Me again. Are ya sick of me yet? I hope you guys like the chapters. I'm trying not to make them boring, but I'm not sure if it's working. I'm basically writing on impulse, meaning that I really don't know what's gonna happen half the time in my fics. Being impulsive and random is good, so for those of you who haven't read my other fics, now you know. I'm impulsive. I never have a plan for anything^.^ Well…sometimes, but not my writing. It's just a bunch of random ideas that I try to link together.
And I have to say THANK YOU right now, because I must say that I am enjoying writing for this section more so than any other section out there, even if I don't get as many reviews as I did for a few of my other fics. I understand, because this is a HUGE section compared to what I'm used to. (mainly, the zoids section.) And I need to THANK YOU again, because when I write romance fics, I usually enjoy prolonging romances. I believe that romance through angst is good^.^ Am I right? And I'm really happy to not get any reviews saying things like 'where's the romance?', 'when are they gonna kiss?'. 'why aren't they a couple yet?', and 'I'm still waiting for them to get together.' The longest I ever went without making a couple an official couple was…15 chapters. Now it's been…20, and I'm still not at that point.
And yes, I think it's time for a little romance in my fic^.^ Fluff is good!
So what am I trying to say exactly? It's simple. Thank you for not yelling at me to 'hurry up with the romance already.' Every review related to that has just been very nice and I agree. It's been too long. So, arigatou!
Disclaimer: I have…4 dollars! Yay! I'm making progress! But what happened to the other 16 dollars of my allowance? Uh…can you say Lifehouse CD and Bottlecaps (the candy)? Yeah…that's where my money went. Anyway, I don't own Inuyasha.
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*There are those who don't believe in fate. They believe in their own path, their own lives. Perhaps these people are truly better off. They aren't bound by anything. They are ignorant. They are free. It may be better that way. You have to forge your own path, otherwise it's not worth it. Nothing is. Fate isn't really controlling, it's leading. It's pushing you somewhere, or more like pulling you. It leads you by the hand until you reach destiny's path. Then you're on your own. You can't do anything while fate leads you, but when you reach destiny, you can do whatever you want. Your life is yours and no one else's. You are the only one who decides what you do. Don't become a follower. Stay true to yourself. If you try to follow someone else's path, you'll end up alone and with nothing. Paths will cross, but nobody walks the same path. Remember that*
It was the middle of the night, and the Inuyasha-tachi wasn't having a very good time. Kagome and Inuyasha were sitting outside of the hut they had found. Kagome was leaning against the railing while Inuyasha was leaning against the wall of the hut. Things had really gotten complicated in the past month. Nothing was going their way. Shippo and Kirara were curled up on the steps leading up to the hut, sound asleep from such an eventful day.
"Oi, Inuyasha?" said Kagome quietly. Inuyasha just looked at her as she turned around to face him. "What do you think…is going to happen to us?" The hanyou simple quirked an eyebrow at her. Kagome understood that he was confused. "I mean…this dream weaver who's after us…Myoga-ji-chan said that she deals with fate…right? And if our fate is to…to die…then we have no choice…we can't defy fate."
"You shouldn't talk like that," said Inuyasha. "I, for one, am not about to give up. What about everything we've done? Look how far we've come, and I'm not about to let some dream weaver, who thinks she can decide when people live and die, mess things up. I don't believe in fate, anyway. I walk my own path and nobody can tell me what to do, no one." Kagome smiled. Inuyasha was speaking with confidence, but it was easy to tell he was a little nervous as well. Did fate exist though? Maybe he was right. She shouldn't be thinking like that. She had to walk her own path. It wasn't that she was fated to help them search for the Shikon no Tama or destroy Naraku. She was doing it because she wanted to, because she wanted to stay with them. So was fate real? She didn't know.
"Arigatou, Inuyasha," she said after a while, a smile on her face. Inuyasha gave her a confused look.
"What for?" he asked, his voice slightly low and confused.
"I'm not going to think about it any more. I'm going to keep going, and whatever happens, happens, ne?" Inuyasha just nodded slowly. Kagome turned back around and looked at the stars. Just then, one shot across the sky. 'A shooting star! I'll make a wish,' she thought to herself. She closed her eyes and placed her hands together, as if in prayer. 'I with for all of us to make it though this, and I mean every single one of us.' She opened her eyes and continued to watch the stars. She wanted them all to stay alive…even the reserved ningen Siria and her cocky friend Cycil. Both of them didn't seem so bad. Maybe things would turn out all right…maybe they'd all be friends later. Kagome smiled at the thought. 'You never know. You just never know.'
******
Inside the hut, Miroku sat on the wooden floor next to Sango, who was lying on a futon. Kagome had treated her wounds the best she could, and now all they could do was wait for her to wake up. Miroku just watched her, a solemn look on his face.
"This is all my fault," he said to her, even if she couldn't hear him. However, she could. She was in a state of unconsciousness, but it wasn't your normal kind. She could hear everything. She was completely aware, but she couldn't wake up or respond. She could just listen. The tone of his voice was so pained it made her cringe. It was so hard to hear him speak like that.
'It's not your fault,' she thought to herself, hoping he could hear, but he couldn't. All she could do was listen and think her responses, in hopes he'd get them.
"If I hadn't been acting so cold to you, I would have noticed the youki and I could have evaded. You shouldn't have taken that hit for me."
'Don't blame yourself, houshi-sama. I wanted to do it. I didn't want to see you die.'
"I just didn't know how to react. I tried so hard to keep everything inside, and then when my soul shattered, I thought I was done for. I thought it was the end of me, but all of you helped me. Did you want me around that badly?"
'We did. I wanted you back. There was no way I would have let you die. I wish you could hear me.'
"It was hard enough to keep in my pain, but even harder to protect me real feelings. And then you, of all people, had to see them. I know what you saw, and I'm afraid of it. If I were to act upon any of my emotions, I would end up hurting you. Please understand when I say that I'm truly sorry."
'Houshi-sama…don't you get it? By holding back, you're hurting me more…what I saw…I want it too.' Sango thought back to that time. Miroku wanted to be with her always. He wanted nothing more than for her to love him. Didn't he understand that she already did? Was he that blind? 'Can't you see? I love you…houshi-sama. I want nothing more than to be with you too. But I can't tell you right now. There's too much pain involved at this moment. I'm glad, though. I'm happy you feel the same way. It's good to know my feeling are returned.'
"How do you feel about me, Sango? Do you hate me?"
'I could never hate you.'
"Are you disappointed in me?"
'Why would I be?'
"Are my feelings even important to you?"
'You have no idea. They're more important to me than anyone's. I want nothing more than to heal your pain. I need to wake up so I can tell you. I need to wake up. Yume…if you're listening…then please…wake me up. Let me wake up!' There was a swirl of colors and then nothing. Suddenly, she could feel her eyes opening and she could see the ceiling of the brown, wooden hut. She heard a happy sigh come from her side. She looked over at Miroku, who was smiling at her.
"I'm glad you're alright," he said. He obviously didn't realize that she had heard everything he had said to her. Maybe it was better right now if she didn't mention it to him.
"What happened?" she asked, although she already knew.
"You were hit with a beam made of youki. Kagome-sama fixed you up."
"I'll have to remember to thank her. What about you? Are you alright?"
"I'm fine." Sango glanced to his ankle, which was still wrapped in bloody bandages. He had reopened the wound.
"Houshi-sama, you should get that fixed up. Look at your ankle." He only nodded.
"I know. I was waiting for you to wake up and I kind of forgot about it. It's alright, nothing serious." Sango just nodded and closed her eyes.
"Houshi-sama? Arigatou."
"For what?"
"For being there when I woke up. It means a lot to me." Miroku simply nodded.
"You were there when I woke up. I'm returning the favor." He gave a smile that only Miroku could pull off. The wall had gone back up. He was the same furyou houshi he had always been. Sango closed her eyes and fell asleep, Miroku still watching over her. 'He'll know eventually. For now, we'll keep it to ourselves. Neither of us need to feel any more pain right now…but eventually…he'll know…eventually.'
******
"Yume!" shouted both Siria and Cycil as they crawled over to their danna. She was lying on the ground, unconscious. Both girls were injured, so they remained on the floor next to Yume. They kneeled on either side of her.
"What do we do?" asked Siria.
"Why are you asking me?" asked Cycil.
"You have experience. What's wrong with her?"
"Maybe these slips have been draining her. And she teleported both of us back here at once. That has to take a lot of energy." Suddenly, Yume's body began to fade.
"What's happening?" asked Siria. Cycil turned Yume over onto her back and looked at the kiseki on Yume's circlet that was on her head. It was fading into a black color.
"Her kiseki is fading…she's dying."
"Nani? We have to do something!" shouted Siria, panicked. She looked at Cycil, who seemed to be thinking.
"We…we can use the kiseki stones," answered Cycil. Siria's eyes went wide with the suggestion.
"Nani? The kiseki?" She looked down at her own stone that resided on her midriff section, embedded in her outfit. "Can we really do that?"
"It's the only thing we can do, however…I don't know what'll happen to us if we do. The kiseki are strange stones."
"Well then, if it's the only way, then lets do it," responded Siria, already pulling hers out. Cycil looked down at her sash around her waist and took hers out as well. She held the stone over Yume's and Siria followed suit. The three stones pulsed and then lit up, sending a blinding white light out that lit up the whole room. The flash soon faded back to darkness and all three women were lying on the ground, unconscious. Siria and Cycil still had hold of their kiseki, and now Yume's was back to its rich gray color. All three of them just lied there, drifting off into their own thoughts.
******
"Inuyasha-sama!" shouted Myoga. He jumped up onto Inuyasha's shoulder. The hanyou didn't even look at him.
"What is it?" he asked.
"Has anything strange happened here?" Kagome and Inuyasha just about fell over.
"What do you think? We're dealing with an enemy we can't even reach, let alone fight! And we keep getting attacked! I don't know, Myoga-jiji, you decide!" Kagome was laughing by now and Myoga just looked away.
"I came here to tell you about something I saw in the forest."
"What was it?" asked Kagome.
"It looked like some kind of tear in the forest, but it was in the middle of nowhere. The tear was through the sky itself. I didn't venture inside, because I wasn't sure what I would find."
"A tear," said Inuyasha, slightly disbelieving.
"Hai. And I know I wasn't seeing things. It was right there. It was a tear in the middle of nowhere, similar to the opening when Sesshoumaru opened your father's grave."
"Interesting," said Kagome. She then remembered something. "Oi, Myoga-ji-chan? Can you tell us more about the six hateshi?"
"Hai, that was another reason I came here. I was doing more research about the hateshi, when I came across another text. It said there were only five of them."
"But you told us there were six hateshi."
"There were," said Miroku, walking out from the hut, using his staff as a walking stick to support his hurt ankle. They all turned to him, awaiting the rest of his answer. "Older scripts say there were six, but newer ones say there were only five. I believe the hateshi might have done it themselves. They were changing around history."
"But why?" asked Kagome. Miroku simply shook his head, signaling that he didn't know.
"There's something different about this dream weaver," said Myoga. "She doesn't seem to leave her own world. It's as if she doesn't want to see the outside world. The other dream weavers were usually present at the deaths they carried out. And the text said something about that. They all had the same youkai help them. She worked with dream weavers all her life. What if she still works for them now? What if she works for Yume?"
"She does," stated Miroku. They all looked to him. "We all know her quite well. I'm sure that in the text, the description given to the youkai that helped them said that she was a human like youkai with bat like wings and crimson eyes. She had golden orange hair and sharp claws. She was a tamashii youkai. She was called the 'devil of the hateshi', and her name is Cycil."
******
"Cycil…" taunted a female voice. It was soft and kind, but there was a coldness to it if you listened close enough. "Come on Cycil. It's time to go." Cycil opened her eyes and looked around at her surroundings. It was dark…pitch-black darkness, to be exact. However, it was quite similar to Yume's room. She could see everything. The room was just black. She began to walk around, looking for the owner of the voice.
"Your name, Cycil. I gave it to you, did I not?"
"Who are you?" asked Cycil, stopping to look around.
"Me? I am one of the six, no…the five hateshi. I'm surprised you would forget me."
"Urasai. I don't know you."
"Cycil…do you remember what your name means? Chokkatsu, Yakunan, Chigiri, Inmetsu, and…life.
"Nani?"
"C, Y, C, I, L. Your name was composed of the things we believed in. The last one, life, was used because Itonami wanted it to be."
"But…I don't remember…I don't want…to remember."
"Cycil…you have no choice. You can't escape the past. Just give in. Let me show you. Let me show you what you were like when you were under my control." The scene suddenly switched to that of a village that was burning. People were running for their lives. The village had been doomed from the beginning. They were rallying together to overthrow a kingdom to the north. However, they were fated to die, and so their village was attacked.
"Run! It's the devil of the hateshi!" shouted a village man.
"She's already slaughter 200 men!" shouted another. A beam of youki traveled through the village, destroying whoever got in its way. The village erupted into more flames. In the middle of it stood Cycil, who suddenly lunged forward and swiped her claws at an unsuspecting villager. The villagers didn't know what hit them until they were already dead. Cycil's main weapon was her speed. She also had the power to back it up. She spread her wings and flew above the village, where she launched off even more blasts of youki. Soon enough, they were all dead. The scene vanished, being replaced with the forest and an army, which was running for their lives.
"She's coming!" they shouted. Suddenly, sharp claws dug into their leader's back. He fell instantly, and in his place was Cycil. The men stopped and turned around, but she lunged and swiped at them, taking out three in one swipe. She launched herself at the rest and began tearing them up, their blood soaking her hands. Once she was done, she just stood there, looking over the corpses. Something didn't feel right.
"Make it stop!!" Suddenly, the scene faded back to the black room. Cycil was on her knees, her hands over her ears. She had a splitting headache. "Make it stop…please, make it stop."
"Do you understand? That's who you truly are. You are nothing more than a youkai, made for killing humans."
"Iya. I won't kill them unless I have a reason to."
"They are humans. That is reason enough."
"Iya! Siria is a human, and I would never hurt her!"
"How can you be so sure?"
"Nani?"
"Never say never, Cycil. You are a youkai, and you will always be one. The human world will shun you and fear you. You can't relate to them."
"Urusai…urusai! Leave me alone! You can't tell me who I am and what will happen to me. It's my life. I'm me, and I will always be me. You can't change that. I know who I am, but do you? Just who are you?"
"I…"
"You don't even know. You don't even have a shape, or a form. You don't have eyes to see what you're doing. You don't even exist! This is my mind, and the only one who can be here is me, so leave."
"Demo…"
"I said leave! Ima! Itoma!" And with that, she was left alone in the darkness, a smile on her face. No one was going to tell her who she was…no one.
******
Siria walked quietly through the forest, hoping to find a village to stay at. Her mind was whirling and her head hurt. She couldn't remember anything. Her name was Siria, but was that really her name? She couldn't remember. There were two familiar faces clouding her thoughts. Two boys, both with dark hair, but one with green eyes and one with dark eyes. Who were they? She could have sworn that she had known their names a while ago. But now she couldn't remember anything. It was all very blurry. She soon came upon a small village where an old woman was working in a field. She was singing a song that soon reached the ears of Siria. It was beautiful, and somewhat familiar. She walked over to the woman and just stood there, waiting to be acknowledged. The woman looked up at her after some time and smiled.
"Why hello miss. Are you new around here?" she asked in a friendly voice.
"I guess I am. I really can't remember. But that song you were singing…what was it?"
"Hmm? Oh that? It was a song from long ago. Beautiful, isn't it?"
"Hai, very beautiful."
"It's a song for the people." Something was triggered inside of Siria.
"I song…for the people. Could you…sing it again?"
"I'd be happy to." Siria waited as the woman cleared her throat and began the song again.
"Louvem! madrugada
Alma bela, dança da terra
Ó sintam, o vendaval da coragem
Transbordem, leite da terra
Beijo do céu, chuva do rejubilo
uma semente peguena, desejo
grande grande grande..." Siria listened intently. It was all so familiar. The verse was repeated and Siria began to sing with it, only she sang it differently.
""Praise! Daybreak
Beautiful soul, dance of earth
Oh feel! The windstorm of courage
Overflow! Earth's milk
Kiss from the sky, re-jubilation's rain
A small seed of desire
Great, great, great…" The older woman watched Siria sing with her, only instead, Siria was singing what the song meant. The woman smiled and began the last part of the song.
"Cultivem, um caminho novo caminho
Festejem, Ceifem, um milhão
de espigas, as espigas do destino
Cantem, a nossa canção
Transmitam, canção do povo
força cordial porta da esperança..." Siria listened to the last part and knew that she had never heard it before. Once the woman was done, there was something Siria had to know.
"What does that mean? That last part?"
"So you've never heard the full song before, have you?"
"Iya. Only that one part."
"Well then, I'd be happy to tell you." She cleared her throat again and began.
"Crops, a brand new way
Celebrate, harvest, a million
New dreams, dreams of the destiny
Sing, our song
Transmit, people's songs
Cordial force, door of hope…" Siria listened intently and then nodded. She would never forget that song. Something in the back of her mind told her that she had heard it before. She knew she had, but she couldn't remember where she had heard it from or who had sang it for her.
"So, where are you heading, miss?" asked the woman.
"I don't know. I guess I really don't have a place to go."
"Then why not stay here? You can stay with me at my place." Siria smiled. Maybe she could finally have a home. Something told her that she wanted this, but there was a nagging in the back of her mind that told her that this had happened before, and nothing good would come of it.
******
"Yume Yamazakura," said a voice. Yume was sitting in her thrown in her room. She looked around, but didn't find the source of the voice.
"Who are you?" she asked the darkness.
"Yume…you are a disgrace to dream weavers…to the hateshi."
"Nani?"
"You don't believe in what we do. You don't understand what it means to be a hateshi."
"No, it's you who doesn't understand," retorted Yume.
"Nani?"
"You think that being one of the hateshi is a gift? Don't make me laugh. You don't understand anything. The other hateshi were the fools, not me. They were the disgraces. They enjoyed doing what they did. They enjoyed watching people die at the hands of Cycil, who they mercilessly controlled. Her hands didn't deserve to be soaked in blood like that."
"It's the fate of a youkai to be bathed in the blood of humans."
"Iya! You're wrong. Fate. That's all I ever heard. It's fate. I'm a dream weaver, I am fate, so don't lecture me about it. It wasn't Cycil's fate that covered her hands in blood, it was the will of the hateshi. They did it to her. Their own pathetic beliefs led them to do that to her. They used her to kill for them."
"Isn't that what you do?"
"I'm different. I don't control her. If she doesn't want to do it, I won't make her. I would never force her against her own will, because that would be destroying her. She's been through so much pain and is finally finding a little peace here with me and Siria. Leave us all alone."
"You can't be left alone, hateshi."
"Urusai! I'm not like them. I'm not like the other hateshi. Did you ever stop to think that maybe I was different? That perhaps I had other motives? I don't want to kill anyone, but fate calls for it, and I must obey. The hateshi? I don't care about them. I don't care if they didn't consider me one of them. I don't want that name anymore. I don't want to be associated with those soulless puppets. They aren't worth it. I don't want to be given the title they carried. I am me, not them. I am Yume Yamazakura, and I'm not about to give up my name for the title of hateshi. A dream weaver? That's what I am, but I don't want to be."
"Demo…"
"I said Urusai! Even if I'm just a dream weaver, I'm still me. I'll always be me, no matter what happens. You can't take that away from me. No one can. Now leave me alone. I have work to do."
******
"Miroku-sama, how's Sango-chan doing?" asked Kagome.
"She woke up a little while ago and then went back to sleep. She'll be fine. Don't worry," he responded. They all sat out on the porch of the hut, looking up at the stars. None of them were very tired right now and they weren't exactly sure why.
"Well, we should probably get that wound fixed up, ne?" she said happily. Miroku looked down at his leg. The gash had been quite long, but it was deeper near his ankle. From all of the running he had done to get Sango here, he had torn it open.
"It doesn't hurt that much. I'm alright," he insisted.
"Miroku-sama, you have to get it healed up. If you leave it like that, it might get infected." Miroku sighed. She was right.
"Very well. I'll do it myself. Where are the bandages?"
"Right here," said Shippo, handing him the medical box.
"Arigatou, Shippo," he said, taking the box. He walked back into the hut with the box to fix up his leg. Kagome watched him walk off through the door. She smiled. Yume had said there was a chance he wouldn't be the same after they fixed his soul like that, but he seemed to be the same Miroku they all knew and loved. Nothing had changed. She smiled again and then looked up at the stars. The miko smiled as another shooting star shot through the sky. Everything would be all right. She knew it. They would make it through, because they weren't following fate. They were walking their own path, and nothing was going to get in their way. Nothing could stop them. She was certain.
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I'm…well, I don't know what I am. Oh yeah! I'm gonna put up another Inuyasha fic soon…as soon as I decide which one. There's too many. What do you guys think? Should I put up one of my AU fics, or a different one? Please! I need help! I someone is willing to help me decide, then please email me. I need feedback!…and more people to talk to.
Furyou –delinquent
Chokkatsu –direct control, believed by the hateshi suteki
Yakunan –evil, misfortune, believed by the hateshi Ichimu
Chigiri –Destiny, vow, promise, believed by hateshi Anjerasu
Inmetsu –destruction, depression, believed by hateshi Rekisuu
Life was believed by Itonami, because her name means life. I did this because first off, there is no "L" in the Japanese language. And as for the name "Cycil", I made it this way, with those words, to show that her and Siria, along with the hateshi, will always be intertwined. With me, you always have to search for the bigger meaning.
Ima –now
Itoma –leave
Well, that's it for now. I know, I said there'd be romance, but I can see there wasn't much of it…or maybe there was…I'm confused. Usually, what I think is romance and what others consider romance are two different things. I like Romance though angst, like I've already said. And I also like prolonging romances, so hang tight. It'll come eventually.
Bye for now^.^
