A Better Life ~ By Angry Cupid
Chapter One
Pan stood at the entrance of her room and let the book bag she was holding slip from her fingers until it hit the floor. She took a deep breath as she envisioned all the homework she had to get started on, certainly not a pleasant thought. The time she got home until she went to bed was spent slaving away on her assignments, with a few breaks in between. All that work didn't amount to much in the excruciatingly difficult school system of Japan, the classes were ranked and you had to compete with the smartest kids in the class or fall behind. Pan was tired of working hard just like her father asked only to be rewarded with disappointment. She wondered what good it was doing her.
Pan sunk to her knees to gather her books. As she thought of tomorrow's exams and how long she would have to stay studying for them, the desk in the corner seemed to mock her. She didn't know how long she could continue living like this.
Being Saiyan didn't help, either. She could fly, lift outrageously heavy objects, and even fire ki blasts, but Pan was still stuck inside fretting over a chem test. She dreamed of living the warrior's life, roaming from battle to battle, with no obligation but to be the victor, and bound to nothing but to honor. The life of her ancestors called to her, and she couldn't stop waiting for things to suddenly transform into what she had always wanted. She couldn't stop waiting for a better life.
Pan envisioned herself standing at the edge of a cliff on some remote planet, staring at war-ravaged land, a desert breeze swirling around her, dressed in aristocratic Saiyan armor. She imagined herself waiting for her rival to arrive, knowing a long and exhausting battle was ahead of her, but this battle was one she could conquer. But instead of being on this planet she was stuck at home with a bland existence that consisted of sleeping, eating, going to school, and studying, with no eventful interruption. The most exciting thing in her life was the upcoming fall festival, which would consist of a parade and some foreign food. She wondered how a Saiyan could end up with nothing interesting to look forward to but some stupid parade.
As she unloaded her books and binders onto her desk, she started to sketch another fantasy in her head. In this fantasy, Pan stopped studying and doing her homework, and started missing classes. Instead of being racked with guilt, she imagined herself finally carefree and released from the chains her school had created. She imagined her having a relationship with a man her parents would never approve of, a bold and daring man that was as reckless as she would become. She imagined them running off together, leaving her ordinary life behind.
When she immediately suddenly imagined that man as Vegeta, she nearly burst out laughing. The fantasy came to an abrupt halt, and Pan was aware of just how ridiculous it was. Vegeta must have been 40 years her senior, and although his Saiyan blood kept him from looking old and actually left him looking in his late 30s, the age difference was so outrageous she began to question how ever he managed to pop up in her head.
"Yeah right," she muttered to herself, "me and Vegeta. He's as old as my grandfather!"
Pan felt suddenly very foolish, and not just for that. She should not waste her time with idle dreams of better things, she had exams to study for, homework to finish, and notes to copy. Was the life of a student really that bad?
The office chair creaked as Pan sat in it, and she turned on the light above the desk with a click. This was the way she lived. How could she change it?
As the days passed and school progressed, Pan could not exterminate the longing in her heart. She was used to the long hours of studying, but there was no pleasure in a bland existence. Her friends and family and the interaction between them became a blur in her head, none of it seemed to matter. Pan tried to drag on, but the feeling of suffocation rose up in her. The feeling of meaningless, the mediocrity, and the yearning strangled her.
On top of that, she couldn't stop thinking of Vegeta. He was so impulsive and rebellious. Pan was fascinated with that attitude, he was obedient to no one but himself. While she was stuck repeating some meaningless cycle of events every day, he could take a spaceship and blast off to another planet and fight noble battles, engage in endless adventures, train to his heart's content. She wondered why he had settled down and had children and a wife. Pan would not even consider that he might be tired of living a life with no limits.
Vegeta's lifestyle was everything she could ever want, but it was Vegeta's lifestyle, not hers. Pan had to continue to go to school, carry conversations with her boring normal friends, come back home to the same studying and the same dull family that once wasn't dull at all. She wondered whatever happened to the days of her childhood where she would go on adventures with her old crush Trunks and her grandfather, fighting enemies and looking for dragonballs.
Now, at 16 years of age, Pan had assimilated into the general population. It didn't even matter that she and her father were Saiyans. Pan was just like any other Japanese teenager now. Pan was hopelessly ordinary.
She wondered if that could change, if she could run away from it all with that man of her dreams. At times when she wasn't feeling self-critical, she let herself imagine herself with Vegeta. Pan pictured herself in his arms, free from it all, tracing his collarbone with her finger and resting her head on his shoulder, her forehead on his neck.
Then, of course, she would come away feeling horrified and guilty. To think, she was daydreaming about being with her former crushes' father. Sure, he looked far younger than he was, but he was still out of her age range, to say the least. Normal people didn't long for people that were that much older, normal people dated people their age. Besides, how could Vegeta possibly feel the same? Pan scoffed at the odds of them getting together. It was wishing for the impossible.
The secret longing she held for Vegeta didn't make easy visits to the Briefs household. Being in the same room as Vegeta drove her crazy, her mind was spinning in contradictions. He was attractive, she couldn't deny it, and his attitude made her adore him.
Pan couldn't decide whether or not to stop hanging out with Bra, or to come over to her house constantly just to see Vegeta. It was a decision between dropping the infatuation or embracing it. Pan's heart screamed for her to be with Vegeta, but her common sense turned against her.
However hard her intuition pleaded with her not to continue, she knew that there was no escape. It wouldn't be long before Pan would betray her wit and turn to her desire. There was only so much she could take, and her limit was approaching. There was some vast weight she was holding onto, and everything would change if she let go.
She thought of this as she caught a glance at Vegeta stepping out of the training room, looking handsomer that she had ever seen him. She could not hold back, she was sick of it. She would do exactly what her mind told her. Pan would go to him.
