DD: Hi everybody. Me and BL are back with yet another fic!
BL: Yep this time it's a FFVII one and it's about the misadventures of the FFVII crew.
DD: hence the title.
BL//chasing Sephiroth/ the first one's about you! The first one's about you//Repeats for a really long time/
Sephiroth: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! GET HER AWAY! LEAVE ME ALONE! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
DD: so you all know Sephy here has a terrible fear of BL.
Sephiroth//still running and Cloud is laughing his ass off/ SHUT THE FUCK UP//takes out masamune and cuts Cloud's hair off/ HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
BL//falls over from intense laughter/ HAHAHAHAHAHAHA you look dumber than usual.
Cloud: ;; /runs away crying/ my hair my big spiky hair
DD: speaking of hair that's what the first chapter is about.
Sephiroth//instantly stops laughing/ what are you gonna do to my hair /starts paniking/ don't hurt my hair
BL//evil smile/ yea Sephy we're gonna turn it /wispers in his ear/ blonde
Sephiroth: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH /BIG BREATH/ AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH /runs away/
DD: now look what you did
BL: as you know we're not really gonna turn his hair blonde.
DD: I know. Cuz then I'd have to kill you.
BL: ok...let's get on with the fic, Cid do the disclaimer.
Cid: deamondragon and thegreatblsama don't own fucking FFVII, so don't fucking sue them, CUZ THEN YOU ARE FUCKING STUPID! Okay, bye.
The Misadventures of the FFVII Crew: Chapter1
Sephy and the Knot
Sephiroth was taking a LONG VACATION in Costa Del Sol and was running his fingers through his silky beautiful hair when his hand got stuck and couldn't go through to the end of the strands.
Sephiroth//tugging slightly at his hair/ what?...what is this?...why can't my hand go any further?...AHHHHHHHHHHH..this must be the work of some demon or worse...Cloud
Tifa is also on a LONG VACATION and heard Sephiroth scream...from the Gold Saucer. She gets on a bike and rides over to Costa Del Sol and goes into the inn where Sephiroth is staying.
Tifa//sees Sephiroth on the couch crying/ ummm...what's wrong?
Sephiroth//tries to run his fingers through his hair and gets stopped...again/ see it won't go any further. It's the work of your deranged boyfriend
Tifa: first of all he's not my boyfriend, just a guy that wishes and next he's not smart enough to think of something like that. Lastly you just have a knot.
Sephiroth: knot...what is this "knot" you speak of?
Tifa: ummm...it's when your hair gets tangled together.
Sephiroth: tangled?
Tifa: some hair gets stuck together and forms a ball. Kinda like this /holds up a fist/
Sephiroth//gets into a defensive position/ don't hit me /rubs face/ your hits hurt.
Tifa: I'm not gonna hit you. Let me help you with that. /takes out hairbrush/
Sephiroth//takes out masamune and takes huge leap backward/ BARBARIAN!
Tifa: it's just a hairbrush
Sephiroth: your not putting that thing in my beautiful hair /runs fingers through hair and gets stuck...yet again/
Tifa: it's not gonna hurt...much
Sephiroth: NO...GET AWAY
Tifa: GET BACK HERE
After awhile Tifa finally wrestles Sephiroth to the ground. He's kicking and screaming like a 2-year-old.
Sephiroth: NO..LEAVE ME ALONE DON'T DO IT. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Meanwhile...Outside
The townspeople are running and screaming in fear of whatever deranged monster is in the inn. AKA Cloud
Random Townsperson #1: RUN CLOUDS BACK
Random Townsperson #2: That didn't sound like him.
RT#1: STILL WE SOULD RUN LIKE IT IS CLOUD
RT#2: though it is not
RT#1&2: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Back in the inn Tifa has finished brushing Sephiroth's hair and got up off the floor
Tifa: there all done
Sephiroth: huh?
Tifa: that wasn't too bad was it...and your knot is gone
Sephiroth//runs fingers all the way through his hair...finally/ it's gone...IT'S REALLY GONE!
Tifa: ...okay, I'm just gonna leave now... /starts walking to front door/
Sephiroth: WAIT!
Tifa//stops/ what?
Sephiroth: gimmie that
Tifa: what?
Sephiroth: that /points at brush in her hand/
Tifa: but this is my brush. Get your own
Sephiroth: but I want that one
Tifa: too bad, it's mine. I spent a whole 10 gil on this.
Sephiroth: GIMMIE//tackles her/
Tifa: get off me!
Sephiroth: not until you give it to me!
Innkeeper: HEY! If your gonna do that at least rent a room...only 200 gil (an-sorry if this isn't the right price we are on the third disk and all the guy wants to do is sleep)
/choice box pops up/
1. rent a room 2. keep fighting 3. kill the innkeeper for thinking that way
Tifa: ummm... what should we do?
Sephiroth: I'm liking that third choice
Tifa: but...that's just mean
Sephiroth: how bout we do 3 first, then 1, then 2
Tifa: ...okay
And so they did the choice box in that order.
THE END
DD: ok everybody you know what happens now
BL: sneak peek, sneak peek!
DD: WRONG
BL: oh the other thing...wait...what's that again?
DD//falls down anime style/ click on that little purple box on the bottom left hand corner of your screen. You know...the one that says submit review. AND REVIEW DAMNIT
BL: that wasn't very nice now thanks to you they're not gonna review.
DD: sorry...lost the cool but the cool is back
BL: so please review. Next up Cloud and the Rubber Band. Sneak peek!
/insert picture of rubber band here/
DD: ok...c ya
BL: bye bye for now!
