(O_O Wow. I'm BAAAACK! I wonder if anyone remembers this fic at all. -_- No matter! ^_^ Enjoy and read as though this I never gone, kay? ~.^ ENJOY!)

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh. I only own a computer and a lot of junk. I wish I owned a cat. I would really like it if I owned Yami Yugi. Ummm...yeah.

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Britany: Hello and welcome back to Pet Peeves, everyone's favourite gameshow! (No guarantees) This show hasn't aired for what, a year?? -.- No matter. Onto the show! This week we have Bandit Keith, Serenity Wheeler, Yugi's Grandpa and Isthar Malik! *as usual, everyone is sitting behind her on chairs* Would everyone please introduce themselves? We'll start with Bandit Keith!

Bandit Keith: Eh. Well I'm the world's best dueslist...*many people cough* And I'm the best at everything else, too!

Brittany: You'll have to invite me to a ballet recital one of these days. You do ballet, right?

Bandit Keith: Of course, I'm the best at every- Hey, you tricked me!

Brittany: Idiot. Serenity?

Serenity: *is wearing dark sunglasses and holding a walking stick* Well, I'm Serenity...*waves at the wall* and I'm blind. *sniff*

Brittany: Whaaaat? I thought Joey won that money from the Duelist Kingdom tournament for you?!

Serenity: Ha! That greedy pig? No, he goes and buys himself a house of solid gold! And he just leaves his poor, defenceless, to-be-blind sister behind like a rag doll! *begins openly sobbing*

Brittany: What a jerk! *pulls out her cell phone, talks into it furiously, then puts it away again*

Everyone but Serenity: *crying for Serenity*

Serenity: *grins and takes off her sunglasses and tosses her stick away* Heehee, I'm not blind, I'm just kidding you! ^_____^

Brittany: *blinks* Um...you, uh...might not want to go see Joey for a while...

Serenity: Why?

Brittany: *blinks nervously* Um, now onto Yugi's Grandpa! Do you have a name, by the way?

Serenity: But- *is shushed by Brittany*

Grandpa: It's Solomen, but you can just call me Grandpa. Some people call me Jii-Chan, I guess that's my japanese name. *shrugs*

Brittany: Okay then. Malik, why don't you tell us a bit about yourself?

Malik: Geez, can't you *$(%^#' tell them for yourself?

Brittany: No. And stop swearing, it's too much work for our censors.

Malik: &%^($ you.

Brittany: *grins evilly* Now, according to this agreement you signed, two swear words equals trouble for you! *waves the agreement*

Malik: Whatcha gonna do, you @&)%#*?

Brittany: *laughs insanely* Watch me! *grabs the Millenium Rod and drops it in a snake pit*

Malik: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I NEED THAT TO KILL! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *jumps in the snake pit, only to be pulled up again by one of Brittany's guards*

Brittany: Those are poisonous snakes. You don't wanna go in there.

Malik: *grumbles*

Brittany: Now, for the last time tell us about yourself!

Malik: *growls* Fine. Well, from what you know, I'm an egyptian, blond, homicidal maniac with a sister named Isis. And I have a motorcycle. GOOD ENOUGH?! *twists out of the guard's grasp*

Brittany: Very good. *looks at the parking lot outside, where some goons are ready, standing around Malik's motorcycle with crowbars in hand* Excellent! *cackles evilly* Now, onto the show! Idiot, choose a door.

*four doors appear out of nowhere*

Bandit Keith: Who are you talking to?

Brittany: -_-;; YOU!

Bandit Keith: But I'm not a - *gulp*

Britany: *wags a cobra in front of his face*

Bandit Keith: Door...number...*gulp* four?

Brittany: *reads her cue card* Which is a...*giggles* leprechaun.

Everyone except Bandit Keith: *falls over laughing*

Leprechaun: *hops out* Always after me Lucky Charms! (I do not own Lucky Charms! -_-)

Bandit Keith: Um. I guess it's not too bad, at least I can get it to give me some gold...Leprechaun! Give me your pot of gold!

Leprechaun: *stares blankly* You want some?

Bandit Keith: Yes, yes! Give it to me!

Leprechaun: *throws a can of Bean-O in Bandit Keith's face*

Eveyone but Bandit Keith: *laughs hysterically*

Brittany: The nature of that frightens and disturbs me. *blinks* Serenity, please choose a door.

Serenity: Um...I guess I'll take number two.

Brittany: Well, well. You've chosen a sponge. These pets keep on getting weirder and weirder...

Serenity: Ah, well. They're not that hard to take care of, are they?

Sponge: *bares teeth and growls*

Everyone: O.O Sponges have...teeth? O__O

Brittany: *coughs loudly* Erm, Grandpa, choose a door, please!

Grandpa: Hmm...Door number one, please.

Brittany: *opens door, revealing a toad* O_O That's very...erm, nice...*walks over to pick it up*

Toad: *Inflates itself to an insanly large size and begins screaming* EEEYAAACK!! .O

Brittany: O____O AAAH! *runs around screaming*

Grandpa: O.O *gulps*

Toad: *hops out of studio, still screeching*

Brittany: *blinks and regains herself quickly* Ahem. Sorry about that. And er...to make up for the lost pet, uhm...*hands Grandpa a plush version of the Dark Magician*

Grandpa: Er, thank you.

Brittany: Consider yourelf lucky. Most of the people on here would give anything for one of those instead of...*looks over at Bandit Keith's leprechaun, which is now hitting him over the head with a deformed piece of cheese* -.- Anyway!! ^_^;;;;;; *sweats* Now! Malik, you get the last door, which is...*reveals door* A...monkey?? O___O Huh??

Malik: *starts swearing profusely*

Audience: *laughs*

Malik: SHUT UP!!!! *dives into the cobra pit, grabs his Millenium Rod and starts sending random people to the shadow realm*

Brittany: *dives out of the way as the first couple shots were sent intentionally her way* Eeeeep! ;_; My bad for bringing him on the show!

*chaos ensues, as people dive in piles out the doors, and Malik manages to bring the murder count up to 50 in three minutes*

Brittany: O___O *snaps her fingers, causing her, Grandpa and Serenity to disappear from the studio and land in the Motou game shop*

Serenity: *lands on her behind* Owch! _-

Grandpa: Oooff....

Serenity: Erm, aren't we missing that...blonde guy...what's his name...Bandit Keith?

Brittany: Yep. Got a point?

Everyone else: *sweatdrop*

Brittany: *blinks* Erm, anyway...It seems the set is destroyed. Any new episodes will have to be shot...*looks around*...elsewhere.

*Yugi and co. rush in, being chased by a vicious-looking cat*

Yugi: AAAH! CUDDLES, WATCH WHERE YOU AIM THOSE CLAWS!!

Brittany: *blinkblink* Er, hi Yugi.

Yugi: *blink* Hey, you're that lady who gave me this cat! ^_^

Yami Yugi: *comes out of puzzle and leaps on Brittany* Take this stupid cat back already!!

Brittany: *pushes him off* Come on!!! I thought you egyptians loved cats!!

Yami: *sneezes* I'm allergic. -_-*

Brittany: o.O Ah. *looks around while clearing her throat*

Serenity: Hey, where's Joey? Shouldn't he be with you guys?

Tristan: *holds up hs pet rock* Rocky saw these shady-looking guys carry him off!

Rocky: ...

Brittany: o___O Erm, uh, I have to go now. Um, bye!

Yami: *grabs her arm* YOU'D BETTER TAKE THAT CAT WITH YOU!!

Serenity: *is on the verge of tears* W-where's J-Joeeey?!

Yugi: *has managed to tame Cuddles so that she won't try to bite his hand off at his every movement*

Rocky: *cough*

*everyone stops to stare*

Rocky: Piteous mortals. Have you no shame? And you, strangely-haired boy! *turns on Tristan* Degrading me to one with the same haircut! You make me SICK. *spits at Tristan*

Tristan: *blinks*

Brittany: *takes the opportunity to hop out the window*

Yami: AARGH! GET BACK HERE!! *hops out after her, sneezing loudly as he goes*

Everyone else: *sweatdrop*

Brittany: *running for her life* We'll end the show *wheeze* here, before I get *wheeze* killed!! Review, *pantpant* and see if you can come up with a character who hasn't *pant* been on the show yet so I can *wheeze* write more! Byeeeeeeee~! *trails off as she runs into the distance, Yami after her screaming bloody murder*

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*Credits are rolling* Thanks to Minoa and Sarah/Celebi and EVERYONE ELSE for information and links to information about Malik! And also, basically, everyone who reads this! ~_^ Luv ya all! *huggles*

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A quick note...

Sorry if this isn't as funny as my previous ones...I haven't written like this for a long time! -_^ But I already had this chapter half-written from a long time ago, and decided I should finish it. Tankoo!