Chapter 25 - Sweet Release

It's amazing how quickly things can change. They've rescued Spike, and along with him, another .. whatever .. like Rebecca. The demon, his name is Jacob I remind myself, looks like he's been through the mill. Spike looks fine, well aside from the fact that he's unconscious. According to Jacob, Spike's pain was all high-tech, and it could have destroyed his brain.

It hurts. It hurts that no one but Anya let me know what happened. I mean, I get that Buffy's pre-occupied, and I can see that the others are too, but there was a time when I was at the centre of the action, but I'm not any more. A niggling voice tells me it's my own fault, that I excluded myself with my reaction to, well, Spike in particular, but Buffy too. It doesn't make it easier, but it at least shows me that maybe, I can put it right.

It hurts me to see Buffy in such pain. That the source of the pain is Spike, well, it makes it hurt a little more, but surprisingly, it's only a little. I love her. I always have, but these days it's the love of a friend. It's taken a while for me to get to the stage where I could say that without any doubts, but I can now. Anya? The woman I love, as a man loves a woman, isn't even human any more, yet I love her. She .. she .. I don't know. She wants me. She wants me in her bed, but I just don't know if she'll ever love me again. But only she cared enough to call me and let me know that everything had changed.

She asked me to come to the store, warning me to come by the tunnel. She didn't explain exactly what had happened, but once here, a lot became obvious. Those who are magically inclined are working on the means of rescuing Riley from his .. whatever. Infection, possession, I don't know.

Giles and Clem are chatting quietly, their eyes on the doorway to the training room, where I know Buffy is lying, curled around Spike, stroking his hair, loving him without thought for anything else. The way she always loves, when she lets herself.

I watched for a while, but I couldn't stay. It was a combination of discomfort at seeing her pain, and feeling that I was witnessing something so personal, so intimate, that I find my face flaming as I remember.

I've known that she loves him for a while. I hoped, at the beginning, that she'd get over it, but I should have known better. She loves with everything she is, it's her greatest strength, and at the same time, it's her greatest weakness.

There's some movement over at the table, and it's obvious that the women are ready for the first part of the rescue operation. Giles and Clem have noticed, too, and we watch as Jenna performs the spell that we hope will incapacitate Riley, focussing it into the jar in front of her. When it's complete, Anya caps the jar triumphantly, then looks around, suddenly nervous again.

She's going to face an armed man, and she's scared. I want to hold her, to tell her that I love her, but I don't know if that will be welcome. She catches my eye, and I decide I don't care what her reaction will be. I approach, and put my hands on her shoulders. Somehow, to put them right around her seems too .. familiar. Considering the things we've done together, that's a very odd notion, but ..

She looks up at me as my hands touch her, her eyes showing clearly the fear and excitement.

"Be careful," I tell her.

She looks at me, and I feel the question on her face. She's confused as to the reason for my telling her that.

"I love you, Anya. Come back safe."

She nods, apparently accepting my words without argument. She doesn't reciprocate, but she doesn't argue either.

She turns away, and takes a second to remind everyone of her plan, then disappears in a flash.

The moments that she's gone seem to go on forever. Willow seems to know what's happening, and keeps the rest of us up to date. At last, she tells us that Anya needs some help. For an instant, I misunderstand, thinking that she's in some sort of trouble, then I realise that she just means that I should go and help to bring Riley into the store.

I run outside, with Giles at my heels. We reach a very relieved Anya, who's apparently holding Riley upright with a single hand on his chest. For the first time I consider the possibility that she doesn't actually need any help.

"You could carry him yourself," I accuse.

"Well, duh, of course I could. It'd just look, well, silly, little thing like me carrying a big hulk like that. How Buffy could let herself get down and dirty with such an enormous .. "

She stops, noting Giles' removal of his glasses, and my embarrassed shuffling.

"Anyway," she continues. "Let's get him back to Willow."

Once back in the store, Giles helps me to take Riley into the training room. There he produces a set of chains, and uses them to secure Finn to some cleats on the wall which are normally hidden by the array of weapons that are stored there.

As we finish, Willow and Jenna come in, closely followed by Rebecca and Jacob.

"I'll get what's needed, then," Rebecca offers. "It shouldn't take too long."

She fiddles with her wrist for a second, and she's gone. All this disappearing is coming to seem almost an everyday occurrence to me. I shudder at the prospect.

Willow sets everything out on the floor, and sits cross-legged opposite Riley.

"Will the rest of you complete the circle?" she asks. "We'll need Buffy as well," she adds, looking at Giles with sightless eyes. He nods and goes to the couple at the other side of the room.

A few moments later, Buffy has joined us, as Willow completes her preparations. Closest to Riley, on either side, are Giles and I. Buffy's next to Giles, and then there's Jacob, and there's space next to him for Rebecca when she returns. On my other side is Anya, and then there's Clem with Jenna completing that side. Apparently, the more people present in the circle, the more secure the spell, the less chance of the energy escaping the circle to infect someone else.

Rebecca appears a few seconds later, dressed in a strange, transparent suit which doesn't seem to do anything other than make her look a little more bulky. She takes up her appointed position in the circle, and Willow begins.

The incantation is long, and in a language I don't understand. Not that that's surprising, because, well, I have enough problems with English. Willow continues, her hair wavering between black and red as she speaks, and her eyes are black. I'm scared, I admit it. I remember the last time I saw dark Willow. I can see Jenna watching Willow carefully too, and I know she's watching for the first sign that there's a problem.

The light level in the room drops, suddenly, and then it's as if Riley is spotlighted. He's glowing, white at first, but it's changing, becoming pinkish, swirling, enveloping him, clinging to him. Willow's words are getting louder, more insistent as she demands (I assume) that the energy leave its human host. I'm noticing a pattern now, the same words repeated over and over, and at last, the energy is being pulled towards the sphere in front of Willow. As it moves, I feel the .. evil. It chills me to the bone. It moves, slowly at first, but gathering speed until it's all contained within the sphere.

As quickly as the light dimmed, it's back to normal. Willow's slumped to the floor, but in front of her there's a sphere filled with angry purplish .. it looks like liquid. Without speaking, Giles lifts the sphere and hands it to Rebecca. She accepts it silently, and as she does so I notice that the sphere is looking less clear than it did a moment ago, as if the surface is cracking.

"Hurry," Giles advises, as Rebecca disappears.

Another interminable time passes. Even Buffy remains with the rest of us, waiting for Rebecca to return so that we can be sure of her success. I move to kneel beside Willow, finding her awake, but looking tired. She reassures me that she's fine, so I return my attention to the spot recently occupied by Rebecca. It seemed to me that the sphere wasn't going to last too long, and I find I'm almost holding my breath.

At last, she's back, looking shaken, but otherwise as she was. Jacob runs to her, enfolding her in a hug. The relief in the room is palpable. Between us, Giles and I help Willow into a chair, watching as she recovers.

"If you're ready?" Giles asks Jenna. She nods, knowing her part in the procedure. She moves her arms, muttering something under her breath, and the spell that had constrained Riley is gone. He slumps in his chains, the gun which was still in his hand, frozen there by the spell, falling to the floor.

He looks .. worse than I've ever seen. Pale and in pain and tired. Then, his face lights up, relief clear on his face.

"It's gone," he sighs. He looks around the assembled company, his eyes lighting on Buffy, but she doesn't notice. As soon as it was obvious that we'd been successful, she turned around, her attention once again focussed on Spike.

Riley's face drops visibly at the sight. He quickly gets it back under control, and smiles at the rest of us as Giles unchains him. I can see from the Watcher's demeanour that he's itching to find out what Riley knows, but even I can see that he's going to need food and sleep before he's of any use to anyone. Then, we've got to work out just how far we can trust Riley. His glance travels around the room, taking in the fact that there were three obvious demons in the group who saved him. He probably doesn't know about Anya, and Buffy didn't think he took her lack of humanity seriously when she told him. Regardless of what happens, he's got some learning to do. And it occurs to me, that I might be the best person to do the teaching. I mean, it wasn't so long ago, I'd have been agreeing with his point of view. It's been a while since I thought I'd be able to teach someone something, unless it has to do with the best way to fit a window, or make a joint for the frame. I just wonder if he'll be willing to learn, or whether he'll just betray us to his friends at the first opportunity.

The possibility of Anya being hurt makes me see red for a moment. At the first sign of any doubtful behaviour, I decide I'd rather kill him with my own hands than let him hurt anyone else in the room. Even Spike. Now, that's a turn up, isn't it?