When Harry and Draco got to the man's house they spent an absurdly boring fifteen minutes sitting in his parlor. Finally Draco said, "Well?"
"What?" asked the man with the unfortunate hair.
"I believe you promised us tea and biscuits."
"So I did…umm…let me just go to the kitchen and get those." The man turned around and began to walk towards the kitchen, giving a frightening look at the back of his poorly combed head but when he was about half way there he jumped around to face the boys, whipping out his wand. "Sleepticus!" yelled the man and Harry and Draco promptly slipped into unconsciousness.
Several hours later, Draco woke up in a bed and saw that Harry was asleep next to him. He began to look around the room and soon noticed that his and Harry's clothes were neatly folded across a chair a few feet away. Beginning to panic, Draco quickly checked to see if he was naked. He found that he was indeed. Then he found that Harry was naked as well. This made him very depressed, as he had no idea what had happened, "Oh, cripes," he muttered.
He sat in bed for about ten minutes, trying not to hyperventilate, he was so occupied with this that he failed to notice Harry's eyes open. Harry, looking around, came to many of the same conclusions Draco had upon waking. This, however, had a very different effect on him than it did on his blonde bedfellow. You see, each person in the bed thought that the other knew why they were there and, though this was not true, it made Harry happy and Draco very, very sad.
"What happened?" they both asked at exactly the same time, Draco's voice all high pitched and panicky and Harry's smooth and happy, yet curious. He felt a vague disappointment at not being able to remember anything they did.
Draco, seeing that Harry was lost in his imagination, decided to begin speculation, "I don't know how you managed to get me here but obviously it was some sort of spell, I don't appreciate this at all."
"What? I'm just as curious as you are about how I got here, although I'm rather appreciative."
Draco sat there, glaring at Harry for a moment and was about to say something when the man who had brought them to his house walked in, "Hello boys," he said, "I'm glad to see you're awake. Do you remember anything of the last few hours?"
"No, we don't." said Draco, icily.
"Well, the three of us had lots of fun."
Harry noticed the look on Draco's face and the horrified silence that followed the man's comment and he knew that, unless the man had the skin of a rhinoceros, he would soon be weeping.
And he was right, Draco took a deep breath and said in a chillingly calm voice, "Who are you? And what do you think your doing? My father will absolutely have you killed when he finds out about this, he done worse to others who've crossed me. But let's forget about that for a moment, I can hardly think straight when confronted with those terrible robes. Where did you find them, the dumpster behind a monster truck rally? Although, your robes are positively forgivable when one sees your hair. You look like Medusa after an encounter with a particularly vindictive hairdresser. You look like Hermione Granger crossed with an uncombed poodle. If only hillbillies who use bowls to get their fabulous hairstyles could see you, they would laugh themselves to death. I feel so depressed just looking at you, I'm nostalgic for five minutes ago when I thought Potter had gotten me drunk and seduced me. To think that I was touched by those callused hands, they don't even look clean…Oh God! The germs! You must be covered with germs!" Draco was quickly loosing his composure, "Of course you are, you peasant! You obviously would see no reason to wash yourself! Oh Christ, where's a bathroom I need to wash…wait! I can't go near your bathroom, it's probably crawling with microscopic organisms of every species so that no cleanser could get rid of them all! Where's my wand? Potter, get me out of here! I need to go home and wash!" finally he seemed to be out of things to say and instead started thrashing around on the bed, obviously trying not to touch anything.
As Harry had predicted, the man with the amusing lack of hygiene was in tears by this time. The green-eyed teenager sat watching the poorly coifed man cry and Draco thrash around for several moments with a certain amount of amusement. Finally the man wiped away the last of his tears and pointed his wand at Draco, "Tieupticus!" he yelled and Draco was immediately fastened to the bed, much to his dismay.
"Gaa! There's no escape from the germs now!" he cried, trying to move but bound by magical ropes, that are actually no different from regular ones except that they tie themselves.
The man whose hairdresser was obviously a deranged sociopath began to exit the room. Having eyes, Draco noticed this and said, "Thank the Lord you're leaving!" then he looked uneasily at Harry and said, "Wait, I take it back! Don't leave me in here with Potter and his raging hormones."
