~DISCLAIMER~ I don't own any of this. It's really too bad, but other people are just smarter than me to come up with it sooner! Enjoy my strange concoction of plots that aren't mine!
NEW CHARACTERS
Oliver Wood Oliver is a member of the Gryffindor House of Hogwarts in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. He's also Keeper and Captain of the House Quidditch team. And played by the DELICIOUS Sean Biggerstaff!
Harry Potter Harry is a renowned wizard and he's only in his first year at Hogwarts! In Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, he proves his worth both as a wizard AND as the Seeker for Gryffindor's Quiddtich team.
Agent Zed Zed is in control of the Men in Black, the elite organization to fight alien crime in Men in Black 1 and 2. The MIB have no real identity and no one knows they exist.
Coach Kreeton Coach Kreeton is the miserable and extremely bitter coach of Dullmont Junior High School. A character on All That, he is one of the principle characters played by the comedic genius Kel Mitchell.
Dumbo In Disney's animated Dumbo, Dumbo is a young elephant with the ability to fly using his oversized ears as wings. He cannot speak but communicates through his mouse friend, or, in my story, through writing things with his trunk.
Jar Jar Binks Jar Jar is the comic relief in Star Wars Episodes 1 and 2. He is a native of the planet Naboo and later becomes the diplomatic representative of Naboo in the Old Republic's Senate.
Lester Burnham The themes of American Beauty include drug abuse, adultery, lust, and dysfunction. And Lester is in the middle of all of it. He senses his wife growing away from him (and towards a Real Estate tycoon) and his life slipping away.
Peregrin "Pippin" Took One of the four hobbits in the Fellowship of the Ring, Pippin is the innocent and a bit naïve one of them all. From a place called the Shire and the movie Lord of the Rings, Pippin is close friends with his cousin, Meriadoc Brandybuck.
Meriadoc "Merry" Brandybuck Also from Lord of the Rings and the Shire, Merry comes up with the plans that get Pippin into trouble. The two are hardly ever seperated and Merry accompanied Pippin and his cousin Frodo in the Fellowship of the Ring.
Superdude The teenage superhero of the world of All That, Superdude has super powers that set him apart from…well, normal people at least. Superdude is a character made famous by All That's Kenan Thompson.
Stitch Originally, experiment 626 was to be exiled to a desert planet. But the little blue alien escaped in Lilo and Stitch and fled to Earth. There, a little Hawaiian girl adopted him and named him Stitch. But he hasn't lost all evil tendencies…
Mini Me Dr. Evil, a sinister, uh, mastermind in Austin Powers The Spy Who Shagged Me created Mini Me as his clone. Dr. Evil favors the clone over his own son, Scott, for Mini Me is more evil.
OTHER THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND
Oliver Wood Oliver also speaks in an accent – Sean Biggerstaff's real Scottish accent. (Author's Note And his accent is GORGEOUS!!)
Harry Potter Harry has a British accent.
Coach Kreeton If you've never seen the show, Kreeton has a gravely raspy voice and screams "DIE" often. At least, I think it's die. It could just be "DAH." He is old, bald, and missing a tooth.
Jar Jar Binks Jar Jar has a Jamaican accent and a high and annoying voice.
Peregrin "Pippin" Took Pippin speaks in a slight Scottish accent – actor Billy Boyd hides most of his strong Scottish brogue.
Stitch Very hard to describe. If you've seen the movie or previews, you'll understand. If not, imagine Stitch's voice however you think a space alien should sound!
Mini Me Mini Me has a very high pitched voice and never speaks. At least, not real words. He shreiks a lot though.
ALL FALLING FROM THE STARS LIKE RAIN Chapter 2
*At the Beast's castle, unaware of the impending attack*
*On a large field by the castle under sports lights*
Oliver: Ok, here's the deal.
*he faces a line of 10 people/creatures*
Oliver: As Hogwarts seems to have disappeared and my Quidditch team with it, I must build a new team. You ten have all expressed interest in playing for my team. As I am still keeper and Harry –
*Harry waves to the line*
Oliver: – is still seeker, we need three chasers and two beaters. That's five positions. So half of you will make it.
*all ten look apprehensive or lost*
Oliver: Starting at the right end of the line, state your name and something you think will help you to play Quidditch. Ok, go ahead.
Agent Zed: Hello. I have no name and no identity, but people call me Agent Zed. I run a top-secret organization that monitors and controls Alien activities on Earth.
*puts on sunglasses*
Zed: We are the Men in Black!
Harry: Uh…all right then. Next!
Coach Kreeton: Die! I'm Coach Kreeton!
Oliver: Ok…can you tell us anything about yourself.
Coach Kreeton: I coach the little DEVIL SPAWN at Dullmont Jr. High School and I live a sad, MISERABLE LIFE!
*silence*
Coach Kreeton: DIIIE!!
*runs off the field and accidentally over a cliff*
Coach Kreeton: Ahhh!
*Harry, Oliver, and the other potential players grimace*
Oliver: Uh…ok. Well, I guess that rules him out. Next?
*Dumbo can't talk, only writes with his trunk in the dirt*
Dumbo: I'm Dumbo. I can fly on my own because I was born with such huge ears.
Harry: Wow!
Oliver: That's very good to know, thank you.
*Dumbo nods*
Jar Jar: Meesa Jar Jar Binks!
*Harry glances skeptically at Oliver*
Oliver: Hello Jar Jar. Where are you from?
Jar Jar: Meesa from the planet Naboo! Weesa Gungans live underwater in big cities.
Oliver: That's, uh, great.
Jar Jar: Yessa, Naboo es a very pretty planet, with birds and trees and –
Harry: Uh, thanks Jar Jar. Next!
Lester: Hello. I am Lester Burnham. I think I may be lost.
Oliver: Lost? You're at a Quidditch tryout.
Lester: Oh. Well, as long as that Prince of Real Estate dork isn't here screwing my wife, I should be fine.
*Oliver and Harry share a look*
Oliver: All right! Thanks Lester!
Lester: No problem. It was my pleasure.
Pippin: I'm next!
Oliver: *laughs* All right. What's your name?
Pippin: Peregrin Took. But on one calls me that.
Harry: Well then, what do they call you?
Pippin: Just Pippin. I'm from the Shire! My da's the Train of Tuckborough and I helped Merry's cousin destroy evil!
Merry: That's right! We both did. Although, we haven't really been with Frodo since Amon Hen where we were captured and he left the Fellowship to go to Mordor alone, but we helped him get there! We were with him all the way from –
*Oliver holds up a hand*
Oliver: So you must be Merry?
Merry: Yep! Meriadoc Brandybuck to be precise. My da's the Master of Buckland. I've never played a Big People's sport, but I'm sure I could learn.
Harry: Big People?
Pippin: Oh, that's just Hobbit slang for Humans, Elves, and Maia – the taller races.
Harry: *quietly* Riight…
Oliver: *glares at Harry* Thank you, you two. Who's next?
Superdude: I'm next. I'm…Superdude! The teenage superhero with the powers to try out for a Quidditch team. I can balance on broomsticks high in the air, I can be hit by small leather balls moving by themselves, and I can work well with others! *soft tender music plays* I also enjoy climbing trees and petting puppies and singing nursery rhymes!
*from over the cliff*
Coach Kreeton: Die Superdude, DIE!
Oliver: Uh, very good, Superdude. Next.
Stitch: STITCH!
Harry: Stitch? Is that your name?
*Stitch nods*
Stitch: Stitch is evil space alien! Stitch has six legs!
Zed: *into collar* Unauthorized space alien here, need a response team immediately!
Stitch: No! Stitch doesn't want to leave! Stitch wants to play Quidditch!
*Oliver steps between Zed and Stitch*
Oliver: Enough! Unauthorized or no, Stitch stays here to try out!
Zed: *begrudgingly* Fine. But this is a major breach of protocol!
*Agent Zed glares as Oliver moves on*
Oliver: And who's next?
Mini Me: Eeeeee!
*Stitch growls at Mini Me, who growls back*
Harry: *frustrated* ENOUGH!
Mini Me: *written in the dirt like Dumbo* Mini Me. Clone. Evil.
Oliver: All right then! Uh, Harry and I are just going to talk. Why don't you nine practice handling the Quaffle a little and avoiding the Bludgers, ok?
*nine wander to where three Quidditch balls rest*
*two Bludgers shoot into the air*
*Oliver and Harry are left alone*
Harry: They scare me. Not at all like the old Gryffindor players. What happened to us?
Oliver: I don't know. But I think we disappeared as opposed to Hogwarts.
Harry: Yes, definitely. So it's only a matter of time before Dumbledore finds a way to bring us back, right?
Oliver: I suppose. But now we need to choose new Quidditch players.
*Oliver glances at the players*
*Mini Me tries to bite through the Quaffle*
*Stitch bites through a bludger and it sinks to the ground*
Oliver: *with raised eyebrows* I think that the little blue thing will make a fair beater!
Harry: Should I add him to the roster?
*Oliver nods, still watching the team*
*Harry makes a note on a clipboard*
Oliver: *sighs* Only four more positions to fill.
