Original Consequences follow the Prose.
Where Could Severus Snape possibly be?
A pool, cowering under a chair and taking illicit mixtures – again! Banana bum-bun anyone?
Pan Pool Party
It was just another day at Grimmauld Place for Molly Weasley, she was cleaning the Doxys out from the portraits and threatening to burn Mrs Black's portrait if she dare utter any more of her disgusting insinuations.
Other people were able to have fun, Severus Snape was out in the garden, floating on a pool the others had made during the summer. I'm floating down easy street on the lilo of life, he thought.
Molly was like the swallow of summer, a cascade of purples as she strived to sort everything out.
Severus lazily led, sunglasses on, a leg lazily lopped in the water, he was reading a book. 'How To Master Your Own Evil – A Guide To Changing Sides.' It had to be said he wasn't wearing a lot, just a baggy pair of black shorts and a pair of sunglasses – I believe I've said before. Anyway he blinked in the sun, he'd not seen a lot of it all year.
Molly – while indoors prepared a Pumpkin Pie and Banana Buns, that no matter what she did always ended up looking like buttocks. She knew that aside from her Professor Snape was the only one on the premises. Better ask if he'd care to join me for some Pumpkin Pie, she thought.
She proceeded to the garden, and looked over at the pool where Severus Snape looked relaxed for once.
"Professor Snape," she called. "Care to join me for a spot of lunch?"
He glanced up at her over his black shades and then back to his book. "No thank you," he muttered.
"Please Severus I'd hate to waste it."
"I'm not hungry," he said dryly.
"Well at least humour me," she said sounding irked.
"Look!" He snapped. "I tried to do this the polite way! I despise your cooking, there I said it!" Her mouth hung aghast. "Quit hounding me you old bat!" She glared at him.
Without a word she drained the pool of water.
"Really!" He snapped. "I'm warning you!" The she transfigured his glasses to be a giant slug. "Stop it! No!" He yelped as she turned his shorts into a small black thong – he went beetroot red.
"God Damn your ass is hot! Did I ever tell you your ass is hot, because your ass is HOT!!" She whooped as he rushed from the pool into the house and put his robes back on. "Now Snape – take back everything you said about my cooking!" She snapped while frying an egg in the kitchen.
"I most certainly will not! Not after that display!" He growled. She looked more menacing than before.
"Take it back!" She said.
"No!" He snapped.
"All right! That's it!" Mrs Weasley, normally a composed middle-aged woman had lost it. She threw the egg onto a plate, drained the fat and proceeded to chase Snape around the kitchen beating him with her pan. "How dare you insult my cooking you monster!" She wailed, he cowered under a chair, he figured she wouldn't stoop that low. "You may be a potions master but you don't have a monopoly on cooking you know!" She continued. Eventually the only way he could discover to calm her was to agree to eat Pumpkin Pie and Banana Bum-buns until he popped.
He searched his robe pocket for something, anything to make this less annoying. Hype – he'd found the solution. He slipped some into Molly's drink and then some into his own. Soon after they were both spouting complete rubbish and giggling oddly together.
What happened next I cannot say since the parameters of Fanfiction.net do not allow me to explore such perversions.
Original Consequences
Severus Snape [okay it's getting obsessive – so sue me!]
Molly Weasley [get a hold of yourself you're a married woman!]
Floating down easy street on the lilo of life.
"I told you before I despise your cooking! Now quit hounding me you old bat! *Glares* "Really - I'm warning you! Stop it. NO!"
"God Damn is your ass hot! Did I ever tell you your ass was hot, because your ass is HOT!"
She chased him around with a frying pan. "How dare you insult my cooking you monster!" She wailed – he cowered under a chair.
They had a feast of pumpkin pie and banana bum-buns, they got high on hype and spent the rest of the night giggling oddly together. – The rest is censored because fanfiction.net is just too kiddie now.
