"Its Too Late"

By: Poison
Rated: G

Viper stared across the small space she had been sharing for weeks staring, taking in his slight frame so filled with power and confidence. She turned quickly away shutting her eyes more afraid of herself and her reactions then him catching her staring, she fancied he might even like that. Instead she opened her eyes and stared out into the raining night.  Listening to it tap a steady beat against the building, the rain had been pouring buckets for the last few days infiltrating everything, the rain's beat had become her heartbeat and the rain had seeped into her thoughts, her dreams, her emotions blurring everything.  Nothing seemed clear anymore, like…they were hidden behind the rain that fought so desperately to claw its way inside.

The two occupants of the room had given up on speaking the days and days before, there was too much awkwardness...too much sadness really…and regret.  She sighed audibly wishing to be out of the room, it had grown to feel almost claustrophobic.  But she knew there was nothing either of them could do. They had been quarantined; it wasn't like they could magically get better. She looked at the wall counting the marks on the wall that told the total days they had been stuck in the sick room, 12 days, it seemed like so much longer. She stood up suddenly startling the boy out of his own thoughts.

"Now what?" he asked looking at her irritated.

"Nothin' jus' stretchin' my legs," she responded and began to walk the perimeter of the room trying to keep herself sane and to keep her comment from being a lie.  She needed to stop thinking…stop wondering… she doubted she could by the amount of time she had spent trying to find a way to do just that. 

They couldn't be kept in here too much longer could they?  They had been there for awhile * any ways *.  She sighed softly feeling almost like her becoming sick at the same time * he * had become sick was some kind of criminally insane way to torture her.  He wasn't even supposed to be in Manhattan…he wasn't supposed to be in such close quarters with her, where she could weaken and blurt out everything.  About how she had loved him since she had first seen him, how she had made a mistake blasting off about how much he made her sick, that she wished he would just drown in the river and leave her alone.  She hadn't meant it…not really…but how else was she supposed to react when her heart was breaking into pieces so small they could fit in a thimble.  He had been her lifeline, her reason to strive for excellence; all he had said was that she was dragging him down from his post.  He had seemed so reserved…more so then usual.  Not that she knew what he was like usually anymore…yet she did, cranky and probably bored just like her.  But at least she had the grace to refrain from taking it out on him.

She had spent the first days in the room sick out of her mind, when she had begun to recover she had tried to carry on a conversation, just to break the monotony in the room, but it never got very far though.  She couldn't decide if that was a good or a bad thing. In the end though she decided it was a good thing, no chance of things unforgivable to be said.

She finished walking the perimeter and dropped down in a corner across from him, where the shadows seemed deep enough to swallow her whole, leaving her with her thoughts that blurred and ran together.  She recalled the last conversation that had been had in this room and how she had spoken little, and even then almost as if in riddle leaving him to decipher the meaning of her words.  She looked back across the room and saw that the shadows had changed, turning his face into a play of grays and blacks, the more she stared and concentrated the more his face seemed to blur. Looks like the rain even got to him, turning him into pieces of shadows. 

She stood up swiping a blanket off the bed nearest to her and went back to her corner that was full of shadows. If he had indeed become a shadow then perhaps she would see him in the shadows she called dreams.  She wrapped the blanker tightly around her shivering.

"Good-night," she said softly as was their nightly ritual.  One of them would say goodnight and the other would respond in kind.  It seemed like the only time either of them spoke with nothing shadowing the words.  The words always seemingly laced either with threats or sarcasm, sometimes even anger; but at the end of the day it was always the same, the same ritual they preformed like ridiculous puppets in the world's demented play.

"Good-night," he responded equally as soft as he shifted slightly in his seat making his face appear suddenly in the moonlight.  She looked down clenching her hands together before she was caught staring.  She heard him getting up and the scraping of him retrieving something from the closet.  Then legs appeared in front of her, his legs,

"I's saw you shivah…figured yous were cold…" he said explaining himself shoving the blanket he carried in a bundle off his own bed at her, "Don't want yous getting' sick again. I's tired a dis room."

Viper had to laugh slightly at his comment, * he * was tired of this room? She was the incarnate of a free spirit; she hated not having the air around her buoying her and her spirit up.  Yet she had, though she hadn't had much of a choice, the other boarders didn't want to risk getting sick, so she had been locked up in the sick room with the epitomy of her loathe and love. 

She took the blanket gratefully and gave him a small smile she wasn't even sure he could see in the darkness before wrapping herself in the second blanket.

"I'll remember dat if we's evah get outta 'ere dat yous dislike da Man'attan sickroom," she said her voice thick with disdain and paused before continuing, "Thanks…"

He nodded and moved away to huddle in the jacket he had gotten out of the closet. Seemingly unaware of her comment that she knew he had heard, she had learned to read his body, the way he tensed up when someone said something he thought was un-called, he had reacted that way to her comment.  Viper sighed giving up on contemplating the intricacies of herself and him and fell asleep against the wall feeling warmer then any of the days in here that she could remember…not that she could remember the first week too well, she had been too delirious to take any account of her surrounding. She was certain her tally marks on the wall were off by quite a few days, but in reality she didn't want to know that so she never asked how many days they had been in there when one of the Manhattan newsies came in to give them food.  Usually it was Racetrack who had already been sick and gotten over it.  Sometimes he stayed for a short amount of time conversing with both of them, but more often then not he dropped off the food and said a cursory hello before heading out the door again. 

She woke a few hours before dawn, as thunder seemed to roll through the small room dominating it with its boisterous voice.  She shivered slightly inspite of the blankets tightly wrapped around her, she had never been particularly fond of, at least not while being in buildings, out in the open on the street or even a roof a storm could be majestic and awe inspiring, but also dangerous and cruel.  She looked over to the sleeping form that was snoring lightly in the corner.  She untangled herself from the blankets and got up heading to the bathroom, when she emerged she noticed he was awake and staring at her, she couldn't * see * him exactly, but she could feel his eyes on her. She turned glaring at the corner he was leaned up against,

"What?" she demanded finally as the silence stretched out between them. Staring back at him willing him to be the one to look away, for just * once *, but she knew in the very same instant that his pride wouldn't allow it.  She sighed again being the one to look away as it was everytime,

"What?" she repeated sounding slightly defeated, "have yous thought a more things ta tell me dat yous shoa I's need ta know?  Like 'ow big a bitch I am when I's bein' broken up with by da guy I's prolly gonna love fo-" she shut up suddenly looking slightly shocked and closed her mouth.

Out of the darkness his voice emerged, "Yous don't love me, yous jus' want ta feel safe, I's got news foh ya, no one's eva safe."

"I * know * that," she replied irritated that perhaps he had been right…Oh, screw this, stop being such a muttonhead. She looked back to where his face should be and where the strongest sense of 'staring' was and swallowed slightly before continuing,

"I cain't take dis anymore," she began and cut him off hearing him talk a breath in to speak, "jus' shut up an' listen."  She paused to make sure no more outbursts would happen and crossed her legs more falling then sitting on the floor. 

"I's cain't do dis anymore, I's tried ta drown meself in my misery, I's jus' barely 'oldin' on, I's * want * ta fall apart, do somethin' but I's cain't, it'd satisify yous too much an' I's don't want ta be da one ta do dat.  Yous made yous decision an' I know I's said ridiculous things but, dat was me reactin' ta yous.  I's tired a waitin' for yous ta come ovah an' talk, or for yous ta jus' stay away.  But I's guess I's ain't evah gonna get me wish, I's stuck with yous in dis room till dey," She jerked her head in the direction of the door looking faintly displeased, "decide ta let us out."  She was indeed tired of it all, but she knew that without a doubt he would always have a place for him in her heart, regardless of if she wanted him to or not.

She finished her speech expelling the left over breath in her lungs with a woosh and suddenly seemed smaller.  She stood up again and headed back to her corner and peeled one of the blankets out of the tangle of blankets and threw it in the general direction that he was in.  She heard him sigh and stand up picking the blanket up off the floor on his way over to her.  He stood there for a moment highlighted by a flash of lightning making her jump slightly at the un-expectedness of it.  That reaction seemed to settle it and he sat down next to her leaning against the wall.  He opened his mouth to speak and she cut him off,

"Don't," she said closing her eyes as if to block out what he planned to say.  She knew she couldn't stop whatever it was he wanted to say from being said but she could at least try…however weakly it was.

"No," he said softly, "I need ta say dis…" she stopped as if regretting his decision and then plunging on with determination. "I'm nothin' more den a lil boy inside dat cries out foh attention.  Though I's always try ta 'ide be'ind me role as leadah," he sighed and looked as if he was looking for the words to speak, "I's don't know 'ow I feel about yous...or dis 'ole situation we's in…but I know I'll do da right t'ing eventually."  He turned his head to look at her just as they heard the doorknob turning and a cheerful Blink stick his head into the room,

"'Ey, I's thought I's should tell yous, it was decide dat yous can come outta 'ere now."  He smiled even more seeing the two of them sitting side by side thinking that the two had made amends with each other.  He didn't understand the situation at all…he never would be able to.  Viper stood up from her corner emerging out into the light shed through the open doorway.

"Thanks," she said and stepped out into the hallway and looked back into the room at the form sitting on the floor looking lost and alone, "Go home Spot, it's too late foh us."  Then she turned around and walked back to the bunkroom where safeness radiated and danger all the same.  But it was the type of danger she could handle.