Disclaimer: I don't own Moulin Rouge or any of the characters in this
story, except for an aforementioned one. (The driver) I'm still waiting to
meet Ewan McGregor.
A/N: This chapter was one of the hardest to write so far, hope everyone likes it. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, you guys are great!!!! The song in this chapter is Creed 'Hold Me Now' (I think)
I found shelter in my room. I sat down heavily in the old chair near the window, closed the curtains, and lit one of the several lamps in my small room. It created a dim environment, which I found quite comforting after the bright afternoon I had ventured out into earlier.
'After all, I am a creature of the night', and the sunlight seemed to be an old friend to me; I occasionally visited it and every so often it found me. But he had changed that. Christian had brought sunlight into my life. Just his name gave me warm feelings and comfort. That's why what I have to do is so hard.
I picked myself up and slowly walked over to my small desk, sitting down in the uncomfortable wooden chair. I opened up one of the right-hand drawers, and began sifting through all of the junk that had managed to accumulate in it. I found a pen and reached towards the other end of the desk and grabbed a piece of paper from the small pile. With that, I began my task. The pen scratched across the paper as I fought back tears. I finished it with a kiss, one final kiss to my poet.
The note was not nearly all I wanted to express to him, but it would do. I folded the note up and stuffed it into a narrow envelope. Finally, I scrawled the word 'Christian' on the front.
Sliding the envelope to the side of the desk, I picked up the bottle of pills I had procured earlier. The lid was unscrewed and the pills in my hand before I knew what had happened. I couldn't think now. I couldn't let myself take another option. There had only been two in the bottle; all that I was told was necessary to do the job required. I held them both in my hand and picked up a small glass of water.
This was it. No turning back. Not now. The man had said that the poison would take a varying amount of time to react with the host, depending on what consumed it. I could only hope that the poison would kick in before the show, or after. No one likes the lead dying in the middle of the performance. I moved the hand holding the pills closer to my mouth. Closer, closer; I could almost taste the bitterness on my tongue.
But I stopped dead in my tracks when I noticed something. Something that I had left there. Something I had sworn to read as soon as I had the chance.
I picked up the folded piece of paper in my pale fingers and stared at it. It was a note from Christian. He gave me one nearly every morning, even when we had been with each other the whole day before. His letters gave me hope, and made me feel wanted and loved. But I hadn't had a chance to read this one yet.
When Chocolat had brought me to him, and we vowed to leave, he had slipped this into the pocket of his jacket. He must have written it when I was in the gothic tower. I had hated to leave him there, with his own doubts, but he promised that he wouldn't get jealous. And I believed him. Slowly, carefully, I opened it.
To the one my heart belongs to,
It isn't often that I say something I can't do, but when I look into your eyes, and you mine, I can't but be completely and totally filled with love and joy, you are my everything. You have my heart, you have my mind, and I can't help but give you as much of myself as I can, because you stir something inside of me, something I've never known before you, and that something is real, true love. Only you can make me feel this way, and I thank you.
There are so many things about you that make me want to fall to my knees, the way you look at me, the way you kiss me and everything is right with the world, your funny faces, the way you're always quick to comfort those who need you. There are really so many things I could say if only I weren't running out of ink. Also remember that you are beautiful, the really, only truly beautiful woman in this world, whether you believe it or not. Every day I know you, is a day I love you more, you are my world.
Forever in adoration,
a poet in love
By now, tears were streaming down my cheek, falling on my numb body. The note had done something I had not let myself do. It made me question. Question my fate, question my decision. I was swimming in emotion, and the pure love I felt for him. For my poet. Could I turn back? Or was I too far gone. My thoughts and emotions burst from my lips into a song, as I wept for myself.
"I cried out 'Heaven save me!' but I'm down to one last breath, and with it let me say, let me say." Salty tears fell into my water glass.
"Hold me now, I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking, mabie six feet ain't so far down. Hold me now, I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking, mabie six feet ain't so far down."
I looked down at my hand, which contained my possible fate, the two pills. I closed my hand, tightened my grip on the water glass and accepted my choice.
"I'm so sorry Christian."
A/N: This chapter was one of the hardest to write so far, hope everyone likes it. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, you guys are great!!!! The song in this chapter is Creed 'Hold Me Now' (I think)
I found shelter in my room. I sat down heavily in the old chair near the window, closed the curtains, and lit one of the several lamps in my small room. It created a dim environment, which I found quite comforting after the bright afternoon I had ventured out into earlier.
'After all, I am a creature of the night', and the sunlight seemed to be an old friend to me; I occasionally visited it and every so often it found me. But he had changed that. Christian had brought sunlight into my life. Just his name gave me warm feelings and comfort. That's why what I have to do is so hard.
I picked myself up and slowly walked over to my small desk, sitting down in the uncomfortable wooden chair. I opened up one of the right-hand drawers, and began sifting through all of the junk that had managed to accumulate in it. I found a pen and reached towards the other end of the desk and grabbed a piece of paper from the small pile. With that, I began my task. The pen scratched across the paper as I fought back tears. I finished it with a kiss, one final kiss to my poet.
The note was not nearly all I wanted to express to him, but it would do. I folded the note up and stuffed it into a narrow envelope. Finally, I scrawled the word 'Christian' on the front.
Sliding the envelope to the side of the desk, I picked up the bottle of pills I had procured earlier. The lid was unscrewed and the pills in my hand before I knew what had happened. I couldn't think now. I couldn't let myself take another option. There had only been two in the bottle; all that I was told was necessary to do the job required. I held them both in my hand and picked up a small glass of water.
This was it. No turning back. Not now. The man had said that the poison would take a varying amount of time to react with the host, depending on what consumed it. I could only hope that the poison would kick in before the show, or after. No one likes the lead dying in the middle of the performance. I moved the hand holding the pills closer to my mouth. Closer, closer; I could almost taste the bitterness on my tongue.
But I stopped dead in my tracks when I noticed something. Something that I had left there. Something I had sworn to read as soon as I had the chance.
I picked up the folded piece of paper in my pale fingers and stared at it. It was a note from Christian. He gave me one nearly every morning, even when we had been with each other the whole day before. His letters gave me hope, and made me feel wanted and loved. But I hadn't had a chance to read this one yet.
When Chocolat had brought me to him, and we vowed to leave, he had slipped this into the pocket of his jacket. He must have written it when I was in the gothic tower. I had hated to leave him there, with his own doubts, but he promised that he wouldn't get jealous. And I believed him. Slowly, carefully, I opened it.
To the one my heart belongs to,
It isn't often that I say something I can't do, but when I look into your eyes, and you mine, I can't but be completely and totally filled with love and joy, you are my everything. You have my heart, you have my mind, and I can't help but give you as much of myself as I can, because you stir something inside of me, something I've never known before you, and that something is real, true love. Only you can make me feel this way, and I thank you.
There are so many things about you that make me want to fall to my knees, the way you look at me, the way you kiss me and everything is right with the world, your funny faces, the way you're always quick to comfort those who need you. There are really so many things I could say if only I weren't running out of ink. Also remember that you are beautiful, the really, only truly beautiful woman in this world, whether you believe it or not. Every day I know you, is a day I love you more, you are my world.
Forever in adoration,
a poet in love
By now, tears were streaming down my cheek, falling on my numb body. The note had done something I had not let myself do. It made me question. Question my fate, question my decision. I was swimming in emotion, and the pure love I felt for him. For my poet. Could I turn back? Or was I too far gone. My thoughts and emotions burst from my lips into a song, as I wept for myself.
"I cried out 'Heaven save me!' but I'm down to one last breath, and with it let me say, let me say." Salty tears fell into my water glass.
"Hold me now, I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking, mabie six feet ain't so far down. Hold me now, I'm six feet from the edge and I'm thinking, mabie six feet ain't so far down."
I looked down at my hand, which contained my possible fate, the two pills. I closed my hand, tightened my grip on the water glass and accepted my choice.
"I'm so sorry Christian."
