Dedicated to those who read Lonely and Thank you, Yoh. I really love you
guys for reviewing it! You know who you guys are and this one all goes for
you!
It feels so nice to know many people liked it, and I wish it were the same with this. This is not one of those typical YohAnna fanfic but a super- duper OOC-ish monologue. Please read this and then you'll know who's! (Gomen for the OOC factor! I never know whether ANNA is in character or what. ().
Disclaimer: I don't own Shaman King, and related trademarks.
~*~*~*~
Strength
By: Dark Hooded Eriol the Magician
It has been three days.
All I could see is darkness.
I could hear silence.
All I could feel is loneliness.
But I will not give up. I will continue to live.
For me and for Yoh.
I sense his presence when I pretend to be asleep. I could feel his touch and hear his voice as he stayed with me. I can feel the same, sad and worried Asakura Yoh at my bedside. I have never posed such vulnerability but under the circumstances, I had to compromise. I have never imagined that this would even happen to Kyouyama Anna.
It has been three days since the acid spilled to my eyes. It robbed me of my sight for some time but I don't know how long it will last. A month? A year? Even I do not know.
Three days from my life since I have last laid eyes on him. I fear it may be the last time I had seen him. The last time I saw my Yoh.
That very truth clung to my heavy heart and fastened its hold deeper and squeezed it painfully. I didn't want it to be the last time. I want to see the sweetly naïve and passive smile on his face. I wanted to see the deep, dark eyes that contrasted to his personality. I want to see Yoh accomplish his dream.
Away went my dream to be the wife of the Shaman King.
If the acid in my eyes hurt, this hurt more.
In this darkness, the possibility slowly grew bleaker.
It kept coming to me that I would not see him anymore and then I wanted to break into tears in the long hours of the night. but then I remembered I had no tears left. I wanted him to wrap his arms around me and assure me. I wanted him to hold me closer to his heart.
The hours I have spent alone had given me time to think, to meditate. My thoughts and reasons are still intact and my senses are sharpened to compensate for the temporary loss of sight. I have been trained to be stronger than any other, to be able to bear what trial is faced upon me; perhaps that is why I have never lost my sanity in this ordeal.
Thankfully, no Shaman Fight has occurred and I am left with the belief that my weird but precious fiancée is still alive. My Itako powers are still intact and I still feel the passing of the spirits, most of them had died in this hospital or just lost and wandering. I could almost hear their cries of pain and suffering. Almost reflecting my pain. Almost.
Yet amidst that, the events flash back to me, clear as photographs.
I was in the kitchen and was looking for the packet of my favorite tea. I didn't seem to want to disturb Yoh who was playing a Chinese checkers game with Ren Tao and was evidently losing. I heard some noises and accidentally turned over the bottle of open acid and it spilled mercilessly to my eyes.
Of course, I was caught off-guard. I didn't move quick enough and then, the burning pain started and I cannot open my eyes because it all hurt. I wanted to yell but no voice came out but only a shriek.
Yoh was the first one to hear my shriek of pain, and first to be at my side. He had ordered Horohoro to call the hospital while assuring me everything was all right. My eyes burned with agony and in that moment of weakness, I clung to him. Everything got blurry after that but I remember well that it was he was the one beside me when I woke up. I knew because it was his hand holding mine.
"Anna," he had said. "Its okay, I'm here."
He never left my side for the rest of the day, vigilantly watching me as I sleep. He was the one who had fed me since my hands were unstable. It also dawned upon me that a bandage was wound around my eyes, and for the first time in my life, I felt weak and dependent.
"Stay strong Anna, everything will be alright," Yoh whispered as he went away and left Tamao to care for me. I wanted him to stay but I don't think it will be best at this point; he still needs me to push through with his training.
I clung to my only source of strength.
Yoh.
But I would never tell him that. He must see me as his strength and ironically he's mine.
His friends visited me; Horohoro bearing noisy trumpets, Pirika with the her cheerful singing, Ren Tao yelling at them, Chocolove making jokes with no one listening, Lady Jeanne blessing me every now and again, Lyserg Diethyl offering me sweets and Tamao I could hear arguing with Horohoro and of course Manta was there and he was extremely nice by giving me a box of chocolates.
Yoh gave me a bouquet of roses; I could smell their fragrance even from afar. The roses stand beside my bedside table in a vase as Tamao had said. I wished I could see them, their sun-kissed petals blooming ever so beautifully. I could smell the fragrant aroma as a gentle wind passes through the open window. My heart ached.
This is all that had happened, and I am here in my bed, blind and immobile. I am alone; I do not sense Tamao anywhere. I cannot imagine my whole life like this. I need my sight and Yoh.
Undeniable is the fact that at the span of the three years of knowing him, I had come to the point of accepting and loving him. I have fallen in love with the Asakura Yoh whom I had been training and slapping and pushing towards the title of the Shaman King. Its not that I enjoy to inflict so much punishment. but he needs to learn.
And experience is the best teacher. I cannot help but worry sometimes although I never showed it to him. There's always the possibility he will lose his battle. and his life. Yet. I believe in Asakura Yoh. His powers and capabilities as a shaman, and his loving heart are more than worthy for the rightful title to be bestowed upon him.
More than once I felt that I was the student and he was my teacher. It felt silly and absurd to be able to be taught the workings of love by the least person you can expect it from. His gentleness, kindness, and obedience. even those little nothings he undoubtedly gave me showed me he cared for me. It was enough for me to love him.
The door opened and my head swiveled to the source of the sound. I heard footsteps and hushed voices. And then I felt Yoh's presence standing beside me.
"Anna?" Yoh asked softly. He offered a hand and helped me sit up.
"Yoh," I answer. I turned my head toward him, trying to find his voice again. It struck me how vulnerable and how useless I was. It was humiliating because Kyouyama Anna is never helpless.
"I have a surprise for you." Yoh said and I could almost surmise a chuckle escaping his lips.
And before I could retort, I felt the firm hand of the doctor, slowly unwinding the bandage for what seemed like forever. At last it fell free and my closed eyes blinked slowly in the blinding light that was pouring in from the window. I turn my head and saw the slightly blurred images of Yoh and the doctor.
Little seconds more and the images cleared and I can see him again; I felt that Kami-sama has granted me another life. I was glad and happy to see him, though I know it wont show in my face, his face, his eyes, his lips and his smile. every feature of him I took in and carved in my heart. He moved swiftly and placed another huge bouquet of roses into my arms. I bowed my head and smelled their fragrant petals and rubbed my cheeks against its softness. Beautiful red roses from Yoh.
I didn't notice that the doctor was gone and we were alone.
Yoh sat at the side of my bed and watched me with his sincerest smile. The sparkles in his eyes told me he was enjoying my show of happiness. He moved closer to me and suddenly grabbed me and pressed me into his warm embrace.
"Y-Yoh." I whispered as tears formed a misty film over my eyes.
Yoh nuzzled into my neck and stroked my short blonde hair. He pressed me closer and it seemed there was hesitance. Of course, there would be since in normal circumstances, I would slap him down until he begged for my mercy.
"You're so small. I'm afraid that your bones will break if I hold you too tight."Yoh said softly as he loosened his embrace and looked down to me. A tear slid down his cheek and fell to a rose, halting like a dewdrop.
My lower lip trembled and I rested my head upon his chest to hide the falling tears. His arms found their way around me again, and his chin rested on my forehead. He was still boyishly slender, lacked the fullness and power of a man but he was already maturing into a young man.
"Y-Yoh," I said softly, almost inaudibly. "A-Are you crying?"
He looked at me again and smiled as he wiped away the thin trail of tears. "F-Funny I should cry. I-I shouldn't cry."
"I-Its okay. Yoh?"
"Yes Anna?" he said meekly.
"I'm happy to see you." I say and then I laid my head against him again, his warmth surrounding me.
I thanked Kami-sama that day, for giving me a reason and the strength to live.
~*~*~*~*~
[080203,9:03 pm]
Hello, welcome back. I hope you liked this one as much as I liked writing it. Please comment/review/ask/anything to me, please? I had the idea when I heard the song yesterday from Myx (a local MTV sort of show) and the MTV was kawaii and then it hit me. Again.
I'm sorry if it took me so long to put this up! I was writing for a Gundam Wing fanfic (I Never Stopped. if you'd like to check out!) and then I finished it and wrote this. I'm so sorry for the OOC. I promise I'll try harder, (its also my fault I cant write in the first person point of view) next time. Thanks again for dropping by and reading this.
I'm sorry this is late, too.
It feels so nice to know many people liked it, and I wish it were the same with this. This is not one of those typical YohAnna fanfic but a super- duper OOC-ish monologue. Please read this and then you'll know who's! (Gomen for the OOC factor! I never know whether ANNA is in character or what. ().
Disclaimer: I don't own Shaman King, and related trademarks.
~*~*~*~
Strength
By: Dark Hooded Eriol the Magician
It has been three days.
All I could see is darkness.
I could hear silence.
All I could feel is loneliness.
But I will not give up. I will continue to live.
For me and for Yoh.
I sense his presence when I pretend to be asleep. I could feel his touch and hear his voice as he stayed with me. I can feel the same, sad and worried Asakura Yoh at my bedside. I have never posed such vulnerability but under the circumstances, I had to compromise. I have never imagined that this would even happen to Kyouyama Anna.
It has been three days since the acid spilled to my eyes. It robbed me of my sight for some time but I don't know how long it will last. A month? A year? Even I do not know.
Three days from my life since I have last laid eyes on him. I fear it may be the last time I had seen him. The last time I saw my Yoh.
That very truth clung to my heavy heart and fastened its hold deeper and squeezed it painfully. I didn't want it to be the last time. I want to see the sweetly naïve and passive smile on his face. I wanted to see the deep, dark eyes that contrasted to his personality. I want to see Yoh accomplish his dream.
Away went my dream to be the wife of the Shaman King.
If the acid in my eyes hurt, this hurt more.
In this darkness, the possibility slowly grew bleaker.
It kept coming to me that I would not see him anymore and then I wanted to break into tears in the long hours of the night. but then I remembered I had no tears left. I wanted him to wrap his arms around me and assure me. I wanted him to hold me closer to his heart.
The hours I have spent alone had given me time to think, to meditate. My thoughts and reasons are still intact and my senses are sharpened to compensate for the temporary loss of sight. I have been trained to be stronger than any other, to be able to bear what trial is faced upon me; perhaps that is why I have never lost my sanity in this ordeal.
Thankfully, no Shaman Fight has occurred and I am left with the belief that my weird but precious fiancée is still alive. My Itako powers are still intact and I still feel the passing of the spirits, most of them had died in this hospital or just lost and wandering. I could almost hear their cries of pain and suffering. Almost reflecting my pain. Almost.
Yet amidst that, the events flash back to me, clear as photographs.
I was in the kitchen and was looking for the packet of my favorite tea. I didn't seem to want to disturb Yoh who was playing a Chinese checkers game with Ren Tao and was evidently losing. I heard some noises and accidentally turned over the bottle of open acid and it spilled mercilessly to my eyes.
Of course, I was caught off-guard. I didn't move quick enough and then, the burning pain started and I cannot open my eyes because it all hurt. I wanted to yell but no voice came out but only a shriek.
Yoh was the first one to hear my shriek of pain, and first to be at my side. He had ordered Horohoro to call the hospital while assuring me everything was all right. My eyes burned with agony and in that moment of weakness, I clung to him. Everything got blurry after that but I remember well that it was he was the one beside me when I woke up. I knew because it was his hand holding mine.
"Anna," he had said. "Its okay, I'm here."
He never left my side for the rest of the day, vigilantly watching me as I sleep. He was the one who had fed me since my hands were unstable. It also dawned upon me that a bandage was wound around my eyes, and for the first time in my life, I felt weak and dependent.
"Stay strong Anna, everything will be alright," Yoh whispered as he went away and left Tamao to care for me. I wanted him to stay but I don't think it will be best at this point; he still needs me to push through with his training.
I clung to my only source of strength.
Yoh.
But I would never tell him that. He must see me as his strength and ironically he's mine.
His friends visited me; Horohoro bearing noisy trumpets, Pirika with the her cheerful singing, Ren Tao yelling at them, Chocolove making jokes with no one listening, Lady Jeanne blessing me every now and again, Lyserg Diethyl offering me sweets and Tamao I could hear arguing with Horohoro and of course Manta was there and he was extremely nice by giving me a box of chocolates.
Yoh gave me a bouquet of roses; I could smell their fragrance even from afar. The roses stand beside my bedside table in a vase as Tamao had said. I wished I could see them, their sun-kissed petals blooming ever so beautifully. I could smell the fragrant aroma as a gentle wind passes through the open window. My heart ached.
This is all that had happened, and I am here in my bed, blind and immobile. I am alone; I do not sense Tamao anywhere. I cannot imagine my whole life like this. I need my sight and Yoh.
Undeniable is the fact that at the span of the three years of knowing him, I had come to the point of accepting and loving him. I have fallen in love with the Asakura Yoh whom I had been training and slapping and pushing towards the title of the Shaman King. Its not that I enjoy to inflict so much punishment. but he needs to learn.
And experience is the best teacher. I cannot help but worry sometimes although I never showed it to him. There's always the possibility he will lose his battle. and his life. Yet. I believe in Asakura Yoh. His powers and capabilities as a shaman, and his loving heart are more than worthy for the rightful title to be bestowed upon him.
More than once I felt that I was the student and he was my teacher. It felt silly and absurd to be able to be taught the workings of love by the least person you can expect it from. His gentleness, kindness, and obedience. even those little nothings he undoubtedly gave me showed me he cared for me. It was enough for me to love him.
The door opened and my head swiveled to the source of the sound. I heard footsteps and hushed voices. And then I felt Yoh's presence standing beside me.
"Anna?" Yoh asked softly. He offered a hand and helped me sit up.
"Yoh," I answer. I turned my head toward him, trying to find his voice again. It struck me how vulnerable and how useless I was. It was humiliating because Kyouyama Anna is never helpless.
"I have a surprise for you." Yoh said and I could almost surmise a chuckle escaping his lips.
And before I could retort, I felt the firm hand of the doctor, slowly unwinding the bandage for what seemed like forever. At last it fell free and my closed eyes blinked slowly in the blinding light that was pouring in from the window. I turn my head and saw the slightly blurred images of Yoh and the doctor.
Little seconds more and the images cleared and I can see him again; I felt that Kami-sama has granted me another life. I was glad and happy to see him, though I know it wont show in my face, his face, his eyes, his lips and his smile. every feature of him I took in and carved in my heart. He moved swiftly and placed another huge bouquet of roses into my arms. I bowed my head and smelled their fragrant petals and rubbed my cheeks against its softness. Beautiful red roses from Yoh.
I didn't notice that the doctor was gone and we were alone.
Yoh sat at the side of my bed and watched me with his sincerest smile. The sparkles in his eyes told me he was enjoying my show of happiness. He moved closer to me and suddenly grabbed me and pressed me into his warm embrace.
"Y-Yoh." I whispered as tears formed a misty film over my eyes.
Yoh nuzzled into my neck and stroked my short blonde hair. He pressed me closer and it seemed there was hesitance. Of course, there would be since in normal circumstances, I would slap him down until he begged for my mercy.
"You're so small. I'm afraid that your bones will break if I hold you too tight."Yoh said softly as he loosened his embrace and looked down to me. A tear slid down his cheek and fell to a rose, halting like a dewdrop.
My lower lip trembled and I rested my head upon his chest to hide the falling tears. His arms found their way around me again, and his chin rested on my forehead. He was still boyishly slender, lacked the fullness and power of a man but he was already maturing into a young man.
"Y-Yoh," I said softly, almost inaudibly. "A-Are you crying?"
He looked at me again and smiled as he wiped away the thin trail of tears. "F-Funny I should cry. I-I shouldn't cry."
"I-Its okay. Yoh?"
"Yes Anna?" he said meekly.
"I'm happy to see you." I say and then I laid my head against him again, his warmth surrounding me.
I thanked Kami-sama that day, for giving me a reason and the strength to live.
~*~*~*~*~
[080203,9:03 pm]
Hello, welcome back. I hope you liked this one as much as I liked writing it. Please comment/review/ask/anything to me, please? I had the idea when I heard the song yesterday from Myx (a local MTV sort of show) and the MTV was kawaii and then it hit me. Again.
I'm sorry if it took me so long to put this up! I was writing for a Gundam Wing fanfic (I Never Stopped. if you'd like to check out!) and then I finished it and wrote this. I'm so sorry for the OOC. I promise I'll try harder, (its also my fault I cant write in the first person point of view) next time. Thanks again for dropping by and reading this.
I'm sorry this is late, too.
