LV: O_o; What the HECK went through my MIND when I was writing this!? ; I have GOT to get that stupid song out of my head…

Aya: T_T Excuse her. She's ranting about that 'Shii's Song' flash thingie… Lyrics got stuck in her head and we're making a songfic for it… Beyblade style. ^^

LV: --; The link is , though I first found it on a site called "I-am-bored.com". You can listen to it while reading. It'll repeat a few times while you read because it's a short song.

Disclaimer: I don't own "Shii's Song" (don't know who does… Oo;) or Beyblade.

Notes to consider: It COULD take place in the 'Forever and Always' plot or separately, since it doesn't say how his mom dies here. But this takes place before the series. By days or weeks is beyond me. Oo;

Hope for the Heavy Heart

~

My twin pools of midnight locked with older gray-blue eyes before looking away.

"Grandpa…" I began, "I'm… going to take a walk." The elderly man blinked once and nodded.

"Sure, little dude. Just come back before dinner." I nodded once before heading out the door, closing it gently. Grandpa could be picky about how I exit sometimes, but I wanted him to know I was leaving to think.

I walked down the streets, heading towards the park. Sakura blossoms fell from the trees, painting the scene with a dreaming, almost surreal atmosphere. Couple were littered everywhere, snuggling and whispering to each other of their love.

And you know what?

It made my heart ache.

~

Wishing on a dream that seems far off

Hoping it will come today

~

I was always alone.

Even though I could be surrounded by hundreds of people, and even though I'd be mixing and mingling with as many as possible, I knew I'd be alone inside.

And yet, for years I woke up each day, hoping those days would end that day. That I'd meet people who wouldn't make me feel so alone.

It was foolish, since I made the same damn wish on a star every night. But I sincerely felt that, one night, they'd twinkle in acknowledgement, like they once did years ago.

Could I really be that desperate for understanding? For true friendship?

…For love?

~

Into the starlit night

Foolish dreamers turn their gaze

Waiting on a shooting star

~

Reality has harsh ways of bringing you back from La-La Land, I can tell you that. The last time the stars twinkled for me was the last night I saw my mother alive. The next day… she was gone. For good.

I often dream of things that every kid dreams. Y'know… greatness, being respected by my peers, fame, fortune…

But I also dream of things most kids my age haven't even considered… Seeing my split family together again, seeing my mother alive and well, not having the weight of a deathbed promise on my shoulders…

Life's harsh and I discovered that the hard way.

~

But…

What if that star is not to come?

Will their dreams fade to nothing?

~

But then, I remember the good times I had while they lasted. I remember the surprised, annoyed, and clearly amused look on my mom's face when I'd come home covered in mud and grass stains holding out a crisp, clean flower innocently. I remember how my family would always banter good-naturedly with each other, particularly my grandparents.

But most of all, I remember those wonderful last moments with my mom the night she died.

I sigh; those were the good old days, when all I had to worry about was just being a kid.

I look up at the sky, still absorbed in my thoughts.

~

When the horizon darkens most

We all need to believe there is hope

~

I blink in surprise. Did I just see something in the clouds? Nah, must be my imagination again. Like those weird lights I've seen coming from the old sword Grandpa has in the dojo. He says a dragon spirit named Dragoon rests there.

I wouldn't know. Then again, why would I? Not like this 'Dragoon' spirit could actually help me with anything besides a little faith…

A flash of white off to my side startles me as I see some guy wearing a scarf walk off, seemingly in a hurry. He doesn't even give me a glance. I doubt he even saw me.

Bah, well I don't like you either.

~

Is an angel watching closely over me?

Can there be a guiding light I've yet to see?

~

Okay, enough about Mr. 'I'm-too-good-for-anyone'. I don't even know the guy.

Back to me, here.

My mom always told me to follow my heart. That the strength of great men lies in the hearts of even the smallest child. I've always stayed true to this, always relying on my inner strength to pull me through.

Many think it's childish and naive, but they're the ones who assume that if numbers and science can't explain something, it shouldn't be able to work.

Do you have any idea how much those people annoy me?

Every time I hear that, though, I feel that I can't back up my beliefs. I haven't done anything to prove just how powerful a little faith can be.

It's like…

…part of me's missing, as odd as it sounds.

~

I know my heart should guide me but

There's a hole within my soul

~

I see a young couple walk by, the girl resting her head on the guy's shoulder. He's resting his on top of her own, an arm wrapped around her waist. I feel a dull, familiar ache in my heart as I turn away, willing the tears back.

As much as I hate to admit it, I am alone. I've never known how it felt to love someone like that. Ever.

I'm curious and scared at the thought. I want to feel the warmth of that kind of love… but I'm afraid of getting hurt, only for the pain of being alone to return… stronger than before, because I did feel the warmth of love… and lost it.

Should I or shouldn't I…?

It would be safer to just say no, to not appease my curiosity…

But I'm not about to live my life alone, watching every opportunity pass me by just because I'm a coward.

~

What will fill this emptiness inside of me?

Am I to be satisfied without knowing?

~

I stare up at the growing twilight determinedly. Though the same wish is in my heart, as always, this time, it feels… stronger. More resolute, yielding to no one.

"Stars above, glowing bright…" I whisper, eyes still set in steadfastness, "Please grant the wish I plead tonight…" I bow my head, a small smile playing on my face as I turn back home. Grandpa's gonna get worried if I stay out any longer.

Oh well, his heart's in the right place…

But if I had just stayed any longer…

~

I wish then for a chance to see

Now all I need desperately

~

Maybe I would've seen a single star twinkling in response to my wish…

Or a pair of cold crimson eyes watching me…

Ever so closely…

~

Is my star to come…

~

~End.

LV: T_T; I am NEVER doing something this stupid again.

Aya: ¬¬; HOPEFULLY, you mean. You tend to do weird things.

CL: Oo; And YOU'RE any better? You give Luna' the ideas!

LV: --; While they're busy… just review. I don't know what came over me, so don't ask.