Sasami: Well…I'm not sure about this one here. *^^ This particular one-shot is the result of reading Edmondia Dantes's work at 1:00 in the morning. I like it anyway. It's just a bit different than the rest of my stories. I swear it's all mine! My yami had nothing to do with it.
Nijuu: It's true…o.O
Sasami: I refuse to state the disclaimer! You all know that it isn't mine!!!! The story, if you can call this a story, is though.
Yaoi Warning: This story contains quite a bit of yaoi…Hell, the whole thing is shounen-ai at the very least. If you don't like it…Then do not read it. Or, read it anyway…you may find that it's not as bad as you thought…*^^
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Sins of a ShadowBy Anime Girl Sasami
My precious aibou. My flawless reflection. So pure. So gentle. They all think you to be so naïve, so innocent. It was true once, was it not? Before you met me, before you inhaled the corrupted air I breathe. You poured away your precious innocence into this demon, so I could be whole. So we would both be whole. You drowned yourself in me, and I did nothing to stop it.
I tainted you.
Can you fault me hikari? Aibou? Can you pass judgment upon me, your own darkness? We both wanted it. Craved it. Needed it.
I still get lost in your eyes. Those bottomless amethyst seas of yours. They consume me. I can see your soul through them. Not that you denied me from it before. Your soul…it's still so bright, underneath all of my darkness. How are you not oppressed by my shadow?
You astound me.
How can you be real? How can you even exist, still so perfect after all I have done to you. After all we do. Your life flows through me even now. So pure next to my own. So incredibly beautiful. It's true. I could never make you believe it though. Never.
Everything about you is so perfect. You tell me that you are nothing compared to me. You are wrong aibou. You are everything. Those brilliant eyes of yours that still appear so faultless, they hide the poison I have breathed into you. Alabaster and white as snow. Such warmth comes from your winter-touched skin. And your lips, they offer so much passion. Passion that you hide so completely. Is that the warmth that burns within you?
Forgive me my aibou.
When you wrapped your arms around me, how could I not take what you offered? And when you looked at me with those shy eyes, and pressed your soft lips to my own…Ra, you were so gorgeous. You still are. Can you blame me hikari? Can you blame me for stealing away the innocence you offered so unreservedly? I wanted you so much. I never stopped to consider what it was you wanted.
Are you angry with me dear, dear hikari?
I fear that you are. Yes, the almighty pharaoh fears the resentment of a young man. But you mean everything to me. Everything. I would lie, cheat, steal, and kill if that would please you. I know it would not, but if it did…You still carry your childish joy, even after all these years since. But I still fear you are angered by what I stole that night. I could never ask you. It would not be appropriate.
Am I wrong aibou?
Maybe I am mistaken. You still scream my name and only mine. You always were forgiving. Have you forgiven me? Were you ever even angry with me? If you were, you hide it so well. You are so beautiful hikari.
My every waking thought is of you. My every dream is of you. I would like nothing more than to spend the rest of my eternity in your embrace. In the warmth of your bed, between those cotton sheets, it's like a piece of heaven. Those sheets always feel like silk to me, when you are in my arms, planting scorching kisses all over my face. Ever drop of sweat, every tear, every scream; they are all mine. If you wanted someone else I would never deny you your pleasure, but you would never give it to anyone else anyway. Gods, I love it when you scream my name.
I love your smile. I love the way your hand fits in mine. I love how perfectly we fit together when you lie against me. I love the way you taste, so sweet and sultry and frozen and burning and you. Only you. How you giggle when I love you in public. The way you still blush when I kiss you. How you always know just what to do, just what I need, want, crave. You and only you. The way you move. The way you talk. The way you smile against my mouth when I speak to your mind. The way you speak to my mind. The way you complete me. I love…I love…I love…I love…I love…
I love you.
I do not tell you enough. Never in all my millennia have I loved anyone like I love you. In fact, I never loved anyone until you. Hikari. Aibou. My love. Words cannot express the depth of my affection. Your body alone is not what I desire, though I do hunger after you. Your mind, your soul, your heart, and your body. I want all of you. Most of all, I want to be your everything. I want to protect you. To hold you. To love you. To make love to you. I want to be the air that you breathe as much as you are my air.
Can I be your existence?
Or have I already become it?
You are the sin only the greatest authors speak of. Will you give me my sin again*? Is it not ironic, that the light of this entire world should be so corrupted by darkness? You, the one who will save the world from shadows, are so completely consumed by one. A shadow. A sin. My sin. Aibou…
How did I live without you? How did I survive without your arms around me, and your lips on mine? I need you hikari. Aibou. I need your light, your love, your devotion, your passion. I cannot live without you. I would not live without you. Never again. You pulled me from the darkness of my soul, and purged from me my hatred. You gave me your light.
How did I fall so far?
How is it that I have fallen so far from the existence I once sought? Love is a charlatan. She pulls you away from what you thought you needed, and throws you into something you were unaware belonged to you. Never once did she warn of the consequences of falling into her arms. Never once did she tell the shadows they would taint the light. Nor did she tell the light to resist the shadows. And so, we are both consumed by her sweet intoxication. Charlatan. Courtesan. All men will pay for drinking her in.
Do not think I regret my decision dear aibou. You could never fathom how lost I was without you. Wandering through that aimless darkness for what I feared was eternity, I met that great pretender. She told me that my savior was near, that he would pull me out of the abyss darker than myself. She was right. But she failed to warn me that you were a fragile soul, did not tell me that I must treat you with care. Never mentioned how much I would need you. How much I would love you.
And I do love you so.
Will you kiss me again? I love to feel your arms around my neck and your delicate hands in my hair. I fear you might break under my touch, so will you kiss me again? I love it when you show me affection, when you take some control. All I do is demand from you. Forgive me. I love to see you take what you want from me, stealing my breath away so suddenly. When you snuggle close to me without reservation in public, or when you kiss me for no reason at all.
Perhaps I have become more like you than I once thought.
Maybe your innocence has not disappeared entirely. For once in my life, perhaps I breathe that innocence, that which was once yours. I stole it from you, or perhaps you gave it to me. You drink my poison voluntarily. Did you give away your innocence for me to drink in return?
Thank you my love.
Stay with me dear hikari. Please. The sun never looks so sweet as it does when it shines on you through the curtains in the early hours of the morning. I want to spend the rest of eternity waking to you basked in the light of the dawn. Smile for me aibou. Please. Light up my life with that breathtaking brilliance that shines from within you when you smile. Let me be your one and only. Please. Let me stay beside you for eternity, with my arms wrapped around you in protection.
I ask these things unselfishly. Aibou, I offer to you anything you would ask for. I would hold you until the stars fell from the sky if you so desired. I would spend my days making love to you if you craved it. Ask and you shall receive hikari**. I would give you the world if you wanted.
My purpose. My desire. My love. My aibou. Myself. How could I do anything but love you with my heart and soul. Take my heart if you feel you have not already done so. I am always beside you, within you. You can feel it as well, can't you? Go on about your day, if you want me beside your side for the extent of it, I will be. Otherwise, I will be here at the end of your day, to hold you. To love you. To listen to your troubles, and kiss away your pain.
I love you hikari.
Forever.
Forever is a long time aibou, like trying to sweep away Mount Everest with a handkerchief. Will you spend it with me anyway?
/Gladly./
~*Owari*~
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Sasami: And there you have it, my nice little one-shot romance thing. *sigh* I really did enjoy writing that. Let's see some reviews now. Pretty please!!!
Nijuu: If you read it then please leave a review…one word will do. Really, it will. o.O
Sasami: I really must give credit to Edmondia Dantes-sensei for the idea. I was up soooo late last night reading her fan fiction, and this just kind of came to me. Arigatou gozaimasu Edmondia-sensei!
*From Romeo and Juliet, just put in slightly different words…barely different at all in fact
**Abridged from the bible…again sort of. It's almost the exact passage, except seeing how I don't remember where in the bible it is, I couldn't quote it verbatim. *^^
