Diclaimer: Nope, still don't own X-Men Evolution. He says he does, though! ::points at some fat, middle-aged man selling T-Shirts that say "To the Moon and back in .5 Seconds!" at a little cart:: ::watches as police officers and lawyers escort him away:: Hehe…
A/N: Amazing that this story is about the Acolytes being homeschooled, but it took a whole chapter to introduce this idea. Maybe the story has a chance! WOOO!!! Read.
Magneto sat back in his chair and looked at the ceiling. "That went rather well." He said to himself, "Gambit seemed really excited…maybe a little too excited, but excited nonetheless! He probably ran off to tell the rest of the minions about this great idea to get them excited too! Oh, this is going to be soooo much fun!" With a squeal, he set to work planning what they were going to do at Magneto's School of Wonders For Criminally Stupid Lackeys. Hey, Xavier's 'Institute' has an incredibly long and descriptive name! Why can't Magneto's? At least he didn't use the word 'Youngster'. Magneto snorted. Xavier was such a dweeb.
Meanwhile: In the common room:
"What? SCHOOL?!" Colossus sobbed, "I was always picked on in school!"
"Don't cry, Tinfoil Lad. Men don't cry. Unless you're a twink?" Pyro comforted him, "Hahahaha! Twink Tank! Get it? Cuz you're metal and big, and so are tanks, and you're a twink!"
"I'm not a twink!" Colossus cried harder, "I'm just sensitive!"
"Sh-yeah. Whatever you say, Twink Tank. Sensitive: codename for gay."
"Spaz, no making fun of partners." Gambit sighed. Always get Pyro if you want trouble. "In crime! Partners in CRIME!! Damn, you're sick. Get your mind out of the gutter." He added after the look he got from Pyro, "Anyway, Twi-Colossus. You'll rust if you keep crying."
Pyro had moved on to his next victim. "What about you, Fuzz Bub? What do you think of school? Do you even know what it is?" He had called Sabertooth 'Fuzz Bub' ever since Wolverine had said it and Sabertooth had made the mistake of recounting the story to the Acolytes. He hated that name.
"ssskooo?" Sabertooth grunted.
"Yes. Skoo." Pyro laughed.
In a fit of animal rage, Sabertooth picked up the easy chair he had been sitting on and threw it against the wall. He then proceeded to make savage animal noises and destroy everything within arm's length. This included Quicksilver as he returned from relieving himself in the facilities.
"Moooo!" Quicksilver mooed as he flew across the room and hit the wall.
Sabertooth had had enough of the restraints of one room. He ran out of the commonroom and proceeded out the door of the base to wreak havoc on Gotham City…or wherever they lived.
"Well, I think that's answer enough." Pyro laughed.
"Glad you find this funny! Now we have to clean this up or else we don't get dessert tonight!" Colossus wailed.
"Dude, Q-Tip, what did you say when Fuzz Bub threw you?" Pyro turned on Quicksilver.
"Uh…ahh?" He shrugged nervously.
"No, it sounded more like…new…coo…loo…or maybe MOO?"
"It was loo!" Quicksilver shouted, "Because I just got back from the loo!"
"Who shouts 'loo' when they get back from the loo?" Gambit put in. He didn't mind picking on Quicksilver, the annoying little brat.
"I meant coo! I said 'cool' because it felt cool flying through the air like that!"
"Cow." Colossus said, with a jealous look at Quicksilver's twiggy body, "You're so fat! How can you live like that?"
Pyro laughed the only laugh we've ever heard him laugh (but we've heard it quit often..the exact same one). It was a sexy, happy, maniacal laugh. Yum, "YOU SAID MOO!"
"SO?! YOU ALL HATE ME! I'M TELLING DADDY!!" he started towards the door, but Gambit stopped him.
"Guess what your loving daddy is making you do." He drawled dangerously.
"Buy candy and eat it?"
"No."
"Decide between a puppy and a kitty?"
"No."
"Float on marshm-"
"NO!! He's making you go to school!"
"What?! This is so unfair! Everyone is against me! I'm running away!" And he did, he ran out of the room, down the hall, and into his room, but that's as far as he got. He ran into the wall on the other side of his room due to brake damage and fell to the floor, unconcious.
"Not a bad idea from the albino." Colossus nodded, "Except for the part where he knocked himself out."
"Well, I don't think Magneto will start school just yet. He'll need time to plan first. Pack your bags tonight with only things you'll absolutely need, and we'll meet here and sneak out tomorrow morning at 5." The other two nodded. "Remember. Five o'clock sharp. Here. Only one bag. Only the absolute necessities. Oh, and don't tell Magneto."
With that, they all departed their separate ways to get ready for the great escape. Gambit hoped they would listen to him and be extra careful not to let Magneto know. If he knew, they would never escape.
The dinner bell rang all throughout the newly dubbed Magneto's School of Wonders for Criminally Stupid Lackeys. They all trooped to the dinner hall where, to their horror, they were served green beans by walking metal spatulas.
"Eeeeeew. Green beans are icky!" Pyro exclaimed.
"Eat your vegetables, young man!" Magneto chastized him.
"Nu uh!"
"NOW!" Pyro shoved them all in at once and smiled at Magneto. Magneto began serving himself, muttering about insolent brats.
Colossus was trying to solve a tough problem at the other end of the table. He was looking at three plates that sat before him. One held green beans, one held spinach, and one held an unrecognizable brown substance. "Let's see…" he whispered, "Nast, bleck, or grody? Which is least bad?" He finally settled on the unrecognizable brown substance.
Quicksilver said he didn't like what they were having for dinner, so Magneto made him two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. "More food for a growing boy!" He said as he sat them down in front of Quicksilver, "Eat up!"
Sabertooth was present only because Magneto was big on family dinners. Everyone had to be there. When they all complained about the rank smell, his excuse was Sabertooth's sparkling conversation. He didn't eat anything, though. Later that night he would go out and kill a couple of rabbits or something and eat them.
Gambit just sat quietly, as usual, and ate his 'food' without complaining. He was deep in his thoughts thinking about where they could go. The X-Men Headquarters was definitely out of the question. They all had to go to school, and even if they didn't, Pyro couldn't get along. There was just something about using his powers to help people and restraining them for only that that got to him. The Brotherhood was also out. He couldn't stand those pigs. They were stupid, and they smelled like Sabertooth. He could probably go live with them. The other reason was Mystique. Gambit shuddered. She had the worst personality, and he voice was annoying as hell. Dyke. Slut. Haha. That left the sewers. Even though the Morlocks were ugly as sin, they were nice enough people. A little reclusive though. Hopefully, they would take them in.
"So, minions. I expect Gambit has told the rest of you about the wonderful new adventure we are embarking on?" Magneto smiled at his little 'family'. They stared blankly at him except for Gambit, who nodded at Magneto and continued eating, and Pyro, who had never stopped eating or made any sign he'd heard at all. Magneto rolled his eyes and sighed. "School. Has Gambit told you that we're going to be having school?"
A collective murmur of "Oooh"s and "Yeah"s went through the room as they all nodded at each other and Magneto except for Gambit, who just nodded once at Magneto and went back to eating, and Pyro, who never looked up from his plate or quit shoveling food in his mouth for one consecutive second.
Dinner commenced with conversation much like the above, but, unfortunately, all good things must come to an end. They all proceeded back to their rooms. Sabertooth snuck out his window to go hunting, and Gambit, Pyro, and Colossus began their packing. Gambit packed all the necessities: a change of clothes, some money, soap, et cetera. Colossus packed oil to keep his shield from squeaking. He didn't intend to wear clothes if he could help it. After all, why wear clothes when you had metal-wear? Pyro spent three hours packing and repacking his flame throwers and a small refrigerator filled with those little cubes of cheddar cheese until he got them to fit just right . Finally, they all went to bed so they could start out fresh and cheerful in the morning.
A/N: Chapter two. Four reviews already! Weee! Even though one was from Kayli, that's still good. Thanks to Amanda, Etwa, and Window Girl (all of which were not signed reviews, so I don't know what their real names are.) I'm going to assume Window Girl is Teara, who gave me the idea. Special thanks to her! Btw: Teara said it was okay to give you all her AOL sn. You all get to share the wonders of talking to her now! Yay! It is tearraspades. REVIEW!!
