Hurriedly, I started to pull a sheet off one of the many luxurious beds so that I could climb down the outside balcony with William, and I had just removed one of the corners of the bedding, when a voice interrupted my plotting: "I see you're still here."
Turning rapidly enough to cause my cape to billow out around me, I faced Diane who stood in the doorway with bloodshot eyes and grimy tear streaks down her face. Her makeup was smeared down gaunt cheeks and hair in shambles. "I figured you would have left by now," she explained, moving closer to me. "What, with all your 'devil's playground', the police are probably searching for you. Drug dealer? Ritzy burglar? Or are you something worse?"
I didn't answer her, but remained silent, shocked by her sudden valor. She merely moved closer to me, continuing to babble. "You and William hooking up in some big scandal? I won't tell because it doesn't really matter to me. All I need is my payment and that's it."
"Payment?" I echoed, still clutching part of the cream bed sheet in my hands.
"For whatever 'services' I give."
"You're a prostitute then."
"I'd prefer to be called a 'female escort'…but I'm also a model." She paused and tried peering through my black mask to dissect me for emotions. "About what you asked earlier…about my appearance…"
"Forget it," I said, not wanting to go into her pathetic lifestyle when I had an unconscious William to take care of. She was a distraction sent by the monsters in the basement to turn me away from my Lady. And, with my Lady's impatience building, I couldn't delay another sacrifice for long.
"No. I won't forget it," Diane stated. "You're the first person who's ever outright asked. The doctors tell me that I'm sick…'anorexia nervosa'…that's the technical name for it. But, a person can only go through so many hospitals before you give up hope. Ever been in a psychiatric hospital? Not as a patient because you look far too sane for that, but just visited?"
I pulled my cape tighter to me as I remembered marching down the hallways of Manticore's basement. How the anomalies had reached for us, wanting to rip our flesh from our childish muscles and drink our blood. I shut my eyes tightly as the past laser burned through my pupil and "duty" flashed across a projector screen.
"Daniel?" Diane was saying, reaching for me, and rapidly, I opened my eyes, pulling away from her.
"You're dying."
There was a long pause as music from the basement fluttered up to meet our ears. Unsteadily, her eyes flickered away, before they returned, tear-filled, to meet mine again.
"I know," she at last whispered, all of her past courage obliterated with one truth.
"Then stop it. Do something…It's no different than taking a knife to your wrists."
"No, it is different."
"How? Yours is just a slower suicide, but it's suicide all the same." I couldn't understand her. It didn't make sense that a person could be weak enough to merely stand back and let oneself die like she was doing. To willingly starve herself until she was nothing anymore but a shrunken form of what she used to be.
"I'm just psychotically fucked up," she acknowledged, and the expletive usage caught my attention immediately. Her voice caught in the back of her throat and she bent her head, trying not to cry. "You don't understand…"
"No, I don't."
"It's not like I want to die, but I don't want to live…I just want to be beautiful…and I was told that if I lost weight, I would be beautiful…" She looked up and her glassy eyes met mine. "Daniel…tell me, am I beautiful?"
I couldn't answer her. My throat had clenched up, and I tried swallowing to relax it. I wanted her to leave because I needed to retrieve William for the Blue Lady, yet, Diane's mental disturbances brought back memories of Zack accusing me of the same thing. "You're no different than the 'nomlies in the basement," he had told me. "You're just as screwed up as they are."
"Will you take off your mask?" she asked me.
"No."
"Why not? I just want to see you before you leave."
"Diane…I can't…I won't…"
She moved closer to me and reached up to touch my face. I didn't move, but held my position defiantly. Gently, her bony fingers touched my cheeks before trailing down the side of my face where they skimmed across the bottom of my mask. Then, silently, she slipped the mask over my head and I was fully exposed.
Her eyes widened at the sight of me, whether because she could at last see the darkness in me or for another unexplainable reason. Recoiling, with her hand covered her mouth, I saw the sadness fade into shock.
Dropping the sheet, I held out my hands to her, trying not to scream. "Is this what you wanted to see?" I hissed. "Is it?"
Mutely, she shook her head.
I pinched my lips tightly together, then whispered, "Whatever you think I am, I'm not. I want you to leave-"
"You're beautiful, Daniel."
"Excuse me?"
"You're beautiful."
For a moment, neither of us said anything until a single tear trickled down her cheek and her lips twitched awkwardly, trying to form a smile. Then, before disappeared back into the party, she whispered, "Good-bye, Daniel."
