"Drip, Drip, Drip, Drip……..BOOM"

SpellSong

Her eyes opened wide in a sudden shock that almost resembled panic. She though was too control, too tied back for panic and the realization struck her before a second second past. She pushed herself up slowly on one hand, gathering her grounding as quickly as her hand pushed her weight up from the black silk sheets, and gently detangled from the arm of the nights lovers next to her. She sat back a second looking at her pale hand and arm as it was looking pale than ever since her glow had gone from blue to black. Again, and always.

Sitting back set her odd balance so much so she put her hands to her head a second, only to notice the blackness again. Stupid, Casse, Stupid, stupid, stupid. You could have atleast remembered before getting into this. She coughed, a dry sound with nothing in her throat as her stomach already felt upside down, even though the sound wasn't even loud enough to offer a whisper, and barely even enough to get the attention of the deep sleeping man next to her.

Stupid, you incredible imbecile, an ounce of sense and you wouldn't be in this position. She pushed up slowly, focusing on keeping her balance, her finger gripped the black silk as she got herself off the bed, and feeling like the room had shifted gravity as her feet touched the plush carpet. She let go, almost blinding making for the bathroom if it weren't for the same still knowledge bellowing the screaming pain inside her. She stumbled, her body beginning to shudder violently on the lowest level, but to the normal eye she simple tripped on a piece of carpet in the dark.

Releasing the bathroom door as she pushed it close, it locked immediately as her stomach threw into revolt and she threw herself toward the toilet as she felt like all the in lungs had been evaporated suddenly. Dry heaves, and more dry heaves, she felt the consciousness of the world fade before the overwhelming blackness that began to emanate from her skin as if it were it's own light, her eyes beginning to match it, though nothing came but the change and the effect. She doubled over pulling a knee up and clinging to it, rocking slightly as she still had her head bowed over the toilet and her bare figure curled before it resting barely on her haunches.

Casse's stomache gave up after a second and the ringing hit her ears. She pulled her hands together in front of her trying to focus. Block the pain. The pain isn't there. The pain isn't there. It isn't real. Focus on the bowl, focus on the bowl, and focus on the bowl. A bubble of black light started to form in-between her hands, a deep black color changing back and forth, and forming a dingy swirl of black and gray into a bowl inside her hands. She rolled back on to her thighs and her small rounded bottom barely realizing as the bathroom floor chilled them, and set it in between her feet, pressing them to hold it steady.

Blackness began to seep into her vision outlining everything in the room as she held her left hand out palm up. She took her other hand, her middle finger, pressing it against her palm silently, and clenched her eyes shut, tensing her body. She curled the fingers over it and pressed it down with sudden pressure of her nail against her palm and winced as the pain coursed her body being a loud scream inside instead of a pinprick. She took her hand away but the nail was covered in blood at the moment and she started to form a fist and release, tensing and releasing over and over for 20 seconds.

She put her hand over the bowl, as her blood flow increased and began to drip from the puncture mark in her hand unhealing for the moment. For a second, then four it was blood, then it was a mixture of red looking paint mixed with what looked like dark black oil dripping from the cut, her whole body still illuminated in the color. Each drip was a forced moment as she lost the foot hold called her mind to the sweeping darkness, not of the creation and silliness that formed it, but of what had taken away from the beginning. RELEASE!

Drip. Drip. Drip.

Her mother kissing her brow and telling her she wouldn't be sick too much longer. Then the mothers' voice calling her the nickname and the beautiful eyes, those natural ones of life and joy, closing with such coldness. The tattoo on her hip, Patric laughing in the back of her mind in amusement. Her only conspiratorialist in the act. The cold wind, and the coldness of Patric anger, fear and pain caused by her as she rode away.

Drip. Drip.

The people who saved her, with their wide lips, and their bright white-gray eyes. The sailor with whiskey breath, his hands covered in calluses, so rough against her skin. Then the others with their brittle hair, and harsh expressions. Taking her hand, a child, barely near womanhood. The bow, standing on the bow, the smell of the sea filling her lungs…and then the blackness.

Drip-drip. Drip-drip. Drip-drip.

The challenge of the The Predator. The death of the first innocent at her own hands. The betrayal of Rejar at his most vulnerable. The screams of the babies as the building collapsed on them; the building she imperfected to fall on them. Heaven; pretty place -not for me-, can't stay. Outcast, even here. Bright light, beautiful music that too ethereal to be music. He talks to me, loves me even for my sins like I could some patron some mascot of his chance. Bel. Bel…Bel… Helper, dreamer, teacher, lover. Remy.

Drip-drip. Drip-drip. Drip-drip. Drip-drip.

They'd come for me, you were innocent colored one. Years fading, couldn't jeopardize you. Running, leaving, burning, crying in total nothingness. Patric. Patric. Need you. Comfort. Shelter. Other half of my soul. Why can't you hear me screaming when I don't say anything? Jean Luc Jr's dead……I saw him smile. Did you see it? Can't you hear the screaming?

Light began to bring her mind back to a consciousness of her physical form, though she never lost the position she'd left her body in. Her arm still held outward, palm dripping over the bowl. It was only blood now, and any glow around her body was gone all together now, leaving her an abhorrent pure white, lighter than white roses and snow. So pale, it was beyond all that was considered to be a whitened color.

Casse shivered as the feeling of chilly air in the room nipped her skin all over her bare body and she looked down at the bowl at the floor, filled to the brim with a substance so thick and gritty it wouldn't have even been expected to her come inside. The liquid a grainy dark black, glowing with a light around it already and beginning to disappear slowly. She swallowed slowly, her body beginning to adjust again as the last drop of pure red blood dropped into the mixture, adding the red streaks that looked like a swirl of paint in the blackness.

A noise sounded and she stilled like an animal about to attack and glanced the door, her sense brutally loud to her again. No, only Shinobi breathing deeply, and the house creaking. She curled the hand into a fist and closed her eyes as she started dredging up her normal well spring. Exhilarating the feeling of her being so close to perfectly clean again. So perfectly Perfected.

The bowl vanished and the liquid in it suddenly and her limbs felt like jelly and iron all at once, but in a way she felt good about. She used a hand on the counter as a lever to help herself up incase, but she found herself as she knew, to be fine. The mirror before her, she ignored the person who looked at her. Casse ran her hands from her neck crossed, over her chest, to her stomach slowly and down the sides of her hips before hugging her shoulders silently as she began to glow blue again around all her skin.

She was alive…for this moment -even if it would only ever be in this moment- that was enough.