A SEIMADEN DETECTIVE STORY

Scene 10

Charon enters and nods curtly at Asubaru, immediately sitting down.

ASUBARU:
"Mr. Charon, as you are already seated we might as well get it
on. You are Mr. Laures' gardener?"

CHARON:
"Yes."

ASUBARU:
"Where were you at the time of the murder?"

CHARON:
"I was in the kitchen, looking for my sister. She wasn't there
so I decided to wait. I had a cup of tea and when she didn't
return after about twenty minutes I went back to water the
flowers."

ASUBARU:
"Did anybody see you there? One of your colleagues, maybe?"

CHARON:
"Not to my knowledge. Lately all of us were quite busy - you
know, with Laures princess calling every other minute."

ASUBARU:
"Very well. The victim - Miss Hilda - it seems like you didn't
think all that well of her. I heard that you are a friend of her
fiancé?"

CHARON:
"That's true. We often talked to each other - that is he whined
about that woman."

ASUBARU:
"He told you that she was betraying him?"

CHARON:
"Of course. And I told him that he should leave the bitch. He
didn't listen to me, though."

ASUBARU:
"Other than that - are there any more reasons for your .
misgivings?"

CHARON:
"As you well know she asked Mr. Laures to have me fired. But if
you think somebody killed her out of dislike I'm not the only
one with a motive."

ASUBARU:
"What do you mean?"

CHARON:
"Well, everybody knows that Tetei, the butler, hated her. He is
fanatically devoted to Mr. Laures and apparently he thought her
to be a bad influence. He never even tried to hide it."

ASUBARU:
"Mr. Tetei, hm? Very well. Is there anything else you can tell
me? Did anything strange happen over the last few days?"

CHARON:
"As I said, everybody was very busy. If that was it I would like
to go now."

ASUBARU:
"Yes, that was all. And please send Mr. Tetei in."

Scene 11

Tetei enters the room, looking calm and businesslike. He isn't impressed by the sight of Asubaru and only nods at him before sitting down.

TETEI:
"You called?"

ASUBARU:
"Yes. There are a few questions I have to ask everybody, so why
don't we just get started?"

Tetei nods again, eyes never leaving Asubaru's face.

ASUBARU:
"Where were you at the time of the murder?"

TETEI:
"In the servant's salon. Mr. Zadei wanted to . discuss some
things with me."

ASUBARU:
"Yes, that's what he said, too. So tell me, what exactly were
you talking about?"

TETEI:
"Nothing important, really. Just little things concerning the
household."

ASUBARU:
"Good. You knew the deceased, I take it?"

TETEI:
"Not very well. She was a guest in this house. I waited on her but that is
all."

ASUBARU:
"A guest. So you expected her to leave soon?"

TETEI:
"I hoped she would. She . didn't fit in. Master Laures was fond of her,
though, so I tried to not let it show."

Tetei tilts his head and looks straight at Asubaru.

TETEI:
"I didn't like her. I wanted her gone. But Master Laures wouldn't
hear any of it so there was nothing I could do. There
really isn't anything else to say. Mr. Zadei will second
everything I just told you. But did you know that our cook, Iria,
has been in love with Master Laures for years now? She kept
hoping he'd notice her but of course it never happened. When Ms.
Hilda arrived she was devastated. If anyone had reason to kill
her it would be her."

ASUBARU:
"Is that so? Well, Mr. Tetei, if that is all you can tell me I guess we are
finished. There isn't anything else, is there?"

TETEI:
"No."

ASUBARU:
"Miss Iria is next. If you could please ask her in?"

TETEI:
"That is my job after all."

Scene 12

Iria enters the room. She smiles at Asubaru, eyes sparkling.

IRIA:
"Hello."

ASUBARU:
"Uhm, welcome. Please let me tell you that at the moment you are no more
a suspect than anyone else in this house. I just want to-"

IRIA:
"Oh, I know. My brother Charon told me all about the questions you ask."

ASUBARU:
"He. he wasn't supposed to do that. How did he get past my men anyway?"

IRIA: "I think he told them he needed my keys to lock the kitchen. But let me
see . at the time of the murder I was outside at the gate. Gerumu was
with me. He is . I guess you could say he is my boyfriend. We were
waiting for a delivery and, well, you know."

ASUBARU:
"Yes . I think I understand. So this Gerumu, the two of you are in love?"

IRIA:
"Oh, I don't know. I like him alright. But, well, he's just a driver and."

ASUBARU:
"And.?"

IRIA:
"I have been in love with Laures ever since I first started working here.
That's what you wanted to hear, isn't it? But let me tell you something
else: I knew he would never chose me. Even before Hilda came here I
knew. I may have tried to delude myself but deep inside I knew.
Killing
her wouldn't have helped me one bit."

ASUBARU:
"No, I guess it wouldn't. But that's not to say you didn't hate her enough
to do it anyway."

IRIA:
"Oh, if you are looking for somebody who hates her I know just the
person. I . I feel bad about telling you because he is just a child but have
you talked to Rabi, Rod's little brother? He . he hates her because he
thinks she is taking away the only family he has left. He used to come to
the kitchen because he felt lonely with only grown-ups around and I gave
him treats so he talked to me. The child . there's something scary about
him."

ASUBARU:
". Then I guess I will have to talk to him. So Miss Iria, is there anything
else you can tell me, any unusual incidents that may be related to the

murder?"

IRIA:
"No. I can go now, can't I? And you will talk to Rabi? Should fetch
him
right away?"

ASUBARA:
"Yes, that would be good. Thank you, Miss Iria."

Scene 13

The door opens and Iria, leads Rabi inside. Asubaru smiles reassuringly at him and nods at Iria, who promptly leaves the room.

ASUBARU:
"So you are Rabi. Thank you for coming here. I know you must be confused
and scared by the things that happened today but there really is no
reason to worry. I am going to find the person that did this to Miss
Hilda."

RABI:
"Stop treating me like a child. I am glad she is dead. She was a bad
person."

ASUBARU:
"W.was she? But Rabi, why are you saying something like that? Wasn't
she supposed to marry your brother."

RABI:
"No! He would never have married her!"

ASUBARU:
"If you say so. But Rabi, there is one thing I really need to know. Where
were you this morning? Have you seen anyone? Maybe somebody was with
you?

RABI:
"I . I was alone. I woke up really early and I climbed out of the window. I
didn't want to see anyone. The others . they are all grown-ups. They don't
understand."

ASUBARU:
"And you are absolutely sure nobody saw you?"

RABI:
"Of course. If they had I'd be grounded. Wait, are you thinking I did it?!
But that's ridiculous! I'm just a child."

ASUBARU:
"No. Nobody thinks you did anything. And I won't tell anyone that you
climbed out of your window."

RABI:
"I want to go now. I don't want to talk to you any longer."

ASUBARU:
"Well, I guess it is alright for you to leave. Go and see if Miss Iria will
make you something to eat. And please tell her to send Mr. Gerumu inside.
He's the last person I need to talk to, I think."

Rabi quickly jumps to his feet and scrambles out of the room. The door closes with a bang.

Scene 14

Somebody knocks at the door.

ASUBARU:
"Come inside."

GERUMU:
"Iria told me you wanted to talk to me?"

ASUBARU:
"That's right. Please have a seat."

Gerumu sits down, eyes searching Asubaru's face.

GERUMU:
"What do you want to talk to me about? You already saw Iria - you know
that I was with her when Miss Hilda . died."

ASUBARU:
"Indeed, she told me that the two of you spent the morning together. But
where exactly were you at the time of the murder?"

GERUMU:
"We were outside, at the main gate. Iria was expecting some stuff from a
farmer and I kept her company."

ASUBARU:
"Yes, now I remember. She said something about a delivery. Mr. Gerumu, I
now have to ask you a rather . delicate question. You are quite taken with
Miss Iria, aren't you? And you know about her feelings for your employer.
Didn't it bother you that she is in love with an other man?"

GERUMU:
"Of course it bothers me. Who wouldn't be upset? But everybody knows
that he never returned her feelings. She will come around. There is no
reason why she shouldn't."

ASUBARU:
"Mmh. Very well. As your whereabouts are established I have only one
more question: did you see or hear anything unusual over the last few
days? Anything that might be related to the murder? As a chauffer you
are privy to quite a lot of things, I imagine."

GERUMU:
". no, nothing I can think of. Miss Hilda . she wasn't exactly everybody's
darling but that someone would hate her so. No, I really had no idea."

ASUBARU:
"Thank you, Mr. Gerumu, that is all. Could you please tell the others to
come to the great hall in an hour. I will go over the statements and if God
is with us there'll be an arrest then."

Gerumu nods and quietly leaves the room. His hurried footsteps can be heard down the hall.

Scene 15

Everybody is assembled in the great hall. Hilda's body is still lying where she fell, covered with a white sheet. Laures is sitting in an uncomfortable looking chair, staring dejectedly at his dead love. Tetei is standing behind his chair, watching Iria and Sherril fuss over him. Zadei is standing next to the clock, watching the scene from narrowed eyes, only now and then casting a disdainful look at the dead woman's body. Marion, Gerumu and Charon are standing together, talking in hushed voices. Rod is sitting on the stairs, obviously trying to put up a brave face for his brother who is sitting in his lap.

Finally a door opens and Asbaru enters, carrying an impressive pile of papers, the notes he took during the various interviews. He looks triumphant, although a look at the body on the ground quickly sobers him up.

ASUBARU:
"Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for your patience. Let me promise you
that I won't bother you for much longer. This was one of the most
complicated crimes I have ever had to face. There were no witnesses and
no immediate suspects. Truth to be told most of you had reasons to want
the deceased dead. Mr. Laures and Mr. Rod were jealous, her maid had
been stealing from her and even little Rabi-"

IRIA: "Excuse me, but are you going to tell us who did it or aren't you? I don't
think any of us want to be longer around . that thing . than absolutely
necessary."

ASUBARU:
"Don't interrupt me. Ahem, where was I? Ah. Anyway, despite the

numerous dislikes I have deducted that only one person had both, the
motive and the opportunity to commit this murder. The culprit is."

Asubaru pauses while everyone else holds their collective breaths.

ASUBARU:
"The author."

Beneath the ceiling of the room a black thunder cloud forms, electricity crackling malevolently around it. Maniacal laughter ensues, causing several of the faint of heart to squeak in terror. The mists part and reveal the shadowed, stunningly beautiful and, well let's admit it, slightly deranged form of a woman.

AYUMIE:
"Yes! It is true! I did it! I wrote everybody off into some distant corner
of the manor and then descended and clobbered her with the damned
pendulum! But I only did what everybody else wanted to do! Everybody
wants her dead! Even the people who love her want her dead! But of
course they don't really love her either! Muwahahahahahaha!!!!"

Everybody stares at the apparition, large sweat-drops appearing besides their heads - but of course the devious authoress could only have written them there. Zadei and everybody else with an unrequited crush are looking calculatingly at the apparition, obviously trying to think of a way to tackle her and usurp her not quite rightful power.

AYUMIE:
"Well, what are you gaping at? Don't even try it. I know what you're
thinking. I've put those thoughts there. Now if you would excuse me, I
have several other universes to visit - you know, mayhem and destruction
and all that. And then I'll write that Laures/Tetei/Zadei threesome I've
always been dreaming about. Now that Hilda is out of the way nothing is
going to stop me. Oh, and maybe I'll revive her and then kill her again. And
again. And again.."

Under much wacky laughter the cloud slowly disintegrates, leaving the stunned Seimaden characters to ponder their fate. Asubaru is frantically waving his handcuffs, trying to capture whiffs of smoke. Laures and Zadei look at each other, turning slightly green. Tetei seems suspiciously unperturbed.

THE END