Chapter 3

After school, I met my stepbrothers out in the school parking lot. My oldest stepbrother, Jake-who I call Sleepy-takes classes at the nearby community college, so when he didn't have a class he would pick me, Doc, and Brad-who I call Dopey-after school.

We all piled into the car, Dopey sitting up front by Sleepy, and Doc and I in the back. As we started to go out of the parking lot, Dopey turned around in his seat to look back at me. "I heard you're going out with Paul Slater tomorrow night," he said in an accusing tone, as if daring me to admit that a guy like Paul would date me.

I pretended to look out the window. "Yeah? Where'd you hear that?" I asked.

"Who's Paul Slater?" Sleepy wanted to know.

Dopey answered for me. "He's this new guy at school. During Chemistry, Paul was bragging to me that Suze asked him out this morning." I shot Dopey a dirty look but he ignored me. "She's got the hots for him."

Sleepy glanced at me in the rearview mirror. "Is that why you're dressed like that?"

Doc looked at me thoughtfully. "You know, Suze, when peacocks are looking for a mate, the males show off their tail feathers to attract the females. Sort of like what you were doing with Paul."

"I do not," I said, turning bright red, "have the hots for Paul Slater!" I looked down at my outfit. "And what, I'd like to know, is wrong with my outfit?" I glared at them, daring any of them to answer that question.

I swear, this is why, for the first sixteen years of my life, I was an only child. I mean, before my mom married Andy and moved us to sunny California, I never had to listen to so many stupid people at once. Well, okay, that wasn't technically true. Doc wasn't dumb. In fact, he was the person I went to for homework help, even though he was three years behind me. But then, back when I lived in New York, guys weren't all that interested in me.

Not that Paul was interested in me. No, he definitely wasn't. I mean, back when I'd been working at the place he and his family was staying at, I had thought he did. But guys don't normally go around planning to kill the girls they're interested in. At least, that's what I thought Paul was planning to do. I mean, what else could he mean but that? Obviously he didn't want to date me. Not that I wanted to date him either. Sorry, but murderers weren't exactly my type.

Well, okay, Paul wasn't a murderer. At least, I was pretty sure he wasn't. Yet, anyway.

It wasn't until dinner that I realized just how much trouble I was in. "So, Suze," my mom said, setting down a bowl of mash potatoes on the table. "David says that you've got a date tomorrow night," she said, sitting down at the table. "Is it with that nice boy who was here yesterday?"

I shot a look at Doc. He shrugged, grinning at me sheepishly. "Yeah," I mumbled. "But it's no big deal, really."

Andy, my stepdad, sat down next to my mom at the table. "Of course it is, Suze. It's always a big deal when someone in this family gets a date." He smiled at me.

I rolled my eyes.

Toward the end of dinner, we got a visitor. No, it wasn't Paul, or anyone like that. It was Jesse. He doesn't usually come around when my family's there, but this time, I guess, was different. And he looked pretty happy about something. Apparently, he hadn't been paying attention to what I'd been doing that day.

As luck would have it, my mom chose that moment to ask, "So, Suze, what's this boy's name?"

I glanced at Jesse frantically. "Umm, well."

"Paul Slater," Dopey said through his chewing. "He's in my Chem class."

I watched as Jesse's face darkened. I blushed. "Yeah," I said, turning back to my mom. "He just transferred here. I had to baby-sit his little brother when they were here this summer." I poked at my chicken teriyaki. "I guess he's here for the year." I glanced up at Jesse who was still standing, staring at me, behind Doc's chair. I took a swig of my grapefruit juice, then stood up. "You know what? I'm not that hungry. I think I'll just go upstairs and do some homework."

I grabbed my plate and pushed my way into the kitchen. Jesse materialized in front of me. "Jeez, Jesse, don't do that." I tossed the rest of my dinner in the garbage, and then stuck my plate in the dishwasher. I avoided looking at Jesse as best I could. But God, he was mad. You could totally tell he was, too, because the cabinets around us were shaking.

"Susannah," Jesse said. "Why didn't you tell me Paul was here?" When I didn't answer him, he grabbed my arm and forced me to look up at him.

My lip trembled. "I. I was afraid that you'd get mad," I said dumbly, shrinking back from him. Normally, I wouldn't have minded. Jesse touching me, I mean. But right then, he was making me very uncomfortable.

I guess he saw this, because his expression softened. "Susannah, why would you agree to. how did your mother put it? Ah, yes, go out with this boy?" He took my chin in his hand and lifted my face to look up at his. "Susannah, he tried to kill you. How could you possibly want to go out with him?"

"Well, he didn't exactly try to kill me." I said, all too aware of how much my voice was quivering. "I mean, he just-"

"Susannah," Jesse interrupted, getting angry again. "Listen to me, all right? This boy. Paul. he's dangerous. He has secrets that you don't want to learn about." He let go of me and began to pace. "He'll hurt you, do you understand?" He leveled his gaze at me. "Susannah-"

I held up my hand. "Jesse, I'm a big girl, okay? I can take care of myself." I stuffed my hands in my pockets. "And I can chose who my boyfriends are. You can't do that for me."

Jesse stared at me. "Susannah, I-"

I pushed passed him, marching toward the door. "Mind your own business, Jess. Okay? This doesn't concern you." Then, feeling sick to my stomach, I left the kitchen and ran up to my room.

Look, don't get me wrong, okay? I love Jesse. I really do. It's just that. well, I knew Jesse was right. About Paul being dangerous, I mean. But what was I supposed to do? I couldn't just say, You know what, Jesse? You're right. I should tell Paul to get lost. That wouldn't work at all. I mean, if I did that, what was I going to find out? That I had no backbone? I didn't have much of a choice. And when it was over, I'd apologize to Jesse. That is, if it was ever over.

Somehow I made it through the next day. I didn't see Jesse, and I got the feeling that, even if I did, I wouldn't have known what to say to him.

I didn't see Paul either, as it turned out. At least, not until after lunch. He came in late to English, interrupting Miss Rice during her "fascinating" description of the definition some word that I had known since my freshman year.

After class I met up with Paul in the hall.

"Hey," I said, grabbing the sleeve of his shirt. He stopped and looked at me. For the first time, his confident smile was slow coming. But before I could make anything of it, it was back on his face.

"Hey, Suze," he greeted.

I swallowed. "Hey, where were you earlier? I didn't see you at homeroom or anything." I tried to make my tone sound nonchalant, but I knew it was a little squeaky. For some reason the fact that he had let his guard down, even for just a second, had unnerved me. In some weird way I thought of it as sort of the normal thing for him to always be self-confident and knowing.

Paul shrugged. "I had business to take care of," he informed me. He left it at that, like that was all I needed to know. He took my arm-which, can I just say, made me feel like I was a little girl, being led around the school? I fought down the urge to jerk my arm away from Paul.

I could feel my skin crawl as we made our way through the throngs of people. I caught more than a few girls glancing at us as we passed them. I glanced up at Paul, noting the way he scanned the hallway, nodding to various people as we passed. He made it seem like there was nothing going on right then, but I knew better. My stomach twisted into a knot and I tried to remove my arm from Paul's grasp. He tightened his hold on me and steered me toward my locker.

"I can get there on my own, you know," I mumbled to him as we came to a stop.

Paul gritted his teeth a moment, then smiled at me. It almost passed as a sincere smile, except I could see the fire in his blue eyes. I took a step back from him, trying not to show how afraid of him I was right then. I hate being scared and I wasn't about to show my fear to a guy who planned- at least, I think he was planning-to kill me.

"Look, Suze, I'm having a very bad day right now, all right?" I turned and started to open my locker as he talked. "I would really appreciate it if you would just work with me here, all right?"

I glanced at him, raising my eyebrows. "What could have possibly been so bad about your day?" I closed my locker, and started down the hall again, Paul close behind me.

Paul grunted. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you." He gave a small smile, then veered off and went in the opposite direction.

I should have realized then that something was wrong. But I didn't. I just pushed it off as something having to do with a ghost. That's what mediators were supposed to deal with, anyway. At least, I assumed Paul was a mediator.

I just didn't know how right I was.