I'll tell you guys something. NOTHING amuses me more then a newbie story. NOTHING. They're hilarious. So, with great pleasure, I present: DJEagel's Wacky Wonderful Nutty Newbie Spoof Stories! Each Chapter will be a spoof of an overused FanFiction subject, written (badly) by me, put through the AOLer translator, (Which you can find here: so that it's basically a newbie story! I can guarantee you'll laugh, I can guarantee you'll like it, but most of all, I can guarantee it's 110% shite! Enjoy!
The first story is here, a spoof of 'New Animorph' stories.
Expect to see one weekly! (Or whenever I get off my fat ass and can be bothered to write one.
DA NU ANIMORPH
QUIK1!1!! OMG LOL SADE JAEK RUN!!11! WTF LOL DA ANIMORPHS RAN OUT OF DA YERK POL AS FAST AS THAY CAN WIT VIS3R 3 RUNNG AFT3R TH3M SAYNG AHAHAHA IL GET U1!1! WTF SUDENLY CHAPMAN CAELD HIM BAK SO H3 L3FT111! OMG WTF LOL THAN ANIMORPHS RAN OUT OF MCDONALDZ HAY L3TS D3MORPH IN THIS ALEY MARCO SADE SO THAY RAN 2 TEH AL3Y AND WHIEL THAY WERA DEMORPHNG AH11111!!1 OMG WTF LOL THEY TURNAD AROUND AND SAW A GIRL WHO FANET3D
THEY!1!1!!!! OMG LOL W3R3 AT TEH BARN CASEI THROUGH W8R ON DA GIRL AND SHA WOKE UP WHO R U R3CHAL ASK3D!!11!1 WTF LOL IM CAL3D CHARLENE TEH GIRL SADE OF SADE 2BIAS HI CHARLANE HI SHA SADE THEN SH3 LOKED AT MARCO AND THOUGHT HES PR3TY
SO!11111! Y WER3 U GUYS LOKIN WEIRD EARLEIR SHE ASK3D111!1!1! WTF LOL WEL WARE ANIMORPHGS W3 FIGHT DA YERKS JAEK SADE WT YERKS CHARL3NE ASKAD TH3YRE EVIL ALEINS WHO TAEK OV3R UR BRIAN N CONTROL U1!!1!! OMG LOL WE TURN IN2 ANIMALS AND FIGHT THEM COL CHARLAN3 SADE
DO!1!1!!! OMG WTF U WANA B AN ANIMORPH AX ASK3D H3R ITS A BIG ST3P AND U HAEV 2 LEI A LOT BUT CHARL3NE SADE YAS IF I CAN SAEV TEH WORLD K THEN MARCO SADE WE NED 2 GET U SOME MORPHS BUT FIRST 2UCH THIS BOX SHA DID OW TAHT WAS TNGLY SH3 SADE NOW 2UCH THIS BIRD N THINK ABOUT IT SHE DID AND SUD3NLY SHE WAS TURNNG IN2 A BIRD COL SHE THOUGHT IT IS INT IT CASEI SADE HOWD U HAAR TAHT SHE ASKAD U USAD THOUGHT SPECH W3 AL USA IT!1!!111! OMG WTF O K SH3 SADE
LATER!1111!1 DIS IN IN CHARL3N3S POINT OF VEW NOW
WE WANT 2 DA GARDENS AND GOT A LOAD OF COL MORPHS AND SOM3 HNGY CAL3D 3RAK 2LD US WE HAD 2 GO AND FIGHT VISER 3 IN TEH YERK POL 2MOROW AND HA IS A YERK L3AEDR AND HES EVIL1!111 LOL I W3NT 2 MARCOS HOUS3M THO AND WENT IN2 HIS BDR2M HE WAS WATHCNG TV HI MARCO IS 3D HI CHERLEN3 HA SED BAK MARCO I LOVA U I SADE I LOV3 U 2 HE SADE AND W3 START3D KISNG WE KISED FGOR AN HOUR AND TH3N I WENTY BAK 2 MAH HOUSE
NEXT11!1111 LOL DAY
WE WER3 IN MCDONALDS HAY PARSN AT TEH TIL RACHAL SADE WE WANT HAPY MEALS WIT EXTRA HAPY K TEH TIL P3RSON SADE TEH YERK ENTRANCE IS NOW OPEN K THANX 2BIAS SADE1!1! OMG WTF WA WANT IN AND WHIEL WA W3RE GONG DOWN TEH STARES W3 MORPHED IN2 OUT BATLE MORPHS MIEN WAS A L3PORD AND VISAR THRE SAW US AND SADE I WIL KIL UI AND I WAS SCAERD BUT I STIL FOUGHT I KILAD 50 HORK BAJIR AND THEN ANIKOPRHS KIL3D EV3RYTHNG ELSE AND THEY AL GOT INJURAD AND IT WAS JUST M3 AND VIS3R 3 HA TRYD 2 SLASH MA WIT HIS TAYL BUT H3 MISED AND I CLAEWDE HIS S2MAC AND HE SADE OW AND FAL DOWN THEN I SLIT HIS THROAT AND HA WAS DAAD ANDF DA YERK INVASION WAS OVERAND WA WER3 H3ROS ASPECIALY ME AND AL TEH YERKS IN DA WORLD GOT KILAD AND TAHTS TEH END BYA!!!!!!11!!!11!1!1!111!1!!1!!!111!!1!1!111111!!!!!1!1!111!1!!!!1!1!!!!!!1!!11!!1!
There you go. A newbie story. Full of errors, painful to read, and it basically has everything that you'd expect! Look out for the next instalment: A #54 continuation!
Ciao!
~DJ Eagel.
