Disclaimer: It's all Joss's. If it was mine, Riley would have died a slow
and painful death by now. Something involving red-hot pokers. Or a pit full
of hungry lions. Or just telling Glory he's the key and watching her work.
Anyway, he's still alive and far too well, so it's not mine.
A/N: Thanks everyone for the reviews! And also thanks for all the suggestions for websites and fanfics for them to see. I realised when I was writing this that there was far too much good fanfic for them to see to put in one chapter, so I'm gonna have some more later. Just for the purposes of this story, I've put all the stories on one made up fanfic site. All the fics I've mentioned are REALLY GOOD and I've put links to them at the bottom. **********
Buffy hung up the phone, and wandered absent-mindedly back into the living room.
"So, what did she want?"
Buffy jumped.
"I thought I told you to leave, Spike."
"Yeah, well, I didn't. What did she want?"
Buffy sighed, and flopped down next to him. "She said she found a spell that could help us find the whereabouts of this Mohra demon. She's gonna be late home, cos she wants to research it a bit more, maybe get some of the ingredients."
"So, we're gonna be all alone, are we?" He raised his eyebrows suggestively at her.
"Yeah, except for Dawn," Buffy said, hoping he wasn't about to suggest what she thought he was. "Why?"
"Well, I just thought we could surf the net for a bit."
Buffy stared at him, amazed. Was he actually suggesting they did something that didn't involve fighting or nakedness. Or both.
"Yeah, all right."
*******
Buffy stared at the search engine in front of her.
"So," she said, "which one shall we look at?"
Spike scanned the list, and then pointed at a link near the bottom.
"This one sounds good. Buffyfics.net."
Buffy clicked it, and watched the site load. ""BuffyFics: The ONLY place for all your fanfiction needs." What's that all about?"
Spike scrolled down the page, and then said, "Well, first we gotta pick a category, luv. Shall we have them listed by author, publish date or character?"
"Character," Buffy said decidedly. "I'm not sure what's going to be there, but there's no harm in looking, right?"
She clicked the link, and was taken to another list of choices. "Okay, which character do we want them centred around. Buffy, Willow, Xander, Giles, Angel, Spike. . ."
"Well, obviously we're gonna have 'em about me, luv." He pulled the mouse away from her, and chose "Spike Fics."
When the page loaded, they were faced by yet more choices. Buffy stared at them confusedly. "S/A, Spawn, Spuffy, S/X? Where are we supposed to start?"
"Well, how about at the beginning? Try S/A, whatever that is."
"Okay." Buffy clicked S/A, then quickly chose a story, ignoring the NC-17 warning.
Spike read the story half-heartedly, wondering why he was doing this. It had been fun visiting sites that made fun of Buffy, but reading stories was something different altogether. Then he noticed that the story was about all about him, Angel, Drusilla and Darla. It was set before he came to Sunnydale, and before Angel got a soul.
He was starting to get interested, when Buffy, who was a much faster reader than he was, suddenly burst out laughing.
"What's so funny?"
Buffy tried to speak, but was laughing so hard it was impossible, so she settled for simply pointing at a line near the bottom of the screen.
Spike found the part she had pointed to, and started to read. A few seconds later, however, he stood up so suddenly his chair flew backwards into the wall.
"HOW DID THEY KNOW ABOUT THAT?!"
"What?!"
Buffy was sure that if Spike could have blushed, he would have resembled a tomato. "I mean. . . what are they on? Me and the poof?! That's crazy!"
"Yu-huh."
Spike sheepishly went to retrieve his chair, and once he'd brought it back, said quietly, "You know those flashbacks they had in that episode we watched earlier?"
"Yeah."
"You don't suppose they have any others in any episodes, do they? Not that I have anything to hide, or anything, but. . ."
"Well, we'll see when we watch, won't we." Buffy let out a huge grin. "And if there are, all the more fun for me!"
Buffy clicked back to the list of Spike fics, then looked at the next one. "Spawn?" she said slowly. "Wonder what that's about."
She clicked the link, and then chose another story called "The Key to My Heart." She read it carefully, unsure of what she might find, then, about halfway down, let out a cry of disgust.
"What is it, pet?"
"This is just sick! These people must have no lives to write about this. I mean, how twisted would they have to be to so much as think this?!"
Spike read the passage out loud.
""Oh, Spike, I haven't been entirely honest with you. The thing is, Spike, I love you."
"Bit? I haven't been entirely honest with you either. It's not the Slayer I love. It's you."
Spike then stepped forward and captured Dawn's mouth in a kiss. It was sweet at first, but quickly got more passionate as Spike began to explore Dawn's throat with his tongue. Dawn clung to him as. . ."
"Okay, that's enough, Spike. It's gross enough without you reading it out for the world to hear."
Spike grinned at her, and read a little further down. "Ooh, Slayer, I wouldn't read the rest of this if I were you."
"Why not?"
"Let's just say the fic is rated "R" for a reason."
"Oh my god!" Buffy said, as she read the rest of the page. "My sister is pure and innocent! She doesn't even know about this stuff!"
Spike raised an eyebrow at her.
"Okay, maybe that's pushing it a little, but people still don't have to write about it. She's 15!"
"Okay, I'm thinking we'd better get off this page before you kill someone. We'll look at something else instead."
They went back to the main page, and chose Spuffy fics. After scanning the list, Spike chose a story called "Kisses."
Buffy read the story description this time, deciding she was sick of reading stuff she *really* didn't want to. "What if Spike hadn't been dreaming in Out of My Mind when he kissed Buffy?" Buffy looked at Spike. "What's it talking about? What's "Out of My Mind?""
"Guess it's an episode."
Buffy thought hard and vaguely recalled that title being on one of the boxes of videos. "I think it was the one we missed the end of. You know, when you attacked me."
"It's not my fault you're so ticklish."
"Yeah, well, I don't remember us kissing. I remember what happened clearly, and we didn't kiss!"
Buffy watched a look of embarrassment appear on Spike's face as he reread the summary. He said quickly, "They're probably just making it up, luv. Like they did with the Spawn stuff."
"Yeah," Buffy said. "Do you think we should watch the episode again, to make sure?"
Buffy loved the look of horror that appeared on Spike's face when she said that, confirming her thoughts. "I don't think there's any point, luv. We might as well just read this."
"Yeah, okay."
*Right, then,* Buffy thought. *The minute he's gone I'm gonna watch the end of that episode, and see what he's trying to hide.*
Grinning to herself, she started to read the story.
""Spike moaned and held her so tightly she couldn't move as he nibbled at her lips, rubbed her mouth with his tongue." That is gross."
"You didn't seem to think so the other night at the Bronze," Spike said, grinning.
"Yeah, well, I just wasn't thinking then," Buffy said quickly, hoping he wouldn't guess that she *had* been thinking about it, a lot, since then.
"Listen to this line, Slayer. "Her final thought before she reached her house was that Spike was a better kisser than Riley." Now isn't that interesting?"
"Well, it's not hard. Kissing Riley's like kissing a piece of cardboard, only worse. Don't think it's some big achievement to be better than him, cos it's not."
Spike smirked at her,
"What?" she asked, confused.
"I notice you didn't deny it, pet."
Buffy turned scarlet. "Well, it wasn't true. That went without saying."
"Sure. I believe you, luv."
*******
Buffy read the fic right down to the end. Strange as it was, she was really enjoying reading it, and from the look on Spike's face, he was too. She half wished this was how it had been, because then she could have shown Riley up. He would have been off with his vampire friends and she could have been secretly seeing Spike. She could picture the look on his face if it had been real and he'd found out. Shame it wasn't true.
She read the last line of the story, and let out a cry of outrage. "It isn't finished! I want to know what happens!"
"Isn't it obvious," Spike said, almost bitterly. "You see the error in your ways and dump me for the soldier boy. That's how it works, right?"
Buffy couldn't believe how pissed he sounded. "Well, I think the author was pretty big on us being together, so maybe we gave Riley a long and painful death instead."
Spike smiled slightly then. "Do you think we got to torture him first?"
"After what he did to me? You can count on it!"
Spike grinned at her, then went back to the main page.
"Only one more one to look at," he said, and clicked on S/X.
Looking at the list of fics, he chose one called "Spike vs Xander," by a person called skyz.
Spike read a little way down, then said with glee, "Looks like I get to have a fight with Xander in this one! And I get a shoulder massage from you. The two things I'd most like to have."
"Unfortunately for you, they're also the two things you're never gonna get."
Spike read more of the story, as he and Xander prepared to fight.
""Okay," Willow said as she stood at the foot of the coffee table, hands on hips her resolve face firmly in place.
All eyes turned to her.
"Pick up your cans," she ordered." Spike stopped for a moment. "What?"
Buffy, confused, read aloud the next part.
""On three then. One...Two..Three," Willow yelled.
Xander tore the cap off the can of cheese and immediately began devouring it."
Buffy looked over at Spike. "That's so ridiculous. I can't believe someone would write about you having a Squirty Cheese battle with Xander."
"Did I win?"
"What?!"
"Did I beat him?"
Buffy read further down. "Spike fumbled with his own can, before he got the cap off and hesitantly sprayed some into his mouth. His face scrunched up and he gagged.
"What?! I don't *lose*, do I?"
"Err, let's see. "Xander jumped to his feet, the snoopy dance coming forth as he raised his arms above his head.
"I win!!!!!!!!" Looks like you do, Spike."
Spike glared at the computer screen. "As if I'd lose to the whelp! I'd beat him at anything!"
"Even a squirty cheese battle?"
"*Especially* a squirty cheese battle."
Buffy grinned at him. "Bet you couldn't beat me!"
"Bet I could!"
"Well, we'll see!"
Buffy jumped out of her chair, and ran into the kitchen. A few minutes later she returned, looking very disappointed.
"What is it, luv?"
"We're all out of squirty cheese."
"What do you want some of that for?"
"So we can battle, and I can beat you." She pondered for a moment, an idea coming to her, when she heard Spike say,
"Look, there's another chapter. I'll definitely beat him in this one."
Spike clicked on it, then registered the title. "Spike vs Dawn. Damn it!"
He was about to click the back button, when Buffy shoved him out of the way. "Wait, I wanna read this."
She read a little way down, the burst out laughing.
"What is it this time, luv?"
"Oh my god! This story has you doing the Macarena in it!"
"What's the macarena?"
"You don't know?" Spike shook his head, confused. "Oh, this is too funny! We have to try this too!"
"What do you mean, we have to try this?! Try what?" But Buffy was already logging off.
"You wait here," she said excitably. "I'll be back in a minute."
Buffy hurried out into the hall, and quickly dialled the number of the Magic Box.
"Hello, Magic Box."
"Hi Willow."
"Oh, hey Buffy."
"Listen, Will, have you nearly finished that research yet?"
"It depends. Why?"
"Do you want to play a game?"
*******
Buffy went back into the dining room a few minutes later, grinning madly.
Spike marched over to her. "What was that all about?"
Buffy just grabbed his arm and dragged him into the living room. "Stand there," she said, and pushed him into the centre of the room. She then ran over to the CD player, grabbed a CD, and put it in.
Spike stared at her confused, until the music started blasting out.
# . . .Come and find me, my name is Macarena, always at the party, con las chicas que soy buena, come join me, dance with me. . .#
"No! No! NOOOOO!"
"Oh, come on, Spike. It'll be fun!"
"I am NOT dancing!"
"Sure you are. It's easy! Look."
Buffy then proceeded to teach Spike how to dance the Macarena.
"Okay, now you wiggle, jump to face to your left, and clap. And then you start all over again."
"Isn't it kinda pointless, luv?"
"Yeah, but it's fun. Go on, try it."
Spike didn't really see the point in trying to argue with her. She had that look on her face that told him he'd end up as dust if he did, so he started to dance, trying to look as evil as possible in the process.
"Okay, good. Now you wiggle. . ."
"No way!"
"Wiggle!"
"No!"
"Wiggle, or I'll make you!"
"How are you gonna do that, luv?"
Buffy strode forward, placed one hand on either side of his hips, and made him wiggle.
"There! Now you just repeat it."
"Only if you do it too."
"Fine then!"
Buffy went and stood next to Spike, and started to dance with him. She could tell just by watching him that he was trying to make himself look as "evil" as he could, but the fact was the eviller he tried to look, the funnier he became. Buffy was starting to enjoy herself, but she noticed Spike *still* wasn't wiggling.
"Spike, you have to WIGGLE!"
"I told you, pet. I'm not doing that part!"
Buffy stepped forward once more, and started to make him wiggle. He was starting to get into it when. . .
"What the hell is going on here?!"
Buffy jumped round to see Xander standing in the doorway, eyes wide.
"Me and Spike were just doing the macarena."
"And in what world is any part of that sentence *not* wrong?"
"Awww, come on Xander, it's fun."
"Dancing with Spike is fun?"
Spike stepped towards Xander. "Hey, it's not fun for me. She made me do this."
Buffy spun Spike round, forcefully. "What do you mean, it's not fun for you?!"
Suddenly, Willow came in though the door, waving a supermarket bag in the air.
"I got them!" she said happily.
"Got what?" Xander asked suspiciously.
"The cans of squirty cheese. Buffy said something about a game. . ."
"Yeah," Buffy said, striding forwards purposefully, and taking the bag off her. "It's a squirty cheese race, and we're all gonna play. We each get one can of squirty cheese, and we have to eat it as fast as we can. The loser has to pay for the cheese."
"What about the winner?" Spike asked.
"They get the honour of being the winner."
"This is really dumb," Xander said.
"Scared I'll beat ya, whelp?" Spike said.
"Scared? Me? No way." Xander reached for the cheese, and held it at the ready. Everyone else followed suit and waited.
"Okay," Buffy said. "3, 2, 1, GO!"
They all started to squirt the cheese into their mouths. After only a few seconds both Buffy and Willow started to gag, but Spike and Xander kept going.
As the girls gave up, the guys continued to devour the cheese as fast as they could. Xander was squirting frantically, but Spike finished first.
"Ha! Take that, Xander!" Spike said, gleefully.
"It was only a game," Xander said bitterly.
"Just cos you lost! Can't take the fact that you were beaten by a vampire!"
"It was stupid!"
"Yeah? You wouldn't have thought it was stupid if you'd have won, would you Harris? Huh?"
Buffy just laughed. "How can you guys eat that stuff?"
"No tastebuds," Spike said.
"See, you cheated!" Xander said, cheese spraying from his mouth as he spoke.
"I did not! Spike yelled back, spraying even more cheese. "There was no rule saying you had to be able to taste the stuff!"
"Say it, don't spray it."
"Hey, hey!" Buffy ran between the two of them. "It was a cheese squirting contest. Nothing big."
"I still won, though."
"Zip it, Spike!"
"But. . ."
"Zip!"
*******
Okay, so what did you all think? Please R/R!!! The story Kisses is by TinaBS, and the story Spike VS Xander is by skye, and they're both on Fanfiction.net. They're really good stories, and you should all go over and read them. And then review them as well and tell the authors how great they are!
Please keep your ideas coming! The next part should be out by Saturday. Have a good week!
A/N: Thanks everyone for the reviews! And also thanks for all the suggestions for websites and fanfics for them to see. I realised when I was writing this that there was far too much good fanfic for them to see to put in one chapter, so I'm gonna have some more later. Just for the purposes of this story, I've put all the stories on one made up fanfic site. All the fics I've mentioned are REALLY GOOD and I've put links to them at the bottom. **********
Buffy hung up the phone, and wandered absent-mindedly back into the living room.
"So, what did she want?"
Buffy jumped.
"I thought I told you to leave, Spike."
"Yeah, well, I didn't. What did she want?"
Buffy sighed, and flopped down next to him. "She said she found a spell that could help us find the whereabouts of this Mohra demon. She's gonna be late home, cos she wants to research it a bit more, maybe get some of the ingredients."
"So, we're gonna be all alone, are we?" He raised his eyebrows suggestively at her.
"Yeah, except for Dawn," Buffy said, hoping he wasn't about to suggest what she thought he was. "Why?"
"Well, I just thought we could surf the net for a bit."
Buffy stared at him, amazed. Was he actually suggesting they did something that didn't involve fighting or nakedness. Or both.
"Yeah, all right."
*******
Buffy stared at the search engine in front of her.
"So," she said, "which one shall we look at?"
Spike scanned the list, and then pointed at a link near the bottom.
"This one sounds good. Buffyfics.net."
Buffy clicked it, and watched the site load. ""BuffyFics: The ONLY place for all your fanfiction needs." What's that all about?"
Spike scrolled down the page, and then said, "Well, first we gotta pick a category, luv. Shall we have them listed by author, publish date or character?"
"Character," Buffy said decidedly. "I'm not sure what's going to be there, but there's no harm in looking, right?"
She clicked the link, and was taken to another list of choices. "Okay, which character do we want them centred around. Buffy, Willow, Xander, Giles, Angel, Spike. . ."
"Well, obviously we're gonna have 'em about me, luv." He pulled the mouse away from her, and chose "Spike Fics."
When the page loaded, they were faced by yet more choices. Buffy stared at them confusedly. "S/A, Spawn, Spuffy, S/X? Where are we supposed to start?"
"Well, how about at the beginning? Try S/A, whatever that is."
"Okay." Buffy clicked S/A, then quickly chose a story, ignoring the NC-17 warning.
Spike read the story half-heartedly, wondering why he was doing this. It had been fun visiting sites that made fun of Buffy, but reading stories was something different altogether. Then he noticed that the story was about all about him, Angel, Drusilla and Darla. It was set before he came to Sunnydale, and before Angel got a soul.
He was starting to get interested, when Buffy, who was a much faster reader than he was, suddenly burst out laughing.
"What's so funny?"
Buffy tried to speak, but was laughing so hard it was impossible, so she settled for simply pointing at a line near the bottom of the screen.
Spike found the part she had pointed to, and started to read. A few seconds later, however, he stood up so suddenly his chair flew backwards into the wall.
"HOW DID THEY KNOW ABOUT THAT?!"
"What?!"
Buffy was sure that if Spike could have blushed, he would have resembled a tomato. "I mean. . . what are they on? Me and the poof?! That's crazy!"
"Yu-huh."
Spike sheepishly went to retrieve his chair, and once he'd brought it back, said quietly, "You know those flashbacks they had in that episode we watched earlier?"
"Yeah."
"You don't suppose they have any others in any episodes, do they? Not that I have anything to hide, or anything, but. . ."
"Well, we'll see when we watch, won't we." Buffy let out a huge grin. "And if there are, all the more fun for me!"
Buffy clicked back to the list of Spike fics, then looked at the next one. "Spawn?" she said slowly. "Wonder what that's about."
She clicked the link, and then chose another story called "The Key to My Heart." She read it carefully, unsure of what she might find, then, about halfway down, let out a cry of disgust.
"What is it, pet?"
"This is just sick! These people must have no lives to write about this. I mean, how twisted would they have to be to so much as think this?!"
Spike read the passage out loud.
""Oh, Spike, I haven't been entirely honest with you. The thing is, Spike, I love you."
"Bit? I haven't been entirely honest with you either. It's not the Slayer I love. It's you."
Spike then stepped forward and captured Dawn's mouth in a kiss. It was sweet at first, but quickly got more passionate as Spike began to explore Dawn's throat with his tongue. Dawn clung to him as. . ."
"Okay, that's enough, Spike. It's gross enough without you reading it out for the world to hear."
Spike grinned at her, and read a little further down. "Ooh, Slayer, I wouldn't read the rest of this if I were you."
"Why not?"
"Let's just say the fic is rated "R" for a reason."
"Oh my god!" Buffy said, as she read the rest of the page. "My sister is pure and innocent! She doesn't even know about this stuff!"
Spike raised an eyebrow at her.
"Okay, maybe that's pushing it a little, but people still don't have to write about it. She's 15!"
"Okay, I'm thinking we'd better get off this page before you kill someone. We'll look at something else instead."
They went back to the main page, and chose Spuffy fics. After scanning the list, Spike chose a story called "Kisses."
Buffy read the story description this time, deciding she was sick of reading stuff she *really* didn't want to. "What if Spike hadn't been dreaming in Out of My Mind when he kissed Buffy?" Buffy looked at Spike. "What's it talking about? What's "Out of My Mind?""
"Guess it's an episode."
Buffy thought hard and vaguely recalled that title being on one of the boxes of videos. "I think it was the one we missed the end of. You know, when you attacked me."
"It's not my fault you're so ticklish."
"Yeah, well, I don't remember us kissing. I remember what happened clearly, and we didn't kiss!"
Buffy watched a look of embarrassment appear on Spike's face as he reread the summary. He said quickly, "They're probably just making it up, luv. Like they did with the Spawn stuff."
"Yeah," Buffy said. "Do you think we should watch the episode again, to make sure?"
Buffy loved the look of horror that appeared on Spike's face when she said that, confirming her thoughts. "I don't think there's any point, luv. We might as well just read this."
"Yeah, okay."
*Right, then,* Buffy thought. *The minute he's gone I'm gonna watch the end of that episode, and see what he's trying to hide.*
Grinning to herself, she started to read the story.
""Spike moaned and held her so tightly she couldn't move as he nibbled at her lips, rubbed her mouth with his tongue." That is gross."
"You didn't seem to think so the other night at the Bronze," Spike said, grinning.
"Yeah, well, I just wasn't thinking then," Buffy said quickly, hoping he wouldn't guess that she *had* been thinking about it, a lot, since then.
"Listen to this line, Slayer. "Her final thought before she reached her house was that Spike was a better kisser than Riley." Now isn't that interesting?"
"Well, it's not hard. Kissing Riley's like kissing a piece of cardboard, only worse. Don't think it's some big achievement to be better than him, cos it's not."
Spike smirked at her,
"What?" she asked, confused.
"I notice you didn't deny it, pet."
Buffy turned scarlet. "Well, it wasn't true. That went without saying."
"Sure. I believe you, luv."
*******
Buffy read the fic right down to the end. Strange as it was, she was really enjoying reading it, and from the look on Spike's face, he was too. She half wished this was how it had been, because then she could have shown Riley up. He would have been off with his vampire friends and she could have been secretly seeing Spike. She could picture the look on his face if it had been real and he'd found out. Shame it wasn't true.
She read the last line of the story, and let out a cry of outrage. "It isn't finished! I want to know what happens!"
"Isn't it obvious," Spike said, almost bitterly. "You see the error in your ways and dump me for the soldier boy. That's how it works, right?"
Buffy couldn't believe how pissed he sounded. "Well, I think the author was pretty big on us being together, so maybe we gave Riley a long and painful death instead."
Spike smiled slightly then. "Do you think we got to torture him first?"
"After what he did to me? You can count on it!"
Spike grinned at her, then went back to the main page.
"Only one more one to look at," he said, and clicked on S/X.
Looking at the list of fics, he chose one called "Spike vs Xander," by a person called skyz.
Spike read a little way down, then said with glee, "Looks like I get to have a fight with Xander in this one! And I get a shoulder massage from you. The two things I'd most like to have."
"Unfortunately for you, they're also the two things you're never gonna get."
Spike read more of the story, as he and Xander prepared to fight.
""Okay," Willow said as she stood at the foot of the coffee table, hands on hips her resolve face firmly in place.
All eyes turned to her.
"Pick up your cans," she ordered." Spike stopped for a moment. "What?"
Buffy, confused, read aloud the next part.
""On three then. One...Two..Three," Willow yelled.
Xander tore the cap off the can of cheese and immediately began devouring it."
Buffy looked over at Spike. "That's so ridiculous. I can't believe someone would write about you having a Squirty Cheese battle with Xander."
"Did I win?"
"What?!"
"Did I beat him?"
Buffy read further down. "Spike fumbled with his own can, before he got the cap off and hesitantly sprayed some into his mouth. His face scrunched up and he gagged.
"What?! I don't *lose*, do I?"
"Err, let's see. "Xander jumped to his feet, the snoopy dance coming forth as he raised his arms above his head.
"I win!!!!!!!!" Looks like you do, Spike."
Spike glared at the computer screen. "As if I'd lose to the whelp! I'd beat him at anything!"
"Even a squirty cheese battle?"
"*Especially* a squirty cheese battle."
Buffy grinned at him. "Bet you couldn't beat me!"
"Bet I could!"
"Well, we'll see!"
Buffy jumped out of her chair, and ran into the kitchen. A few minutes later she returned, looking very disappointed.
"What is it, luv?"
"We're all out of squirty cheese."
"What do you want some of that for?"
"So we can battle, and I can beat you." She pondered for a moment, an idea coming to her, when she heard Spike say,
"Look, there's another chapter. I'll definitely beat him in this one."
Spike clicked on it, then registered the title. "Spike vs Dawn. Damn it!"
He was about to click the back button, when Buffy shoved him out of the way. "Wait, I wanna read this."
She read a little way down, the burst out laughing.
"What is it this time, luv?"
"Oh my god! This story has you doing the Macarena in it!"
"What's the macarena?"
"You don't know?" Spike shook his head, confused. "Oh, this is too funny! We have to try this too!"
"What do you mean, we have to try this?! Try what?" But Buffy was already logging off.
"You wait here," she said excitably. "I'll be back in a minute."
Buffy hurried out into the hall, and quickly dialled the number of the Magic Box.
"Hello, Magic Box."
"Hi Willow."
"Oh, hey Buffy."
"Listen, Will, have you nearly finished that research yet?"
"It depends. Why?"
"Do you want to play a game?"
*******
Buffy went back into the dining room a few minutes later, grinning madly.
Spike marched over to her. "What was that all about?"
Buffy just grabbed his arm and dragged him into the living room. "Stand there," she said, and pushed him into the centre of the room. She then ran over to the CD player, grabbed a CD, and put it in.
Spike stared at her confused, until the music started blasting out.
# . . .Come and find me, my name is Macarena, always at the party, con las chicas que soy buena, come join me, dance with me. . .#
"No! No! NOOOOO!"
"Oh, come on, Spike. It'll be fun!"
"I am NOT dancing!"
"Sure you are. It's easy! Look."
Buffy then proceeded to teach Spike how to dance the Macarena.
"Okay, now you wiggle, jump to face to your left, and clap. And then you start all over again."
"Isn't it kinda pointless, luv?"
"Yeah, but it's fun. Go on, try it."
Spike didn't really see the point in trying to argue with her. She had that look on her face that told him he'd end up as dust if he did, so he started to dance, trying to look as evil as possible in the process.
"Okay, good. Now you wiggle. . ."
"No way!"
"Wiggle!"
"No!"
"Wiggle, or I'll make you!"
"How are you gonna do that, luv?"
Buffy strode forward, placed one hand on either side of his hips, and made him wiggle.
"There! Now you just repeat it."
"Only if you do it too."
"Fine then!"
Buffy went and stood next to Spike, and started to dance with him. She could tell just by watching him that he was trying to make himself look as "evil" as he could, but the fact was the eviller he tried to look, the funnier he became. Buffy was starting to enjoy herself, but she noticed Spike *still* wasn't wiggling.
"Spike, you have to WIGGLE!"
"I told you, pet. I'm not doing that part!"
Buffy stepped forward once more, and started to make him wiggle. He was starting to get into it when. . .
"What the hell is going on here?!"
Buffy jumped round to see Xander standing in the doorway, eyes wide.
"Me and Spike were just doing the macarena."
"And in what world is any part of that sentence *not* wrong?"
"Awww, come on Xander, it's fun."
"Dancing with Spike is fun?"
Spike stepped towards Xander. "Hey, it's not fun for me. She made me do this."
Buffy spun Spike round, forcefully. "What do you mean, it's not fun for you?!"
Suddenly, Willow came in though the door, waving a supermarket bag in the air.
"I got them!" she said happily.
"Got what?" Xander asked suspiciously.
"The cans of squirty cheese. Buffy said something about a game. . ."
"Yeah," Buffy said, striding forwards purposefully, and taking the bag off her. "It's a squirty cheese race, and we're all gonna play. We each get one can of squirty cheese, and we have to eat it as fast as we can. The loser has to pay for the cheese."
"What about the winner?" Spike asked.
"They get the honour of being the winner."
"This is really dumb," Xander said.
"Scared I'll beat ya, whelp?" Spike said.
"Scared? Me? No way." Xander reached for the cheese, and held it at the ready. Everyone else followed suit and waited.
"Okay," Buffy said. "3, 2, 1, GO!"
They all started to squirt the cheese into their mouths. After only a few seconds both Buffy and Willow started to gag, but Spike and Xander kept going.
As the girls gave up, the guys continued to devour the cheese as fast as they could. Xander was squirting frantically, but Spike finished first.
"Ha! Take that, Xander!" Spike said, gleefully.
"It was only a game," Xander said bitterly.
"Just cos you lost! Can't take the fact that you were beaten by a vampire!"
"It was stupid!"
"Yeah? You wouldn't have thought it was stupid if you'd have won, would you Harris? Huh?"
Buffy just laughed. "How can you guys eat that stuff?"
"No tastebuds," Spike said.
"See, you cheated!" Xander said, cheese spraying from his mouth as he spoke.
"I did not! Spike yelled back, spraying even more cheese. "There was no rule saying you had to be able to taste the stuff!"
"Say it, don't spray it."
"Hey, hey!" Buffy ran between the two of them. "It was a cheese squirting contest. Nothing big."
"I still won, though."
"Zip it, Spike!"
"But. . ."
"Zip!"
*******
Okay, so what did you all think? Please R/R!!! The story Kisses is by TinaBS, and the story Spike VS Xander is by skye, and they're both on Fanfiction.net. They're really good stories, and you should all go over and read them. And then review them as well and tell the authors how great they are!
Please keep your ideas coming! The next part should be out by Saturday. Have a good week!
