Title:

GIVE BACK OUR MEN!

Rating:

PG-13 [Bad language, sexual scenes, small lime, but no lemon]

Disclaimer:

The game, "Dead or Alive", does not belong to me or my cousin. We both do not own any of the characters that we are about to use.

Author Notes:

Finally, I have the second chapter to: GIVE BACK OUR MEN!

Thanks to all the people that reviewed. I'm actually surprised I got that much; I thought the fic was kinda lame at first. Oh well, no complaints here. Oh, by the way, I'm sure everyone knows dark venom. He flamed the fic and claimed that I stole this plotline from this anime show, Ranma ½, or whatever it's called. You can check out what I sent him on e-mail in the review section.

Enjoy the chapter and don't forget to review.


Chapter Two:

YOU'RE COMING WITH US! Part I

Two tall muscular men sat in a dim room, both facing each other. Their eyes glared at one another, piercing into the other's eyes.

I will win this one, BWHAHAHAHHAA!!! AH-my-eyes… so watery!!! Leon, one of the men said to himself.

Damn, I never thought a staring contest could make my eyes burn!!! Bayman tried his best not to blink. The two have been going at it for at for at least fifteen minutes and neither of them gave up just yet.

Soon tears began to come down their face, their eyes screaming for some shuteyes. Bayman and Leon could see in the other's eyes that it was red.

Good! Now- if- I- can- just- keep- it- up- longer... Leon thought as he was starting to literally cry.

I'll show him who's the big wiener!!! Bayman said, as both of the two grown men's eyes were starting to twitch.

ARGH, just a little longer!! Leon and Bayman both thought to themselves.

Right at the moment, the door slammed open making both of them blink from fright.

"NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!" Leon screamed as he pulled his hair and screamed to the top of his lungs.

"FFUUUCCKKK!!!!" Bayman cursed.

But he wasn't yelling about losing. To tell the truth, he was glad someone interrupted their contest. His eyes were so red, it looked like a tomato!

Drying his eyes with a pink hanky his mother had given him when he was young before they were severely slaughtered, he and Leon looked up to see Helena and Christie at the doorway.

The two girls' eyes were wide with shock as Christie had a pointing finger at Bayman's hanky.

Soon, the two broke into a fit of laughter, rolling on the floor, crying their hearts out.

"Oh my god!!! HAHHAHAHA, Bayman has- HAHAHAHAHA!!!" Christie tried to say through laughter.

Bayman's face turned a shade of neon pink as he blushed. Quickly putting the hanky away, he then heard Leon snickering in the background.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU LAUGHING ABOUT!!? YOU RETARD!!"

Leon just kept laughing. "Bayman with a PINK hanky? BWHAHAHAHHA Well I'll be darn tootin!"

Helena somewhat stopped her roar of laughter as she looked over at Leon slyly. "I wouldn't talk Leon, hehehehe, you have a pink teddy bear."

"SSSSSHHHH!!!!!" Leon screamed as Bayman and Christie began to roar with laughter again, harder this time.

"Is that true! BWHAHAHHAHA, you and a pink bear? BWHAHAHAHAhA!!!" Bayman asked, awkwardly on the floor, going round and round with his feet as he laughed.

Helena jeered, "Yeah!"

Leon glared at her before taking his pink teddy bear out. "You may think this is just an ordinary teddy bear but it's also a deadly weapon!"

Helena, Bayman, and Christie stopped laugh before the raised their eyebrow at Leon. Crickets chirped in the background as Leon looked back at the unemotional three. But then the three broke into laughter again as Leon sweat dropped.

But the muscular man who had a weakness for pink teddy bears gained control and growled at them. "I'll show you!!" He took his teddy, and before doing what he was about to do, he kissed it and hugged it and petted it. Then, unexpectedly to the others, he threw it hard, aiming it at Bayman.

Unlucky, Bayman was laughing too hard, he feel to his knee again, banging his fist on the floor, making the teddy bear swoosh over his head. But Leon's eyes went wide when he saw where it was headed to.

Helena was cracking up with amusement before she noticed the pink deadly teddy bear heading her way.

"Oh yeah, that's going to hurt," Helena though to herself until-

BBBBAAAAANNNNGGGG!!!!!

Christie and Bayman stopped, as they looked wide eyed at the blonde fighter. Leon also looked perplexed. But when the two assassins saw a huge red mark on Helena's forehead, they began to laugh again.

Leon, on the other hand, was sure he would wet his pants by the way Helena was looking at him. She looked like the devil himself as flames appeared in the background.

"LEEOOONNN!!!!" She screamed, making the room shake and the ceiling crack.

"HOLLY SHIT!!!" Leon yelled as he grabbed his coat and ran out of the room saying a quick, "thanks-for-the-invite-on-the-staring-contest-and-the-death-war-but-I-hear-my-mommy-calling-me-for-dinner-so-goodbye!" and was off in a cloud of smoke.

"COME BACK HERE, YOU BAKA!!!" Helena screamed, almost popping Christie's and Bayman's eardrums. Helena quickly dashed out of the room until Christie and Bayman looked out the window to see Helena driving away in her monster truck.

When she was out of sight, they heard "FUCK, STAY AWAY FROM ME!!!" in the far distance.

"Eh… that would be Leon, right? ... Damn, poor soul," Christie pitied.




Author Notes:

It's shorter than the first chapter but that's all I can think of now. Hope it made you laugh. And review please. No review means = no new chapter.

Dark Samarian has spoken