Insanity on the Set, Please by NachoManLance

Disclaimer: I don't own Love Hina, lucky-dude Akamatsu does,.....God, how I envy him.....

Note: Well, got some positives, got some flames, no worries. Trouble is they keep reviewing my first fic, when that was done two months ago. Can we move on people? I mean I know it sucked, it my first fic and I never saw or read Love Hina! I mean, it's crap! Now is different, I actually own two LH DVD's. Nothing to be particulary proud of, but.....enough of the rambling, I'll get this shindig going.

Side-note to Talon: You somewhat proved a point,....all right. You have been promoted to Lord. But giving Kentaro hell.....*chuckle* just read on.......

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Chapter Three: Too Much Help

An hour later, the cast had taken a break of rehearsing and retreated to the kitchen where Shinobu and Talon had set up the buffet. They ate to their enjoyment and each was in deep conversation with the other.

"Say Naru, don't you ever cut your hair?" Kitsune asked from across the table.

"What? I just trimmed it a couple days ago..."

"What I'm saying is, you look better with shorter hair and maybe it'll fit for your part!"

At that point Naru stood and towered over Kitsune in a frightening manner,

"I WILL NOT CUT MY HAIR JUST FOR A STUPID MOVIE!!!" Naru stopped suddenly and looked at the silenced crowd around her. She blushed at Keitaro, knowing he would take that rather harshly.

"Not saying it's a bad thing....."

The crowd remained silent for a few seconds, and continued their conversations like it never happened.

"I hear Sarah might be here in a couple days, maybe she could be in the video!" Su told Shinobu, who sat next to her.

"It's really up to Sempai, he's doing the movie." said Shinobu.

"Yeah thats true, but the video wasn't the only reason why I'm anxious for her to be here."

"What is it then?"

"......You'll find out later."

Meanwhile, the boys (Lance, Talon and Keitaro) were all discussing possible ways to get rid of Kentaro.

"How did professional actors get rid of their directors?" Keitaro asked them.

"They sue," said Talon, "But we won't stand a single chance against Kentaro in that field."

"There's got to be some other way," Lance added, "Maybe by force?"

"The only way I see it is having Naru provoke him in a," Talon emphasized, " 'Kentaro-way'. But if we even try that Naru will send us to Mars and back."

"There is only one other way," said Keitaro, now whispering to the two, "But it will be tricky..."

After whispering his plan, Talon and Lance grinned in an almost evil way. "You are clever, my friend." Talon praised him. "I second that!" Lance agreed.

"Should we call them now?" Talon asked.

"That would be better if we do, I'll call them now." Keitaro stood from the table and left to the phone.

***

Another hour later, the work had started again and Kentaro had taken command.

"You over there," he pointed to Su, "Get these contraptions out of here and bring in some REAL equipment."

"Big meanie,...wait until Sarah gets over here." Su muttered under her breath.

Kentaro grabbed the megaphone and yelled at Talon, "You boy! Put on a better knight costume, with those rags on you'll wreck the camera!"

"WHAT WAS THAT?!?!" Talon glared at him angrily and made a mad lunge at him, it took Lance, Keitaro, Naru and Motoko just to hold him back.

"You just wait Kentaro, I'm going to make you miserable for this!" Talon struggled with his detainees, trying desperatley to be within htting reach of Kentaro.

"You know I could get you out of the picture with a snap of my fingers foolish one, so don't test me." Kentaro still had that sickening smile that always ticked everyone off.

"What are you talking about?!" Talon kept yelling, "This is Keitaro's movie, you stay out of it!"

"Tsk tsk tsk," Kentaro shook his head, still smiling. "I cannot allow this on my set. Escort this boy out of here."

At this point everyone had enough.

"You got to be kidding me!" Kitsune gasped.

"You little bastard, you know thats not fair!" Lance held up his fist in a threatening way.

Kentaro still smiled, "Fine then. You can both be left out as well."

Before anyone could get the chance to say a word, they heard the door slide open and close. Everyone looked up to see the two masters of prankery, Haitani and Shirai. They saw Kentaro, and instantly smiled.

"Well well, look who it is!" Haitani shouted, "Kentaro, the greatest movie director ever lived!"

"And his infamous cast!" Shirai added.

"We'll be happy to help you in any way, Sir Kentaro." They both bowed before Kentaro, who couldn't stop smiling. Kentaro forced a small chuckle,

"You boys would only make this picture worse. Get out before I call security."

"You don't have a security team!" Motoko yelled at him.

"Good point,...alright you two, you are hired as my security." Kentaro took out two badges that said 'Security' and gave them to Haitani and Shirai.

"Now, take these three out of here, and make sure they don't return." He gestured at Talon, Lance and Kitsune.

"Yes sir Kentaro sir!" they both cried in unison. With some slight trouble, they managed to take the three as far as the front steps.

"You traitors! You will pay for this!" Lance shouted at them.

"See you later, alligators!" Shirai opened the door, and then closed it loud.

After a few seconds of silence, all of the boys started laughing and had a hard time stopping.

"That was great acting, guys!" Talon choked out.

"Yeah, you should audition!" Lance exclaimed.

"Whats the matter with ya'll?" Kitsune asked, very confused.

"Keitaro called us up to help you guys get rid of Kentaro." Haitani managed to calm down. Except for Shirai, who kept laughing.

"Yeah, they're gonna make the film worse instead of having it his way." Talon added.

"How do ya'll plan on doing that?"

"You'll just have to-" Haitani had to stop to shut up Shirai, whose laughing was starting to irritate him.

***

Soon afterwords, Kentaro held his megaphone, ready to yell at someone. Haitani held the microphone while Shirai managed the camera. Keitaro was left to take care of raising the backdrop. Kentaro stood from the directors chair and yelled,

"Action!"

The scene of a happy grassland with lush plants and hills focussed, and Shinobu walked in front. She blushed in embarrassment as she said her first line,

"I wonder if Bunny Froofy will be here today.."

Just then Motoko in a large bunny suit 'hopped' on stage, looking like she would do anything to kill Kentaro and his wicked smile. With a droning voice, she said to Shinobu,

"I'm here Little Shinobu, let me spread my magic and make your life the most harmonious and joyful of all the little children of the world." Motoko took out a handfull of confetti out of a basket, and threw it over Shinobu.

"There, now we can all live happily ever after."

"CUT!!! That was wonderful girls, masterpiece!" Kentaro was streaming with pride.

Haitani tapped Shirai's shouldar, "Now." he whispered to him.

Shirai nodded, and dug his hand into his pocket. He took out two small bags, which were labeled 'Imported Himilayan Stink Bombs' and crept toward Kentaro stealthly.

"Masterpiece I tell you, you two were magnificant!" Kentaro was still praising their work.

Shinobu and Motoko noticed Shirai suspiciously walking toward Kentaro, and knowing Shirai, they figured that he was going to do something to Kentaro. So then they found a way to distract him.

"Oh please Kentaro-san, you flatter us." said Shinobu, pretending to blush.

"Yes, " said Motoko, "Certainly you don't think we're all that!"

"But I most certainly-WAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!" At that moment the stink bombs were let loose, and Kentaro was targeted 100% accurately. With a sob and clutching his nose, Kentaro ran out of the building, all the time screaming "DADDY!!!!DADDYYYYY!!!!!"

"Ladies and gentlemen, " Shirai shouted, "Kentaro has left the building!"

The cast cheered and whistled in appraisal, and the three fired actors were now back in business and ready to film.

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Yes, I'm kinda disappointed in this chapter. It was really stupid and it really didn't ake any fit with the story as I planned. So just consider it a filler, maybe if I get some positive reviews on this chapter I'll keep it on. And Talon, sorry I couldn't have you cause any michief to Kentaro, I had to find a way to introduce Haitani and Shirai into the fray. Don't worry, I'll find something for you to do :)

NEXT TIME: The movie moves on and a new character, Sarah McDougal joins the cast as a fellow traveler. But will they make it out without having Keitaro kill someone?