Title: End of Innocence, Beginnings of Turmoil
Chapter I "Broken Pieces of Hearts and Vows"
Author: Ethne (ImaginaryGirl6@aol.com)
Date Started On: 4/29/02 (Yeah, I know, I started this a long time ago, but I had dificulties getting past certain parts)
Rating: R (For violence, death, and adult topics, if this bothers you, you don't have to read it. -.-)

_________________________________________________________________________________________
"There is no longer a way out of our present situation except by forging a road toward our
objective, violently and by force, over a sea of blood and under a horizon blazing with fire."
-Gamal Abdel Nasser
_________________________________________________________________________________________



The man with long black hair stood before the violet-eyed rurouni in the clearing of the forest. The man's name
was Aku. He, as many before him, had wanted to fight the legendary Hitokiri Battousai. He had taken Kamiya Kaoru,
and done something to her, only Aku knew what exactly that was. The rurouni's name was Himura Kenshin, the fiery
red head with a cross scar on his cheek was once the feared Battousai, now he stood preparing to fight for Kaoru
once more, with his sakabatou in hand. Aku prepared himself to attack, unsheathing his sword with a cold smile and
an equally icy chuckle.
"Battousai, I wonder about that woman.... She was very pretty, and she seemed so smart... But, she kept crying out
your name... Only, she didn't call you Battousai. I wonder if she even knew." Aku whispered just loud enough for
Kenshin to hear. Kenshin's eyes narrowed into slits as he noted the past tense in the man's voice, he held his
sakabatou straight ahead of him, he too was preparing to attack. The violet eyes of the normally peaceful man burned
with the dark fire of hatred, his grip on the hilt tightening as he gritted his teeth.
"You know you can't kill me with that blade, don't you?" Aku asked, his wicked smile growing larger. The dark
clouds above flashed with lightening and roared with the angry thunder to follow, for a moment the clearing was
illuminated.
"What did you do to her, Aku?" Kenshin whispered in a deadly voice his eyes flashing amber.
"Nothing you wouldn't have done to her. She would have ended up just as that other woman had, since a killer
must always kill." Aku said with a cold glint in his eyes as he leapt toward the rurouni, his blade aimed straight
ahead, straight as Kenshin's throat, Kenshin dodged at the last possible instant, not escaping the blade entirely and
ending up with a long gash along the right side of his neck.
Without saying a word farther, Kenshin leapt up high into the sky, he prepared to bring the blade down on
Aku's head which held his twisted mind. Kenshin followed through with his Hiten Mitsurgi Ryu, Ryu Tsui Sen, but
at the last moment, he flipped the blade. The large man's head was hit with the blow in which his skull would have
been damaged if he had been with the proper side of the sakabatou, but instead the blade cut through him easily. He
fell forward, eyes vacant with death.

centeriA hitokiri is a hitokiri until death..../i/center

Kenshin stood, frozen, as he recalled the words of a previous foe, Jin'e. Each word echoed in his mind until it all
mixed together in a large, clouded mask, covering his thoughts.

"Kenshi-" Kaoru, the raven haired sensei of the art of Kamiya Kassihn Ryuu ran toward the clearing when she
saw her kind savior, her voice caught in her throat painfully as she spotted the body of Aku. Aku's blood seeped into
the green earth from both his body, and also from Kenshin's sword as the liquid slowly fell from the metal. Kenshin's
face was a mask of no emotion, he hadn't heard Kaoru. Her eyes were wide with shock and horror as she looked at
the disturbing scene. The peaceful rurouni that she knew had sworn never to kill again, stood with a bloodied sword
in his hand and a body at his feet. Lightening flashed once more, followed by a mournful cry of thunder again as the
lightening only made the scene clearer to Kaoru, making it become embedded in her eternal memory. Rain poured
down all around them now, it soaked everyone and everything within seconds, but no one present cared.

Kenshin's grip on his sword loosened and he dropped the tool of death, and his knees gave way beneath him so
he fell to the ground, covering his face with his hands as the hot tears of regret rushed down his face. The Hitokiri
Battousai had killed again. Kenshin's body was wracked with vicious sobs for Aku's death, his own soul, and for
Kaoru... Kaoru... the only one who Kenshin prayed for that really mattered to him. It was because of him that she was
probably gone forever. Kenshin's hands fell from his face as he raised his eyes to the lightening and rain, an
anguished cry erupted from the broken man's throat as the cold rain washed away the blood from his skin.

For the first time since she had broken free of the ropes, Kaoru took notice the many wounds that the ropes
and that man had made, along with her bare, bleeding feet from running in the thick forest, a slash in her arm from
where he had taken a dagger to her, and so many bruises all over body. Her lovely kimono was ruined, but none of it
mattered to her as it had when the wounds were acquired. Her own tears stung her scraped cheeks as they ran down
her face, she heard Kenshin's cry, and wanted to run to him, to comfort him. But she couldn't. He had killed, and
now she was afraid of that part of him. He hadn't been able to control it, and who knew when he could loose control
of the Battousai again. Kaoru turned, and ran. She ran from her protector, the one who had saved her many times, the
one she loved, and the one she now feared when she ran from Kenshin.

Kenshin hugged himself as he mourned her death and shivered from the cold as the wind blew viciously.
Finally after about an hour, Kenshin stood, he couldn't be in this clearing of blood any longer. He had to get away.
iI'll return to the dojo tonight and collect my belongings, then I will write a note to Yahiko and Sanosuke and
leave./i Kenshin told himself mentally. He began to run in the direction of the Kamiya dojo, his heart in chaos
with the many emotions that coursed through him.
He closed his eyes tightly as he ran, not caring if he ran into the trees, or the small river not far from the clearing.
It hardly even mattered now. Kenshin's foot made contact with something warm and soft as he tripped over it, his
eyes opening wide when he heard a groan. Lightening illuminated everything again, and Kenshin saw what it was he
had tripped over. "K-Kaoru-dono!" He yelped in surprise as he knelt down beside her, checking for her pulse and
finding one. Relief flooded through Kenshin until he noticed the many cuts and bruises that were upon her body. She
was shivering badly and so he picked her up and held her close to him as he began to run faster than before towards
the dojo.
"Kensh....in.....why....?" The half-conscious girl in his arms mumbled as she closed her eyes, loosing all awareness
of the world around her. That question was like a dagger into Kenshin's heart the way she had spoken it. It held such
fear and such sadness.


"Yahiko! Sanosuke! Someone!" Kenshin cried out when he reached the Kamiya's entrance gates. The rain was
pouring down harder now, and it was very difficult to see. Kenshin called out the same three words again and again
until finally someone heard him over the rain and came running. Sanosuke ran out into the rain and took Kaoru from
Kenshin; who was feeling tired and weak. Kenshin stumbled as he tried to follow Sanosuke inside, causing Sanosuke
to pause and see if Kenshin wanted help. "Take care of Kaoru-dono first, I'll be fine..." Kenshins would whisper
softly every time. Sanosuke finally listened and went ahead of Kenshin to Kaoru's room, he rolled out her futon and
laid her on it.
"Please, Sanosuke, go get Megumi-dono." Kenshin said in a hushed voice as he stumbled into the room.
Sanosuke nodded and left quickly, breaking into a run as soon as he was out of the room. Kenshin fell to his knees
next to the futon, his energy was spent. "Sessha is sorry, Kaoru-dono. Sessha didn't mean to. Please forgive sessha,
although sessha is not worth your forgiveness..." Kenshin spoke as he stared down at Kaoru, his eyes painfully filled
with tears. "Please don't make sessha leave, sessha wants to stay.... please, Kaoru-dono.... please....." The tears
spilled out of the violet eyes as they closed and he fell forward, his head resting on the edge of Kaoru's futon.



Megumi ran into the room followed by Sanosuke when no reply was heard by either Kenshin or Kaoru. They
hadn't expected a sound from the tired Yahiko; who had gone to bed early after training so hard that afternoon in
preparation for rescuing his sensei. Megumi looked at Kaoru, to Kenshin, to Sanosuke. "What happened?" She asked
finally, observing the long streaks of tears that still continued to fall from Kenshin's eyes as he slept. "Sessha... is
sorry...." He mumbled unhappily as his expression tightened into that of pain. "I don't know..." Sanosuke sighed as
he, too, watched Kenshin. Something horrible must have happened, but what? Megumi looked back at Kaoru and
nodded, "We should treat Ken-san first, then Kaoru." She said, a grim expression on her face. Sanosuke nodded and
grabbed Kenshin's wrists, he then started to drag him to the corner of the room where he had laid down some
blankets in a make-shift bed. Kenshin's eyes slowly opened and in one movement he worked himself free of
Sanosuke's grasp. Sanosuke was obviously surprised as he turned around and faced Kenshin who was sitting with his
legs crossed on the wooden floor, his face cast down.
"Kenshin, what happened?" Sanosuke asked at last as he took in the sight of the broken Rurouni. "It is not
important, that it's not." He replied, still looking down at the floor. His eyes were hidden beneath his wild red hair,
"Kaoru-dono is what is important." The man on the floor continued in a soft voice, hardly loud enough to be called a
whisper.
"Ken-san, you're hurt. We have to treat you first since your wound is move serious than half of Kaoru's."
Megumi spoke in a soothing, yet still insisting tone.
"Iie. Megumi-dono, treat Kaoru-dono first." A sharp note in Kenshin's otherwise soft voice startled both
Megumi and Sanosuke. Megumi gave Kenshin a worried look and finally said after several minutes of silence,
"Fine." Her tone was icy and she didn't bother to mask her hate for the idea of not treating the person who needed it
most right now. Megumi turned away from him and told Sanosuke to help her treat, and dress, the wounds of the
teacher of the Kamiya Kasshin Ryuu. Kenshin got up and left the room silently, no one noticed him leave until the
soft tap of the wooden shouji hitting the wooden frame softly was heard. Megumi look up and mumbled something
that resembled a prayer for mercy from God under her breath.

Kenshin walked slowly out of the dojo, his mind clouded with his dark thoughts and his face set in a grim
expression. A man was dead, and a sword had been covered in the dead man's crimson blood. This in its self was
horrible news to Kenshin, what made it all unbearable was the fact that the man who held the sword had been
himself. As he slid open the shouji that lead to the courtyard, the cold, bitter wind rushed at Kenshin. He closed it
once more as he stepped out. As he descended the stairs, he sighed deeply. His clothing was already drenched, so he
saw no reason to be concerned at all as he hopped up onto the roof silently. With quiet steps Kenshin walked on the
middle of the roof until he stood by the chimney of the kitchen, this spot, he knew, could not be seen from the
ground. Not wanting to be disturbed by anyone, he sat in that spot, his back leaning against the chimey. He removed
his sakabatou's sheath from his clothing and stared at it for a long moment. It's metal was cool to the touch, and just
as wet as he was.
It was strange to think that the blade that it had once held was to prevent the Battousai from killing again, and yet
it hadn't done that this night. His grip tight on the sheath, knuckles white, Kenshin threw it in frustration. He never
wanted that sheath, or the blade that he had left in the woods, near him again. The rurouni leaned his head back
against the chimney and closed his eyes as he remember what had happened to start this entire thing.....

iThe day was young, the sun had only been up for a couple of hours and the market was full with the towns
people of Tokyo. Kenshin walked down the street that was filled with people who were debating prices, meeting
friends, shopping or perhaps just enjoying the sounds of life around them. He was part of the group that was
shopping in the crowded market. His shopping list was repeating in his mind as he mumbled it allowed, being sure
he wouldn't forget anything. A smile played on his lips as he watched the people who milled about the crowded
street. A dark gray cloud here and there were the only signs of the storm to approaching fast, and no one really
took them to be a threat. Kenshin's shopping was nearly done already, he just had to pick up a few more things and
he would be able to go back to the dojo and prepare lunch for the master of the art, and the student. Kenshin was
willing to bet that a certain man who wore the sign of evil on his back would come by tonight as well, seeing as he
always did to enjoy a free meal.
Kenshin paused when he heard someone running in his direction, they were calling out as well, yelling at the
people around to move. Kenshin turned just as the footsteps halted behind him and he found the one who had ran
looking for him was Yahiko. "Kenshin... I was... attacked... he took.... Busu...." Yahiko spoke in short gasps as he
tried to catch his breath, although he wasn't given a chance to continue as Kenshin's eyes narrowed. "Who?" He
demanded as he glared at no one in particular, his eyes flashing dangerously to amber and back to violet. Yahiko
shuddered at the glare Kenshin wore and took note of his eye color. "A man named Aku, he said that he knew you
from the Bakumatsu." Kenshin's eyes widened as the face of the man he had been assigned to kill, but had failed to
do so flashed through his mind. He was the only man who the Battousai had been sent after and had actually lived.
He cursed himself mentally for letting the man go free with only an injury to his left side. He should have just killed
the man.... But at the time, he hadn't been able to. Aku had managed to do quite a bit of damage to Kenshin, it was
a surpirse that he had lived through it. Kenshin's hand subconsciously levitated over the hilt of his sword, which
hung at his side as it always had. "Go back to the dojo and stay there. I'll return later tonight." Kenshin had
commanded of the boy. Yahiko's eyes widened as he heard the command, it was not the usual request from the shy
rurouni, but an order from the Battousai that was hidden always within Himura Kenshin. Yahiko nodded quickly to
acknowledge the order and then ran back to the dojo. Kenshin left, the groceries forgotten, for the forest where he
could have finished Aku off so many years ago, and avoided this entire thing. Aku used to rape so many women, he
had been a government official, but had little regards for the law before, during, and probably after, the entire
conflict had begun. Kenshin had been told to kill this man because he had abducted, raped, and murdered an
Inishin official's daughter..../i

"Kaoru-dono.... What did he do to you....?" Kenshin whispered to no one but the sky as the image of her battered
form ran through his mind once more. Anger followed by pain, followed by sorrow and finally followed by an
overwhelming guilt flooded his body as he listened to nothing more than the rain falling rhythmically on the wet
ground and roof. His thoughts he blocked out, wanting desperately to just forget this night had ever happened.
Wanting something he knew could never be.



Megumi sat back on her heels after she tied the last bandage, she looked down at the still unconscious girl and a
soft, sad, smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. If it hadn't been for this girl, Kenshin would have just passed
through Tokyo, he never would have stayed to save a young boy from lies. Never would have stayed to save a young
man from memories, and never would have stayed long enough to save a doctor's daughter from herself. Sanosuke
looked over at Megumi and asked in a hushed voice, "What are you smiling about? Do you see what I see or not?"
His face was that of anger as he glared at the woman before him who dared to smile. She remained silent and her
smile faded a bit as she got up and went across the room, towards the paper and wood door, she picked up her
medical bag as she did so.
"I'm going to go treat Ken-san." She spoke. Sanosuke shook his head in frustration. "Don't, he wouldn't let
you earlier, and he probably won't let you now." Megumi glared at him, "Just tell me where he is." Sanosuke gave
her his reply as he shook his head once more, "I don't know where he is." Megumi left the room and started to search
for the man who needed treatment.
Frustrated with this whole night, Sanosuke wished he had a person there he could take his anger out on. He
wished he had answers to the many questions that his mind was asking. They were all on the tip of his tongue, but
not one could be answered by anyone in the room. Only Kenshin could answer them, and though Sanosuke knew
where the rurouni probably was, he thought it best to leave him be. He had lied to the doctor because he knew that
Kenshin wouldn't let Megumi, or anyone, treat him. Kenshin needed time to himself. Sanosuke the left the room
about twenty minutes after Megumi's last cries for Kenshin had died down and she finally left, he didn't hear
Kaoru's words, and he should have been pleased that this key to the great secret of what had happened out in the
night, this stormy night, would be kept a secret until later....

iAku loomed over her, a cold smile plastered to his face as he looked down at the young girl who he had
expertly tied up to a tree in this clearing. The sun was high in the sky and he could see every detail of the girl fully.
Kaoru shuddered and fought down the urg to whimper, he wouldn't be given the satisfaction. She bit her bottom lip
as her kimono was torn from her body savagely, and the bindings on her chest undone. She felt his hands on her
body, pressing hard, bruising her skin. She kicked him as best as she could, not caring where, so long as it hurt
him. Aku yelped in surprise and growled in anger as he pulled out a dagger. "Naughty, naughty..." He whispered
as he sliced into her arm. "Now..." He mumbled as he continued on with the girl who's arm bled from a dagger,
and lips bled from her own doing. The man had undressed and now stood over her once more. He chuckled as he
kissed her lips hard, and tasted her blood. Kaoru then felt herself be positioned and thought tearfully to herself,
'No... Please... Kenshin, hurry! Please don't!' She yelled out in pain as the man did what he wished with her./i

The memory plagued Kaoru's dreams as she slept that night, she was sweating coldly, though she had a high fever.
Her skin was very pale, even pale enough to rival the snow white bandages that covered her body. Kaoru screamed
out as she recalled how painful it had all been, how rough he had been. "Kenshin... You're too late...." She mumbled
to herself sleepily as she turned to her side and whimpered in pain.

Kenshin was still perched outside on the roof of the dojo, his eyes were still closed. It was fast becoming
morning and the rain had stopped only about a hour ago. He hadn't moved from his seat and still mentally yelled at
himself for all of this. His eyes snapped open as he heard her scream, rising, Kenshin jumped down from the roof in
a graceful motion, landing perfectly on his feet. He promtly ran to the room where Kaoru slept, and not bothering to
knock, he opened the door and saw her, she had turned over onto her side and he heard her whimper in pain.
"K-Kaoru-dono?" Kenshin whispered softly, trying to be sure if she was awake or not. Her body stiffened at his voice
and a fresh pang of guilt, shame, and sorrow stabbed into Kenshin's heart. He heard the footsteps coming down the
hall long before he saw the person. Yahiko came running down, his hair tasseled from the hours of sleep, and a look
of panic on his face. Taking one long glance at Kaoru, Kenshin shook his head, water dripped from his bangs and
clothes as he did so.
"Kaor- Kenshin! Daijobou? How's Kaoru?" The young boy inquired as he reached the room. Kenshin looked from
Yahiko to Kaoru three times before his eyes finally met with Yahiko's. "How I am does not matter, it does not.
Kaoru-dono, though, I do not know..."
"Arigatou, Kenshin." Yahiko said, smiling a lopsided smile to the violet eyed man before him. Kenshin's eyes
widened as he heard these words and was about to tell Yahiko he did not deserve his thanks when Yahiko stopped
him, "You saved Kaoru. Don't tell her, but I would really miss the Busu if she wasn't here anymore." Yahiko winked
and Kenshin looked away as he felt the blood run down his hands again, even though it had been washed away by the
rain long ago. "No, don't thank me Yahiko.... If you knew... God if you knew you would hate me...." Kenshin
whispered as he turned and walked toward his room, images of his days as a hitokiri and the last twenty four hours
running through his mind painfully.
Kenshin could practically hear the blood drip off of his hands and into a puddle at his feet. The warm
feeling of the liquid becoming as if it would burn him. He could see the trail that was left behind behind him.
Perhaps.... Perhaps this would be what drove him mad.... His broken vow and the blood spilled onto a rurouni's
hands...

"Kenshin, your neck... You should ask Megumi to look at that." Yahiko called after the man he looked up to.
Kenshin hardly heard the boy. He was too lost in his memories. He heard, and felt, every one of the deaths he caused.
He heard their apologies to their families, their curses to the Battousai, he felt their pain in their hearts, in their body
where the hitokiri's sword and slashed away at their tender flesh.
Staggering, only a couple of steps into his room, Kenshin took two more steps, and finally collapsed once more
as the pain of the memories overwhelmed him. "Sessha is so sorry, mina..." Darkness enveloped him....

uiHi! My name's Ethne, please excuse and errors that are in the story itself. I've seen only a few eps, and
read a couple of the manga, this is the first RK fic I have ever written, but is the third to be posted. It's obvious by
how many mistakes I have in this fic that I don't own Rurouni Kenshin, the show/books, belong to many companies
who I envy greatly. Well.... This isn't completed, yet, but I'll try to get it up soon! Ja Ne!
Note: Do you think this chapter is too long? Should I break it up into smaller sections?

Sessha- "This unworthy one" or- an incrediably humble was of saying 'I'

Mina- Everyone

Hitokiri- Assassin

Battousai- Nickname given to Kenshin in the Bakumatsu

Bakumatsu- The time between the end of the Edo Dynasty, and the start of the Meiji era/u/i

Iie- No

Daijobou- Are you all right?

-dono- A suffix used on the end of someone's name to show great respect. Even in the Meiji era, using this term was
outdated.

-san- A suffix used at the end of someone's name as a sign of honor, though not as great as -sama (lord/lordess) or
-dono

Ken-san- Megumi's nickname for Kenshin, I think I heard that Megumi gave the name to Kenshin to show that
Kenshin was different to her than he was to Kaoru, or something like that.

Ja Ne- See Ya

dojo- a school, usually a school of kendo or martial arts

Sensei- Teacher

Kamiya Kasshin Ryuu- Budo formed by Kaoru's father