"Hey Spacemonkey." Jack appeared at the door.

"Hey Jack," Daniel tried to grin.

Jack looked at his friend and whistled. "No wonder you didn't want an office job- I never knew the dangers!"

"They're only dangers to Daniel!" Janet called from the other side of the room.

But Jack wasn't done. "You're safer with the Goa'uld than you are with yourself!"

"Yeah- do me a favor and mention that to Hammond for me. I've tried to chase him down on my wheelchair, but he walks too fast."

Jack cracked a grin. "Really, Daniel, one would think that you're self- abusive or something. Or just very fond of a very special lady. . ."

Daniel glared.

"Well, everything seems to happen to you, doesn't it," Jack resumed the original subject.

Daniel grimaced. "Well, you need a new SG team member for that now, don't you? And as the current holder of the title, I pass it to you. Bear it proudly, 'Jack, the Accident Prone.'"

"Thanks Danny, that means a lot to me," Jack said dryly.

General Hammond rapped on the doorframe suddenly and entered.

"So you're NOT avoiding me!" Daniel exclaimed brightly. Maybe he was hanging around with Jack too much.

General Hammond tried to ignore Daniel, but that task was made rather difficult by the fact that he had gone there to speak with him. "Doctor Jackson, I heard you had another catastroph- mishap. I needed to make sure that you are still alive."

"I am," Daniel said unnecessarily. Yup, DEFINITELY too much time with Jack.

The general began to think out loud. "You aren't really doing much better in your current position, but I don't enjoy firing someone with your brilliance- you know too much anyway. . . Maybe I'll just assign you to the kitchens or something."

Daniel looked as though the general had suggested handing him over freely to the Goa'uld.

"Oh, no, Sir," Jack moaned to Daniel's benefit, "Not with all the knives . . .!"

"Point taken, Colonel O'Neil." "General," Daniel pleaded, "I'm not doing any better here. In fact, I'm doing WORSE here. I go to the infirmary at least once a day! SG-1 suffers without me- PLEASE put me back on SG-1!!"

Hammond looked down at Daniel and his whipped-puppy expression and sighed. "I'll consider it." He walked out.

Jack looked down at his friend and shrugged. "That's the best you're going to get for now, Danny-Boy. I have to go." Right before he reached the door, he stopped and looked back. "Oh, and nice translation."

Daniel sighed and wished he could leave just as easily.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It was another week until Daniel saw General Hammond, and as Janet had refused release the archeologist, it was in the infirmary where they met again.

"Doctor Jackson, I've made my decision."

Daniel looked up at him hopefully.

"Against my better judgment-"

Daniel's heart leapt- this HAD to be a good thing-

"-I've decided to fire you. As soon as you are well, I want you out of this facility."

Daniel's jaw dropped. The heart monitor that Janet insisted upon using flat-lined for five seconds.

"Just kidding!" Hammond burst. "As soon as you are healed, you are to be reassigned to the SG-1 team!" He left.

Daniel stared after him, jaw slack and face pale from shock. "That. . . Is a cruel. . . cruel man. . . .Janet- fetch the Smelling Salts." And he fainted.

~END!!!~