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Pokemaniac Chelsea: STUPID MICROCRAP WORD!!!

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~ In some clearing at a forest, with a table set up in the center and tons of little creatures/people in cages. ~

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Knight Dude: All right. This one's full! Take it away!

The Four Poe Sisters: *Hum some death row song*

Knight Dude: Next!

Nabooru: *Put Koume and Kotake up on the table* Found these guys trying to kill me at the Spirit Temple!

Lesser Knight Dude: Let me see those!

Kotake: Hey!

Lesser Knight Dude: *Snaps Koume and Kotake's broomsticks in half*

Koume: Bitch!

Lesser Knight Dude: Your flying days are over! *Pushes them elsewhere*

Knight Dude: Twenty rupees for the witches!

Nabooru: THAT'S IT?! And you guys call yourselves royals of Hyrule? *Takes the twenty rupees* ::Sotto voice:: Lousy twenty rupees...

King Dodongo: *Crying in a cage* This cage is too small!

Navi: Don't turn me in, sir! I'll never say "HEY! LOOK! LISTEN!" ever again! I'll never say pretty straightforward, and otherwise stupid things again, either! Please! I can change! You gotta believe me!

Great Deku Tree: Oh shut up!

Knight Dude: Next! What do you have?

Kakariko Villager: A little wooden puppet! *Holds up Pierre, the scarecrow!*

Pierre: I'm not a puppet! I'm a real...um...scarecrow!

Knight Dude: Five rupees for the possessed pile of straw. Take it now. *Watches Pierre get hocked off at the Pawn Shop* NEXT! What do you have?

Great Deku Tree: I have a talking fairy!

Knight Dude: Well, that's worth ten rupees...if you can prove it.

Great Deku Tree: No problem! Go ahead, little missy!

Navi: ...

Knight Dude: Well?!

Great Deku Tree: Oh, she's just nervous! Really! She's quite the annoying piece of crap! C'mon, you boneheaded fair-

Knight Dude: That's it! I have had enough of the senile tree! Guards! Take it away!

Great Deku Tree: No! She talks! She loves to talk! *Pretends to be Navi by heightening his voice* I can talk! I love to talk! I'm the talkiest damn thing you ever saw!

Knight Dude: Get him out of my sight! And "talkiest" isn't even a word!

Great Deku Tree: Uh... No! No! I swear! *Swings branches and hits some magic fairy dust and it spills all over on Navi*

Navi: Hey! I can fly!

Goron: She can fly?

Everyone: She can fly!

Knight Dude: She can talk!

Navi: Ha ha! That's right, foo'! I bet you have seen a house fly! Maybe even a super fly! But you have never seen...a FAIRY FLY! Well, maybe you have, considering the fact that fairies can fly. But wait...if I could fly...why didn't I just fly out of here before? Darn, I am so dumb!

Great Deku Tree: You got that right.

Knight Dude: Seize her!

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~ Farther down into the forest, Navi flies and flies until she meets up with Link. The LKD is still at her tail...wings...whatever. ~

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Lesser Knight Dude: You there! Hylian!

Link: Huh?

Lesser Knight Dude: *Brandishes a large scroll* By the order of Lord Ganondorf, I am authorized to place you both under arrest and transport you to a designated...

Link: *Looms over LKD, glaring*

Lesser Knight Dude: ...resettlement...facility!

Link: Says you and what army?

Lesser Knight Dude: *Looks behind him and sees no one* Darn! Why didn't I get some recruits before I left? Oh well. Might as well go back. *Walks away*

Link: *Starts back for home*

Navi: *Flies after him* HEY! Can I say something to you?

Link: Oh, help... A talking fairy named Navi! *Starts running away*

Navi: *Follows* LOOK! I just want to tell you that what you did back there was really really great; those guards they thought they was all of it, and then you showed up and bang!, they were tripping over themselves like skull kids in the woods! Hah, it made me really good to see that-

Link: That's excellent.

Navi: It's great to be free!

Link: Yes! Now go return to your own friends.

Navi: Er...I don't have any friends.

Link: Yes, and I can see why.

Navi: And I'm not going back there by myself! Hey, I got a better idea! I'll stay here with you!

Link: HELL NO!

Navi: You're a mean, green, fighting machine! Together, we can scare the pants off anyone who crosses us!

Link: *Pauses, turns towards Navi and screams* ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAR!!!!!!!

Navi: ..............Now that was really scary! (Not.) And if you don't mind me saying this, if that don't work, your breath will get the job done because you definately need some Tic Tacs or something because your breath stinks!

Link: *Continues walking away*

Navi: *Follows* You like, burned the hair right out of my nostrils...of couse, how do I even know if I have nostrils because you can't even see my body because it's nothing but a ball of gas...which reminds me of the time-

Link: *Covers Navi's mouth*

Navi: Mmmhhhhhh mhhhhhhhhh, mmhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmm, mhmm!

Link: *Uncovers Navi's mouth*

Navi: And man, there were strong gasses leaking out of my butt that day! That means...if I even have a butt.

Link: Why are you following me?!

Navi: *Sings* I'm alllllllllllll alone! There's no one here but me! My problems have all gone! There's no one here to deeerrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiide MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! But you gotta have frieeeeeeeeeends!

Link: STOP SINGING!!! No wonder you don't have any friends!

Navi: Only a true friend would be that truly honest!

Link: Navi, look at me! What am I?

Navi: *Looks up* A human?

Link: No! I'm a Hylian... Well, I guess that would be right since Hylians are technically humans...or are they elves? Whatever! But doesn't that bother you? You know? Grab your braziers and swords!

Navi: No...

Link: Really?

Navi: Really, really! Hey I like you! What's your name, anyway?

Link: Link. *Starts walking*

Navi: *Follows* Well you know what I like about you Link? You have that 'I don't care what other people think' attitude. I like that. I respect that! *Stares forwards* WHOO! Who would want to live in a place like that?

Link: That would be my home, you little hoe.

Navi: Why! What a nice home! You have such a modest budget...of couse...back in medieval times, there were no budgets were there? So I guess I can't really say that! Wow! What a nice Deku nut! I love that nut.

Link: ...

Navi: I guess you don't do much entertainment, huh?

Link: I like my privacy.

Navi: So do I! Don't you hate it when you have someone in your face, and you try to give them the hint and they don't leave...and then there is that big awkward silence?

Link: ............

Navi: ...........

Link: ..........

Navi: Can I stay with you?

Link: WHAT?!

Navi: Can I stay with you? Please?

Link: Of course!

Navi: Really?

Link: In your dreams.

Navi: Please! I don't want to go back there where I am considered an annoying piece of crap! You don't know what it's like to be a freak...well, maybe you do! And that's why we have to stick together!

Link: Okay! For one night only.

Navi: YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY! *Flies inside Link's house* This is so great! We can stay up late, swap some stories, and in the morning, I'm making waffles- although there is no such thing as waffles in this time period!

Link: D'OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!!

Navi: Where do I sleep?

Link: OUTSIDE!

Navi: Well, I guess that's cool. I mean, I don't know you and you don't know me or anything. *Flies outside* I mean, I'm a fairy. I was born outside and I guess I have to find my place outside.

Link: *Steps inside and slams the door behind Navi*

Navi: I'm all alone...there's no one here but me...

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To be continued... o.o