Here lies Chapter Five, in which there is an argument and people invent a joke called Good Morning.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything involving Star Trek. When I'm done, Paramount may not want to, either.

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That night, Ensign Kate Barem walks into the rooms to see Tuvok at that ^$# desk. He doesn't look up. She drops the padd that Tom gave her, titled Coexisting with Vulcans, on a low Starfleet-ebony table. *Didn't know Starfleet made coffee tables.* Exchanging her soft ship boots for even more comfortable (and unregulation, which is the point) slippers, she walks over to the desk. And if there is a bit of a lilt in the walk, her subconscious is the same as other women's, and doesn't really get the lines she has (multiple times in the past day) laid out for it, involving "officer" and "no."

From a distance suitable between ensign and ranking officer, and a posture that is slightly not, she can see little of what is on the padd in front of him. "What are you doing?" *Can I sit in your lap?*

"Geometrics homework."

*?* "Can I help?"

"I am teaching the class."

*I knew that.* Sigh. Well, she's not really that tired, and boredom has never been a prospect she liked very much. I mean, why else to join Starfleet? "In that case, can I brush up on my spatials?"

"If you wish." He pushes a padd across the desk to her, a clear invitation to sit on the other side of the desk. He is a bit stilted, (yes, I know he's a Vulcan, but even so) because one, she is attractive, and two she is obviously attracted to him. However, she seems to be doing an unusualy good job of covering it.

*It is the third, really. Uncommon, if pleasant*

Three, she was being polite, respectful, not in the all overawed, and clearly capable of the equations she was peering at. As well as not obviously trying to seduce him. Which, to the man actually voted "Most Wanted Man" by the female crew in one of Mr. Neelix's *irritating!* morale- building activities, was a welcome change.

(Not _obviously,_ you poor Vulcan.)

It is good that Vulcans are not overly susceptible to inordinate inflation of the ego.

~*~

From the other side of a wide desk, Kate sometimes questions him on a problem. The gray expanse is wide enough that both have to partially rise in order to see the problem at once. After a certain amount of this, Kate moves her chair to a position still not near her commander, but much more convenient, on the adjacent side to the one on which Tuvok is sitting. This goes on for a while, and they talk on minor things as they work. They also think.

*This is pleasant. I was correct in my words to Ensign Paris this morning.*

*I never thought I'd be doing math problems for fun...*

*Perhaps she would be interested in teaching the class next semester. She seems quite capable.*

*I wonder what teaching a class would be like?*

*No... I have no reason to be unkind to her. Some of the students could be abusive to a teacher of her rank.*

*It might be interesting.*

~*~

It was late at night. Over the hours, their chairs had moved by millimeters at a time until, for convenience's sake, they were side-to-side. It was the early hours of the morning, and even Vulcans need... sleep. (coughs)

Tuvok, alerted to the hour by his roommate's yawn, glanced at the clock. An eyebrow raised. "It is late. You shift begins in only four hours... You should go to bed, Ensign."

Kate has been teasing him all night for her own personal enjoyment, because he hasn't really seemed to notice. Why stop now? "Time flies when you're having fun." Sitting that close together, yeah, it's definitely meant to embarrass him.

"That as may be, Ensign, but humans require much more sleep than you will get tonight."

*Ooh. And you thought he didn't notice, did you? A little of my own medicine back, here.*

Or maybe he was innocent. One way to find out. Quizzically, "...Sleep?"

*That was definitely a blush.*

She's been doing this all night. Poor Vulcan. Who can blame him for finally trying to get a little of his own back?

Suggestively, "Yes... sleep." With sleep not really standing for sleep. After a moment of green-faced Vulcan and slightly sunburned human, he rephrases himself.

Rising, he says, "You should retire." He beats a strategic retreat.

~*~

In the safety of his quarters, Tuvok's flush gradually fades. *Saying that was highly illogical.* Although seeing her flush, after an evening of his own, was highly pleasant. On that note, he composed himself and immediately dropped off to whatever section of unconsciousness involves Vulcan sugarplums. (cough cough)

~*~

The next morning, the vagaries of shift assignment dictated that Tuvok woke up first. He showered, dressed, and went to go get breakfast in the Mess Hall. He paused for a moment by the couch.

Kate woke up at that exact moment, probably for the one and only purpose of further confusing and embarrassing him.

"What, you weren't even going to say good morning?" Sitting up, she holds out her arms as if for a hug.

Raising his eyebrows, he makes the obvious reply. "You were asleep."

"You were rude."

"Given my understanding of human culture, I believe that waking you would have been considered a greater rudeness."

_That_ annoyed her. "Oh, stop it with your Vulcan ego and 'human culture' disclaimers. They're illogical."

"Excuse me?" Tuvok has been halted in his tracks, and Kate is just lounging on the couch, teasing him, secure in her invulnerability to logic.

" 'Human customs' are perfectly well known to you. Stop- mmm." She broke off because her mouth had just become otherwise occupied.

Tuvok, much to both his own and Kate's extreme surprise, had leaned down and kissed her. Withdrawing, they each stare at the other in something akin to shock.

*I did not just do that.*

*Wha... ??*

Tuvok broke the gaze first. "Shh." He turned and walked out the door.

Behind him, Kate is (1) in shock, (2) completely confused, and (3) trying to figure out how a Vulcan can be such a good kisser.

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No comment. Please. Yes, I know, OOC. But not as horribly as he could be... riight, never mind.

Just a note to the world: I should _not_ be writing this right now. Because have I mentioned the ow? The pain? The oh-shit-what is going _on?_ Happy extremely confusing V day. If I could find my poetry, I'd tell you to go read it.