DD: sorry it took us so long to update.
BL: yea, cuz YOU didn't want to write, CUZ YOU'RE A BUM//fumes with anger/
DD: when was there ever a time when we could actually write a chapter? We barely had five minutes each day//anime angry temple thingy/
BL: that's not true! We had more time! You just didn't want to write, cuz you were playing ps2!
DD: you never even asked! I'm not a mind reader you know.
BL: I DID SO ASK YOU!
DD: AND EVEN IF I SAID NO, YOU SHOULD HAVE REMINDED ME OF OUR MANY READERS! THEN I WOULD HAVE BEEN ON THE COMPUTER FASTER THAN YOU COULD SAY...SOMETHING!
BL: WHAT! WHY YOU LITTLE...!
/dust cloud appears/
Vincent//walks in/ there they go again. /anime sigh/ what ARE we going to do with you two...?
Cloud//skips in//singing/ I love you fluffy! You're my bestest friend in the entire universe!
Vincent: Hey Cloud, since those two are busy, why don't you do the disclaimer?
Cloud//whiny/ but me and fluffy were just about to get some ice crea-
Vincent: JUST DO IT! OTHERWISE.../evilly/ snap! Bye bye fluffy!
Cloud: NOOOOOOOO//clutches "fluffy"/ okay, I'll do it. /sniff/ deamondragon and /sniff/ thegreatblsama do not /sniff/ own /sniff/ Final Fantasy VII /sniff/
Vincent: good boy.
Cloud//runs away with tears in his eyes/ on with the /sniff/ fic /cries very very loudly/ Fluffy, I will never let you die at the hands of that SPOONY VAMPIRE!
Vincent: WHO ARE YOU CALLING A SPOONY VAMPIRE//chases him/
The Misadventures of the FFVII Crew: Chapter 3
Mr. Computer, Meet Mr. Death Penalty
Vincent was taking a very long walk down a Nibelheim road, VERY pissed off.
Vincent//mumbling/ I am not a spoony vampire. DO VAMPIRES EVEN EXIST?
Random Person: SHUT THE HELL UP YOU SPOONY VAMPIRE!
Vincent: YOU//shoots him/
Random Person//dead/
Vincent: I am NOT a spoony vampire...
Vincent walks into Nibelheim mansion to be greeted by...
...Cloud.
Cloud: HI VINNY!
Vincent: do NOT call me that, and what the hell are you doing here!
Cloud: someone is very cranky today.
Vincent: CRANKY? I'LL SHOW YOU CRANKY//goes to strangle Cloud/
Cloud: did ya get my E-mail?
Vincent: E-what?
Cloud: E-mail silly. I made your own screen name and /gasp/ oh my goodness! I forgot to tell you about it! Silly me!
Vincent: you made me a what?
Cloud: come here//grabs Vincent's arm and drags him into the other room, where the computer is already on/
Vincent//looks at it disgusted/ what is THAT THING doing in MY house?
Cloud: YOUR house//happily/ this is OUR HOUSE!
Vincent: no, you just wish-
Cloud: ANYWAY! This here, is a computer!
Vincent: okay
Cloud: now, let me just log onto the internet and.../computer makes the dial up noises going on the internet/
Vincent//jumps back/ WHAT WAS THAT SOUND?
Cloud: that was just the computer you silly. Your such a silly Vinny.
Vincent: I thought I told you NOT to call me that!
Cloud: this is your screen name.
Vincent: "SpoonyVampire323 at yahoo dot com?" /fumes with anger/ I AM NOT A SPOONY VAMPIRE, NOR AM I A YAHOO!
Cloud: no, that's just where you're screen name is located.
Vincent//getting angrier/ SO, YOU THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY THAT A "SPOONY VAMPIRE" SHOULD BE LOCATED AT A YAHOO!
Cloud: no, that's just where your homepage is.
Vincent: I AM NOT A SPOONY VAMPIRE!
Cloud: I am just gonna leave you guys here to get more aquatinted.
Vincent: YOU ACT LIKE IT'S ALIVE!
/Cloud leaves/
Vincent//stares at computer/ are you mocking me?
Computer//stares back/
Vincent: STOP MOCKING ME!
/aim message pops up with user named "Hooters456"/
Hooters456: hey vincent!
Vincent//falls backwards over chair/ AHHHH! WHAT IS THIS THING?
Hooters456: its tifa
Vincent: this "thing" is called a tifa?
Hooters456: hello? R u there?
Vincent: hmmmm../looks at keyboard/ perhaps I'm supposed to push these little buttons to answer back.
SpoonyVampire323: gsukwfheiagdsuhgsdhehirhi
Hooters456: r u on drugs?
Vincent: how dare this "tifa" insult me//hits caps lock/
SpoonyVampire323: HADVUHHGIOGBGFWEGY'GIHINEWHGY!
Hooters456: r u trying 2 curse me out? cid does it differently.
Vincent: WHO IS THIS CID//shakes screen/ I DEMAND TO KNOW WHO HE IS!
Hooters456: he does it more like this:
Hooters456: #$$# &&$#
Vincent: WHAT ARE THESE SYMBOLS//gasp/ THIS "TIFA" IS TRYING TO CURSE ME! WELL, I WONT LET YOU!
Hooters456: well, you r boring me
Vincent: I AM NOT BORING!
Hooters456: I'll c ya around
/Hooters456 logs off/
Vincent: "logs off"? what is this "logs off"? I DEMAND TO KNOW! TELL ME!
/another AIM message pops up/
Vincent//falls backwards over chair...again/ WHAT?...ANOTHER "TIFA"?
IMEVIL666: guess who
Vincent: its "tifa" I KNOW! YOU'RE A TIFA!
IMEVIL666: u there, or r u 2 stupid 2 kno how 2 use a computer?
Vincent: YOU ARE STILL MOCKING ME//anger rising/
IMEVIL666: MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Vincent: THAT'S IT//takes out Death Penalty and shoots the computer screen multiple times/ DIE "TIFA"!
/Computer speakers make AIM 'bling' sound/
Vincent: I CANNOT SEE YOU AND YET YOU STILL MOCK ME//shoots speakers and hell...and the rest of the computer/
Computer//dead/
Vincent//panting/ THAT WILL TEACH YOU TO MOCK ME!
/Cloud walks in/
Cloud: WHAT DID YOU DO?
Vincent: IT WAS MOCKING ME! THAT THING CALLED "TIFA" WAS MOCKING ME!
Cloud: you were talking to Tifa!
Vincent: YES IT CALLED ITSELF TIFA! IT FIRST APPEARED AS "HOOTERS456", THEN IT CAME BACK AS "IMEVIL666"! BUT I SHOWED IT!
Cloud//sarcastically/ yep, you showed it.
Meanwhile...
Sephiroth: THAT BASTARD, HE DIDN'T EVEN TALK BACK BEFORE HE LOGGED OFF!
/is talking to Hooters456/
IMEVIL666: he didn't say goodbye. Idiot, he probably doesn't even kno how 2 use a computer.
Hooters456: I have to agree wit u there sephy.
IMEVIL666: DO NOT CALL ME THAT! Wait, y r u agreeing wit me n e way?
Hooters456: well, because when I was talkin to him, all he wrote was random letters
IMEVIL666: oh...what an idiot.
End Chapter
DD: just to let you all know, we don't own yahoo or AIM.
BL: and the spelling is supposed to be that way, cuz its how most peeps talk to each other on AIM.
DD: oh, and don't forget to review.
BL: next chapter is...
Both: Why is Meteor Pink?
BL: c ya soon!
Vincent: I SHOWED THEM ALL! ALL TIFAS WILL BOW TO ME!
