Title: Hidden Shadows Seeking Light

Rating: I wish I knew. I am putting it at PG-13 just because I don't know any better and would rather err on the safe side.

Genre: Drama/Mild Angst

Feedback: I would love to get feedback on this story. I would appreciate it if everyone would put down their flame throwers though because this is only my second time out and I know I made mistakes on the first story and have no doubt I will make many on this one. I need constructive criticism so that I will get better not mean comments that will only serve to make me cry. I thank each and every one of the readers who take the time to review this story. I love fan fiction and hope to write stories that can entertain others as much as their stories have entertained me.

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters in this story. They are, were and will always belong to Mr. George Lucas creator of an amazing universe. Not only does this story contain elements of the universe that Mr. Lucas created but also the Alternate Universe (AU) found in a wonderful story called An Untimely Frost by CYNICAL21.

Just to a little guide as to what things mean:

/-/ Bond thought //-// Private thought "-" Speaking aloud

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Qui-Gon shifted in his bed wondering how long it would be before sleep would finally claim him. He longed for some sort of escape from his own thoughts. Every time he closed his eyes he would see memories that he longed to forget. He could see the anguish ridden face of Obi-Wan standing before the Council when he had announced that he would take Anakin for his Padawan learner. He could see the shock and sadness in those familiar green eyes when he had pinned him up against the wall in their quarters when the man had come to do what? Qui-Gon realized he had never really ever taken the time to discover what it was that Obi-Wan had come to tell him that night. He had been too busy packing to leave the Jedi Order and defending his decision.

He had attacked Obi-Wan that night. He had pushed him against the wall and said hurtful words wanting to wound the man. He had wanted to push him far away, but why? The memory seemed hazy. It was as if it were someone else's memory. How could he ever have been so cruel to someone he cared about? Sighing Qui-Gon rose again and sat on the edge of his bunk. Sleep wouldn't come until he sorted out all these feelings he had avoided for over a year.

He made his way over to his meditation mat. Sinking into the familiar rhythm he reached out to the Force and felt it scream in around him. He could sense its near desperation to reach him to tell him something important. It was an unsettling feeling.

Qui-Gon began searching his feelings looking for what it was that the Force was trying to reveal. He found himself pulled involuntarily back through his memories.

He could see Obi-Wan as an initiate. He was fighting trying to impress him so that Qui-Gon would choose him to be his Padawan. He could see clearly now that it wasn't anger but desperation that had been driving the boy. It was in his eyes. They held the knowledge that if he failed before Master Jinn and because of his failure he would never be chosen and his dream of being a Jedi would end.

Qui-Gon could see himself as he watched the two youths battle. He remembered the odd feeling in the Force that he had felt watching the two boys. It was almost like a humming of energy surrounding him. He had tried to ignore it but something had been calling to him trying to push him into taking Kenobi.

Of course he had still been wearing what felt like fresh scars from the turning of his last Padawan. He had decided to come down to observe the initiates merely to get Yoda off of his back. The older Master had been insistent that he consider Kenobi. The boy was talented but nothing really sprang out at the Master except the odd humming energy that he found now in the Force. Now that he understood who Kenobi was he understood the disturbance in the Force. He felt suddenly humbled as he realized that he had been selected by the Force to train the Chosen One. He hadn't had to go looking for him. The Force had brought him to the Master.

Moving forward in time he saw the day that Tahl had died. Obi-Wan had slowed down his progress and prevented him from reaching his love, she had fallen. The pain was still intense as he saw Tahl rise up before him. She had left him a message begging him not to allow his grief to interfere with his relationship with Obi-Wan. He of course had refused to heed her warning and had managed to completely abandon him for a clone of Xani. A clone who was the perfect replica of his father even in his capacity for evil. Xani had proven this when he had framed Obi-Wan for the death of Tahl's clone. I just assumed that he was guilty. I naturally believed a child over the word of my trusted Padawan.

Looking back Qui-Gon realized how he had refused to see how he was hurting the boy. Why was it so easy for him to always assume the worst with Obi- Wan? He had never felt this way with Xanatos. He had always thought he was the perfect padawan. He remembered his utter shock to learn that the young man had turned to the dark side. He had felt betrayed and hurt. He had felt grief for the knight he had always pictured Xani becoming. It had taken him years to recover. Even now he could still hear Xani's voice teasing him about his seriousness. How could he still miss him and care for him when he had turned into everything he had been trained to reject?

Thinking of Obi-Wan again it was obvious to him why he had always assumed the worst. He would never make the mistake that he had made with Xani. In hindsight it should have been obvious that his Padawan was turning, but he had trusted the young man and assumed the best intentions. Obi-Wan had suffered from Xani's failings and from those of his Master.

Thinking back Qui-Gon could not remember one time when his doubts in the knight had been well founded. Always the first to look to the Force, always the one to stay focused on the mission and the well being of those they were sent to protect, always acting the perfect padawan, Obi-Wan had been what Qui-Gon had believed Xani to be. He was the personification of all the best qualities that a Jedi possess.

How could I have missed it? Qui-Gon asked the Force. How could I not have seen? The answer was there in his grief and longing. It was hidden in the shadows of his own defensive barriers. He had not seen because he had chosen not to. How could I have been so blind to Obi-Wan's light and Anakin and Xani's darkness? I am a fool. The Force rejected the man's conclusion reminding him of the pain he had been in and his need to have a second chance. The Force had chosen him to train its Chosen One.

After Xani fell, Qui-Gon had wanted to prove himself to the rest of the order. He knew that his past failure clung to him in the eyes of his peers. He had wanted to make a mark so that he wouldn't be remembered as the Master of Xani but the Master of the Chosen One. It was during his time with Obi-Wan that he had begun looking for the prophetic being. He had thought that he had found him on Tatooine, but now he realized that he hadn't. He found him or better yet the Force refused to allow him to miss him on Bandomeer. He smiled as he thought of the young boy so eager to please fiercely loyal to to point of giving him life to save the man who had rejected him. A lump rose in Qui-Gon throat. Obi-Wan had been a remarkable boy and had grown into an amazing man.

He felt a thrill at that thought as well as a swell of pride thinking about his Obi-Wan. Of course he hadn't been there to knight the young man but he had been there on Bandomeer. It was as if the Force itself wanted to give the grieving man a second chance. He felt a wave of gratitude. The Force rose and embraced him in return.

// I threw my chance away.// Qui-Gon thought but something in the Force filled him with the hope that he would have another chance yet. He would be redeemed. The generosity the Force afforded him was truly humbling.

Reaching out he tried to contact the Knight. He could feel the bond but it was too muted to actually communicate through. He chose to send his love and admiration in hopes that somehow it would reach the Knight. At the same time he reached to Anakin. Their bond lay completely still. He wondered if the boy was still being collared. He hoped not. There was not a more helpless feeling for a Jedi than to be cut off from the Force. He hoped the boy was ok. He felt better knowing that Obi-Wan was there to protect him.

Adi had been correct though. Obi-Wan would never turn in order to save the boy. He might play along with the Sith hoping to protect the boy, but Obi- Wan understood the dangers of turning. He would lay his life down before that moment.

The Force was trying to tell the old Master something. He opened himself further. It was in that moment that he saw it. He saw the moment when Obi- Wan would turn. He would do it without thought. He would do it not realizing. Once his actions came into light only then would the Knight realize that he was forever tainted. He would be lost in guilt and regret. He would be turned because of an act of love. The love he had for Qui- Gon.

Qui-Gon felt the tears on his face. He desperately sought a solution in the Force. "Help me." He cried aloud. "Help me save him." The Force was silent for a long moment before answering his plea with a question of its own.

"Would you die for him?"

Never before had Qui-Gon been so certain of anything as he spoke with the greatest of determination. "Yes."

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Yoda found Adi sitting at the table in the galley. He could tell that her thoughts were miles away, light years actually, so he approached her quietly and chose to sit down opposite of her and wait. It took a few moments for the Master to realize that she was no longer alone. Looking up she found Yoda studying her. She managed a small smile for the wise old Master.

"Your thoughts dwell on my Padawan I believe." He announced. She nodded staring back down at the cup of tea before her.

"Many thoughts you have. So much to think about." She nodded again.

"He won't turn." Her voice broke.

"Have him turn you would?" He asked. She shook her head steadier than her voice.

"No. I know it would be better for him to die than to turn." She paused gathering her resolve. "But once he is gone there is no hope."

"If turn he did no hope there would be either." Yoda stated emphatically.

"Master Yoda I know that you speak the truth, but the truth is not always an easy thing to accept." Her voice was barely above a whisper.

"True your words are. Hard it will be if my Padawan dies. Grieve him you will. But harder it would be for you if he turned. Hunt him down you would. Kill him you would have to. Grief is easier to bear when it is not combined with guilt." Adi bit her lip to stop its trembling. He was right and she knew it. Once they reached the Sith's ship if they did discover Obi-Wan, the Chosen One, turned to the darkness, they would have no choice but to pursue him and kill him. She wondered for a moment if she would have the courage to do such a thing. It would be hard for her and even harder still for Qui-Gon. Looking across the table she noticed the sadness in the small green Master.

"You are worried as well." She observed.

"Loved him I have. Always special to me he was. Even as an initiate found in my heart he was. Proud of him I am. Love him like a son I do." There were tears in his eyes and Adi could never remember seeing him laid so bare. "But kill him I would to save him from a fate of darkness and ruin." His resolve was there. Adi admired it.

"Perhaps your love for him is stronger than mine." She wondered. Yoda chuckled in spite of his grief.

"Lost possibilities are always harder to accept. Not only do you grieve the loss of what is but you would grieve the loss of what might have been." She nodded sniffing softly.

"Too early it is to say. Strong my padawan is. Hold out against the Sith he will. Knows he will that we will come for him." He reassured her.

"Maybe he doesn't know yet? He was injured and from what you said the Sith was an expert in dirty play. " Adi felt a chill run through her.

"Whether he knows or not, he will do the right thing when the moment comes. Trust him I do. Trust him you must if any hope you want to have. " She nodded smiling.

"He is an amazing person."

"If anyone can withstand the Sith it is my Obi-Wan." The Master rose patting the young woman's hands. "Sleep you must if ready to save him you hope to be. Catch them in a few hours we will. Ready we must be for whatever we find." Adi nodded and rose as well.

Only a few hours until they would be in a position to save Anakin and Obi- Wan, she couldn't wait. She wanted to find them and free them. She wanted to see him unharmed and unchanged. Only a few more hours, she told herself. She hoped it would be soon enough.

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Obi-Wan knocked on Anakin's door. When there wasn't any answer he called to the boy.

"Anakin are you alright? May I come in." The door slide open and the Knight was surprised to see the boy standing before him with eyes full of nothing less than rage. "Anakin?" He asked again in concern.

"What do you want?" The boy spat. "Haven't you done enough?" Obi-Wan shook his head. None of this made any sense. Surely the boy had indeed given himself over to the dark side if this was his reaction. Only earlier they had a pleasant conversation over dinner. Now the boy was obviously angry and sending out waves of pure loathing at the knight.

"I wanted to speak with. Qui-Gon asked that you and I have a talk about what you have been experiencing." He forced his voice to be firm but calm.

"You mean what I have been experimenting with right? I bet you are thrilled to hear that I am a lost cause. Did he tell you he wants you back?" Anakin turned and stormed deeper into his quarters. Obi-Wan followed hesitantly.

"Why would your failure bring me any joy?" Obi-Wan took a seat in a chair against the far wall. "And we both know that there is no way that I could ever be Master Jinn's Padawan. I am a Knight and he already has a Padawan." Obi-Wan smiled at the boy.

"He had one when he took me. What makes you think that he won't throw me away just as he tossed you aside." Obi-Wan felt his body stiffen as the painful memory of his abandonment was thrown back in his face. He pushed down the emotions the memory brought forth and pressed on.

"Anakin, Qui-Gon is very concerned about you. He loves you and risked his place in the Jedi Order so that he could train you. I don't see him walking away from you. He believes you to be the Chosen One." His voice was soft and soothing. The boy took a place on the edge of the bunk.

"What if I'm not? What if I am not the Chosen One? Then he will throw me aside and abandon me. I will never see my moth-" He lowered his head as his voice broke with emotion.

Obi-Wan stood up and made his way over to the boy's bunk. He sat beside Anakin and reached out to touch his shoulder reassuringly. "Anakin look at me." He spoke softly barely above a whisper. The boy waited for a long moment before he finally raised his eyes to meet the Knight's. Obi-Wan saw so much fear staring back at him that he felt overwhelmed. Sighing he smiled at the boy.

"Anakin, you have great potential. It is obvious that the Force is very strong with you. Your midichlorian count is very high. It is the highest ever recorded from what I understand. Whether you are the Chosen One or not matters very little. You are not being trained to be the Chosen One, you are being trained to be a Jedi. I have no doubt that one day you will be a Knight. If it turns out that you are the Chosen One as well then great go out and save the universe." He smiled. "In the meantime why not just focus on being Qui-Gon Jinn's newest Padawan. You will probably be his last Padawan as well. I have heard rumors that once your training is complete Qui-Gon will be asked to fill a seat on the Council."

He paused as he watched the boy take all the information in. "It is important then that you two enjoy this time. It is hard training to be a Jedi but I can testify that Master Jinn does an excellent job getting a student ready to face their trials. I understand also that he can be a bit difficult sometimes and distant but it is only because he has been hurt Anakin. He protects himself. He is human and he makes lots of mistakes."

"He is a liar." Anakin stated bluntly. "He is cruel and a liar." Obi-Wan started at the boy's complete belief that what he was saying was true.

"Why do you say this Anakin?" Obi-Wan asked placing his hands on the boy's shoulders and turning him to face him. Green eyes sought blue as he tried to fathom why Anakin could think so little of Qui-Gon.

"He could have saved my mother but didn't. He left her. We never went back. He could have saved her." The boy yelled lunging at the man. Obi- Wan easily locked his arms and held the boy at bay.

"Anakin he could not have saved her. We didn't have the money to buy her. He chose to save you. It was what your mother would have wanted. Had he chosen her she would never have left you behind. You would both still be slaves. He wanted to save you both. He couldn't. " He explained feeling the boy's pain as he watched tears streak down the boy's cheeks.

"He's a liar." Anakin spoke with less force a note of defeat evident in his loss of volume.

"Anakn?" He asked smiling slightly at the boy.

"He lied to you. He said he would see you through to your Knighting just as he has said to me, but he didn't. He lied to you." Obi-Wan felt the words sting but was amazed how much healing he had under gone in the last year.

"That is true Anakin he didn't keep his promise, but he didn't set out to break it. He knew that the only way that you would ever reach your potential was for him to walk away from me. He saw that you had more raw talent than I ever had---" Anakin burst into laughter.

"He's a fool. He's a blind fool. He had no idea." He laughed again the bitterness evident in his tone.

"You are very talented Anakin. If Qui-Gon had not chosen the path that he did, you would be a slave right now-"

"With my mother!" The boy screamed in anguish. Obi-Wan watched as the tears came faster. He had never known his mother so he had no idea what the boy was feeling. He knew that both times when he had lost Qui-Gon it had been devastating. He was the closest thing he had ever had to a father. He reach out trying to comfort the boy but found his hands slapped away.

"Don't touch me!!! He will go back to you. He has done it more than once. Throws you away then comes back and you forgive him. He will toss me aside now that he knows. He knows the truth now." Obi-Wan assumed Anakin was referring to the darkness.

"Anakin we are all concerned with what we know where you are involved, but it isn't too late. You can save yourself and I will help you in any way that I can. Ultimately though it must be your decision. Only you can decide who you will serve." Obi-Wan stood.

"Anchor yourself to the light Anakin. The dark side may seem quicker, but the cost is too high. I know it is hard to rise above feelings of anger, hate, envy, and revenge but as Jedi we must. We must serve the light. You can turn back Anakin it is not too late." Obi-Wan watched as the boy studied him intently for a moment. He thought for a moment that he saw a veil lift from his eyes. He felt the boy's hands cling desperately to him.

"Why would I want to kill you? Why would I want to kill my Master?" Obi- Wan shook his head in view of Anakin's frightening revelation. "Why Obi- Wan?" Anakin stopped searching his mind but nothing seemed to make sense. "Something is wrong here Knight Kenobi. Something is terribly-" He collapsed to the floor clutching his head. It was another attack.

Obi-Wan instinctively reached for the boy. Just as he entered his mind, Obi-Wan heard an echo of a fading voice. "Not a word. Not a word. Not a word." Obi-Wan reached for the bond and began trying to banish the pain from the boy's mind. He felt a surge of power as the Force flooded his body. It filled him and sent out a power wave pushing the dark attack away. In crumbled suddenly in the face of the bright light the Knight wielded.

Once Anakin was safe Obi-Wan opened his eyes. He found that he was now on the far said of the room cradling Anakin in his arms. He blinked a couple of times. Never had he ever felt the Force surge through him so completely. It left him feeling confused and exhilarated. He held Anakin closer trying to gage the boy's physical condition. He heard a low moan and was relieved to know that he was at the very least alive.

Picking up the boy he carried him over to his bunk. He pulled a blanket over him then wrapped his mind with a Force sleep suggestion. He began to think as he left the boy to return to his own quarters. He would need to go back periodically and check on him. What had Anakin said before the attack? Why would he be warned by the dark lord not to say a word? What secret was he hiding? It has something to do with harming Qui-Gon and himself. He had to get to the bottom of this. His first instinct was to track down the boy's Master and report what had occurred, but he still felt his instincts were suffering some after effects of the attack, so instead he chose another path.

It had been days since he had been able to truly meditate and open himself to the Force. He would go to his quarters and stay there until he got some answers. Reaching out as he saw the door to his cabin come into view he felt a momentary touch in his mind from Qui-Gon. He felt filled with the other man's comfort and affection. He basked in it for a moment. It felt so good. He must have realized that the talk with Anakin had not gone well.

As Obi-Wan settled onto his mat and began sinking into the Force, he realized that he had easily recognized Qui-Gon's Force signature in the corridor, but had not been able to earlier in the day. He felt encouraged that the effects of the attack were fading. Surely once he was back to full strength he and Qui-Gon would be able to help Anakin. Sighing he allowed the Force to come to him. With hard learned patience he waited for whatever the Force chose to reveal.

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Did they say hours before they reached the Sith? That is what Yoda said..well ok so maybe it will be more like a week but time really flies when I have a chapter to write. Thanks again to all my reviewers. Your thoughts really help me clarify in my mind areas of the story that are hard to get a handle on. Thanks.