Final Fantasy VII In a Backwards Universe

**I made this when I was bored in the Summer Holidays. Enjoy!**

Setting: The same world as FF7. It starts in a Field near the Gold Saucer.

Barret:(With an odd English accent, wearing a suit and a top hat) So, (takes a puff of his pipe) what can we do to help Shinra? Jolly good chaps they are!

Cloud:(Shrugs, wearing a pair of tattered jeans and a white top with curry stains all over it.) I dunno. You're the ex-PANSY, not me you prick.

Barret: Chip, Smalls, Quhhrz, donate all your money so they can make more cute little toys for the children!!!

Chip, Smalls, Quhhrz: YES SIR!

[Cut off to a toy factory in Niblehelm with a large sign saying: Shinra Toy co.]

Sephiroth: Okay, lets blow this joint!!! (Sephiroth looks around and sees 2 people running)

Sephiroth: HEY! Come back!!

Guy1: Nah! We're outta here!

Guy2: YEAH! I don't wanna see the disappointed look on all the lil kids faces!! Sephiroth: Think of the poor chocobos! NO FEATHERS COZ THEY'RE IN THEESE TOYS!!!

(Both the guys shrug and run off)

Sephiroth: . Okay. Looks like I'm by myself from here on.

(Sephiroth sets the bomb and runs out of the factory and dives onto the grass, covering his head)

Sephiroth: 3. 2. 1!

(There is a huge explosion and feathers and debree are thrown everywhere)

[Cut back to the field, Cloud, Barret, Chips, Smalls and Quhhrz are all standing in amazement, all looking at Nibelhelm]

Cloud: WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT??!!! IT SCARED THE SHIT OUTTA ME!!

Barret: NOOOOO!!!!! THE TOY FACTORY!!!

(They all scream except Cloud who has died of a heart attack. Barrets pipe falls out his mouth to the ground.)