Laughing out Loud

a songfic by Sylvan Snape

chapter one: Visitation

a/n: this is my first fic, so please flame me if it's bad. How else will I know? The DMB song "Spoon" inspires this fic

Spoon in spoon

Stirring my coffee

I thought of you

And turned to the gate

On my way came up with the answers

I scratched my head

And the answers were gone

I stood in front of St. Mungos, clutching my thermos to my chest. I could never bring myself to just walk in. There were people staring at me, going through the entrance themselves, wondering, I supposed, if I had just escaped or something. If they did, they weren't far from the truth, I had a real fear of being kept there.

A gloved hand reached across my shoulders, making me jump. I looked up to see Neville smiling down at me. He had grown so much since Voldemort had fallen at his hand, he was still a little chubby and his hair still looked like a pudding bowl, but he was tall, and self assured.

"Going to see him, are you?" He smiled at me knowingly.

I sighed, leaning into his embrace, "Yes I am, if I ever get up the courage."

"I can go in with you 'Mione, I'm going to visit Mum and Dad" His eyes clouded over, just for a second. I realized he had just as much trouble going in alone, now that his Gran was gone, than I did. So I smiled, linked my arm in his, and we went inside to see our families.

We sat in the waiting room together, until our names were called to go in. The visitor area was bright and garishly decorated with floating holly trees and red fairie lights. Trying to avoid having hot chocolate and autograph pads pushed at us, we shared my coffee and talked.

"Any luck with finding a cure for your parents?" I asked, knowing full well the answer.

"No, no," Neville responded sadly, "We thought Mum recognized her doctor the other day, but when she called him Mr. Churchill we guessed we were wrong." He smiled emptily at his own joke, then looked away to the entry. "What about you? Any luck finding a way to reach Profe..…Severus?"

"No, unfortunately," I mumbled into my mug. "Dr. Herron is doing all he can. He once got him to wiggle his fingers, but because of the barriers Severus put up over his own mind, nobody can reach him to try and draw him out. Or even tell if he's still in there at all…" Neville just nodded, telling I didn't want to talk about it anymore.

Just being there was almost too much. I was renowned for being so good at so many things, so able to find solutions. Yet, the one answer that mattered most, the one I needed to save him, escaped me somehow. I felt so frustrated and stupid, as if the solution was just sitting there in plain view, behind a plate of unbreakable glass. Neville put his arm over my shoulders and we sat quietly until my name was called.

"Hermione Snape, you may go in now." said the kindly old green haired mediwitch. I turned and kissed Neville on the cheek, making him blush slightly, some things never change, thank God, I told myself.

"Happy Christmas Neville."

"Happy Christmas Hermione."

A little sad, and more than a bit scared, I went in to see Severus.