TEKKEN COMMITTEE PRESENTS:
THE SEARCH FOR THE NEW TEKKEN MINI-GAME

By Saiyan Rage, the certified Kazuya stalker

It all started with a reminder:

"Hey, Namco wants us to come up with a new mini-game."

Lee glanced at his brother. "Why can't they do it themselves?"

Kazuya shrugged his shoulders. "Hell should I know. They just want us to come up with something."

Lee lit a cigarette. "Whatever then.."

"Right. Call the Committee."

Narrator: So Kazuya once again called the committee for another life-changing meeting.

Kazuya looked at the narrator funny. "Why would it be 'life-changing'?"

Narrator: *shrugs shoulders* It sounded dramatic.

"Whatever."

"Who are you talking to?" asked Lee.

"Nobody, Lee! God, leave me alone."

Lee's lower lip trembled. "But...but..."

"I've called you all here because it has come to my attention that we need a new mini-game. I am leaving it up to you all to come up with something by tomorrow," explained Kazuya as he ignored Lee.

"Why so soon?" asked Jin.

"Because I have better things to do, honestly."

Jin shrugged his shoulders. "Whatever."

Kazuya was about to throw a podium at Jin, when Jun gave him her evil glare. He put it down immediately. "Anyway, we will meet in 24-hours, and I will determine if your idea is good enough. Hell, you all don't have to do it, but as long as you try, that's what counts. But I suggest you come up with something, damn it!!"

"Wait, how come you aren't going to do this too?" demanded Julia.

"How many of you want me to make the mini-game that will most likely involve my inflicting pain on you?" asked Kazuya. No hands were raised. He turned to Julia. "See?"

"I do now..." Julia thought about it for another minute. "Hey! Does Kat-zumi have to do this too?"

Kazuya laughed. "Don't be stupid! Kat-zumi is a cat; not to mention the cute, cuddly, fuzzy mascot. She probably couldn't do much."

Kat-zumi growled at Kazuya and bared her claws.

"Fine, FINE, you want to come up with a game, you go on ahead then," replied Kazuya as he rolled his eyes.

The cat purred.

"Anyway, enough chit-chat. Get to it! NOW!!" The committee left the room in a hurry before they could be hit by thrown objects.

"Wow, not only was that short, but Kazuya didn't throw anything at anyone!" observed Julia.

"Don't worry, he will before the episode ends," replied Yoshimitsu.

" 'Episode'? What are you talking about?"

Yoshimitsu started to panic. "Well, what I mean, is...uh..." He quickly spun around and disappeared in a puff of smoke.

Julia scratched her head. "Okay…this Committee is just too weird..."

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TWENTY-FOUR HOURS LATER

"I hope you all did the assignment...because I am not in a good mood today!" exclaimed Kazuya.

"Really...I didn't even know he HAD a good mood," muttered Bryan.

"I TOLD YOU I WASN'T IN A GOOD MOOD TODAY!!!" shouted Kazuya as he upper-cut Bryan in the face. After regaining his composure, he continued: "Who wants to present their idea first?"

The room was silent.

King raised a hand.

"Alright, what do you have?"

King placed two six-packs on the table.

Kazuya's face fell in his hand for a moment, then brushed his hair with the same hand. "Oh God, I think I know where this is going..."

"My mini-game is based around chugging. Let me demonstrate...Lei, come here."

Lei walked up to King.

"I will show you how to play. I open this can of beer, or many, if I can drink that much, and Lei opens his can of beer. Then we chug." King immediately chugged the six-pack of beer. "Whoever passes put first lose—" He immediately passed out. Kazuya drummed his fingers on his desk.

"Damn, do you chug that much beer on a regular basis?" asked Lei.

"I think I'm blind," whimpered King.

Kazuya shook his head and sighed. "Lei, hand me the rest of the six-pack King gave you. It will give me something to throw. Next!"

Ling decided to volunteer.

"And what do you have in mind?" asked Kazuya.

"Like, we could do a totally cool little beat-'em-up mini-game, you know? We could beat up Heihachi's little reject army, and like....why are you all looking at me like that?"

"I think there was something like that in Tekken 3...what was it now? Oh yes, TEKKEN FORCE!" exclaimed Jin.

Kazuya smiled. "Lee, take a note: 'Jin may show some promise after all'." Kazuya pressed a little red button, and a large metal pan fell on Ling's head.

"Like, why did you hit me on the head like that? You're mean," said Ling.

"Anybody else have an idea that they actually spent some time on?" demanded Kazuya as he ignored Ling.

It was Hwoarang's turn to share.

"As long as it doesn't involve drugs, I don't care what it is," said Kazuya.

"Alright, so I was having another one of my trips you know, in which I was this snowboard! Dude, it was pretty cool! Anyway, my idea is that we should have a snowboarding mini-game! That would kick ass, dude!"

Kazuya placed a finger on his chin. "I like that. Let's test it out."

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AT SOME MOUNTAIN

"Okay, so what is the object of this mini-game?" asked Kazuya.

"Well, you have to execute all these awesome tricks to get points. You like, lose points for falling off, and messing up. Oh yeah, and your opponent can try to knock you off too."

"Does anybody else see a red flag shooting up?" asked Nina.

"What happens if you lose?" asked Yoshimitsu.

Hwoarang shrugged his shoulders. "Winner gets to wail on the loser with the loser's snowboard."

"Hell yeah!! I can do this then!" exclaimed Kazuya as he mounted on his snowboard. "Alright, who wants to challenge me?"

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BACK AT THE COMMITTEE MEETING PLACE

"I'd just like to say you all suck," declared Kazuya. "What's so bad about competing against me in Tekken Snowboarding?!"

"You hit too hard," answered Lei.

Kazuya sighed. "You're a wuss, Lei. Hwoarang—"

"Dude, that's not my name!" exclaimed Hwoarang.

The Committee stared at Hwoarang.

"Uh, yes it is," replied Kazuya.

"Are you sure?" asked Hwoarang.

"Uh, yes."

Hwoarang stared at Kazuya. "Dude, wait you said...oh...oh yeah! You're right, that's my name, sorry man, it's just that I hear stuff."

"Wonder why," muttered Kazuya. "Anyway, Hwoarang would have been able to participate if not for the fact that he kept going on about the how snow was talking to him...so far his is the best idea."

"I got an idea, wanna hear?" asked Ganryu.

"Actually, no," answered Kazuya.

"Aw, it's a good one, I promise! Anyway, the game is like a dating simulation. As the guy, you have to choose between Michelle, Julia, Nina, Anna, or Jun. You have to please your woman enough so that she will devote herself to you."

The ladies responded by smacking Ganryu upside his head, except for Nina, whose high-heeled shoe hit Ganryu on the head.

"Ganryu, you need a life. Lee, take note of that. Does anybody else have an idea for a good mini-game? Otherwise, it's the snowboard mini-game for all of you guys."

Yoshimitsu raised his left hand.

"Alright, I see you Yoshi, now stop spinning that damn hand; you're making Hwoarang trip out," said Kazuya. Yoshimitsu stopped spinning his hand, and Hwoarang groaned, and looked at the sword instead.

"Dude, it glows," he said.

"My idea is Tekken Monopoly!" Yoshimitsu announced proudly.

Kazuya raised an eyebrow. "That's...it?"

"Nonononono! I've got a board and pieces and money and everything!" he exclaimed. He disappeared for a minute, and then another minute later, he reappeared with the game itself.

"Okay, so you play it like regular Monopoly, except the places are based on the ones in Tekken, and playing pieces are based on some of the characters, which I carved myself," explained Yoshimitsu.

"Hey, is that me?" asked Nina as she picked up a piece. "How cute! And to think you got all of my features on a rather small piece, too."

"Hey, I can see a Paul piece all the way from the back of the room," said King.

Paul examined the playing piece that resembled him. "My God! My hair isn't THAT high...is it?" He looked at the rest of the Committee. They all looked around in every which direction other than Paul's, and whistled.

"Come on! I have the right to know!" he shouted. He was smacked by the remaining six-pack of beer.

"And there goes the rest of the six-pack," said Kazuya.

"Aha! See, I knew it! I knew Kazuya would throw something!" exclaimed Yoshimitsu.

"How?" asked Nina.

"You have ESP or something?" asked Jin.

Yoshimitsu suddenly realized that he let something slip. Kazuya knew what was going on.

"Oh, look how nice my piece is!" exclaimed Kazuya in an attempt to change the subject. The Committee stared at him.

"Why are you all staring at me?" asked Kazuya.

King snickered.

Lee smoked his cigarette while shifting his eyes left and right.

"That sounded kind of...dirty," answered Anna.

"How so? I was just commenting on my playing piece."

All the ladies, except Ling, giggled.

"I don't get it," said Ling. Julia whispered the explanation to Ling, and then Ling giggled.

"You're all so weird," said Lee.

"What is so damn funny—oh, I get it. I see what's so funny. First of all, I said 'piece'; and I meant the playing piece of me in that Tekken Monopoly game, not the one you're all thinking about."

"There goes all my pure thoughts," said a blushing Jun. Kazuya started to blush.

"Oh, GOD!" shouted Jin. "I'm disturbed for life now."

Kazuya stopped blushing. "You're all really horny people, you know that? Lee, memo: The whole Committee is as horny as I am, maybe more so."

Lee grudgingly took the memo.

"Anyway, Yoshimitsu, you did a really good job on this piece—you even got my spiky hair down too," Kazuya said to again change the subject. When he touched one of the small spikes, it pricked his finger and blood began to spurt out. "Okay, they're really sharp, and I'm losing an unusual amount of blood," he said with an unusual calmness to his tone of voice as he tossed the piece aside so he could suck the blood from his wound.

"The boot's in there too," added Yoshimitsu.

"Okay, why is the boot in there?" asked Bryan.

"People like the boot," answered Yoshimitsu as he shrugged his shoulders. "Anyway, the currency is also based on Yen, since it was easier for me. Oh yeah, and I have dice too—they glow in the dark! Neat, huh?"

"It glows," said Hwoarang.

"Yoshi, you just have too much time on your hands sometimes," replied Kauzya. "Besides, it would be too much trouble, what with the royalties, and the fact that it's going to be programmed, so it wouldn't be as fun."

Yoshimitsu groaned, and hung his head.

"But," continued Kazuya as he pulled out his checkbook, "For half a million Yen I'll buy your product, and I'll throw in an extra hundred thousand if you can keep quiet about it."

"Deal!" exclaimed Yoshimitsu as he shook Kazuya's hand and took the check. Kazuya put the board game into his trench coat.

"Alright, so any other ideas?" asked Kazuya.

"How about Tennis?" suggested Julia.

"Okay," said Kazuya. "Just give me five...minutes...I think I lost...so much...blood..." Kazuya started to stagger.

Julia sighed and rolled her eyes(which is a typical teenager thing, of course).

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THE TENNIS COURT

"Alright, so it's like any other tennis game, huh?" asked Kazuya.

Julia nodded. "I'll demonstrate...who wants to be my partner?"

Ganryu's hand immediately shot up.

The committee watched Julia beat Ganryu down at tennis. However, Ganryu didn't mind, especially whenever Julia(who wore a very short tennis skirt) bent down to tie her shoes, exposing her panties to the Committee.

"Whoa, baby," said Jin. Michelle smacked him upside his head.

"Don't look at my daughter that way!" warned Michelle.

"Yes ma'am," muttered Jin.

"Okay, that's more than enough of Julia I needed to see," said Nina.

"So basically, it's Tekken Tennis with Julia as Anna Kornicova," concluded Kazuya. "I'll pass."

"You fool!" shouted Ganryu. Moments later, he was suddenly smacked in the head by pair of tennis shoes.

"You want to repeat that, Ganny-boy?"

"Uh, not really," answered Ganryu as he rubbed his aching head.

"Good. Alright, back to the Committee room," said Kazuya.

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BACK AT THE COMMITTEE

"Okay, so that sucked. Anyone else have an idea that will save this meeting (and this fic for that matter?)?" asked Kazuya.

"You bet I do," answered Nina.

"Well, what is it then?" asked Kazuya.

Nina smiled as she pulled out a shotgun.

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AT THE SHOOTING RANGE

"There are people out there that may get frustrated playing against a certain char, and they'll get mad, and say 'oh, that Paul is just a cheap-ass, I just want to shoot him!' or something of the like," explained Nina.

"Hey, why was I used as an example?" asked Paul.

Nina shrugged her shoulders. "People hate you."

Paul gnashed his teeth. "That's not true!"

"Uh, actually it is," replied Bryan. He held up a printout that showed a poll asked on a very popular Tekken message board. Paul snatched the results, and looked at it.

"Well I'll be damned," he said. He sniffled. "I'm kinda...hurt."

"Anyway," continued Nina, "Certain characters would use a certain weapon, for example: I would use a rifle, since I have experience with those. Kazuya looks like someone that could use something that means business, like a shotgun."

"Single or double-barrel?" he asked.

"I'm thinking single. Lei would definitely be a handgun user, since he's experienced with those. Bryan I can see with an Uzi."

"Hell yeah!" he exclaimed.

"I don't think this would be a very good game...I don't want to see a rendered version of myself with a gun," said Jun.

Nina froze. "Aw, shit."

Kazuya nodded. "It sounds fun, and besides, any excuse to shoot Paul is a damn good one, but there is NO WAY this game could make the final cut."

Nina sighed. "Senate hearings?"

Kazuya nodded as he rolled his eyes and sighed. "Yeah...especially that one country that's always wasting time trying to find a way to stop video game violence. Oh well, we can always dream."

Nina sighed again. "This is true." She sighed, and then saw Anna laughing at her. "Like you can come up with anything!"

Anna brushed a hand through her hair. "Of COURSE I can."

"Oh lord, more sibling rivalry," muttered Lee.

Kazuya nodded. "I know. That's just so stupid."

"You're telling me. By the way, we going to play Jenga later?"

"Yeah. I'm going to own you, Lee."

"Yeah right! I'm so much better at that game than you!"

"You are not, you fruity nicotine-sucking, Honda-worshipping, silver-haired freak of the week!"

"Oooooh," said King, Yoshimitsu, Bryan, Paul, Law, Julia, and Lei.

Lee gasped out of being offended. "Take that back you spiky-haired, purple-suit-worshipping, in severe-need-of-a-valium-shot psycho!"

"OOOOOOH," said the entire Committee (except for Jun.).

"Damn!" exclaimed Jin.

"Fight! Fight! Fight!" chanted King.

Kazuya was in severe shock; he was speechless. So Kazuya decided to respond in the only way he could:

He rushed at Lee, and Ultimate Tackled him.

"Take that back, you bastard!" he shouted as he punched Lee.

"You first!" he spat back.

The Committee just stared as the two threw punches and kicks at one another. Lei yawned, while Kat-zumi stared at the clock.

Lei decided to take an opportunity.

"So Jun, what say you and I go out for coffee?" he offered as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder. Jun was about to answer, when Kat-zumi jumped up, and scratched Lei's face repeatedly while hissing and spitting.

"OWW! Damn...what did the cat do that for?!" cried Lei.

Jun stroked the cat. "Kat-zumi says to never hit on me again, unless you want her and Kazuya to double-team your ass."

Kat-zumi purred in agreement. Moments later, Kazuya ran up to Kat-zumi and gave her some dried fish.

"Good, Kat-zumi...you learned that so well!" he praised. He turned around. "Alright, ROUND 2, LEE!"

The two brothers went at it again with the punching, kicking, and name-calling.

"Dude, I got the munchies," Hwoarang said out of the blue.

"Anyone want to order some pizza?" suggested Michelle.

"Yeah, I'll chip in," said King as he pulled out his wallet.

"Me too," agreed Yoshimitsu as he pulled some cash out from out of nowhere.

"Whatever," said Jin as he handed his share of money to Michelle.

"Make sure you get one with spinach," said Nina.

"Yeah, I'll pay for three!" exclaimed Paul. "Give her some cash, Law."

Law glared at Paul as he pulled out a wad of cash. "Man, when are you supposed to get that job again?"

Paul rolled his eyes. "I told you, when the company's not on strike anymore. In the meantime, just keep that tab running."

"If I keep it running, it's gonna run out of places to run to," muttered Law as he wrote the numbers down.

"You better save some for us!" shouted Lee as he kicked Kazuya in the side.

"Yeah, we're going to be really hungry after this fight!" exclaimed Kazuya as he punched Lee in the gut.

The rest of the Committee just sighed.

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THREE HOURS LATER, BACK AT THE COMMITTEE
"Okay, so there was a slight delay, for which we apologize for," apologized Kazuya (who was perfectly fine for someone who had been fighting.).

Lee (who had a cast on his arm and bandages on his face) rolled his eyes. "How the hell are you okay? I hit you a lot!"

Kazuya looked at Lee smugly and answered, "I can't help if my face is too perfect to be damaged."

Paul scoffed. "Yeah right. More like too flawed to be damaged—"

Kazuya immediately tied Paul up, and hung him out the window.

"Anyway, where were we? Oh yes, anyone else have any mini-game ideas to share?"

Lei volunteered.

"My idea is Tekken Scrabble. You get points for making Tekken-related words. Who wants to test it out with me?"

Julia and King raised their hands; Kazuya joined in because he was the head of the Committee and whatever he said, goes (or something like that).

"Alright, I'm assuming you all know how to play, so just get your letters, and let's play," said Lei.

Kazuya went first (for obvious reasons). His word was "Devil". The rest of the Committee tried not to make any jokes about this. Julia's turn came, and she came up with "Nina." King managed to spell out "Armor King" (How he got that from eight letters, I don't know), and then Lei put in "Jun", but then Kazuya spelled out an obscene word directed towards Lei(after drawing more letters, of course), then threw the board and the pieces at the poor supercop.

"Well, that mini-game would have meant more royalties anyway, and people would find a way to spell those obscenities, as I demonstrated," Kazuya said. "Anyone else have an idea?"

Anna raised her hand.

"Alright...what's your idea?"

Anna smiled, turned the lights off, closed the curtains, and turned on an overhead projector. "My idea is for Tekken KiSS sets."

Kazuya raised an eyebrow. "Say what?"

Anna rolled her eyes. "They're like electronic paper dolls. You can dress up the guys any way you please—of course, there's only four guys I put in there, since they're the most popular."

Kazuya whistled. "I can only guess who they are…"

Anna put a sheet on the projector, and it showed Lee, Jin, Hwoarang, and Kazuya.

"Oh God," Kazuya said.

"Oh God," Jin said.

"Oh man," said Lee.

"Huh?" said Hwoarang.

Anna smiled. "See, I feel that the Tekken market needs more female gamers. I think KiSS sets of the four of you would help to sell the Tekken franchise even more. Oh, and don't worry, you can only be stripped down to as much as your underwear."

"Probably because it wouldn't be approved if it went any further than that," muttered Nina.

Anna ignored her older sister. "So, what do you think?"

"Whatever," said Jin.

"I'm alright with it," shrugged Lee.

"Dude, what was I thinking about again?" asked Hwoarang.

"Hell no," said Kazuya.

"Why not?" asked Anna.

"You think I want to see a bunch of psycho fan girls strip me down on a regular basis? My poor Jun would have to deal with the constant phone calls and e-mails; it's just not worth it. Besides, if the girls want to see me stripped down so badly, they can get a pencil and paper, and draw it. Next!"

Nina laughed at Anna as she stomped to her seat.

"Hey, how come I wasn't in the KiSS set?" asked Paul(who must be some kind of Houdini to be able to get out of the predicament he was in just minutes ago).

"People just don't like you, Paul!" she answered.

Paul sniffled, and his lower lip trembled.

Law decided to present his idea.

"That's pretty damn shocking; you're never really saying or doing much in this Committee," commented Kazuya.

Law shrugged his shoulders. "I figured I may as well go with it, seeing how I'll never get out of this Committee."

"Damn straight! So your idea is…?"

"Well, I was thinking somewhere along the lines of Tekken Ping-Pong."

Law pulled out a ping-pong table. "Who wants to play me?"

"RIGHT HERE!" volunteered King. King immediately jumped to the opposite side. "We just play it like regular ping-pong, right?"

"Yep. Of course, some characters will hit harder than others," explained Law. He picked up the ping-pong ball, and hit it with the paddle. King hit it, but it hit Law in the head and knocked him out.

"Oh, now I see how different strengths can make the difference," said King. "Uh, Law?"

"Damn, that ping-pong ball was pretty light," said Lei. "How'd you manage to knock Law out like that?"

King shrugged his shoulders. "I guess I just don't know my own strength."

"That, or Law just has a really weak head," added Bryan.

Kazuya rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"Meow."

"Hey, what's your idea, Kat-zumi?"

"Meow...mreow...yowl...meow, meow," answered Kat-zumi. The Committee turned to Jun.

"Kat-zumi is suggesting a 'virtual pet' kind of mini-game, except rather than take care of a pet, you take care of a Tekken character," answered Jun.

"Meow, meow, yowl, mreow, *purr*."

"She says that you would have to take care of that character by feeding and training it, making sure it gets plenty of rest before any fights, and of course, fight against your friends. She says it will be an online sort of thing."

"What happens if the character gets neglected?" asked Julia.

"Meow...mreow, mreow, meow, *hisss*!"

"If the character is neglected," translated Jun, "They end up disowning you, and throw you off a cliff."

Kazuya screamed. "Painful memories, painful memories..." he curled up in his chair shaking violently.

"Meow."

"She says she's just kidding," said Jun. Kazuya immediately calmed down, and slicked any loose strands of his hair back.

Kazuya took a deep breath. "Hrm...I'm not really considering use for it as a mini-game..."

Kat-zumi hissed, arched her back, and approached Kazuya.

"...BUT I think we can make a whole new game out of your game, Kat-zumi!" Kazuya quickly added.

Kat-zumi purred.

"Alright," said Kazuya, "If we don't have a mini-game soon, I'm just gonna go home and go to bed."

Silence.

"Okay, you're all fresh out of ideas?" he asked.

"It would appear so...you rejected just about everyone's ideas, except for Hwoarang's, but we don't wanna do that one; and you decided that Kat-zumi's should be a game on its own," answered Michelle.

Kazuya leaned back in his chair. "Well then...I guess I will just tell Namco we don't have a mini—"

It was at that moment that a ball hit Kazuya in his forehead, knocking the Committee leader down.

"Oh my God! Someone hit Kazuya with a dodgeball!" exclaimed Lee.

The Committee crowded around Kazuya, who was lying unconscious on the floor.

"Damn, I may insult and contradict the guy, but I would never throw a dodgeball at him," said Paul.

"Kazuya! Kazuya! Speak to me!" cried Jun as she lightly slapped his hand.

"Okay think I am I," Kazuya replied groggily.

"Uh...did he just...?" asked Lee.

"Uh, I think he's getting his sentences mixed up," answered Bryan.

"That's it, this Committee is just getting too weird for me," said Julia.

"Are hell you the about talking?"

"Damn, how hard was the ball thrown?" asked King.

"Threw hell more who the importantly in that?" asked Kazuya.

"What did you say? I don't understand," said Jun.

Kazuya rolled his eyes.

"Dude, he's wants to know who in the hell threw that dodge ball," Hwoarang answered.

The Committee looked at him.

"Dude, it's not that hard to figure out!" exclaimed Hwoarang.

"High are unless you," muttered Kazuya.

"Dude!" exclaimed Hwoarang "I'm trying to help you out here!".

"Only Mishima knew was a if that I you," Kazuya said to himself.

"How do we fix this?" asked Lee.

"Dodgeball me the again hit with," answered Kazuya.

"Hit him again with the dodge ball," translated Hwoarang.

"I can do it!" volunteered Paul.

"No hell!" exclaimed Kazuya. He threw a golf club at Paul, knocking him out, then said "It Jin do can."

"Dad, I don't know what you said, but I just know you want me to hit you with the dodge ball. I'm not going to hit you in the head with a dodgeball."

"Are you yes."

"No I'm not."

"Ass your me make don't kick."

"Jin, please do what your father asks. I know these circumstances are strange, but he would really appreciate it."

"Normal just talk wanna again I!" exclaimed Kazuya.

Jin rolled his eyes. "Alright, fine." He picked up the dodge ball, and bounced it.

"Bouncing damn throw stop it and that!" shouted Kazuya.

Jin gave Kazuya a puzzled look.

"Dude, he says 'Damn it, stop bouncing that and throw!'"

Jin gnashed his teeth and threw the ball, and it smacked into Kazuya's head, knocking him out once more.

"Oh my God! Someone hit Kazuya with a dodgeball....again!" shouted Lee.

"Kazuya, Kazuya, are you okay?" pleaded Jun.

"Yeah, I'm fine now...and I'm making sense!" answered Kazuya.

"Just why the hell did you talk like that anyway?" asked Nina.

Kazuya rubbed the back of his head.

"I guess I should have told you all sooner. See, when I was dropped off that cliff, I hit my head pretty hard. After I got out of that coma, all my sentences were literally mixed up, so my dad knocked me out again, and I was fine. Stupid father, this is all HIS fault—"

"You never saw a doctor about this?" asked Michelle.

Kazuya shrugged his shoulders. "I didn't think I would get hit in the head that much."

"But what happens when you do that Stone Head throw?" asked Jun.

"Well, that just causes a speech impediment that I'd rather not admit about right now," Kazuya answered sheepishly.

Jun and the rest of the Committee shrugged their shoulders.

"Glad we spent a lot of time on that," Bryan said sarcastically.

"Anyway, let's just forget that incident for now, and get back to the subject: who the hell threw that dodge ball?" asked Kazuya.

The Committee was quiet.

Kazuya slammed his fists on the table. "You mean NOBODY saw it coming?"

The Committee shook their heads.

Kazuya twirled the dodge ball on his index finger. "Oh well...I guess that person won't be credited for creating the new Tekken mini-game: Tekken Dodge Ball."

"Hey, shouldn't we vote on Tekken Dodge Ball before we decide to put it in the game?" asked Julia.

"We didn't vote on the others," replied Kazuya.

"Well, I just want a vote, okay?"

"Alright, fine, we'll take a vote. Those in favor of Tekken Dodge Ball say 'aye'."

"AYE!" shouted the Committee.

"Alright, then it's unanimous. Tekken Dodge Ball it is. Wait a second, why did you all agree on this one?"

"Hitting you with that dodge ball actually felt kind of good," answered Jin. He was suddenly hit in the head with a dodge ball, knocking him out of his chair.

"Jin!" cried Julia.

"Kazuya!" scolded Jun.

Kazuya shrugged his shoulders. "What, I can't discipline my son? Alright, anyone else have a good reason for this to be the new mini-game?"

"Well, it's like mine, but there's no guns; so it's okay to have Tekken Dodge Ball," answered Nina.

"I'm good at dodging!" exclaimed Yoshimitsu.

Kazuya sighed, then shrugged his shoulders. "Oh, what the hell, you all liked it, so why should I complain...alright then, I'll send it to Namco tomorrow."

The Committee cheered.

"Now then, who's up for Tekken Monopoly?" asked Kazuya as he pulled the game out from his trench coat. "I'm the boot!"

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Narrator: So the Tekken Committee eventually agreed on a mini-game...

"I still don't know who threw that ball," said Kazuya.

Narrator: What I don't get is that whole scene where you're talking strangely.

"I already explained how I got that way, and it was fixed...although I have a headache now, and I think I'm starting to hallucinate."

Narrator: Maybe you should get some rest.

"No, I'm okay, I can take this kind of punishment—" Kazuya immediately fell to the floor.

Narrator: *sigh*

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AND NOW, A WORD FROM KAZUYA MISHIMA

"Okay, this was a little more absurd than the previous story...namely that part where I mixed up the words in my sentences and the circumstances that must occur in order for it to happen. Just so you know, I don't talk like that if you hit me with a dodge ball—in fact, hitting me with a dodge ball will only make me mad—unless I'm playing it, of course. And just who threw that ball anyway? Oh, chugging as much beer as King did would definitely KILL YOU in real life. Thank goodness it's only a fanfiction.

"What was really silly was the part where the Committee made a double entendre out of the sentence 'look how nice my piece is'. I really can't say anything about this part though, because I may just get a little too...well, you know.

"However, I thought the part where Lee and I were fighting was pretty funny. A nice twist on the 'sibling rivalry' previously seen through Nina and Anna.

"Anyway, this was an absurd story...which is good. Part 5 wasn't really absurd, and that scared me! But seriously....well, enough from me. Until Next Time."

NEXT EPISODE: Meet the Unknown that is...uh...Unknown! What is she here for? Who is she, really? What does she want? Why does Kazuya say "Twah"? All this and some absurd stuff in the next TEKKEN COMMITTEE: UNKNOWN MAKES HERSELF KNOWN! Wait, that's a contradicting title....Oh no, I can't change it because it's made official! CRAP!!!!

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