls a rose in her hand silently and I swear I see a tear in her eye. Watching her as she walks forward she stands looking down at the grave in sympathy as she tosses a single black rose in with the others, falling on my name. I stare at her wondering what she's thinking. I swear again she looks at me but her gaze falls back to my coffin, and it all seems so familiar.  A single tears sails down Cruz's cheek as she turns on her heel and walks away into the distance.

Not knowing what else to do, I sit near my gravestone and wait. Wait for something to happen. I still feel so alive although I'm numb. Now I feel no emotion, no pain, no guilt, and no regret. But I don't feel happy either, just numb, as I sit there in the rain from the heavens, bathing my body. Everyone is gone now and nor I or the others, know what happens next.