Lily left for Christmas break with a heavy heart. She and Remus had
continued with their study sessions, but didn't have any more dates for
lack of Hogsmeade visits. Lily dreaded going home to her awful sister,
Petunia, and her harebrained boyfriend, Vernon Dursley. The two of them
were inseparable and had been for as long as Lily could remember.
Petunia hated 'Lily's kind', whatever that meant. Lily enjoyed chanting nonsense words to Petunia, watching her face pale and her grope for Vernon's hand. There was nothing in the world more that Lily wanted, rather than to prove herself to her sister. Petunia was always so prim and proper and Lily ached to bring home a friend from the wizarding world, particularly a boyfriend, to frighten Petunia and Vernon into leaving her alone. Chances of that happening were slim to none, for this was Lily's last year at Hogwarts and asking Remus home for the holidays didn't seem like such a good idea, what with James acting the childish brat that he could so often be.
James hadn't spoken nearly as bitterly towards Lily since that day in Hogsmeade. Believing it to be the work of her own backbone, Lily felt somewhat proud that she had frightened James into being nice to her. Whenever he would walk by her in the hallway, he would bow grandly and say, "Good day to you, Miss Lily Evans." Besides feeling exceedingly embarrassed, Lily couldn't help but feel her heart flutter every time he did it.
Much to Lily's joy, the Christmas vacation passed quickly. Vernon's family was leaving the day after Christmas to go to the Bahamas, so Lily was free of him for New Year's Eve. Petunia spent so much time in her room pining for her beloved Vernon that she barely noticed Lily was home. This suited Lily fine. She enjoyed spending the spare time with her parents, who drilled her with curious questions about her school, the train ride that she took, her studies and her friends.
"Any boyfriends yet?" her father chortled as they began to prepare for Boxing Day supper.
Lily blushed as her mother scolded her father for bringing such an idea into her head. "She's much too young yet, Harold. Don't give her any ideas." Cupping Lily's face in her hands, she told her daughter, "Lily, don't ever be in a hurry to grow up. It will never get you anywhere."
And it was with these words in mind that Lily boarded the Hogwarts Express for the first time of the New Year, with a much lighter heart than her last trip. The first person that greeted her was Brianna, decked to the nines with fancy clothing and jewellery.
"Mother and Father spent our savings on me this year!" she crowed and Lily simply smiled. It hadn't occurred to her how snobby and stuck up Brianna was becoming. But she was okay with that, because Kaylen was her best friend. She searched desperately for Kaylen as Brianna continued to chat about her Christmas, including several cute boys from home that she had been dying to bring back to school to show off.
"You'll never guess who I saw," Kaylen said when Lily finally scouted her out and they exchanged greetings. "James Potter and Remus Lupin! In Diagon Alley the day before yesterday! They were talking, laughing and having a good time."
Lily felt relieved that they were getting along again, but couldn't help feeling a little put out. She was the only girl in her dorm that came from a Muggle family and she often missed out on events such as seeing friends in Diagon Alley while doing Christmas shopping. Laughing, she pictured the look on Petunia's face if she had tried to bring her shopping in Diagon Alley.
The train rolled into the station and a rain that strongly resembled sleet drizzled from the grey sky. Climbing out of her compartment, Lily stretched. Riding the train was great, but you didn't want to stand up too long or else someone else would steal your seat.
"Oh no," Kaylen groaned as she climbed off the train. "Lucius Malfoy." She stood back as a white haired, superior looking boy passed by them, a triumphant look on his face.
"I've never seen him before," Lily said, watching him march up and down the platform. She instantly didn't like him, but was willing to at least be civil.
"You don't want to know him," Kaylen replied. "He's one of the last purebloods left in a long line of stuck-up wizards and witches. And he's greedy and slick, too. Never trust him or anyone like him. If you had gold teeth and you fell asleep with your mouth open, he would no doubt steal them."
Lily giggled at the mental image before following Kaylen up to the carriages that would take them back to the castle. She smiled as the looming building came into view, happy to be back where she truly considered home.
It was difficult trying to catch up on her work for the next few weeks. All of her studying sessions with Remus were postponed as she struggled to make her way forth. Finally, three weeks after vacation had ended, she met Remus in the library for a recap on Transfiguration.
"Happy Christmas, and Happy New Year," Remus said as Lily sat beside him. Grinning, she opened her books.
"Same to you. Did you have a good holiday?"
"About as good as can be when, well, yes it was good."
Lily wanted to ask why he hesitated, but she went against the instinct, also deciding against asking about James. If it were to be told, it would be done so in good time. They began to discuss certain aspects of Transfiguration for quite some time before Lily found herself looking up into Remus' eyes.
"I missed you," he told her in a soft voice. "It just didn't seem the same without you around."
"I missed you, too," she confessed. "I was going to ask you to come home with me for the holidays, but I didn't think it would be appropriate."
"I wish you had of," he said, looking back down at his work. "My family hasn't been the same since, well, they haven't been the same for a long time."
Curiosity peaked in Lily's brain, but she maintained her inquisitiveness, instead choosing to ask if Remus would join her on the next trip to Hogsmeade. "Professor Dumbledore told me that it will be just before Valentine's Day," she said.
"I would love to," Remus replied, but he didn't look as happy as Lily would have liked. For the rest of the session, he kept fairly quiet, only becoming talkative when discussing school. They dispersed soon after and Lily hurried back to the common room to seek out Kaylen. However, just around the corner from Gryffindor tower, she ran headlong into James Potter. Straightening herself up, she greeted him with a bright hello.
"Good day, Evans," he said, nodding slightly. The chilly tone in his voice that had been there the last time they exchanged words was gone and Lily found herself staring into his caring eyes. "How was your vacation?"
"Good," Lily said, looking down. "And you?"
"Great," James replied. "Sirius came with me; he left home a while back and has been living with me in between the school year."
"That's nice," Lily stated genuinely. "Well, I had better go." Her heart was pounding and she didn't want to let on how she was feeling.
"Good talking to you. Take care," James told her before walking away. Hiding her excited squeals, Lily dashed up the stairs to the tower where she found Kaylen and Brianna holding a rather loud conversation.
"You're wrong," Kaylen said firmly, standing from her chair in front of the fire. "Whatever you heard, Brianna, its wrong."
Brianna was sitting calmly in the chair beside the one Kaylen had just abandoned. "Whatever you say," she said, shrugging casually. "I know what I heard and I think you should warn her." Her eyes were diverted by Lily's entrance and the smug look on her face vanished. Glancing at Kaylen, Lily saw her shaking her head furtively at Brianna.
"Lily!" Kaylen cried, walking towards her friend. "How did it go?"
"Fine," Lily said warily, glancing at the two of her friends.
"How romantic," quipped Brianna. There was a note of concern as well as supremacy in her voice. "Kaylen, if you don't tell her, I will."
"You won't!" Kaylen cried, giving Brianna a dirty look. "Lily, let's go to the dorm." She began to ascend the stairs with Lily close behind her.
"You can run, but I live in the same dorm as you!" Brianna called, her voice floating up the stairs to meet them. "She's going to find out eventually, Kaylen!"
Once in the privacy of their dorm, Lily slammed the door. "What's going on?" she hissed at Kaylen, who looked somewhat taken aback.
"With what?" Kaylen said, sitting on her bed, examining the patterns on her bedspread.
"With Brianna."
"Oh, her." Kaylen went quiet for a few seconds before giving a sharp laugh. "She heard somewhere that Remus Lupin was a werewolf. Not that she believes it," she added quickly upon seeing the look on Lily's face.
"That's ridiculous!" Lily cried. "Where did she hear that from?"
Looking down at her bedspread again, Kaylen looked almost ashamed. "She 'overheard' James and Sirius talking."
"Well, they're lying." Lily's voice was defiant. "Remus is not a werewolf. After all, I think he would have told me. We'll be going on our second date soon!"
"You made another date?" Kaylen asked excitedly, her face suddenly looking happier. "What are you doing this time?"
"Hogsmeade again. But that's not important!" Lily felt herself becoming frustrated with everything and everyone around her. The prospect of being alone with Remus so close to Valentine's Day, James Potter's impulsive appearances, the fact that two of her best friends at school were keeping such strict information from her, plus all of her schoolwork was just becoming too much for her. "If Brianna doesn't believe what James and Sirius said, then why was she so adamant that someone tell me."
"I think she's just worried that you'll get hurt somewhere down the line," Kaylen replied, looking more than guilty.
"You believe it, don't you." It was more of a statement than a question and Kaylen's wavering eyes confirmed it. "You're supposed to be my best friend, Kaylen!
"I am!" Kaylen exclaimed standing up. "But you have to admit that he is pretty strange, Lily. Not that I don't like him, but he does disappear during the full moon of the month. We saw him leave through that secret tunnel one night."
"James, Peter and Sirius also left; does that mean that they're werewolves, too?" Lily asked bitterly. She turned away from Kaylen angrily. "I just can't believe you would take Brianna's side!"
"I haven't taken her side, Lily! I just don't want you to get hurt."
"I won't," Lily said, her voice insolent. "I have to go now. I can't be around someone who doesn't trust my boyfriend!" With that, she stormed out of the dorm and down the spiral staircase towards the portrait hole. Furious with herself for stooping to Kaylen and Brianna's level, but surprised at herself for calling Remus her boyfriend, Lily soon found herself outside the castle, heading towards the water. She was unsure of where to go, but she knew she would have to meet up with Remus at some point.
No more than five minutes after she had heaved herself at the ground, sobbing heavily, footsteps approached behind her. "Go away," she said determinedly, almost positive that the footsteps belonged to Kaylen.
"Okay," came the voice and Lily turned.
"Oh, Remus! I'm sorry; I didn't realize it was you." She wiped the few remaining tears out of her eyes. "I thought it was Kaylen or Brianna."
"Can I sit down?" Remus' voice was soft, yet unyielding. Lily nodded and he sat close to her on the ground. "What's the matter? Did you and Kaylen have a fight?"
"More like I had a fight with myself." Lily shook her head, her eyes filling with tears again. "I absolutely hate fighting with my friends! I don't have many to begin with, so I don't want to alienate the ones that I do have!"
"I'm your friend." He lifted her chin with his hand. "You'll still have me." He smiled gently. "What was the fight about?"
She found she couldn't turn away. She was tired of sneaking. "Brianna heard you were a werewolf."
Something in Remus' eyes flickered. He turned away from her, staring out over the water. Without words, Lily knew that it was true. Feeling she should back away, she found she couldn't. It was as if she were rooted to the ground.
"Don't be mad," he said. "And please don't hate me."
"I'm not mad at you! I just wish you had told me!"
"If I told you earlier, Lily, would you have stayed my friend?"
She sat up on her knees eagerly. "Yes. What you are doesn't change what I feel for you! Besides," she lowered her voice to a whisper, "I've heard rumours that Severus Snape is a vampire. So really, we're just a mix here."
Remus laughed. "So you still want to go to Hogsmeade with me?"
"Of course!"
He nodded. "Good. I'm really sorry I didn't tell you before, but I thought I would have scared you away."
"I don't think much could scare me away," Lily said, standing up, pulling Remus to his feet. "But I do have to go talk to Kaylen." The two of them headed off towards the castle, Lily in the lead. She felt satisfied, but something odd was picking at her brain. Even after she left Remus in the common room, bidding him a goodnight, she felt unhappy, like something wasn't resolved yet. Upstairs, Kaylen was already asleep, so Lily went to bed herself, determined to speak with Kaylen in the morning.
Petunia hated 'Lily's kind', whatever that meant. Lily enjoyed chanting nonsense words to Petunia, watching her face pale and her grope for Vernon's hand. There was nothing in the world more that Lily wanted, rather than to prove herself to her sister. Petunia was always so prim and proper and Lily ached to bring home a friend from the wizarding world, particularly a boyfriend, to frighten Petunia and Vernon into leaving her alone. Chances of that happening were slim to none, for this was Lily's last year at Hogwarts and asking Remus home for the holidays didn't seem like such a good idea, what with James acting the childish brat that he could so often be.
James hadn't spoken nearly as bitterly towards Lily since that day in Hogsmeade. Believing it to be the work of her own backbone, Lily felt somewhat proud that she had frightened James into being nice to her. Whenever he would walk by her in the hallway, he would bow grandly and say, "Good day to you, Miss Lily Evans." Besides feeling exceedingly embarrassed, Lily couldn't help but feel her heart flutter every time he did it.
Much to Lily's joy, the Christmas vacation passed quickly. Vernon's family was leaving the day after Christmas to go to the Bahamas, so Lily was free of him for New Year's Eve. Petunia spent so much time in her room pining for her beloved Vernon that she barely noticed Lily was home. This suited Lily fine. She enjoyed spending the spare time with her parents, who drilled her with curious questions about her school, the train ride that she took, her studies and her friends.
"Any boyfriends yet?" her father chortled as they began to prepare for Boxing Day supper.
Lily blushed as her mother scolded her father for bringing such an idea into her head. "She's much too young yet, Harold. Don't give her any ideas." Cupping Lily's face in her hands, she told her daughter, "Lily, don't ever be in a hurry to grow up. It will never get you anywhere."
And it was with these words in mind that Lily boarded the Hogwarts Express for the first time of the New Year, with a much lighter heart than her last trip. The first person that greeted her was Brianna, decked to the nines with fancy clothing and jewellery.
"Mother and Father spent our savings on me this year!" she crowed and Lily simply smiled. It hadn't occurred to her how snobby and stuck up Brianna was becoming. But she was okay with that, because Kaylen was her best friend. She searched desperately for Kaylen as Brianna continued to chat about her Christmas, including several cute boys from home that she had been dying to bring back to school to show off.
"You'll never guess who I saw," Kaylen said when Lily finally scouted her out and they exchanged greetings. "James Potter and Remus Lupin! In Diagon Alley the day before yesterday! They were talking, laughing and having a good time."
Lily felt relieved that they were getting along again, but couldn't help feeling a little put out. She was the only girl in her dorm that came from a Muggle family and she often missed out on events such as seeing friends in Diagon Alley while doing Christmas shopping. Laughing, she pictured the look on Petunia's face if she had tried to bring her shopping in Diagon Alley.
The train rolled into the station and a rain that strongly resembled sleet drizzled from the grey sky. Climbing out of her compartment, Lily stretched. Riding the train was great, but you didn't want to stand up too long or else someone else would steal your seat.
"Oh no," Kaylen groaned as she climbed off the train. "Lucius Malfoy." She stood back as a white haired, superior looking boy passed by them, a triumphant look on his face.
"I've never seen him before," Lily said, watching him march up and down the platform. She instantly didn't like him, but was willing to at least be civil.
"You don't want to know him," Kaylen replied. "He's one of the last purebloods left in a long line of stuck-up wizards and witches. And he's greedy and slick, too. Never trust him or anyone like him. If you had gold teeth and you fell asleep with your mouth open, he would no doubt steal them."
Lily giggled at the mental image before following Kaylen up to the carriages that would take them back to the castle. She smiled as the looming building came into view, happy to be back where she truly considered home.
It was difficult trying to catch up on her work for the next few weeks. All of her studying sessions with Remus were postponed as she struggled to make her way forth. Finally, three weeks after vacation had ended, she met Remus in the library for a recap on Transfiguration.
"Happy Christmas, and Happy New Year," Remus said as Lily sat beside him. Grinning, she opened her books.
"Same to you. Did you have a good holiday?"
"About as good as can be when, well, yes it was good."
Lily wanted to ask why he hesitated, but she went against the instinct, also deciding against asking about James. If it were to be told, it would be done so in good time. They began to discuss certain aspects of Transfiguration for quite some time before Lily found herself looking up into Remus' eyes.
"I missed you," he told her in a soft voice. "It just didn't seem the same without you around."
"I missed you, too," she confessed. "I was going to ask you to come home with me for the holidays, but I didn't think it would be appropriate."
"I wish you had of," he said, looking back down at his work. "My family hasn't been the same since, well, they haven't been the same for a long time."
Curiosity peaked in Lily's brain, but she maintained her inquisitiveness, instead choosing to ask if Remus would join her on the next trip to Hogsmeade. "Professor Dumbledore told me that it will be just before Valentine's Day," she said.
"I would love to," Remus replied, but he didn't look as happy as Lily would have liked. For the rest of the session, he kept fairly quiet, only becoming talkative when discussing school. They dispersed soon after and Lily hurried back to the common room to seek out Kaylen. However, just around the corner from Gryffindor tower, she ran headlong into James Potter. Straightening herself up, she greeted him with a bright hello.
"Good day, Evans," he said, nodding slightly. The chilly tone in his voice that had been there the last time they exchanged words was gone and Lily found herself staring into his caring eyes. "How was your vacation?"
"Good," Lily said, looking down. "And you?"
"Great," James replied. "Sirius came with me; he left home a while back and has been living with me in between the school year."
"That's nice," Lily stated genuinely. "Well, I had better go." Her heart was pounding and she didn't want to let on how she was feeling.
"Good talking to you. Take care," James told her before walking away. Hiding her excited squeals, Lily dashed up the stairs to the tower where she found Kaylen and Brianna holding a rather loud conversation.
"You're wrong," Kaylen said firmly, standing from her chair in front of the fire. "Whatever you heard, Brianna, its wrong."
Brianna was sitting calmly in the chair beside the one Kaylen had just abandoned. "Whatever you say," she said, shrugging casually. "I know what I heard and I think you should warn her." Her eyes were diverted by Lily's entrance and the smug look on her face vanished. Glancing at Kaylen, Lily saw her shaking her head furtively at Brianna.
"Lily!" Kaylen cried, walking towards her friend. "How did it go?"
"Fine," Lily said warily, glancing at the two of her friends.
"How romantic," quipped Brianna. There was a note of concern as well as supremacy in her voice. "Kaylen, if you don't tell her, I will."
"You won't!" Kaylen cried, giving Brianna a dirty look. "Lily, let's go to the dorm." She began to ascend the stairs with Lily close behind her.
"You can run, but I live in the same dorm as you!" Brianna called, her voice floating up the stairs to meet them. "She's going to find out eventually, Kaylen!"
Once in the privacy of their dorm, Lily slammed the door. "What's going on?" she hissed at Kaylen, who looked somewhat taken aback.
"With what?" Kaylen said, sitting on her bed, examining the patterns on her bedspread.
"With Brianna."
"Oh, her." Kaylen went quiet for a few seconds before giving a sharp laugh. "She heard somewhere that Remus Lupin was a werewolf. Not that she believes it," she added quickly upon seeing the look on Lily's face.
"That's ridiculous!" Lily cried. "Where did she hear that from?"
Looking down at her bedspread again, Kaylen looked almost ashamed. "She 'overheard' James and Sirius talking."
"Well, they're lying." Lily's voice was defiant. "Remus is not a werewolf. After all, I think he would have told me. We'll be going on our second date soon!"
"You made another date?" Kaylen asked excitedly, her face suddenly looking happier. "What are you doing this time?"
"Hogsmeade again. But that's not important!" Lily felt herself becoming frustrated with everything and everyone around her. The prospect of being alone with Remus so close to Valentine's Day, James Potter's impulsive appearances, the fact that two of her best friends at school were keeping such strict information from her, plus all of her schoolwork was just becoming too much for her. "If Brianna doesn't believe what James and Sirius said, then why was she so adamant that someone tell me."
"I think she's just worried that you'll get hurt somewhere down the line," Kaylen replied, looking more than guilty.
"You believe it, don't you." It was more of a statement than a question and Kaylen's wavering eyes confirmed it. "You're supposed to be my best friend, Kaylen!
"I am!" Kaylen exclaimed standing up. "But you have to admit that he is pretty strange, Lily. Not that I don't like him, but he does disappear during the full moon of the month. We saw him leave through that secret tunnel one night."
"James, Peter and Sirius also left; does that mean that they're werewolves, too?" Lily asked bitterly. She turned away from Kaylen angrily. "I just can't believe you would take Brianna's side!"
"I haven't taken her side, Lily! I just don't want you to get hurt."
"I won't," Lily said, her voice insolent. "I have to go now. I can't be around someone who doesn't trust my boyfriend!" With that, she stormed out of the dorm and down the spiral staircase towards the portrait hole. Furious with herself for stooping to Kaylen and Brianna's level, but surprised at herself for calling Remus her boyfriend, Lily soon found herself outside the castle, heading towards the water. She was unsure of where to go, but she knew she would have to meet up with Remus at some point.
No more than five minutes after she had heaved herself at the ground, sobbing heavily, footsteps approached behind her. "Go away," she said determinedly, almost positive that the footsteps belonged to Kaylen.
"Okay," came the voice and Lily turned.
"Oh, Remus! I'm sorry; I didn't realize it was you." She wiped the few remaining tears out of her eyes. "I thought it was Kaylen or Brianna."
"Can I sit down?" Remus' voice was soft, yet unyielding. Lily nodded and he sat close to her on the ground. "What's the matter? Did you and Kaylen have a fight?"
"More like I had a fight with myself." Lily shook her head, her eyes filling with tears again. "I absolutely hate fighting with my friends! I don't have many to begin with, so I don't want to alienate the ones that I do have!"
"I'm your friend." He lifted her chin with his hand. "You'll still have me." He smiled gently. "What was the fight about?"
She found she couldn't turn away. She was tired of sneaking. "Brianna heard you were a werewolf."
Something in Remus' eyes flickered. He turned away from her, staring out over the water. Without words, Lily knew that it was true. Feeling she should back away, she found she couldn't. It was as if she were rooted to the ground.
"Don't be mad," he said. "And please don't hate me."
"I'm not mad at you! I just wish you had told me!"
"If I told you earlier, Lily, would you have stayed my friend?"
She sat up on her knees eagerly. "Yes. What you are doesn't change what I feel for you! Besides," she lowered her voice to a whisper, "I've heard rumours that Severus Snape is a vampire. So really, we're just a mix here."
Remus laughed. "So you still want to go to Hogsmeade with me?"
"Of course!"
He nodded. "Good. I'm really sorry I didn't tell you before, but I thought I would have scared you away."
"I don't think much could scare me away," Lily said, standing up, pulling Remus to his feet. "But I do have to go talk to Kaylen." The two of them headed off towards the castle, Lily in the lead. She felt satisfied, but something odd was picking at her brain. Even after she left Remus in the common room, bidding him a goodnight, she felt unhappy, like something wasn't resolved yet. Upstairs, Kaylen was already asleep, so Lily went to bed herself, determined to speak with Kaylen in the morning.
