(Next day! Wheeeee!)

Lance: Hey guys, what are you watching?

Koga: (snickering) Some dude called Ash Ketchup on TV.

Will: (grinning sneakily) Don't you know anything, Koga? You got his name wrong.

Koga: (similar grin) I did?

Will: Yeah. It's Bash Ketchup!

(Will and Koga high-five each other)

Lance: Ugh… Ash Ketchum, right?

Bruno: He's not so bad…

Koga: He's a dweeb!

Will: Ditto.

Bruno: I disagree!

Will and Koga: Oh YEAH?

(and thus The Trial Of Ash Ketchum began! Muahahahahahaha.)

~SOME TIME LATER~

Bruno: (dressed in judge robes, and carrying a mallet. He is sitting in the judge stand) Hello, people of the jury. We are here today to (points to Ash, who is in the defendant's spot) Sort out who Ash Ketchum REALLY is!

(murmured comments from the jury, who just happen to be the authors and Gym Leaders)

Bruno: And welcome our accusers… Will and Koga!

Koga: HIIIIIII EVERYBODYYYYY!!!!!! (waves extremely enthusiastically to the audience)

Will: Yo.

Bruno: Eh-heh… Anyway, Ash Ketchum's lawyer is Karen!

Karen: (comes out, grinning at everyone, and waving) Hiya!

Bruno: And our punisher-guy person, Lance!

Lance: (points to his Dragonites, which are savagely ripping up human skeletons in the dungeons) That is the torturing room!

Ash: I must be dreaming. (blinks) Waaaa! I'm scared!

Koga: Shut thy mouth, foolish inferior one!

Ash: (immediately shuts up)

Bruno: Anyway, to begin the trial, let's have some opinions. I call Corrector9Yui to the witness stand or whatever its called!

(Corrector9Yui glares at Bruno menacingly, does the same with Koga, then sits at the witness thing)

Corrector9Yui: (stands up) (clears throat) (opens mouth wide) No comment. (sits back down)

Bruno: Errr… Thank you, Yui… You may return to your seat.

(Corrector9Yui runs back to her stand)

Bruno: Next… I call up Lccorp2!

Lccorp2: (laughs evilly, and runs down to the witness stand)

Bruno: So, Lccorp2, what are your opinions on Ash Ketchum?

Lccorp2: He's a L-O-O-S-E-R! He's stupid, stupid, stupid, but that's not all because he's also stupid, and he's stupid, and stupid, and-

Bruno: Errr… Any other comments?

Lccorp2: Yeah. He's stupid.

Bruno: So… You think he should be punished?

Lccorp2: On a scale of one to ten? Ten billion.

Bruno: Err… Thank you… Return to your seat.

(Lccorp2 returns to his seat, cackling evilly)

Bruno: Next, one of TCL's friends from the SSBM section, M2 the Mewtwo Guru!

All: Huh?

(M2 walks up behind the stand)

Bruno: So, M2, what are your opi-

M2: Ash is stupid. I hate him. He tried to PUNCH a superclone Pokemon! How dense can you be? By the way, is Mewtwo here?

Will: Aye, no.

M2: Dangit.

Bruno: Thank you, M-

M2: I'm not done yet!

Bruno: Return to your seat.

M2: But-

Bruno: NOW!

M2: Grrrr! (sends a Shadow Ball at him)

Bruno: eeee! (hides under his stand)

M2: (floats off, muttering)

Bruno: oookaayy… Next is Shadow-I LUV Ash Ketchum! Hmmm… I think I know who she's siding with.

(Someone who looks strangely like Misty comes from the audience, waving, then stands behind her stand)

Bruno: So what are you-

Shadow-ILAK: I love 'im! Don't you dare hurt him, you meanie-heads! I LOVE ASH! I LOVE ASH! Don't you DO ANYTHING to him or I'll-

(an hour later)

Shadow-ILAK: Did I mention I LOVE ASH?

Bruno: Yes. Fifty-two thousand four hundred and ninety two times.

Will: No, Bruno!

Bruno: Eh?

Will: (smartly) It was fifty-two thousand four hundred and ninety three times.

Bruno: UGH! THY BRAIN IS ACHING! (rubs temples)

Will: Hehe.

Bruno: Back to the trial. Now we have the last author, TCL!

TCL: (walks to stage) (takes place behind stand) Thank yo very much..

Bruno: Well, TCL, what do you-

TCL: I take neither side. Half of my friends hate Ash's guts, and the other half could love him to pieces. Wanting to disappoint neither side, I take no opinions. Thank you and good day. By the way, does anyone have any cookies?

Bruno: (tosses her a cookie)

TCL: Thanks. (eats it) (stares) (glances up slowly at Bruno) Bruno… just… (is puzzled)

Bruno: Hmm?

TCL: Bruno, I'm supposed to hate you, and you're supposed to return the favor. But thanks for the cookie. I want another one.

Bruno: Argh.

Will: (annoyed) TCL, why don't you just go away now?

TCL: How rude! And you're my favorite character, too! (glares) Besides Karen, of course…

Will: (pouting) But it's not fair! You bash me more than Karen!

TCL: I bash everyone. Unintentionally of course, but it's just the way my brain works.

Will: (still pouting)

TCL: Ergg… Fine.

(An iron weight falls on Karen)

TCL: happy now?

Will: …..

TCL: Well?

Will: …..

TCL: Will? (waves a hand/wing in front of his face)

Will: Uh… You didn't have to do THAT…

TCL: eh?

Will: …Never mind.

TCL: Weird… Anyway, what is the jury's opinions? Quickly now!

Bruno: Hey! TCL, I'm running the shooowww! (pouts)

TCL: Stop that. (grabs judge's mallet out of his hand and bashes him with it)

(Jury writes down their opinions)

Falkner: Spare Ash. Me no like violence. (nods)

Bugsy: Ditto.

Whitney: Ash? Hmmm… Let 'im live.

Morty: Same thing.

Jasmine: I don't like violence, so…

Chuck: KILL HIM!!!! Eheheheheh…

Pryce: (chanting) DIE ASH DIE! DIE ASH DIE! DIE ASH DIE!

Clair: Errr… Yeah. Die.

Brock: NO! NOT ASH!!!!

Misty: (who looks strangely like S-ILAK) DON'T HURT ASH!

Lt. Surge: KILL THE WHIMP AND HIS BABY POKEMON!

Pikachu: Pika pi pi! ka chu chu! {I'm no baby! That's Pichu!}(zaps Lt. Surge)

Lt. Surge: That felt GOOD!

Pikachu: (sulks)

Erika: He's the guy who hated perfume? Oh, he should go… oh how he should go…

Janine: Spare him. No, kill him. No spare him. No, kill him. No… opinion. No opinion, yeah.

Sabrina: He gave me the Haunter… But kill him anyway. I'm EEEE-VIL.

Blaine: Yeah! DIE!

Blue: MY RIVAL IS RED! RED LOOKS LIKE ASH! SO KILL ASH!

(after all opinions are said)

Bruno: Since the author is too lazy to count the votes, we'll just have Ash live, to appease certain Ash-loving authors…

Ash: (running off trial) (has tears in his eyes) I live to see the daylight…! (dances)

TCL: (to Sonicrazy91) Hey, yo.

Sonicrazy91: Eh?

TCL: You is a Celebi, right? A BLUE Celebi. Your full name is Sonicrazy91 the Blue Celebi, right?

Sonicrazy91: Yeah…

TCL: Well, forward time. To the next chapter!

Sonicrazy91: Um… Ok.

(Sonicrazy forwards time. Zzziiing! Other sound FX! Too lazy to write me own!)

~ZZIIIIIIIIIIIINGGGGGGGGG…~

A/N: That… was… weird… and a bit brutal, I guess. It didn't have much Lance, and I apologize, he just didn't get a major role. ^_^