Let me get the obvious out of the way. I don't own anybody involved in the story with the exception of JP, and that's because I'm JP. Hopefully something interesting will happen to me in this chapter. Shall we find out?

Okay, Austin's out getting toasted and shit, so I'm on narration duty for this chapter. When we last left off, I heard Freddy bringing his burnt ass down the stairs. My first instinct was to run for the back door which, as it turned out, was a useless idea. The shit was locked tighter than Jessica Simpson before her marriage. I just knew I was fucked when all the doors in the room closed leaving me and Freddy trapped in this little ass room.

JP: You're gonna kill me and all, so I just want one last request.

Freddy: And what would that be, little piggy?

JP: Two request now, with one being please don't call me little piggy again. The other one is (pulls a FAT blunt out of his pocket) can I at least smoke this L?

Freddy: (thinks for a second) Only if you share, mmman!

JP: You smoke WEED?! Seriously?

Freddy: Hell yeah, man! Dude I, like, smoke all the time. Why do you think my house was always all foggy and stuff?

JP: So, let's make a deal. I smoke with you and you don't kill me.

Freddy: That'll be totally awesome, dude!

JP: Hey? What happened to your deep scary voice? Where'd that hippy voice come from?

Freddy: I only do the scary voice when I'm gonna kill someone.

JP: Cool. So, where are we smoking?

Freddy: I'm gonna transport us to my super secret smoke spot.

Seconds later yours truly and the dream stalker were in this big, awesome room with video games, three big-screen T.V.'s, beanbag chairs, lava lamps, bongs, rolling papers, boxes of Dutch Master and Phillie cigars, and all kinds of other cool shit. I looked around and, for some reason, my instincts pointed me to a door. I walked up to it, then looked at Freddy.

JP: If I open this door, I don't have to worry about some crazy shit jumping out to kill me. Right?

Freddy: I think you're gonna like what's in there.

Taking my chances, I opened the door. At first I didn't see anything. Then I looked down and noticed a ladder. Then I saw where the ladder lead to.

JP: IS THIS FOR REAL?!!

Freddy: Well, you know how Uncle Scrooge had that money bin in "Ducktales?" Well, this is my weed bin.

JP: I'm in heaven. Do you swim in it like Scrooge does his money?

Freddy: Only when I'm getting some to smoke.

JP: Enough talk. Let us partake of this magical green herb the world calls marijuana!

Freddy: Spoken like a true pothead. Oh, some of my friends are coming over.

JP: Okay. Long as we smoke, I don't care if Jason Voorhees is coming.

Freddy: Speaking of which, he should be here any minute with the beer.

I raised an eyebrow to that comment. What kind of night was I in for now?

JP: See, now that's how a narrator's 'sposed to narrate. I got right to the point. I hope that jackass from Chapter 1 was watching. He was probably too busy running from that fake ass scarecrow. Anyway, is Austin back yet?

S.C.: Yeah, and I'm drunk.

JP: Well, good. Chapter three's about to start soon. So, get ready.

S.C.: Can I be in it?

JP: WHAT?!

SC: I said can I be in the next chapter?

JP: Why the fuck not?

SC: Good! That means more beer.

Yeah, this chapter was short, but I don't intend to make this a long story anyway. I hope you guys find it both funny and stupid. That's basically what I'm going for. Anyway, catch ya next chapter.