Part 7

LORNE AT NIGHTCLUB: "Well, those are some exciting products. Am I right?," Lorne took a puff of his cigarette and his audience clapped, then he continued, "Mmm. Let's all think about buying some of those. But if I can bring it down a moment," he took off his bright colored jacket, and the spotlight that was on him changed from blue to red, "Is there anything worse then feeling like you're alone? Like you're the only person in the world who thinks the way you do, and if anyone else found out, they'd drive a pointy wooden thing through your heart? And a for our fearless vampire killers…"

*~*~

Angel took an unnecessary deep cleansing breath to calm himself before exiting the bathroom. He decided to act as calmly as possible before hauling ass out of there unnoticed so they won't kill him.

He finally opened the bathroom door and came face to face with a concerned Buffy.


"You okay?" she asked.


He gave her a forced reassuring smile, "Yeah. Just… Cabin fever I guess."


"Oh. Okay. You wanna head back out?"


Angel inwardly gulped, "Yeah sure."


Buffy smiled and handed him his axe. After he reluctantly accepted it, Buffy offered her hand. He slipped his own hand into hers, and together they walked out of the room.


*~*~


All of them were now gathered in the lobby, minus Buffy and Angel. While Wesley was studying the unconscious Lorne up close, the two finally walked down the stairs, their hands still entwined.


Cordelia noticed their hands and then walked up to them with a flirtatious smile for Angel. When she reached the two, she seductively placed a hand on his arm, to which he just smiled politely at her and shrugged it off. He followed 'Joan' when she pulled him off further into the lobby.


Cordelia remained where she was standing in shock, "Excuse me? Did I just get the brush off? There really is some sort of horrible spell."


Xander and Willow watched her from the couches and rolled their eyes.


"Did anybody find anything?" Fred asked the group.


"Well let's see," Cordelia started off with a sarcastic tone, "Do you remember anything?"


"Wouldn't the vampire be coming after us anyhow," Willow tried to intercept the argument she felt coming on, "Aren't we vittles?"


Wesley nodded, putting his hands behind his back, "Five people, each unknown to each other, far from home, trapped at night," while Wesley spoke, Angel stared at Buffy's neck hungrily as she concentrated on Wes' speech, "I submit that the blood-sucking fiend may be closer than we dared suspect. That it may be…" he paused for dramatic effect and roams his eyes over the group individually, "that it may be one of us."


Angel's head shot up and his eyes were wide with fear and shock. At the same time Buffy cocked an eyebrow at the Englishman, "Uh…you're kidding."


"Wish that I were, Miss uh Joan, but the simple fact is… the fiend has been under our noses the entire time, waiting for the moment to…" at that moment, Wesley pulled out a cross from his breast pocket and shoved it in Gunn's face, emphasizing his last word of the sentence with the shove, "strike!"


Gunn's immediate reaction was punching him across the face, making Wes fall to the ground.


"See?" Angel snickered, the others trying to hide their own laughter, "This guy's whacked. Let's have a different theory."


Wesley glared at 'Liam'; "I'm not quite finished. I think it's only fair that everybody have a turn. The cross obviously doesn't affect me or our friend," Wes pointed the cross in his hand at Gunn, "the pugilist."


Gunn looked like he was going to pummel Wesley again with a more brutal hit, taking offense to the word Wes used to call him. But Gunn held back his violent urges and be fair since he didn't really know what the word meant. So he decided to go with the good old threat.


"Oh, your ass better pray I don't look that word up." Wesley just ignored Gunn.


Cordelia strolled up to Wesley and yanked the cross out of his hand. She waved it in front of her, and when there was no reaction, she scoffed and tossed the cross to Fred. Fred then started to scan the cross over her body like one of those guards with a metal detector wand. When she was done with her detecting, she handed it off to Xander, who tossed it from one hand to another. He beamed happily when nothing happened.


"Aha! Not the hell spawn!," he excitedly said and then threw it at Willow.


Willow caught it with ease and she examined the cross in her hand; her face wore an expression that was a mix of amusement and thoughtfulness.


"Hey, no vamp in me," Willow stated, then she held it out to Buffy, "Joan?"


Buffy crossed her arms and shifted her weight to her left foot.


"Why do I have to do it? I'm the one that FIGHTS the baddies."


"Joan, everyone has to do it. It's just a safety precaution," Wesley explained to Buffy.


"No," Cordelia calmly spoke up, "I don't think she needs to do it. It's obvious who the vamp is." She looked straight at Angel, and yet again, his eyes bulged out in fear and panic.


"Le-Let's not jump to conclusions here. I-I mean… I-I can't be-" Angel's panic-filled stutter was cut off by Cordelia.


"It's Joan."


Angel inconspicuously let out a breath of relief, but felt kind of guilty that this accusation where on Buffy when it was really him who was the vamp.


"WHAT?!" Buffy screeched, "How can it be me?"


"Well isn't it obvious? The way you know how to kill that… thing, you're way too strong to be human. Face it, we've found our perpetrator."


Buffy threw her hands up in the air and rolled her eyes then returning her glare towards Cordelia, "This is ridiculous! I am NOT the vamp."


"Then prove it," the brunette challenged. She took the wooden cross from Willow and stepped in front of Buffy, "Show us Little Miss Hero." She tauntingly held the top of the cross with her forefinger and thumb, waving it in front of Buffy's angered and annoyed face.


"Come on JOAN," Cordelia said. Buffy's supposed name in a mocking tone, "Everybody's waiting."


Buffy just stared at the arrogant brunette coldly for a few moments before matching the cross from the girl's hand.


"See?" Buffy made a show that nothing was going to happen with the cross, "Nothing! I told you I wasn't it."


Cordelia sneered at her and turned away, flipping her short hair as best as she could.


Buffy's cold exterior melted when she turned to Angel and put on a sweet smile, holding out the cross for him, "Liam?"


Angel hesitantly looked at it for a beat and then grabbed it. When it started to burn him and smoke was rising from where he held the cross, he quickly put it by his side where it was hard to see the reaction that would give away that he was the vampire.


"See?" Angel said with a little wince, "No vampire here I'm just like the rest of you."


Xander started sniffing the air, smelling something was burning. Little did he know that it was Angel who's hand was painfully scalding the impression of the cross in his hand.


"Does anyone else here-" he started but was cut off by Angel.


Angel spotted that Lorne was starting to come to and thanked the Lord that he found that distraction so he can get rid of the painfully offending object in his hand.


"Look the thing's awake!" he exclaimed.


When the attention was off of him and everyone went to look at Lorne, Angel tossed the cross over his shoulder.


"Don't get to close," Wesley warned everyone.


"Ooh…Oh… Guys, hey, that was quite a whammy. A little trip through the transitive nightfall of diamonds, if you know what I mean. I certainly don't, but-"


"What the hell is he talking about?" Angel said.


"Hey here's a funny sidebar," Lorne wriggled in the binds that were tightly wrapped around him, "I'm tied to a chair… again! What the hell's going on?"


Wesley's answer was to look at him evilly and say, "We were hoping you would enlighten us, spawn of evil."


"Oh dear. I'm starting to suspect my surefire hit spell closed out of town," Lorne paused to whimper, "Did anything go right? Anything? Did Cordy at least get her memory back?"


Wesley pointed at him, "Just tell us where the vampire is, fiend," Wes' demand made Angel tense up.


Lorne stared at Wesley strangely, "What are you talking about? There aren't any vampires here," Angel relaxed, well until Lorne finished his sentence, "Well, I mean, except for our boy here," he nodded towards Angel.


Everybody turned to Angel shocked. He hesitated and tried to save himself, "Uh… lying devil man."


"Oh like my spell made you not a vampire anymore. My magic isn't that-"


Lorne was cut off when Angel slammed his fist to Lorne's head hard and yelled, "Shut your mouth!" *~*~