Before Perfection
by The Great Red Dragon

Chapter 30


A roll of money, a few sandwiches wrapped in plastic, one of Riley's CD players, a pair of dark sunglasses, and a map of the Hawaiian islands: that's what went into my little red backpack that Riley had bought me. It was generous of him, although I had at first outright refused the money, arguing that there'd be little use of it for me…I couldn't, after all, just walk into a store and buy something, could I?
Riley persisted, however, and with a sad smile, I securely zipped the cash inside a well-placed pouch of the backpack.
I took some more items, but nothing worth of mention. Riley told me that Rebecca had suggested that I take a flashlight with, but I pointed that there was no need – I had my night-vision, after all.
Inside of my chest, there was a rock that seemed to be growing tentacles. I bit away all the pain that I could, and tried to busy myself with the packing, but it hurt so much that I wanted to fall over and cry the pain away. Instead, I continued to roughly stuff things into my pack, trying to block all emotion from my mind...but I should've known by now that I wouldn't be able to do that – your emotions always get the better of you, 541.
A tear fell from my eye as I sat in Riley's room and bundled everything securely into the backpack. I sniffed the rest away violently and zipped up the remaining compartments. Now that the task of packing was completely finished, I felt strangely empty.
I told myself to act mature. After all, this wasn't goodbye forever - I would keep in touch with my family, and I would be coming back, eventually...but it felt so goddamn unfair.
I thought fate had cursed me. Whenever I had achieved something good, or something that mattered to me, it was quickly replaced by something that threatened to destroy me…why was that?
I sat back and put my head into my hands, rocking back and forth, as if wanting to shake away this dreadful feeling.

"You could just stay here", my mind said.
"You could stay...it would be easier, and everybody would be happy."

"No...", I moaned aloud.
"I have to keep them safe."

"Just stay here", the voice continued.
"It's what you want, isn't it?"

"No!", I sobbed loudly and punched the backpack in frustration.

I grabbed some of my fur on my forehead and shook myself violently, as if trying to break out of an unwanted nightmare. The voice kept coming, and I couldn't shut it out. I tried to fight it, but it hurt almost as much as my heart did. I couldn't shut it out…dammit, leave me alone!

"Auron?"

At once, I sat still…and quietly looked around.
Riley stood in the doorway, looking in at me. He held a metal thermos canteen in his hand, and looked very concerned at my freakish displays; I felt like an idiot.

"Auron?", he repeated, stepping into the room.
"Are you alright?"

It was a question that left me at a decision whether to punch him out or hug him; of course I wasn't fucking alright!
But I was too pathetic to answer…was so pathetic that I couldn't even decide between the two. My mind and heart were torturing me beyond speech...so I just sat there and cried like a lost child, my face in my hands. Large, pearly tears poured forth from my eyes and fell onto the carpet. My ongoing sobs forced my lids shut, and I felt myself going red with embarrassment, so I just sat there and cried, not knowing anything else to do.
I felt Riley come over and put his arms around me securely. He held me close while I cried and whispered into my ear;
"Its okay...its okay..."

For the first time in my life, Riley's affection could not quell my sadness - it was just too much and too deep. So I stood there in his arms, and both of us waited for my waterfall to stop, without anything else to do about it.
It took a while for my supply of tears to run short. Even then, I felt the need to cry, but I couldn't anymore, so I just simply stood in Riley's embrace, and sniffed like I had the worst sinus congestion (reminds me of a song by the Scorpions – I Tried to Cry, but the Tears Wouldn't Come).
I tenderly leaned my head against Riley's shoulder, and uttered these small, insignificant post-crying sobs, as if trying to apologize for my sorry behavior.
Riley let me go, but his hands still rested on my shoulders. He looked at me with understanding eyes, but I lowered my head and tried to look away.

"Feel any better?", he asked me softly.

I sniffed again and shook my head honestly.
Riley sighed and gave me a small, honest smile.

"This is hurting me as much as it's hurting you", he said, and squeezed my shoulders affectionately.

I nodded, and continued to stare at the floor; I didn't really understand, but I also didn't want to say so.

"But I understand why you're doing this…", Riley continued, trailing off a bit before going on;
"…and I think it's very brave and noble."

I looked up in surprise.

"Really?", I asked him quietly.

He nodded, and his smile widened slightly.

"Yes, I do", he said.
"You're doing this for us, and I admire your courage. Y'know, not very many people would do something like this in the goodwill of others; honestly."

"I know", I whispered gloomily, sinking a bit more and hanging my head; why did I have to break the mold?
"I know..."

Riley looked down thoughtfully, and then looked back up at me with. His face was serious, but not in the sense that something bad was about to happen.

"It's your decision", he said, and he did so in a way that didn't further pressure me.
"And I'm sorry about how I acted last night. It was stupid and inconsiderate of me...but now, I'll support you whichever way you choose."

Again, the tempting, painful voices filled my head, and I tried to block them out.

"I...I want to do what's right", I said desperately.
"But I don't know what's right...I don't know what to do!"

Riley took my hand in his and held it tight.

"What I suggest", he said.
"Is that you try to block what's up here...(he indicated at my head)…and listen to what's going on in here."

He placed my hand over my chest and over my heart, and then rested his hand over mine.
I nodded and my eyes fell shut. With some effort, managed to shut out the poisoned voices and I concentrated, and listened for something that could guide me rightfully.
But there was nothing. No magical voice telling me the right answers, and no guiding light to show me the right path.
At first, I was confused…if I couldn't hear or see the answer, how was I to find it?
I opened my eyes in frustration, ready to tell Riley that I still didn't know...but when I opened my eyes and looked upon him, I found that the answer that I had been searching for…it had been in front of me all the time.

Riley.

The person I cared for the most in the entire universe was right before me, holding my hand tightly. He loved me as much as I loved him. He had shown me the light when all darkness fell, and had shown me right from wrong. He was all I cared about in the entire universe. He was my savior, the one who had found me and given me all I had...it was all about him. How stupid was I not to have realized it before? It was clear to me, now – I didn't matter. My existence wasn't relevant when Riley's was considered; only he mattered.
Realizing this brought forth an entirely different set of emotions within myself. I still felt very cold, but no longer confused or unsure. It was as if this realization on its own has chased away or blocked the dreaded feelings of temptation. Now, my head was clear, and I could think straight…and the answer came to me very quickly.
I looked Riley in the eyes, and told him quietly, yet determinedly;
"...I...I want to keep you safe…"

Inside my mind, a second voice spoke, and it wasn't tempting or alluring in anyway…it was an honest voice, and simply spoke to reforce my decision;
"So do it..."

I nodded in reply to the urging; I finally understood myself.

"I'm going."

At once, tears rushed up behind my eyes, but I held them back resolutely. I swallowed heavily, and nodded once more.

"I'm going."

Riley's face showed a smile yet again, and he nodded as well. He squeezed my hand, and I knew that he'd be true to his word in support of me.

"Okay", he said.

"Okay", I repeated.

Out in the hallway, I could hear Rebecca crying, and Lara doing her best to comfort her. Doctor Hartrum had been informed that I was leaving, and was going to be here to see me off.
I smiled a grim smile to myself, for I knew then...that it was time.


We drove out to a desolate little cove, some distance away from the city, where we could have a decent farewell that was free of prying eyes. I was pointed east, to move across the island before deciding where to go next.
I remember the scene vividly - Doc Hartrum was standing there, looking very nervous, as if he had done something to bring upon my departure. Next to him was Lara, with an unsure look upon her face; I don't think she understood the situation at all (which was good; she didn't need to remember the Predator). Clinging to her leg was Rebecca, who was looking at me through teary eyes. Her soft, scared gaze was enough to break my heart in two…and I actually found myself avoiding her gaze.
Finally there was Riley, who stood with his hands behind his back. I had seen him take something out of the trunk just a while earlier, and I figured whatever he took out was what he was holding…but I didn't have a clue what it could be.
I stood facing the line, with the small, red backpack over my shoulder. I'll admit that my eyes weren't one hundred percent dry, but I was managing to keep from crying.

"So...", I began slowly and unsurely.
"I guess this is goodbye."

I heard Rebecca sob softly, and she buried her face in Lara's leg.
I turned to Dr. Hartrum, and showed him a smile.

"Thanks for everything", I said to him respectfully.

"Me?", he asked in surprise, perking up.
"Why, what do you mean?"

"Thank you for fixing me up...again and again", I explained with a smile.

"Oh, that!", the doctor said, waving his hand.
"It was nothing!...a friend of Riley's is a friend of mine."

I chuckled good-naturedly and held out my hand;
"I'm glad for that. I wouldn't be alive today if it wasn't for you."

He returned the gesture, and for the first time, I think I was looked upon as an equal by the doctor, and not just a pet. Believe it or not, I really do appreciate that.
I moved on to Lara, who looked down at me.

"Sorry about the heat between us", she said, looking down, and speaking in somewhat of a mumble.
"If I knew it was today..."

I grinned at her; I knew she was showing more emotion than she was feeling, and that was what I had expected. Heck, Lara could've easily stayed home, and it wouldn't have bothered me…but now that she was here, what the Hell – why not show some emotion.

"That's okay", I said, and added on slyly;
"I never liked you anyway."

She looked surprised for a moment, then slowly smiled back, and looked me in the eyes;
"Same here."

We hit a low-five, and I was glad that I wouldn't ever have to try to get Lara to like me.
I moved my head for a peek at Rebecca, who was still hiding behind her lower sister.

"Hello?", I asked.
"Am I going to be allowed to say goodbye?"

Lara gave her a small nudge, and she came forward slowly.
We had a role-reversal from before: I tried to catch her eye, but she kept her head down.

"You okay?", I asked softly.

She raised her head ever so slightly, and spoke to me in a quiet voice, with tears in her eyes;
"I don't want you to go…"

My face dropped as she said this, and my heart kicked me in my sternum.

"I know, Rebecca", I said to her sympathetically, my sadness noticeable as well.
"But I won't be gone for long...besides, I'll write as often as I can and I'll call whenever I get the chance."

Rebecca sniffed discreetly, and I could understand her.
I'll admit, it sounded like a crappy deal, even to me.

"I still don't want you to go..."

I reached out and put my hand on her shoulder gently;
"Oh, Rebecca..."

With a free hand, I reached behind myself and into the backpack. I pulled out a small, beaded bracelet and held it out to her in my open palm.
I asked her;
"Would you at least accept a goodbye present?"

Rebecca looked down, and saw the bracelet in my hand. She took it into her hands, and looked over the many different-colored beads.

"I made it while my leg still hurt", I explained to her.
"I was going to make it for myself, but I thought that you'd like it more."

I indicated small letters printed upon the beads. Together, they read 'Rebecca & Auron - friends forever'.
She looked up at me, and I showed her a loving smile…which she returned, with tears still in her eyes.

"Can I have a hug before I go?", I asked her, holding out and extending all four arms.

She came forward, and I enveloped her small body with my arms. I felt her hugging me back, and it felt pretty good. She sniffled in my ear, but I cooed to her. I felt her strength, and somehow I knew that she was going to be alright…anybody who can endure an all-nighter of Alice Cooper's Trash tour is a force to be reckoned with, and Rebecca had even outlasted Riley.

"I love you, Auron", she whispered into my ear.

"I love you too", I whispered back, and nuzzled her tenderly.
"I promise that I'll be back soon."

I gave her a final squeeze and released her, stroking her hair once before physically parting with her, and when she stepped back towards her sister, she seemed in much better condition now (I was kinda impressed to see that our affectionate display had seemingly touched Laura, as she was wiping a few tears out of her eyes). I winked at her before moving on to Riley, who spoke before I had a chance to.

"…It hurts me to see you go", he said openly, and it sounded a bit like he had been pondering his words for some time beforehand.
"But I would feel a whole lot better if I knew you were totally tearing it up while you were away."

Again, before I could react, he beat me to the action. His hands came forth from behind his back, and I saw what he had been holding - it was his electric guitar...but he had done something with it.
The body and paddle of it had been dramatically shortened, as welll as the strings. The head seemed untouched, but on the whole, the guitar now resembled a ukulele, but it was now my size.
I was in awe, and couldn't resist to the urge to reach out and touch it. It felt smooth, and the red, wooden-cast body shone brightly in the sun's reflection. My God, how many hours of carpentry and re-mechanizing did it take to modify a full-length guitar to my size? I don't know if Riley did it by himself or if he hired someone to do it; I forgot to ask him…but it had lost none of it's beauty, and possibly even gained some with it's sleek new finish.
I looked up at Riley, ready to refuse...I mean, this was one of his most prized possessions, and he was giving it to me. I had thought he had been foolish a few times before now, but to what extent must one be foolish enough to rearrange a class-A electric guitar and give it to me?
I didn't have time to ask him – Riley smiled and dropped the guitar into my hands before I could refuse him.

"Please take it", he said.
"Take it and practice. Then, when you get back, we can make our own rock band."

I was speechless. I didn't know what to say...in my mind, I was still calling him a fool for doing this for me…but in the end, my gratitude wore on, and I just smiled.

"What'll we call ourselves?", I asked in sudden breathlessness, cradling the guitar in my arms.

"...Dunno", Riley answered.
"You think of something."

I grinned happily;
"How about 'Blue Sabbath'?"

Riley laughed.

"Great. We'll be all over the charts before you know it."

I set the guitar down, and didn't even have to ask for the next thing. Riley lifted me gently into his arms, and we hugged. Under my hands, I could feel his strong body through his t-shirt. His hair smelled good, and his heart was at ease. I felt him loving my body, soul, and spirit, and I felt blessed to have him. I loved him as much as he did me…and somehow, his love was enough to fight away the oncoming feelings of dread that came with the thought of leaving him.
I put my head near his neck and whispered into his ear;
"I love you, Riley."

I felt him squeeze me just a bit tighter, and he answered me in a whisper of his own;
"I love you too, Auron."

When we finally broke away, I felt refreshed. I felt strong again, ready to take on the world.
I jumped to the ground and shouldered my pack.
When I looked back up, I looked upon my family, and I knew that I was the luckiest guy on this world…for I had a family, and that was all that mattered. I would keep them safe, no matter what, and no ill feeling or bounty hunter from space could ever keep me from doing so.

"I love you all", I said, with tears in my eyes as I surveyed them lovingly.
"I promise that I'll be back, soon enough...and I'll think of you everyday."

Dr. Hartrum nodded with a smile, and Lara grinned. Rebecca wiped a friendly tear away, and Riley beamed.

"We'll be thinking of you, too", he said.

"Yeah", Lara said.
"For sure."

"Every day!", Rebecca piped.

"You'll be our inspiration!", Dr. Hartrum saluted.

I smiled at them all.
The enormous amount of protectiveness, pride, and love that I had for all of them seemed to pour from my face like honey (I blew my nose quickly).
Before I broke down and started crying, however, I picked up the new, improved guitar, and plucked a few strings carefully.

"I love you", I said to them.
"This song is for everyone who gave something to me...everybody that put me where I am now, for I wouldn't have had any moment of my life any other way."

I began to back off along the path Riley had shown to me, that would lead me to a place where I could make my own way. I ran my fingers along the strings along the strings of the guitar, as if opening a concert. I saw all their faces, and I felt ready and capable to do anything – even to change the Heavens and move the world. I would be there when they needed me; that was my promise.
The song that came forth was from my heart, as much as it did from the spirit of the legendary Scorpions that clung to the lyrics. I had always liked the song 'Wind of Change' the most; the music video, after Riley explained to me the concept of the Berlin Wall, had brought tears to my eyes…and now, it did again. To see the smiling, beaming faces of my wonderful family fueled my soul, made my legs walk, my fingers play, and my voice sing. The song that came forth was as much mine as was possible…but it was dedicated to my family, to my memories, and to what lay ahead of me.


I follow the Moskva
Down to GorkyPark
Listening to the wind of chaaange...

An August summer night
Soldiers passing by
Listening to the wind of chaaange...

The world is closing in
Did you ever think
That we could be so close, like broootherrrs...
The future's in the air
I can feel it everywhere
Blowing with the wind of chaaange...

Take me to the magic of the moment
On a glory night
Where the children of tomorrow dream away...
In the wind of change...

Walking down the street
And distant memories
Are buried in the past forever...
I follow the Moskva
Down to GorkyPark
Listening to the wind of chaaange...

Take me to the magic of the moment
On a glory night
Where the children of tomorrow share their dreams...
With you and me...

Take me to the magic of the moment
On a glory night
Where the children of tomorrow dream away...
In the wind of change...

The wind of change blows straight into the face of time
Like a storm wind that will ring the freedom bell
For peace of mind
Let your balalaika sing
What my guitar wants to saaay...

Take me to the magic of the moment
On a glory night
Where the children of tomorrow share their dreams...
With you and me…Take me, to the magic of the moment
On a glory night
Where the children of tomorrow dream away...
In the wind of change...


When I had finished, I could barely see the Riley and the rest of my family in the distance. I cast my eyes out, and gripped the last view I would get of it for some time. I held onto this far, distant scene, and copied it into my mind as if it were a postcard or photograph.
I turned to face my path, which was sandy. To my right, I could see the ocean.
I clenched my teeth and pushed ahead - once again on my own, but this time with somebody strong in my corner.
I reached into the backpack, and pulled out a photo album I had taken with me. Already I felt homesick, and I began flipping through the pages. Again and again I saw Riley, Rebecca, Lara, and even Dr. Hartrum. I saw my family, and I smiled.
I knew that my path was now in motion, but I also knew that my home was and would always be back there. I would return, and I'd be greeted with love; the love I had craved even before I knew of it's meaning, ever since I fell out of the breeding tube in Jumba's lab.
I now had a family...perhaps I had it all along, and only discovered it until recently.
I love my family, and I'm proud to be considered a member of them. No matter where I go, no matter how far I travel from them, I'll always be able to turn around and go back home, where they would always be waiting for me.

I love them, and I love them forever.

Thank you for listening to my story.


The End
A/N: Alright - the final chapter is re-worked and re-editted! One more piece to go, and I'm done!
I do hope that I did well on the revising of this chapter - more than once I felt that I have detailed it abit too much (in areas that don't need detailing)...oh well; I think I did good, overall. My greatest concern is that I have ruined whatever past mysthsism there was in the previous version of the chapter. My previous attempts of making it dramatic seemed well-received, so I hope very much that I haven't mutilatated it...for any returning readers who might read this, please give me your opinion.

(Disclaimer: I don not own the song 'Wind of Change'; it belongs to the Scorpions )