This is Shelby's story

            The doorknob turned to Shelby's room.  Damn, I thought I locked it.  She turned over in her bed, bringing the sheets tightly around her.  Don't do it, don't do it, she repeated in her mind over and over again.  He came over to her and pulled her onto her back so she could see him.  She tried to remain stoic, but fear was pulsing through her veins and she knew she looked terrified.

            "Hi, Shelby.  I've missed you," Walt said softly.

            "Go away."

            "I can't.  See, I'm kinda cold and your mom is asleep and won't wake up.  You'll make me warm, won't you?"

            "No."

            "What's that?"

            "No, I won't keep you warm.  Not any more."

            "Not any more?  What are you talking about?" He slipped out of his boxers and into bed with Shelby.  She moved as far to the edge of her bed without falling off.  He pulled her back to him, beer and cigarette smoke lingered on his breath.  He put his hand under her t-shirt and squeezed her breasts.  She tried to pull away, but she knew it was no use.  Walt was too strong and was somewhat drunk.  She closed her eyes and thought of her sister, Jess, and best friend Patty, and all the things they liked to do together.  She thought of her school, movies she wanted to see, anything but was taking place in her bedroom, inside her body.  Finally he was finished and left.  Shelby made sure the door was locked before throwing herself on her bed and sobbing into a pillow.  Why was this her life?  How could her mother not stop him from coming in, or not even know?  What if he was doing this to her sister too?  Shelby couldn't even think of it.  She had to get out.  She didn't care where she went or what she did, she had to get out.  She found a bag and stuffed some clothes, a toothbrush, and the little money she had hidden in her room.  It was barely enough for a cheap hotel room for one night.  Quietly she made her way into the kitchen and found the coke can her mom had cut the bottom out of and stuffed with emergency money.  If this isn't considered emergency, I don't know what is

            She wrote a quick note to her mom and to Jess and left as quietly as she could.  Once she turned the corner, she broke into a run.  She ran until her legs gave out on her and she collapsed on the side of the road, under a bridge.  Too exhausted to do anything, she curled up in a ball and slept under the bridge.  The following morning she took a bus to Patty's town and made her way over to her apartment.  When Patty answered the door, Shelby's eyes filled with built up tears.  Patty looked irritated at first, then when she saw Shelby her face immediately softened and invited her in.

            "Shelby what's wrong?  You look horrible!" she led Shelby to her couch, then went into the kitchen and brought out some coffee and a box of Kleenex.  Shelby sipped her coffee for a few minutes and tried to gain some composure before telling Patty what happened.

            "Walt, he would leave my mother's side and come into my room.  He had no pattern.  Whenever he felt like it.  He didn't seem to find anything wrong with it, he thought it was…normal.  My mom, she knew he did it, I just know she knew.  Our place isn't that big.  The walls are thin, our mattresses creak.  I hate him for doing this to me, and I hate her for letting him!"

            "Shel, are you sure she knew?"

            "How could she not?" Shelby was quiet for a few moments.  "I can't go back there.  Can I stay here?  Just for a while.  I'll raise money and get my own place, and once I get enough I'll go back and get Jess so she doesn't have to stay with that monster."

            "Sure, that's fine," Patty said, putting an arm around Shelby.  "How are you going to get the money?"

            "I – I'm not sure." But Shelby knew what she had to do.  Now she just had to go through with it.

            Two nights later Patty arrived back at the apartment with drugs from her latest boyfriend and already high.

            "Come on, Shel, it takes your mind off of everything!"

            "Um, I think I'll pass tonight, Patty.  I'll have a smoke though."

            Patty tossed Shelby a pack and settled on the couch.  She pulled a bag out of her jacket pocket and dumped some on the table.  She went to work dividing it then sniffed one of the three piles.  Shelby stopped paying attention to Patty and went off into her own little world, trying to think of how to put her plan to action.  She was jolted back to reality when Patty choked out her name: "Shelby!"

            Shelby stared in horror as Patty slumped to the ground.  Surely she's joking, Shelby thought.  She shook Patty but she didn't move, her eyes didn't even flutter.  "Patty, wake up.  Wake up!  This isn't funny.  I'm gonna call 911.  I'm calling 911!" Shelby threatened, reaching for the phone, positive Patty would jump up and laugh at her.  But she didn't move.  Scared, she reached her hand over to her neck to feel for a pulse.  She felt around a few times and still didn't feel anything.  She jumped back, terrified, and called 911.

            "My friend, I think she OD'd.  She just fell to the floor and she's not breathing or moving and I can't find a pulse…" Shelby spilled out.

            "Okay, ma'am, can I have your name?" the operator asked.

            "Sarah.  Sarah Jones." Shelby said.  Better if nobody knew her name, especially if her mom was looking for her.

            "Okay Miss Jones.  Please give me the address, and we'll send somebody over."

            Shelby gave her the address, stayed on the phone for a few minutes before hanging up on the lady and ran out.  She was halfway down the stairs when she remembered what Patty had told her one night: "If I die, I don't want anybody to know who I am.  My life hasn't been good enough to earn a headstone or a fancy coffin.  My parents don't deserve knowing I have died, just dropped off the face of the earth."  She ran back upstairs and rooted through Patty's purse.  She grabbed her wallet, ran into the bedroom and took her extra stash of cash, and her few pictures of her and her family.  She shoved them in her bag and ran off.  She could see the lights flashing and the sirens blaring.  She went out the back door and ran.  She ran into a little hallway between two stores and curled up in a ball.  There, she let herself cry.  She cried until she couldn't anymore.  Finally she raised her head and there was a pair of legs standing in front of her.  She started and brought her bag to her chest.

            "Hey, hey, calm down, I'm not gonna take anything.  You were crying for a long time," he said.

            "How long have you been watching me?" Shelby asked, surprised.

            "I saw you run in here and followed you.  Look, kid, I don't mean you no harm.  You're a runaway, right?"

            "Why do you want to know?"

            "Well, your hiding, you got a bag that definitely ain't a purse.  Your scared, too.  I'm right, aren't I?" he said.  Shelby didn't say anything.  "Well, I can help you."

            "I highly doubt that."

            "I'll give you money – whatever you ask as long as its reasonable – for a few favors."

            "Favors." A statement, not a question.

            "Yeah.  I'll take you home with me, fix ya something to eat, you go to bed with me, I pay you, we never see each other again, unless you want to.  Your such a pretty thing."

            Shelby stayed silent.  She thought, if she could get a certain amount of money, she could find an apartment, a job, and Jess.  "My lowest offer would be five hundred."

            "Deal, baby."  He helped her up and took her to his car.  Shelby stared out the window, not believing what she was doing.  Just a few nights ago she was afraid of her stepfather coming on to her, and now she was selling her body to a stranger she just met.  She pushed the thought out of her head, consoled herself that it was just this once.  The man introduced himself as James, and took her to his house, which was actually pretty nice, and lead her inside.  He fixed some chili for her, then lead her to his room.  The bed looked so comfortable, clean sheets and a big down comforter.  James undressed and lay down in the bed.  Shelby didn't know what to do, so she just undressed and got in bed next to James.  She let him do what he wanted and tried to get into it.  Finally he was done and curled up next to her and fell asleep.  Shelby lay there, not sleeping, waiting for the morning to come so she could get her money and leave.

            The next morning James cooked her breakfast.  As she left, he handed her $600 and his phone number.  "In case your up for anything.  And the extra $100 was a tip." He smiled at her and showed her to the door.  This is the decision she made that changed the direction of her life.  Before he shut the door, she handed him the paper back.

"I won't be needing this again." Then she left, feeling extremely dirty.  She knew she mad the right decision, not to do it again.  She couldn't think of what would happen if she got some sort of disease or got pregnant.  Forcing the thoughts out of her head, she found a café and got a paper and a cup of coffee.

            "Ma'am, pardon if I'm being rude, but you don't look too good," the waitress said.

            "I know, I had a bad night.  Do you know of any apartments or job openings around here?" Shelby asked, trying to push the attention away from her.

            "Yeah, look in the classifieds.  There's some apartments a few blocks that way that are pretty nice and a good price.  The electronic store needs a cashier, so does the grocery store.  The restaurant across the street wants a hostess.  Go ask around, I'm sure you can find something."

            "Thanks a bunch." Shelby started to pull some money from her bag when the woman stopped her.

            "No, hon, its on the house.  If you don't have any luck at the other stores, come back by here and I'll see what I can do.  What's your name?"

            "Shelby."
            "Nice to meet you Shelby.  I'm Rachel."

            Shelby smiled and left and made her way to the apartments.  A man was at the front desk and looked up when she came in.

            "Can I help you?"

            "Uh, yeah, I'm looking for an apartment?"

            "Okay, how many bedrooms are you looking for?"

            "Just one."

            "They start at $300.  Want to see a floor plan?"

            "Yes." Shelby leaned over the sheets of paper he handed to her.  It was one bedroom, one bathroom, a living area, dining area, and a kitchen.  A few had balconies. 

            "We have onsite laundry.  Parking isn't assigned.  There's a pool near the back and a weight room.  Would you like to see a room?" 

            Shelby nodded.  The man called someone on the phone and a few seconds later a woman walked in and took Shelby to an apartment on the third floor.  It was fairly spacious – two beds could easily fit in the bedroom.  The dining area was small and was in the same space as where a living area would be.  The living area had a balcony.

            "How much extra is a balcony?"

            "Well, most of the apartments have one, so we don't charge extra."

            Shelby looked around.  "Could I get this one?  Now?"

            "Well, you'll need to fill out some paper work.  We can probably get everything cleared in a day or so.  Do you have any furniture you need to store?"

            "No, I don't have any right now."

            "Oh.  Well, there's a used furniture place on the other side of town, near the schools, and there's always lots of stuff in the paper.  Lets go down and start filling out papers, okay?'

            "Okay." Shelby followed the woman back to the main building to an office.  She filled out the papers, and made the down payment.  She could move in in two days. 

            "Do you have somewhere to stay while you wait?"

            "Uh, yeah.  Thanks, see you in a few days." Shelby left, thankful they didn't ask any uncomfortable questions, and that they believed her story of dead mother and missing father.  She went back to the café and sat at the same table.  Rachel smiled when she saw Shelby.

            "Back so soon?"

            "Yeah.  I have a favor to ask.  Do you think I could stay with you, or someone, for two days?  I just got an apartment and don't really have enough for an apartment.  I'll pay you back somehow, free labor or first of whatever paycheck I get."

            "Well, I don't really have room at my apartment.  I have a two year old and she takes up a lot of space.  My co-worker has a spare bedroom she uses for when her sister comes to visit.  I'm sure she'll let you stay."  Rachel put some coffee down for her then went over to another woman, who then came over.

            "Shelby, this is Carrie. Carrie, Shelby.  She said it was okay for you to stay at her place and you don't need to pay her back."
            "Thank you so much, I really, really appreciate it," Shelby said, shaking Carrie's hand.

            "No problem.  If you need to go look around town and such, go ahead, but be back here by 6, that's when my shift is over."

            "Okay.  See you then."

            Shelby bent over the classifieds and circled jobs and furniture.  Then she went to the used furniture store and wrote down prices.  Then she called Jess.  She was relieved when it was her sister who answered.

            "Jess, its me, do NOT say my name.  Pretend I'm someone else and go into another room."

            "Nobody's here, don't worry."

            "Can I trust that?"

            "Mom's at work and Walt's running errands.  Where are you?"

            "Jess, you have to promise me something, okay?"

            "Promise."

            "Jess this is serious, I need to know you won't tell anyone, not even Caitlin."

            "Okay, I promise, I really do."

            "Jess, I'm in a little town about an hour from home.  I'm okay.  I just bought an apartment.  Its one bedroom, and I want you to come live with me.  I can't let you live in that place with Walt," Shelby said urgently.  Jess was silent.  "Jess?  You there?"

            "How did you know?"

            "Know what?"

            "He did it to you too, didn't he?"

            "Oh, god, Jess!  Yes, yes he did.  Pack your bags, hide them under your bed.  Find all the money you've saved and bring it with you.  I'm going to look for a job tomorrow and buy some furniture, but I'll need some help.  There's a school here and you can enroll here.  I'll pick you up in a few days, at night.  I'm going to see if I can borrow someone's car to pick you up.  If not I'll get you by bus.  Be ready, okay?  I'll call you the afternoon before I'm going to leave and tell you when to be ready, okay?"

            "Okay, Shel.  I miss you so much!" Jess' voice cracked.  Shelby felt her eyes fill with tears.

            "I miss you too.  Love you, see you in a few days."  She hung up and wiped her eyes, then went by a few stores and picked up applications.  She went to the park and sat down and filled out the applications and decided what furniture she should buy.  She knew Jess had at least $300 saved.  Jess always had better goals with her money than Shelby.  Shelby had $50 when she left home, just a little over $100 from her mom's stash; Patty had about $400, and then the $600 from the night before.  $200 was a down payment on the apartment, and she had spent $50 during her stay with Patty.  She could buy two mattresses, a table, 2 chairs, and a futon with what she had and still have enough between her and Jess until she got hired and received a paycheck.  The mattresses cost $100, the futon $200, and the table and chairs set was $75.  She got a phone at Target for $30.  The man would deliver it the day she moved in.  She dropped off the applications on her way back to the café.  Carrie was there, waiting for her.  It was a short walk to her apartment.  Carrie was very nice, and didn't ask her difficult questions.  She had to notice that Shelby was just barely 16.  She showed her gratitude by helping make dinner, and making most of it.  Her mother working late and Walt never being much help made her a good cook, and Carrie praised the food.  After dinner they sat on the couch and watched TV.  Carrie used that time to ask the questions.  Shelby knew she could trust Carrie and told her the whole story.

            "And last night, my best friend OD'd.  I took off, I didn't want the police to find me and take me back home.  I found shelter and cried for her, and this guy came up and offered me money and a place to stay for…favors.  I had thought about it before, when I first ran away.  I gave him a high price and he accepted.  I hated it, I felt worse than I ever did when Walt came in my room.  I left and found the café, and Rachel was so nice, and then I found the apartment, met you, bought furniture, and here I am."

            Carrie was silent for a few moments.  "Shelby, you need to tell the police about what he did to you.  It's very illegal, and he should have known not to do that.  If you tell the cops, they can take him away from you, and he can't do it to you again."

            "I can't do that.  He did it to my sister too, and I've already told her I'm picking her up.  She's going to come live with me and go to school here, and we're going to start our lives over again, without him.  And maybe I'll start looking for our dad."

            "You need to be realistic, Shelby."
            "I am!  For once in my life, I've taken control of things and doing what I have to do.  Let me try to do this on my own, and if it doesn't work, I'll tell the police."

            "Okay.  Well, I'm going to bed, let me show you your bedroom and the bathroom.  If you need anything, let me know.  I have to be at work at 8 tomorrow.  I'll leave the spare keys on the kitchen table.  Goodnight."

            Two days later the apartment was hers.  Her furniture arrived and she set everything up, and realized she didn't have any bedding.  She went back to Target and got some two beds in a bag for $30 and a few blankets.  She made the beds and put the blankets on the futon.  When she arrived at the café she realized she didn't have any eating utensils.  Rachel and Carrie chipped in and bought her some stuff and gave her glasses from the café.  Rachel gave her a picture to hang on the wall and Carrie gave her her old TV stand, for when she got a TV.  Shelby's eyes filled with tears of gratitude and hugged her new friends.  Carrie even offered to take Shelby to pick up her sister.  Shelby agreed and called Jess to let her know of the plans.  At 2am, Carrie pulled up to the entrance of the park.  Jess was waiting behind a bush.  Carrie helped her put her bags in the car and the second Jess was in the car she attached herself to Shelby, crying.  She didn't let go even when they arrived back in town and Shelby took her to the apartment.  She had to push the mattresses together in order for Jess to let go, and still she slept close to Shelby. 

            The next day they got settled and Shelby showed her around town.  She would enroll in school the following week.  That night Shelby got calls from all the places she applied to, and set up meeting times with each of them.  Throughout the week Carrie and Rachel had them over for dinner and cooked enough for an army so they'd have something to take back with them.

            The day before school was to start she got a call from the hardware store.

            "Miss Merrick, we'd like to offer you a job here.  We'll start you at 6.50 an hour, is that okay?"

            "Yes, that's great."

            "We do have one condition.  We know somewhat of your condition and we'd like you to go to school, finish your education."

            "I need to work as much as I can.  Full-time."

            "We think you can do that.  Work Monday-Thursday from 3-8, Saturday and Sunday for 7 hours.  Just short of full-time, but if you prove to be a diligent worker, we'll up the pay a little to compensate.  You need to maintain good grades though.  It'll be tough, but you can do it.  Deal?"

            "Deal.  When can I start?"

            "Tomorrow.  You'll start school Tuesday, enroll tomorrow."

            "Okay.  Thank you so much."

            "Goodnight, Miss Merrick."

            "'Night."

            That night Shelby and Jess celebrated the news with Rachel and Carrie.  Rachel told Jess she could baby-sit her daughter Reese.  After dinner they went out for ice cream. 

            "Shelby, our lives are changing, right?" Jess asked later, as they were lying in bed.

            "Yeah, Jess, they are.  But for good.  You'll meet new friends tomorrow, Rachel and Carrie are really nice, I have a job, you'll have a temp job baby-sitting Reese, and we'll never have to see Walt again."

            "That's really horrible what he did to us.  I hope they get him for what he did."

            "I do too, Jess," Shelby whispered.  She kissed Jess' forehead and hugged her close as they drifted off to sleep, ready for a new day in their new life.