A/N: Thank you to everyone that has waited patiently. I do apologize for making you wait for so long. Well, the writer's block is now gone and I'm currently working on chapter four! Yay for me! After the chapter, there will be more author's notes – don't forget to read them!

As a second note, I've learned that people are reading this story without reading Free Falling or Even Angels Fall and are getting extremely confused. It's a trilogy, people! You Must Read the First Two (or at the very least the second part) Stories in the Trilogy To Understand This One. Now I know that sounds like a lot of work, but, please, spare me the "I don't get it"s. It's the very least you could do for me. *smiles*

Also, I've run out of chapter title ideas. After FF and EAF and now Illicit Love, I just can't do it anymore.

**This chapter is lovingly dedicated to my "other half" (as we're Two of a Kind), Nicole (aka Zetta). Thank you for everything you do for me, listening to my BS and complaints, and being my first reader. So much encouragement, so much stalking, so much talk, so little time. Glad that you're there for me, and I'll always be there for you!

Disclaimer: None of this is mine. Only the names/places you don't recognize, and stuff like that.

Falling into Grace

Chapter Three

"I've got the greatest idea," Sirius whispered one snowy November evening.

"What's that?" Remus asked tiredly. Since he had agreed to become Seeker on the Quidditch team, he hadn't slept very well. He didn't know why, but he could just feel a disturbance.

"Well, I've got two ideas. One is to charm the dungeons so the Slytherins can't get out."

"That's a great idea?" Remus asked, knitting his eyebrows.

"It is. Anyway, my second idea is to have a party –"

"We have parties all the time."

"Remus!" Sirius grunted in frustration. "Would you drop the sarcasm and listen to me? We should throw a special celebration on Christmas Eve for James and Lily's anniversary. I mean, two years is a long time for a teenage relationship."

"That's a great idea!" Remus exclaimed. "Now go bother someone else with your brilliant ideas. It's not like we all didn't know they'd make it this long."

"Ouch. Someone's rather cranky. What's wrong with you?"

Remus shook his head. "I'm just giving you shit. I'm sorry, I'm just tired."

"It's fine. You go get some sleep, I'm going to go bug Lily and James."

"Tell them goodnight for me, would you?"

Sirius nodded and patted Remus's shoulder before getting p and walking up the stairs tit he room James and Lily inhabited. He said the password and walked in, exclaiming, "Knock, knock."

Lily, who was brushing her teeth, poked her head out of the bathroom and waved wither her free hand.

"We're not home," James called from the bedroom.

"That's okay, I can try back later."

Lily came out of the bathroom wearing a black silk nightgown. Sirius felt his heart rate increase. She looked into his eyes for a few seconds, as if she were reading his mind (which was unusually full of dirty thoughts), then smiled. She took a step forward, then as if confused, took two steps back.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, not exactly unfriendly.

"I just wanted to come here to hack you both off."

"That's lovely. The last thing I want to do before I go to bed is see you."

"That was harsh," he replied.

"I'm kidding." She stepped forward again and hugged him. "Good night."

"Good night."

James came out of the bedroom and Lily said she'd wait up for him.

"Hey Sirius, what's up?"

"Not much. I just wanted to say good night."

"Remus was tired of putting up with you, eh?" Sirius grinned. "You've been at it all day. Did you take a hyper potion or something?"

"It must be the moon tide or something because I've been out of it."

"I know, we all have – it's not just you. You've been a goofball, Remus has been irritable, Lily has had conflicting emotions, and I've been working overtime with Quidditch and Head Boy-ism and trying to keep the three of you from arguing all the time."

"We're very thankful," Sirius said, his hand over his heart. "The things James Potter does to save our lives. My hero." James rolled his eyes. "Do you want to have guys' night? There's an empty bed in the dorm..."

"You really want me to spend the night?"

"You're are bestest friend, how could we not?"

"All right. Let me go tell Lily."

James went to hug and kiss Lily goodnight. Then he went to the seventh year boys' dorm. The four young men laughed and joked and talked all night. They talked about love interests and girls and classes. They made plans for the next full moon. They talked about plans for Christmas and plans for after graduation. They were up extremely late until the early hours of the morning, just nearly before sunrise.

At nine-thirty, Lily came into the room and opened all the drapes, letting in the late morning sunlight. The four cringed, groaned, and pulled the covers over their heads.

"Have you guys been drinking?" she asked, placing her hands on her hips. "If you have, I'm getting your arses up and we're going for a walk."

"Lils, we haven't been drinking. We were up until the crack of dawn. Leave us alone," Sirius said.

"It's your own damn fault! I'll go by myself then, thank you."

"You're welcome."

"Have fun," Peter said. Lily walked out of the dorm, growling, "Arseholes," then slamming the door.

"What are we arseholes?" Remus asked.

"I don't know, nor do I care," Sirius said. "I'm going back to sleep."

* * *

Lily walked around the lake, throwing bits of bread into the water for the giant squid. She had met up with Icilyn Garicky, who was in town for the week.

"So how's school?" Lily asked.

"Really well," the older woman replied, brushing her long black hair from her face. "How's Sirius?"

Lily thought for a moment. "Same old Sirius. He missed you a lot, though. He'll be so happy that you're here. He didn't want to get his ass out of bed this morning though."

"That's okay, I'll surprise him sometime later."

"He'll love it. James never does anything very romantic for me anymore. Here you've got Sirius writing poetry for you and I've got the Quidditch Fool. His idea of romance is pizza, butterbeer, and listening the Quidditch game on the wireless." Icilyn giggled. "I've got the wrong man! I'll give you James plus fifty galleons for Sirius."

Icilyn's smile was wide and her eyes were dancing. "He is great, isn't he?"

The finished their loop around the lake, listening to their feet crunch in the path of snow.

"How about we go up to Gryffindor Tower and sit by the fire? Then I'll get Sirius and you can surprise him."

"Sounds good to me."

The two women walked through the castle hall and up to Gryffindor tower. Upon entering, Icilyn looked around.

"Lordy, look at this. I've never been in here – it's so glamorous."

"Is it? It makes me wonder what Slytherin looks like."

"Huge, I'll bet – you know how they are."

"I have the passwords to everything, I think I'd like to check it out sometime."

"Urgh! I wan never tempted!" Icy shuddered. "Who knows what they would do if they caught you in there."

They started up the stairs.

"Icilyn!" A voice called. Slowly she turned. "ICY!"

Sirius raced up the stairs and tackled the black-haired girl until she was lying on the stairs and he was on top of her, kidding every inch of her face. She giggled and squealed, then started smacking him to get him off her.

"Sirius!" she cried.

"Icy, I missed you!!!" Sirius cried. "Why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

"Surprise!"

Sirius helped Icilyn up then wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her properly.

"Uh, guys, it's all great for you to be occupied because you're excited to see one another, but I'm not enjoying myself," Lily said.

"What? Feeling left out?" Sirius asked. "Let's go find James."

"He's in the library," Lily stated. "Icy and I were just going to drink hot chocolate and chat."

"How'd you know where James was? He just disappeared on us."

"Yeah, he's in the library looking for books on –" Lily stopped. How did she know where James was, and why was he looking for books on –

"Can I join your girly chat?" Sirius asked, interrupting Lily's thoughts.

"You're a sexy guy, Siri, but I don't think you'd make such a good girl," Icilyn teased.

"I'm glad I'm a guy, that's all I can say!" The three started ascending the staircase again. "I mean, I don't understand how anyone can bleed for five days and not die."

"We're not going over this again, Sirius," Lily said. "Don't bring up subjects that you refuse to listen to and learn about."

Sirius went on, trying to push the two women's buttons. "I mean, I don't know how I can trust someone who can bleed that long without dying."

"Asshole!" Icilyn said.

"You better watch yourself, Sirius," Lily said. "We outnumber you now." Lily said the password and they were inside the Head Room,

The three laughed and talked, sipping hot chocolate until lunchtime, when Icilyn informed the other two that she had a meeting with Dumbledore to attend to.

"Dumbledore?" Sirius asked. "So you were only here to for him and not for me?" He pouted, pushing out his full lower lip.

"Oh stop! I came here to see everyone."

"What did he want to you about?"

"No idea, something good I hope."

Icilyn kissed Sirius goodbye, then hugged Lily and exited the room.

"Well, I suppose we should meet James and Peter and Remus down at lunch. Then we can meet Icy again."

"Those three are already at lunch?"

"Yeah," Lily replied.

"Well, let's get down there before they eat all the turkey sandwiches!"

They walked down to the Great Hall and sat at the Gryffindor table with their friends. Lily told them about Icilyn's arrival, then talked about how excited she was for Halloween to come. Peter took over the conversation by explaining his fear of ghosts. Nearly Headless Nick, the resident Gryffindor ghost, was offended at this point and left the table. Lily leaned her head on James's shoulder and drifted away in thoughts.

She remembered the Halloween ball her primary school had for the fourth years and up. It was more of a parent-professor-student social affair, but they all got to dress up. Every year Lily went as a witch – a green-skinned, wart-on-her-nose kind of witch. She smiled, thinking about how she was now a witch (she had always been a witch, though, she reminded herself, but never knew it), and here at a wonderful school with wonderful friends, and everything seemed perfect.

Of course, she knew that this world wasn't perfect. In fact, she suspected that a lot of wizards and witches would rather be a Muggle, blinded by their own sense of security.

"What are you thinking about?" James whispered, kissing the top of her head.

"Not much. Are you still hungry? Eat the rest of my sandwich – it's chicken and ham, your favorite."

"Not hungry?" James asked, taking the sandwich off her plate and biting into it.

"I had hot chocolate and donuts with Sirius and Icilyn."

"Speaking of Icy, here she comes. She looks happy."

"Hey guys!" the black-haired girl exclaimed.

"What's up?" Peter asked.

"What did Professor Dumbledore want?" Lily asked. Icilyn smiled widely, her white teeth flashing against her creamy skin.

"He said that next year, Professor Altama has decided to retire. Professor Dumbledore needs a replacement – "

"So he asked you?" Sirius said, excitement already in his voice.

"Yep! I'm apprenticing this year as much as I can with balancing my classes at the university. By next year, I'll be known as the new professor of Astronomy."

"That's wonderful!" James said.

"Professor Garicky, sounds nice," Remus said. "Congratulations."

"Thanks. I think I'm going to follow my family tradition and take my mother's maiden name, though. My family is one of those matriarchal types and it's respectful to take your mother's last name because she is the one who raised you and made you what you are."

"Makes sense," Lily said, nodding.

"So, next year, I'll be known as Professor Sinistra."

"Sinistra? That doesn't suit you? Why not Professor Black?"

"Now Sirius –"

"If you go by Black everyone will know that you're taken," Sirius reasoned.

"Everyone already knows that I'm yours. I don't need your last name to prove it. Besides, you don't own me and that's all that the last name proves."

Lily looked at James. "She's got a good point, you know. When we get married, I'm keeping my last name." James scowled.

"If you don't want to marry me, that's fine. I've got a hundred girls waiting in line."

"Sure you do."

"I do."

"I've got several people in line for me too," Lily replied. "So that's just fine. I've got my choice between Howard Sedan, John Farren, and" – she suppressed a shudder – "Severus Snape to name a few."

Sirius pretended to gag, Remus and Peter looked horrified, and James and Icilyn's jaws dropped.

"Nice effect," Lily said.

"Please, please, please tell me you said that for the shock value," Sirius pleaded.

"That's gross!" Lily said. "Very gross."

"I hardly think that Snape is a lovely candidate compared to myself, don't you agree," James asked. Lily kissed him lightly on the lips.

"I don't think that anyone's a better candidate than you." She kissed him again. "But I'm still young and still beautiful – you, on the other hand, are getting gray hair and wrinkles before my eyes!" James rolled his eyes. "You hold the weight of the world on your shoulders, James."

"And you, my love, are holding me."

* * *

Lily sat up in bed, her breathing ragged. She hadn't had a bad dream, but she felt there was some reason to fear something. No more premonitions, she thought. She looked at James, who was sleeping so hard he snored – not loudly, she thought, but still.

Her eyes wandered in the darkness, as did her mind.

She had been not right lately. It wasn't closed to that time of the month, so that wasn't the reason. Maybe she'd been having a surge of hormones. She had found herself thinking about sex a lot more that even James noticed the difference and he started calling her a sex kitten.

That was all fine and dandy for him, but was really bothersome to Lily. Not that she minded being referred to as a Sex Goddess and the like – secretly she had always wished that she could live up to titles like that even though they were a little wanton. But a lot of these thoughts were directed not at James, but at Sirius.

She thought of his hands touching her. His hands that were calloused from Quidditch. Hands that were strong. Hands that had fingers so long and eager...

Stop! she yelled at herself, pushing the comforter off a little ways because of the heat that had risen in her body.

The thing that bothered her even more was that Sirius felt the same way. She could feel it whenever she was near him. At those times, all logic disappeared and all she cared about was being closer to him. Maybe she was going through a stage of curiosity in her sex-life. Then it was completely normal to wonder what it was like to sleep with your boyfriend's best friend, right? It wasn't like anything would happen.

But it wasn't just the whole sex thing, she thought. She had been less irritable and more giving – she guessed would be the word for it, although she knew it didn't describe whatever it was.

If one of her friends wanted something, she could produce it. Answers to questions, a few extra galleons – all without the person even saying anything or her knowing where it item came from. The other day she wanted to have a cat to love on while James was off sneaking around, and what the hell do you know, a golden-colored cat crept into her room and started loving on her. Either this was some kind of psychic thing or she was losing her mind. Neither of the options sounded very appealing.

James stirred in his sleep then opened his eyes. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"Just thinking. Couldn't sleep really."

"Something you want to talk about?" James asked. Lily shook her head. He rubbed her shoulders, kneading at the knots with his fingers. "Not long into school and you're already tense."

"No, not really, probably just slept funny," she half-lied. She stretched then yawned. "Tell me a story, James. Maybe that will put me to sleep." They both grinned at the ludicrous idea, and she lied down into his arms as he began a story about a princess who was trapped in a tower. There was a prince that was supposed to rescue her, but he couldn't because he was in the middle of a Quidditch game. ("Typical," Lily said.) It turned out that the prince caught the Snitch, which was really the key to the tower and he and the princess lived happily ever after. Lily giggled at the story, then drifted off into a deep, peaceful sleep.

* * *

Lily was standing one the veranda of an eastern tower that was completely deserted. She wondered if anyone knew about it save for the staff and probably James and Sirius. She wondered for half a moment how she knew about it before she went back into her daze.

There was a biting breeze blowing, but she made no move to draw her dressing gown around her. She knew he would like her better this way – whoever "he" was.

"I was hoping," a voice whispered behind her, "that you'd meet me here sans clothing." He barely resisted the urge to kiss the back of her neck. She disgusted him, all the more to excite him. "Turn around for me." Lily obeyed without thought.

"Diaphanous enough, this is," he commented, pulling at the thin nightgown she was wearing. "Oh, I do hate this so too, you know. Smile for me." Lily smiled prettily, but it didn't reach her eyes. "Much better..."

He ran his hand over her breast, down the curves of her side and hip.

"So, anything new within our agreement?"

"No, sir." The reply was robotic.

"Mordred keeping you busy?" Lily nodded. He chuckled. "And how's Sirius holding up?"

"Holding up, my lord. Thoughts run amuck but his phallus stays down as far as I know."

"But in the meantime it's Mordred who's – er – benefiting from the frustration you've been feeling. Soon enough, my dear. You've been trying to make everyone else happy lately and you'll get your reward soon."

"But I don't want – "

"Sh, sh, sh. Yes, you do," he hissed softly. "It's all part of the plan. You'll get what you want and I'll get what I want. Isn't that the way everything should be? Everyone should be able to get what they want, right?" Lily nodded.

"Now, Mordred – does he suspect anything?"

"He realizes the difference, but has made no comment."

"Wonderful..." he said, brushing the auburn strands off of Lily's face. "If you ever get tired –"

"That won't be necessary," she answered quickly, as if coming out of her trance for a second.

"Of course it won't. You know, if your blood wasn't so common, I wouldn't mind you marrying my son. You're a brilliant little number and a beautiful thing, but it's Sirius you want most, now isn't it?" Lily opened her mouth to protest. "Shush darling. Don't I always know what's best for you?" The redhead nodded.

"Now, give me a kiss and go back to bed before Mordred's sleeping potion wears off."

Lily stepped forward and kissed his cheek in a daughter-like way and then walked from the veranda and back to her room, where she slept soundly with James. When she awoke the next morning, she had a hideous headache, but couldn't remember a single thing.

* * *

Sirius felt drained. That was the only word he could think of to describe himself. Well, maybe not the only word. Randy fit quite nicely if he thought about it. But he didn't want to think about it. No, that would be bad.

He just couldn't figure it out. He couldn't get his mind off of Lily. He tried to tell himself that his hormones had gone into overdrive just to hack him off since Icilyn wasn't there and his "feelings" were being directed at Lily because he spent most of his time with her.

He didn't know.

All he knew was that it was past midnight (he guessed, as he had refrained from looking at the clock) and he hadn't gotten any sleep. Every night for the past week he had been dreaming about Lily. And not so subtle dreams either. They drove him wild, which therefore drove him to guilt, which drove him to not sleep because of that guilt.

The strangest thing was, though, that Lily seemed to be reading his thoughts. He had learned now that anything was possible. Lily reading his mind was embarrassing, yes, but it really seemed to him that she didn't seem to mind.

Maybe it was his imagination. A week's worth of no sleep could do that to a man.

He shuddered and rolled over. He truly felt he was a horrible person. James was his best friend. Lily was James's girlfriend. It certainly wasn't right.

But he was a teenager after all. A surge of hormones was nothing to be guilty of, unless those desires were acted upon, of course.

He let himself drift into slumber. He had his dreams, but he slept better than anyone else in the dorm that night.

* * *

The owl post came in earlier than usual for a Saturday morning. It was now early December and steadily making it's way up to Christmas. That must have been the reason the post was early and James opened the letter he had received from his mum and dad before he could get food on his plate (a real shock to Lily, who dished up for him anyway).

"Well, that's interesting," he said. He scratched his head. "Mum and Dad want me to come home for Christmas holiday this year."

"How lovely," Lily said.

He looked at Lily. "Lovely?"

"What? I've spent time at your house before, James. I happen to like your parents."

"I always beg not to go home for the holidays. I'd rather be here than go through Christmas hell with my parents."

"Oh, it's not that bad, James," Sirius said. "I've been to your house for Christmas once. Your parents were very nice and giving."

"You forgot embarrassing," James muttered. "Every single year I'm embarrassed by them somehow."

"That's a parent's job," Peter said. "My parents embarrass me all the time."

"No, it's bad at the Potter house," Sirius said. He smirked. "Remember when they let you have the Christmas party when we were ten?"

"Please, don't remind me – that was the worst Christmas ever!"

"I want to hear about it," Remus said.

"No."

"Or what about the Christmas when we were five."

"Oh my god, that was even worse."

"What?" Lily whined. "I want to know."

"When we were five we had a Christmas Party and everyone we knew was invited. James had the biggest crush on Laura Gimli, and his mum let slip that he still wet the bed." James groaned.

"Until you were five?" Remus asked.

"Yes, if you must know," James snapped.

Lily giggled. "I'd like to be there for one of her embarrassing stories."

"Wish granted," James replied. "My mum invited all of you guys for Christmas this year. She says we spend too much time at this school and, as it is our last year, we should get away from all the stress. This will be just great."

"Hmm, I wonder what she'll do this year," Peter said. "Anything we should know about beforehand? Snogging the walls in your house or still wetting the bed?"

"I assure you that that problem has been solved," Lily said.

"Well, you want embarrassment, she'll give it to you."

"By embarrassing him," Sirius added. James didn't look too happy.

"Cheer up, how bad could it be?" Lily said.

"Bad."

"Well then, I'm looking forward to it," Remus said.

James made a face. This Christmas was supposed to be extra-super special. Being back home, though... He wondered if it would still work. It would be a festive and high-spirited time, for sure. His parents wouldn't be too much of a damper – Lily seemed to like them a lot. Maybe he could pull it off.

Besides, he really didn't think Lily would say no.

* * *

A/N: Thank you all SO much for all the encouragement that you've given me to continue. To those who have read Illicit Love and reviewed about FG, I really appreciate your support. This time around I was so excited to finally have the chapter finished and I lost the list of reviewers of chapter two, that I didn't make a list, but I promise to have a list for this chapter on chapter four. Yes, chapter four is on its way. I just started it. Yay!

Thank you, thank you, thank you! You have no idea what this all means to me.

Chapter four will be here soon (sooner than this one, I promise!).

Just don't forget about me.

And please hope that writer's block doesn't come back!

Happy Holidays!

Luvs from Lavender