Is it any wonder why I'm scared,

If I was a little younger would I

care,

feeling like the walls are growing stronger,

I don't know if this cage can hold me any longer

you never dreamed you'd have to love your life so guarded,

cause they'll find a way to make you feel discarded

I'm not afraid of tomorrow,

I'm only scared of myself,

feels like my insides are on fire, and I'm looking through the eyes of someone else

SR-71- "Tomorrow"



Caradhras

At dusk, the Company set their sights to the east and began the slow climb upward. They slowly marched up, winding their way into the hills. With each rising and setting of the sun, Celebruthiel would stand transfixed, staring at the mountain as it glowed red. The beauty of it left her speechless.

""I have doubts about the weather that is coming up behind,"" Gandalf said as the Company waited silently for the sun to set, waiting for Celebruthiel to move. After the first night they had discovered she would not budge until she was ready.

"Then may I suggest we each gather a faggot of wood to carry as there are still some trees and bushes here. A fire may be the only thing that keeps us from freezing, which would certainly not help our cause."

""Very well," Gandalf conceded. "But we must not use the wood- not unless it is a choice between fire and death.""

So as Celebruthiel watched the setting sun, the rest of the Company gathered wood, Legolas collecting enough for two. Once the sun had set, they continued on.

Pippin moved in step beside Celebruthiel. She smiled down at him, always grateful for the little Hobbit's presence, as he never failed to lighten her mood.

"Why do you stop to watch the sunset?" he asked curiously. He found himself fascinated by her, drawn to her beauty and grace, and the sense of peace that she seemed to exude, as if her destiny was already written and she had accepted what was to be.

"If you listen very closely, you can hear the voices, lamenting the sun's rays. And in the morning, they rejoice as the first rays of light fall on them. It's a beautiful sound," she replied wistfully.

The next morning, hours after the group had stopped to rest, Pippin crawled over to where Celebruthiel sat as the sun slowly began to streak across the dark sky. He took Celebruthiel's hand and the two sat silently, watching, listening. Pippin thought he heard the sound she had described even though his hobbit hears weren't sensitive enough to hear the melody.

So for the next two days and two nights, Pippin would stand silently beside Celebruthiel, hand in hand, watching the sun.

"What is that fool doing?" Gandalf questioned to no one in particular, though Aragorn and Legolas were the only ones in hearing range, standing on either side of him. "He can't possibly hear whatever it is that she does."

"He does not need to hear it to understand," Legolas stated, watching the Elf and Hobbit standing so close it was difficult to tell where one ended and the other began. "They bring joy to each other. That is all that matters."

"Humph," was Gandalf's reply as he turned away.

"You still bring her joy," Aragorn said softly, filling the space Gandalf had occupied.

"I am not jealous of the Hobbit if that is what you insinuate," Legolas bit out.

"I did not," Aragorn protested. Though Legolas had been acting more quiet than usual, Aragorn would never presume to think an Elf was jealous of a Hobbit. It was a ridiculous statement.

Legolas shook his head. "Maybe I am. Though not in the way you might think." He paused, looking away from the two as if the sight hurt his eyes. "I can not give her what she needs because I am not at peace with her presence here." He shook his head again sadly then walked away from Aragorn.

****

On the third day, the sky turned dark and the sun was hidden. Then the snow began, lightly at first. Soon it was falling quickly, blanketing the earth, and Pippin, who walked beside Celebruthiel, was having a difficult time staying on his feet. It amused Celebruthiel to listen to Gimli grumbling in front of her until the wind picked up and she could barely hear him any longer.

They were walking up a steep stretch and Celebruthiel reached out grabbing Pippin. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a Hobbit loose his footing. She had thought it was Pippin, because he was the closest to her. So she was surprised when she looked down and received a questioning glance from him. Then she heard Sam call out to Frodo. Celebruthiel turned to find Frodo had slipped and would have probably taken a nasty tumble if Aragorn hadn't grabbed hold of him as he rolled past. She thought nothing of it and started to turn back to the front when she noticed the sun reflect off something in Boromir's hand.

"Boromir," Aragorn warned as Boromir stood holding Frodo's gold chain on which was the Ring.

Boromir starred at it as if mesmerized as the Ring swayed back and forth from the end of the chain. "It is a strange fate. For which should suffer so much fear and doubt. One so small a thing. Such a little thing."

"Boromir! Give the ring to Frodo," Aragorn now commanded. Celebruthiel could feel the tension around her rise like a thick coat of dust. She noticed Aragorn's hand slowly creep to the hilt of his sword and knew he was prepared to do whatever it took to make sure the Ring was returned to Frodo. Celebruthiel also knew that if Aragorn wasn't, she would see the deed done.

Boromir slowly walked toward Aragorn and Frodo. "As you wish." Boromir held the Ring out to Frodo, who snatched it quickly and immediately returned the chain around his neck. "I care not." Boromir said with a laugh as he reached out and ruffled Frodo's hair. Then he turned his back on the two and joined the rest of the fellowship.

Everyone ignored what had just occurred like it hadn't happened. And so they continued on their long trek up the snow-covered mountain. By the end of the third day, the snow had turned menacing. Gandalf led the Company, plowing his way through the waist deep trenches. Boromir followed, carrying Pippin and Merry under his arms. Gimli followed slowly leading Bill, for even he was having a difficult time trudging after Boromir, even though the bigger man had cut a path to follow. In the rear was Aragorn, carrying Frodo and Sam. Celebruthiel and Legolas were the only two unaffected by the snow, as their steps were so light, they leaped on top of it and did not sink like the others.

Periodically shrill cries and howls could be heard, followed by rocks and boulders crashing on their path. Finally they halted, as even Boromir and Aragorn were having difficulties making their way. They gathered under an outcropping, which managed to offer some protection from the blinding snow and driving winds.

Celebruthiel was beginning to worry about the Hobbits, and was glad Boromir had suggested each member carry extra wood. She was certain it was the only thing that would keep them from freezing now that they were all still. After several members tried to light fire to wood without success, Gandalf was finally given no option but to do it himself.

"Well I have just written a sign that says Gandalf Was Here. But I guess it can't be helped," he muttered as he used his staff to spark the wood. Soon a fire blazed, much to the relief of all.

Pippin cuddled up beside Celebruthiel. She put her arm around his little body, letting him seek her warmth as she leaned against Legolas, seeking more than just warmth. She needed his reassurance, the safety she normally found in his arms. Legolas pushed her head onto his shoulder.

"Idh melethen (Rest, my love)," he whispered in her ear. "Im si (I am here)."

Not much time had passed, when Pippin said softly, "Celebruthiel, I am hungry."

"Gandalf, we must do something," Boromir said. "This will be the death of the halflings if we don't do something to save ourselves."

"Give this to them. It is miruvor. Elrond gave it at our parting," Gandalf said as he passed a flask to Boromir. As it was passed around, each member felt revived.

It was not long before Legolas stood from his spot beside Celebruthiel. He stopped out from under the outcropping.

"There is a fell voice on the wind," he shouted above the roaring wind.

"It is Saruman," Gandalf yelled as he too jumped up and moved past Legolas, standing on the edge of the cliff.

"He's trying to bring down the mountain! Gandalf, we must turn back," Aragorn yelled over the wind.

"No!! Losto Caradhras, sedho, hodo, nuitho i 'ruith! (Sleep Caradhras, be still, lie still, hold your wrath!)" Gandalf called out as he waved his arms.

As he spoke, a terrifying bolt of lightening hit the mountain above them. A loud rumble followed, and Legolas pulled Gandalf from the edge as the shelter above them gave way and a large amount of snow slid down the mountain, burying the entire party. Legolas was the first to emerge, followed by Celebruthiel. Since she had a hold on Pippin before the avalanche, she found him easily enough and pulled him up with her. The rest of the Company emerged hands first from what could have been their snowy tomb.

"We must get off this mountain," Aragorn yelled.

"No, we must keep going," Gandalf insisted.

"Let us head for the Gap of Rohan," Boromir suggested. "If we stay here it will be our death."

"The Gap of Rohan is out of the question. It would be us too close to Isengard. We must avoid that place at all costs," Gandalf insisted, glancing at Celebruthiel. It would be like personally delivering to him his two most heart felt desires.

"Then let us head for Moria. My cousin Balin would give us a fitting welcome," Gimli declared, the longing apparent in his eyes.

There were only three in the party who did not want to go that way: Gandalf, Legolas, and Celebruthiel. Neither Elf wanted to set foot underground. Celebruthiel did not begrudge the Dwarves their life, but she did not want to visit it either. And Gandalf, he had other reasons for wanting to avoid Moria.

"Let the Ringbearer decide," Gandalf finally said, though it pained him to do so.

Frodo seemed to weigh the choices carefully, studying the faces of those around him. Finally he made his decision. "We will go through the Mines."

"So be it," Gandalf mumbled even though the fear in the pit of his stomach protested for the decision had been made.

Celebruthiel also wanted to scream and had to suck in her breath to prevent from doing so when Frodo stated his decision. Instead she said," Let Legolas and I go ahead. We will try to find a negotiable path back down the mountain."

The rest of the group thought this a good idea so the two set off, springing across the snow, down the mountain. They split up halfway down, each taking a different route. Celebruthiel quickly went back to the spot they had separated, as her direction would be of no use to them. Legolas kept going until he reached the spot that the snow thinned. Then he returned to Celebruthiel's side and the two returned to the Company together. So Legolas led the Company down Caradhras while the two Men carried the Hobbits until the snow thinned and it was easier to walk. Once they had reached the bottom, Celebruthiel spared one glance backwards. Caradhras had defeated them.