Disclaimer:I do not own Inuyasha. I just like kidnapping him! ^_^
Author's note: Thanks for the reviews! *does happy dance* Warning, excessive exposure to Random Madness may cause you to want cheese-flavored ice cream with walnuts...or a psychiatrist...

RaNdOm MaDnEsS
By:Dew...and Mony...but mostly Dew...

Dew: Greetings. Today is a very special day on Random Madness!

Mony: My birthday?

Dew: No.

Mony: No, it's really my birthday!

Dew: Okay, so today is a not-so-special day on Random Madness.

Mony: Meanie.

Dew: *sigh* Fine, have a cupcake if it'll get you to shut up.

Mony: *stuffs cupcake in her mouth*

Cupcake: This cupcake will self-destruct in 5...4...3...2...1...*self-destructs*

Mony: *blown away* Mony is blasting off again!

Dew: *watches until Mony's out of sight then does happy dance* Today is once again a very special day on Random Madness! It seems that word of our little show has gotten out into the anime community, and all Inuyasha characters have beefed up their security. What they don't know is that nothing can keep me out!

Mony: *returns* Or me!

Dew: Good, you're back. *holds out a Santa hat* Pick today's guest, Mony.

Mony: *pulls a name out of hat* Today's guest will be...the amazing demon-exterminator...Miroku's fiance...Sango!

Dew:NOOOOOOOO! I wanted Miroku for myself! *starts to sob*

Mony:*pats Dew's back* It's okay. We all knew this would happen one day.

Dew:*sniffles* You're right. I should be happy for them...*conjures up warp-hole and jumps in, followed by Mony*

Dew and Mony: *arrive at Miroku's mansion*

Dew: This was unexpected...the warp-hole was supposed to take us to wherever Sango was...

Mony: *throws rock at a window*

Dew: O.o That was even more unexpected. Why did you break the window Mony?

Mony: *shrugs* I need anger management.

Dew: @_@

Sango: *opens door*

Mony: *jumps in front of Sango* Boomshaka!

Sango: *grabs Hiraikotsu out of nowhere and goes into battle stance*

Mony: *hides behind Dew* Save me! Boomshaka boomshaka!

Dew: *mutters something unmentionable about stupid buzz-words*

Sango: Who are you people, demons?

Dew: No. Just television hosts.

Sango: *puts down Hiraikotsu*

Mony: I'm also a part-time door to door solicitor!

Sango: *picks up Hiraikotsu*

Dew: *knocks Sango out with mallet * Sheesh, she could hurt someone with that thing!

Mony: I wonder what she was doing at Miroku's house?

Dew: I try not to wonder anything that you wonder, Mony. Wouldn't want to catch your stupidity...

Dew and Mony: *throw unconscious Sango in the back seat of their Ferrari, and take off at 150 mph*

Mony: Where'd the cool car come from, again?

Dew: *puts on dark sunglasses as she slams the accelerator* Thank the producers.

Mony and Dew: *arrive at the studio with today's prisoner...ummm...I meant guest*

Dew: While today's guest is...ummm...gaining consciousness Mony will present today's moral.

Mony: Since when do we have a moral?

Dew: Since the producers said the show either needs more educational content or dingoes named Dango.

Mony: *mumbles something about rather having dingoes*

Dew: *holds up flyswatter threateningly*

Mony: Today's moral is, do not play jump rope with an elephant's tail in the middle of a pool of tapioca pudding during a lunar eclipse as it will cause you to become obsessed with index cards.

Dew: Okaaaay...

Sango: I don't get it.

Mony: Then you are enlightened.

Sango: This is what I get for eating cheese-flavored ice cream with walnuts before bed...

Mony: You think this is a dream?

Sango: Where else but a dream would I be kidnapped and end up in a studio that seems to be made of...gelatin...

Dew: *nods* Yes the studio is made of gelatin. Concrete flavored to be exact.

Mony: But this isn't-

Dew: *stuffs a sock in Mony's mouth* Time for our unanswerable question. Sango, which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Sango: The chicken.

Dew: Why do you say that?

Sango: You said chicken before you said egg.

Mony: She's got you there, Dew.

Dew: *smacks Mony with flyswatter* Shut up.

Sango: Are you two absolutely sure this is a dream?

Mony: Ummm...boomshaka!

Sango and Dew: @_@

Dew: I'll never get what that is supposed to mean...

Just the Facts Fax Machine': *prints out something on neon green paper*

Dew: What is it?

Mony: *picks up fax* A message from the producers.

Dew: What does it say?

Mony: Your tiny muddy shoes have ruined my goat's motor home and you shall have no boomerang for New Years chocolate.

Dew: Really?

Mony: Yes. Then it says that the more sane producer has taken over the fax and that we have received fan-mail.

Dew:I always knew at least one of the producers was crazy...

Sango: This is getting to be weird.

Dew: Smile for the cameras and pretend it's not, that's what I do.

Mony: Boomshaka!

Dew: -.- The crazy producer is the one who comes up with the buzz-words, I just know it...

Mony: * pulls fan-mail out of nowhere which is written on a sticky-note* I got the fan-mail!

Dew: -.- Gee, we're SOOOO popular.

Mony: *reading sticky note*
Dear hosts of Random Madness,
Where do you buy concrete flavored gelatin?
Sincerely,
The Smartest Idiot

Dew:*blinks* Does this person know their name is an oxymoron? Mony, you take this one.

Mony:I can't. Rubber baby buggy bumpers have taken over Antarctica, and Christopher Columbus must go retrieve the chocolate pies.

Sango: She's lost it, heck, I'm dreaming this so I've lost it!

Dew: I was afraid this would happen, well, not really.

Sango: What would happen?

Dew: Over exposure to concrete flavored gelatin has a tendency to cause short periods of extreme inanity.

Sango: What can we do about it?

Dew: Well, we could just leave the studio for awhile, or we could take her to a mental hospital...

Sango: I vote for hospital!

Dew: THIS IS NOT A DEMOCRACY...but since I was already going to suggest that I second the motion! ^_^

Mony: Hey, I'm back to normal!

Dew: *puts away the straitjacket* Darn...

Mony: To answer The Smartest Idiot's question, concrete flavored gelatin is not available in stores, due to certain health risks.

Dew: In other words, you could end up like Mony.

Sango: Why aren't you like the crazy one?

Dew: Me!? Oh, I've got magic...

Sango: *nods* I see.

Dew: Mony, Did Christopher Columbus ever get those chocolate pies?

Mony: Yeah.

Dew: Then where are they?

Mony: I hate chocolate pies so I threw them away.

Dew: Good. I hate chocolate pies too.

Sango: I like chocolate pies.

Dew: Sorry majority says that all people on Random Madness hate chocolate pies. It's 2 to 1.

Sango: I thought there was no democracy?

Dew: There isn't. I was just trying to make you feel better about having no say.

Sango: I'm really starting to doubt this is a dream...

Mony: You are correct sir!

Dew: Stop saying that! You did that last episode!

Mony: ...Boomshaka!

Just the Facts Fax Machine': *prints out something on a block of wood*

Mony: *reads the fax*

Dew: What does it say?

Mony: We're out of time.

Dew: Really!? Oh man, guess we have to return her. *conjures warp-hole*

Mony, Dew, and Sango: *jump into warphole*

5 hours later...

Mony: That took longer than usual.

Dew: I knew we should have taken a right turn at the talking panda...

Sango: When do I get to wake up?

Mony: Boomshaka!

Just the Facts Fax Machine': *magically appears and prints out something on a sock*

Dew: *reads fax* Boomshaka translates into You were never asleep to begin with, moron'. Wow, I never would have guessed that.

Sango: *grabs Hiraikotsu out of nowhere*

Dew and Mony: KYAAAAAAAAAAA!

Just the Facts Fax Machine': *prints out something on a a slice of moldy cheese*

Mony: *stops screaming to read the fax*

Dew: *stops screaming* What does it say?

Mony: *reading fax* Run you idiots, run like the wind!

~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~
*Producers: Once again an unfortunate event has occurred. While our hosts were reading the fax they were hit by a very angry Sango and her very large boomerang. We hope they will recover in time for the next episode or we will be forced to hire a temporary replacement and dock their pay.
Dew: Dock my pay? I don't get paid!
Producers: Then you will owe us money.
Dew: Do you accept payment in wazoos?