Shhh...I'm writing this at school. Looks around suspiciously, supposed to be typing science report. But what Ms. Wade does not know does not hurt her or me...Anyways sorry for taking uh along time to type I hope you guys are still reading my fic. Guess What I bought! My very own Squall and Seifer! Tee-hee!
Squall-Chan: Since D.A. over here's to busy actin' like a moron we'll do the rest.
Seifer-Chan: She doesn't own FFVIII. I mean seriously look at her. *Watches as Noa stares off into space* My point proven. And don't sue. She can't even pay her library fine, less than a law suite.
"Vacation...Hell"
By: Renegade 'Noa (Yes I changed my pen name!)
Chapter Six: Hockey Masks and Monkeys from Hell
***
"I'm bored!" Complained an irritated Laguna.
"I'm tired..." Squall added in, snickering a little as he smirked at the still fuming Seifer Almasy.
"Shut the fuck up Leonhart...Stupid Woman making me leave my gunblade at the Garden..." Seifer complained as he scratched his head, as they continued walking through the dark forest.
Irvine, well Irvine was being dragged by Zell.
Why is he being dragged you ask?
Well let's just say, he's out cold and was nice and plump.
Why?
Well since Irvine was hungry he decided to eat some berries, the problem was there were two kinds, one poisonous, one not.
So Mr. Know-it-all-Zell referring back to his boy scouts days, told the hungry Irvine that these nice black berries were the poisoned ones.
Obviously not trusting the blonde man, Irvine ate the red ones.
He ate about six of them till the poor boy fell to the ground, out like a light and nice and pink.
Heh, what are the odds of Zell being right?
Oh well, at least he stopped complaining about missing Selphie.
The wind suddenly picked up, as the tress rumbled closer together, moving to the beat of the hard gust of wind.
Thunder clapped loudly, hitting a tree a few feet away from the group.
As the bright light went away, Squall looked around.
"Hey where'd everybody go?" He questioned looking around for the others.
"SON! HELP! I'M STUCK IN A TREE AND I CAN'T GET DOWN!!!!!" A voice yelled from above.
Squall raised his head up toward the voice.
There was Laguna; arms and legs clung to a tree branch tightly.
"Laguna! What in the hell are you doing in a tree?" He questioned.
Laguna shrugged his shoulders, not letting go of his death grip on the tree.
Suddenly a light buzzing of what seemed like a saw was heard in the background.
Squall's eyes searched the dark forest.
Suddenly a figure jumped through the bushes.
"OH SHIT!"
Squall stared at the blur, as it ran past him.
"Zell?!" Squall questioned.
"Dude! Did you hear that? It sounded like a chain saw!"
Squall stared at him.
"A What?" He asked the frightened blonde.
"A fuckin' chainsaw man! Like the one JASON HAD! *SQUEAL!*"
Squall backed away slowly from Zell.
"What?" Zell questioned the pale Squall.
"HELLO! I'M STILL STUCK IN A TREE IF YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED!" Laguna yelled from above.
"J-J-J-JA-JA-JA--JA!" Squall stuttered.
"Ja?" Zell questioned, scratching the back of his head.
"HOLY COW! ZELL THERE'S SOMETHING BEHIND YOU!!" Laguna yelled from the tree branch he was STILL clinging to.
Zell paled, as his eyes widened.
"J-JA-JAJA-JAJA-JA-J..."Squall still mindlessly stuttered.
Zell placed his hands over his eyes, as he slowly begun to turn around.
"YOU'RE A BRAVE LITTLE GOTH KID! I'LL REMEMBER TO WRITE IT ON YOUR GRAVE!" Yelled a sarcastic Laguna.
"Yah thanks...I think..." Zell replied, as he was now fully faced in front of the shadowy figure.
Zell slowly uncovered his eyes to find...
"OH SHIT!!!!!!!"
"Trick or treat."
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Zell screamed at the sight in front of him.
There stood Jason in all his glory. Blue jean over-alls, chainsaw, and the unmistakable white hockey mask.
"Chicken Wuss! You know I can hear-OH SHIT!!!!!!!! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!!" Seifer screamed as he pulled his way through the thick growth of plants.
"HEY YOU GUYS! AIN'T THAT IRVINE'S COWBOY HAT ON THE END OF HIS CHAINSAW?!" Laguna questioned.
"Ja-jaja-jaja-ja-J-JJJ-JA..." Squall muttered, his mouth wide open.
"Ja..." And with that Zell's eyes rolled up into his head, as he hit the forest floor.
Seifer stared at the horrible site, as he whispers to the still gawking Squall.
"On the count of three, you grab Zell and we'll make a run for it."
Squall finally stopped acting like a moron and nodded his head.
Then it hit him, "What about Laguna?"
Seifer's eyebrows raised.
"This is the last question I'd expect from you."
Squall growled, "Well he's sorta the president of Esthar we sorta can't just let him die."
"True, True...But how the hell are we-," Seifer's sentence was cut off as he ducked down to keep his head as Jason swung his chainsaw. "-Gonna do that? He's stuck in a tree and we're running out of time!"
Squall's eyes roamed the ground frequently searching for a solution.
His eyes stopped on a silver can sticking out of Zell's coat.
Pepper Spray...
"That's it!" Squall shouted.
"What?" Seifer questioned as he ducked again.
Squall smirked as his rival as he sprinted toward his fallen comrade.
"What in Sam Hell are you doing Leonhart?! Have you lost your fuckin' mind?!" Seifer screamed as Squall reached into Zell's coat pocket and pulled out the silver bottle.
Seifer glade in annoyance as Squall sprayed Jason's face full of the shit until the serial killer passed out, in a big heap on the forest floor.
"Leonhart, you really get on my nerves...You always , ALWAYS have to save the day, don't you?" Seifer complained, his voice plentiful with venom.
Squall only gave him a pride filled smile.
Oh how he hated Leonhart...
"HEY! AUGH! I'M 'STILL' STUCK IN A TREE! UH HEEELLLOOO?!" Laguna shouted.
"Hey a monkey!" Laguna stated as he saw a monkey climb onto the limb next to him.
Seifer and Squall raised their heads to the sky, to stare at the goofball president.
Laguna's eyes filled with glee as he stared at the little tan monkey.
"Awww, He's sucha cute lill' monkey...OW!" Laguna stated as the so-called 'Cute Lil' Monkey' through an acorn at his head.
"Hn. I think I could get to like that monkey..." Squall stated as the lil' monkey attacked Laguna viciously.
Ignoring the president's screams of pain and calls for help, the duo headed over to the limp serial killer.
Seifer picked up Irvine's cowboy hat and placed it atop his own head, as Squall went over to pick up Zell.
"Look at me! I'm Irvine!" Seifer stated as he waltzed around the forest floor. He stooped at a tree.
"Well Hello, foxy lady...My name is Irvine and I want you to bare my children..." He stated in a deep husky voice.
He suddenly slapped himself across his cheek.
In a high pitched voice he stated, "How dare you Irvine Kinneas! You're such a pig!"
" 'Ey now! That was cold..." A voice said as the owner of the voice appeared form the bushes.
Squall turned his head sharply to see whom it was, he sighed as he recognized the person and dropped his guard.
"Oh, It's just you..." Squall said as he went back to trying to wake the sleeping Zell.
"What do ya mean it's just me? And you," Irvine said pointing to Seifer. "Take off my Hat, I don't want any lice."
Seifer narrowed his eyes, pointing toward himself, than holding out his hands in a chocking matter, and finally pointing toward Irvine.
" Yah, yah you'll choke me, I know..." Irvine said as he slumped to the ground with a sigh.
"I miss Selphie..." He stated as he stared at his feet.
A body suddenly landed in between them all with a monkey chewing on what looks like an arm.
"What the hell is that?!" Irvine shouted as he stared at the bloody, and yet humorous sight in front of him.
"Laguna..." Squall muttered.
Irvine raised his head, "Oh...Okay..."
And they sat in silence, as they watched the tan little monkey gnaw on Laguna, an no one moved to stop him.
They like there fingers and limbs where they were.
To Be Continued
_____________________________________________________________________________________
A/N- Sorry it took so long to post it, but I saved it on a computer at school and I had to wait for the chance to save it on a floppy disk!
Squall-Chan- And so this concludes a Chapter we shall never forget.
Seifer-Chan- And will always be reminded of when we take a look at Laguna...Man have you seen him, He looks like something that came out of the Mummy or something!
Noa-Chan- *At the mention of The Mummy* Hmm...Brandon Frasier...can u say STUD!
Squall-Chan- *Growls evilly at Noa-Chan's parents* Damn you for buying her that cursed DVD!
Seifer-Chan- See you next time for another Chapter (Hopefully SOON) Of Vacation Hell!
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Ja ne, Renegade Noa
P.S.- Please review, and if you have any good ideas for any chapters, please tell me! Please!
;P Thanx
Squall-Chan: Since D.A. over here's to busy actin' like a moron we'll do the rest.
Seifer-Chan: She doesn't own FFVIII. I mean seriously look at her. *Watches as Noa stares off into space* My point proven. And don't sue. She can't even pay her library fine, less than a law suite.
"Vacation...Hell"
By: Renegade 'Noa (Yes I changed my pen name!)
Chapter Six: Hockey Masks and Monkeys from Hell
***
"I'm bored!" Complained an irritated Laguna.
"I'm tired..." Squall added in, snickering a little as he smirked at the still fuming Seifer Almasy.
"Shut the fuck up Leonhart...Stupid Woman making me leave my gunblade at the Garden..." Seifer complained as he scratched his head, as they continued walking through the dark forest.
Irvine, well Irvine was being dragged by Zell.
Why is he being dragged you ask?
Well let's just say, he's out cold and was nice and plump.
Why?
Well since Irvine was hungry he decided to eat some berries, the problem was there were two kinds, one poisonous, one not.
So Mr. Know-it-all-Zell referring back to his boy scouts days, told the hungry Irvine that these nice black berries were the poisoned ones.
Obviously not trusting the blonde man, Irvine ate the red ones.
He ate about six of them till the poor boy fell to the ground, out like a light and nice and pink.
Heh, what are the odds of Zell being right?
Oh well, at least he stopped complaining about missing Selphie.
The wind suddenly picked up, as the tress rumbled closer together, moving to the beat of the hard gust of wind.
Thunder clapped loudly, hitting a tree a few feet away from the group.
As the bright light went away, Squall looked around.
"Hey where'd everybody go?" He questioned looking around for the others.
"SON! HELP! I'M STUCK IN A TREE AND I CAN'T GET DOWN!!!!!" A voice yelled from above.
Squall raised his head up toward the voice.
There was Laguna; arms and legs clung to a tree branch tightly.
"Laguna! What in the hell are you doing in a tree?" He questioned.
Laguna shrugged his shoulders, not letting go of his death grip on the tree.
Suddenly a light buzzing of what seemed like a saw was heard in the background.
Squall's eyes searched the dark forest.
Suddenly a figure jumped through the bushes.
"OH SHIT!"
Squall stared at the blur, as it ran past him.
"Zell?!" Squall questioned.
"Dude! Did you hear that? It sounded like a chain saw!"
Squall stared at him.
"A What?" He asked the frightened blonde.
"A fuckin' chainsaw man! Like the one JASON HAD! *SQUEAL!*"
Squall backed away slowly from Zell.
"What?" Zell questioned the pale Squall.
"HELLO! I'M STILL STUCK IN A TREE IF YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED!" Laguna yelled from above.
"J-J-J-JA-JA-JA--JA!" Squall stuttered.
"Ja?" Zell questioned, scratching the back of his head.
"HOLY COW! ZELL THERE'S SOMETHING BEHIND YOU!!" Laguna yelled from the tree branch he was STILL clinging to.
Zell paled, as his eyes widened.
"J-JA-JAJA-JAJA-JA-J..."Squall still mindlessly stuttered.
Zell placed his hands over his eyes, as he slowly begun to turn around.
"YOU'RE A BRAVE LITTLE GOTH KID! I'LL REMEMBER TO WRITE IT ON YOUR GRAVE!" Yelled a sarcastic Laguna.
"Yah thanks...I think..." Zell replied, as he was now fully faced in front of the shadowy figure.
Zell slowly uncovered his eyes to find...
"OH SHIT!!!!!!!"
"Trick or treat."
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Zell screamed at the sight in front of him.
There stood Jason in all his glory. Blue jean over-alls, chainsaw, and the unmistakable white hockey mask.
"Chicken Wuss! You know I can hear-OH SHIT!!!!!!!! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!!" Seifer screamed as he pulled his way through the thick growth of plants.
"HEY YOU GUYS! AIN'T THAT IRVINE'S COWBOY HAT ON THE END OF HIS CHAINSAW?!" Laguna questioned.
"Ja-jaja-jaja-ja-J-JJJ-JA..." Squall muttered, his mouth wide open.
"Ja..." And with that Zell's eyes rolled up into his head, as he hit the forest floor.
Seifer stared at the horrible site, as he whispers to the still gawking Squall.
"On the count of three, you grab Zell and we'll make a run for it."
Squall finally stopped acting like a moron and nodded his head.
Then it hit him, "What about Laguna?"
Seifer's eyebrows raised.
"This is the last question I'd expect from you."
Squall growled, "Well he's sorta the president of Esthar we sorta can't just let him die."
"True, True...But how the hell are we-," Seifer's sentence was cut off as he ducked down to keep his head as Jason swung his chainsaw. "-Gonna do that? He's stuck in a tree and we're running out of time!"
Squall's eyes roamed the ground frequently searching for a solution.
His eyes stopped on a silver can sticking out of Zell's coat.
Pepper Spray...
"That's it!" Squall shouted.
"What?" Seifer questioned as he ducked again.
Squall smirked as his rival as he sprinted toward his fallen comrade.
"What in Sam Hell are you doing Leonhart?! Have you lost your fuckin' mind?!" Seifer screamed as Squall reached into Zell's coat pocket and pulled out the silver bottle.
Seifer glade in annoyance as Squall sprayed Jason's face full of the shit until the serial killer passed out, in a big heap on the forest floor.
"Leonhart, you really get on my nerves...You always , ALWAYS have to save the day, don't you?" Seifer complained, his voice plentiful with venom.
Squall only gave him a pride filled smile.
Oh how he hated Leonhart...
"HEY! AUGH! I'M 'STILL' STUCK IN A TREE! UH HEEELLLOOO?!" Laguna shouted.
"Hey a monkey!" Laguna stated as he saw a monkey climb onto the limb next to him.
Seifer and Squall raised their heads to the sky, to stare at the goofball president.
Laguna's eyes filled with glee as he stared at the little tan monkey.
"Awww, He's sucha cute lill' monkey...OW!" Laguna stated as the so-called 'Cute Lil' Monkey' through an acorn at his head.
"Hn. I think I could get to like that monkey..." Squall stated as the lil' monkey attacked Laguna viciously.
Ignoring the president's screams of pain and calls for help, the duo headed over to the limp serial killer.
Seifer picked up Irvine's cowboy hat and placed it atop his own head, as Squall went over to pick up Zell.
"Look at me! I'm Irvine!" Seifer stated as he waltzed around the forest floor. He stooped at a tree.
"Well Hello, foxy lady...My name is Irvine and I want you to bare my children..." He stated in a deep husky voice.
He suddenly slapped himself across his cheek.
In a high pitched voice he stated, "How dare you Irvine Kinneas! You're such a pig!"
" 'Ey now! That was cold..." A voice said as the owner of the voice appeared form the bushes.
Squall turned his head sharply to see whom it was, he sighed as he recognized the person and dropped his guard.
"Oh, It's just you..." Squall said as he went back to trying to wake the sleeping Zell.
"What do ya mean it's just me? And you," Irvine said pointing to Seifer. "Take off my Hat, I don't want any lice."
Seifer narrowed his eyes, pointing toward himself, than holding out his hands in a chocking matter, and finally pointing toward Irvine.
" Yah, yah you'll choke me, I know..." Irvine said as he slumped to the ground with a sigh.
"I miss Selphie..." He stated as he stared at his feet.
A body suddenly landed in between them all with a monkey chewing on what looks like an arm.
"What the hell is that?!" Irvine shouted as he stared at the bloody, and yet humorous sight in front of him.
"Laguna..." Squall muttered.
Irvine raised his head, "Oh...Okay..."
And they sat in silence, as they watched the tan little monkey gnaw on Laguna, an no one moved to stop him.
They like there fingers and limbs where they were.
To Be Continued
_____________________________________________________________________________________
A/N- Sorry it took so long to post it, but I saved it on a computer at school and I had to wait for the chance to save it on a floppy disk!
Squall-Chan- And so this concludes a Chapter we shall never forget.
Seifer-Chan- And will always be reminded of when we take a look at Laguna...Man have you seen him, He looks like something that came out of the Mummy or something!
Noa-Chan- *At the mention of The Mummy* Hmm...Brandon Frasier...can u say STUD!
Squall-Chan- *Growls evilly at Noa-Chan's parents* Damn you for buying her that cursed DVD!
Seifer-Chan- See you next time for another Chapter (Hopefully SOON) Of Vacation Hell!
_____________________________________________________________________________________
Ja ne, Renegade Noa
P.S.- Please review, and if you have any good ideas for any chapters, please tell me! Please!
;P Thanx
