Chapter 8

Angel was waiting until Buffy was alone so he could talk to her. He found her upstairs in one of the rooms. "Hey, how are you feeling?" She shrugged.

"Okay, I guess. Just a little headachy." Angel nodded and sat on the bed next to her.

"Buffy, I need to talk to you about Spike." Buffy rolled her eyes; she saw a lecture coming a mile away.

"Angel, we've been through this. I told you that Spike and I are friends even if you don't exactly like that, it's just how it is. Nothing else has happened." Angel shook his head.

"I know that, I wanted to talk to you about something else. I saw you guys outside and I may have overheard your conversation." Buffy smiled.

"You know, eavesdropping is beneath you." Angel smiled also.

"Yeah, I feel so terrible about it." Buffy laughed.

"I bet you do, so what exactly did you hear?" She asked him.

"His whole speech basically. Was it true?" Buffy looked down and nodded.

"I didn't even realize I was doing it until he talked to me. I knew that I was going out a lot more these days and that I may have been a little more careless with the slaying, but I guess I didn't realize why. It's weird how much Spike knows about me. I think he even knows me better than I do." Angel nodded.

"Yeah, I see how he cares about you. I have to say it's a little weird." Buffy looked at him.

"Someone caring about me is weird, gee thanks. I'm feeling so loved right now." Angel shook his head.

"No, that's not what I meant. I just meant that the care coming from Spike is a little weird. I mean I saw how he was with Drusilla, but it's different with you." He told her.

"How different?" Angel looked at her.

"Spike will probably kill me if he knew that I was talking to you about this, but I never did care what he thought. I don't know if he's talked to you much about his human days, but when Spike was human he loved this girl with everything that he had and she basically wanted nothing to do with him. That eventually is when Dru decided to turn him and bring him to our side. From that day on I don't think that he's really loved anything else, until he met you. I guess I could relate to that. Anyway, I think I've seen it for a long time now and so did he, but I guess neither one of us wanted to admit it. I'm surprised he actually had the guts to." Buffy looked down then back up at Angel.

"What about Drusilla? I saw them together and it looked like he loved her to me." Angel shook his head.

"I don't think it was ever love. She turned him and they were connected after that, but I don't think he ever really loved her. I know that he wanted her and needed her because I think in a way he didn't want to be alone. Which I could understand, that's exactly how I felt after I got my soul." He looked at her when he was finished.

"Are you saying that you think Spike has a soul?" Angel shook his head.

"No, he obviously doesn't have a soul. I'm just saying that sometimes he seems like he does. He's not like any other vampire we've ever met. Unlike me, he's capable to care and to love without a soul. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I wish I could be more like him." Buffy smiled.

"It wouldn't hurt, but we just have to keep you miserable and then all will be good." Angel smiled back at her.

"Yeah, sounds like a plan. I also wanted to tell you that what Spike said was right. You have to go on living, Buffy. Let's just say that the world wouldn't be the same without you." Buffy hugged him.

"Is that a fact?" Angel kissed the top of her head and just held her.

"It's a promise."