The Way Things Were

ALL STANDARD DISCLAIMERS APPPLY.

The Way Things Were

Chapter 4

Duchess Celena walked around the spacious leviship, staring out the windows at the landscape below them. Her delicate fingers entwined her jade necklace* subconsciously. She didn't know when she got the necklace, or even where and how. She had missed many years in her life from the time when she was young until she was 15. She hadn't known what had happened to her; all she remembered between her childhood and teenage years was exiting a damaged guymelef wearing armor with the crest of another country on it. She didn't understand it at all, and all her brother told her was that she had been taken away from him and used as their pawn. He never elaborated what he meant by 'used as their pawn,' and looked very distressed when the subject was brought up. Allen had promised she'd never be taken away from him again, that she would never be alone. Celena, being the loving sister she was, didn't have the heart to pry about the matter and took his word for it.

This was the last day of their trip; they were scheduled to arrive in Fanelia in a couple of hour's time, hopefully to make it in time for lunch. Celena was also going to join in at the big celebrations honouring the princess Varie's 20th birthday. She could not believe how fast the years had gone by. It seemed only yesterday the little princess was sitting in her lap and enjoying picnics with her; now she was all grown up. The trip meant a lot to her; she had treated the Fanelian princess like a niece, and was glad to be able to see her again, along with her long-time friends. The fact she missed a few day's worth of paperwork was an added bonus.

Walking past the melef hangar, a jolt was sent through her bones. She stopped walking, and the rhythmic sound of her shoes against the metal floor faded and died. There was nothing there, just some plain guymelefs along with her brother's Sherezade. He had been in a rush to get to Fanelia earlier than the predetermined time, so he had taken the fastest possible leviship. Unfortunately the leviship did not have a melef hangar, and although parting with his melef was something her brother disliked to do, he didn't have much of a choice.

It's that feeling again, Celena thought with despair. Why do I always get that feeling around guymelefs?

She clenched her fists, and her hands trembled slightly. For the past 20 years of her life she had been getting this feeling, as if an urge inside her wanted to run to those guymelefs and battle in them. Sometimes, she acted without knowing what she was doing. She lost control, and it was as if another force propelled her movements. But for the moment, she forced herself to turn around and walk away. Hesitantly, her body obeyed her commands, and she pivoted on her foot, smacking right into a person.

At first she had thought that it was her husband Dryden, but on a second look found that it was not Dryden at all.

"Are you alright, Duchess?" he asked inquisitively.

"Y-yes, thank you, Gaddess," her voice wavered ever so slightly.

Why does brother have to request that he accompany me on every trip? She mentally pleaded.

Before she had married Dryden, she had met Gaddess. He was considerate, charming, kind, and soon their friendship had developed into something more.  Much more. Gaddess, after they had been seeing each other for a while, was prepared to marry her, to propose and ask her to become his wife. Celena had been thrilled, but she couldn't find the words to say. When she finally did find them, she found that she was turning down his proposal, refusing the one thing she had been dreaming of ever since she had met him.

That was the one thing she had hated herself for doing, but she didn't really think she had done that. The force within her was stirring at the time, and it had pushed away her chance of happiness with Gaddess. Every time she tried to talk to him afterward, he would seem different, detached. Never again did he call her Celena; never again did he tease her or talk to her. She missed his warmth, his companionship. But he would not talk to her without the title, always calling her 'Duchess' instead of by her name. Her brother hadn't known of their relationship, and for his sake they had stayed friends and upon speaking terms with each other, although every time she talked to him she would notice the sadness in those eyes. He always looked at her as if she had lied and betrayed him, and he would keep looking at her like that forevermore.

She looked up, only to be met by those sad eyes. To anyone else, he seemed indifferent, but she could see past his disguise. She wanted to say something to him, wanted to comfort him. But the force would not relinquish, and she found herself powerless to stop it.

Why do I care? Celena asked herself. Do I still love him? Is there any chance that he could still love me?

He had taken her hand now, and kissed the back of it softly. Shivers ran up and down her spine, a tickling sensation covering her all over. She didn't understand why she reacted the way she did to his touch. Just being next to him was enough to make her heart pound.

"What would you be doing around here at this time of day, Duchess?" his solemn voice broke her thoughts.

Quietly, she tried to answer his question without getting tongue-tied.

"I was… awake… so I decided to walk around a bit. Somehow, I ended up here," she finished truthfully.

"Ah… I see," he replied in almost a monotone voice, turning his gaze to look up at the resting giants. She observed him as he observed the guymelefs.

His features had hardly changed, and neither did his personality. He was in charge of the Imperial Asturian Leviship Fleet, but he was also captain to the Contender, a leviship her brother had bestowed upon him. He seemed to look upon the melefs with trust and respect, especially when his gaze was fixed on Sherezade. Her guess was he admired the melef as much as he admired her brother.

Something in his eyes changed at that instant, and she heard him heave a sigh. Then he suddenly turned toward her, stepping closer so that they were merely inches apart. He looked straight into her eyes, and his hands held her own.

"Duchess…."

She cringed that he had called her Duchess again, but was surprised at the tenderness in his voice. He seemed to want to say more, but the words never came. Inside her, she was pleading for him to continue, to tell her he loved her. The confession never came, and she found that tears were starting to form behind her eyes.

Oh god, don't cry, she told herself. Don't cry.

She tried to blink the tears back, and was almost successful except for a single teardrop rolling down her cheek. She felt his rough hands cup her cheeks, and wipe away the tear. She tried to smile, but found that she could not do anything on her accord. For a moment, time stopped, and in a world outside of time she dreamt that they were together. Together, flying high above the clouds. Her vision was a wonderful picture, a picture of her deepest desires. It was all so perfect, and it would've stayed that way had it not been for a little voice in her subconscious, a little voice reminding her of reality and the truth.

You're married to Dryden, it said, in a mocking tone.

At that she pulled back, putting a more appropriate space between them. His eyes reverted back to the isolated ones they had been, instead of the kind and loving ones she had stared into moments ago. Taking a deep breath, she once again tried to speak.

"G-Gaddess… I…." She stuttered violently, and couldn't get past the 'I' in her sentence. Deciding she'd try again, she took another deep breath, and this time, spoke in a calm voice.

"Gaddess, I—"

"Celena!" came a call across the corridor.

The two instantly sprang apart, and both turned to see who had called out to them. They saw a figure with shoulder-length brown hair walking toward them, his usual Duke attire in place.

"So this is where you came to," he said when her reached Celena.

"Dryden," she affirmed his presence softly. He flashed her a 'charming' smile, and she lowered her eyes. Then he turned his attention to Gaddess.

"How long until we reach Fanelia, captain?" he asked, not inquiring at all why his wife was with her ex-boyfriend in a deserted guymelef hangar.

Gaddess, visibly relieved, saluted the Duke and answered his question.

"Two hours at the maximum, highness," he replied, trying to keep the bitterness out of his voice.

"Very well; carry on, captain," he dismissed, and with that he led Celena away, walking in the direction of the main chambers.

***************

Varie woke the next morning to the sound of singing birds and purring. The curtains swung happily in the breeze blowing in through the balcony doors that had been left open. Dazedly, she opened her eyes to be staring back at a pair of yellowish-hazel cat ones.

"Aaah!" Varie screamed out of fright.

"Not so loud," Mattie hissed. "Do you want to get me in trouble?"

"What are you doing in my room at…" Varie glanced toward her balcony to look at her sundial, but found that it was very dark outside, the sky being gloomy and grey.

"Very early in the morning," she complained, burying her face in her pillow.

"I'm sorry, Princess, but don't be fooled by the gloomy sky. It's almost nine o'clock."

This statement woke Varie up.

"NINE O'CLOCK!?" She immediately jumped out of bed, and rushed toward her bathroom. She knew she didn't have time for a bath, so she quickly washed her face and brushed her teeth, before heading to her closet to pick out an outfit. After 'careful' consideration, Varie settled on a blue satin dress, with low v-cut neckline and five slits in the sleeves. Only as she started to change did she realize the reason Mattie was looking at her strangely, for she was still wearing the trousers and shirt from last night when she had gone to visit Himitsu. She knew she wouldn't be able to explain, but her mind was racing for an excuse to give to her friend, even though she hated having to lie.

"I… I… couldn't sleep last night…"

Good start, Varie thought to herself. That part was true; she really did have trouble sleeping.

"So I went and trained a bit to relax, and I guessed I must've been so tired I didn't even bother to take these dirty things off," she tried to laugh, but it sounded forced somehow. Her hands were by her sides guiltily, and that was when she felt something poke at her. Her curiosity got the better of her, and she reached into her pocket and pulled out… a feather. Then it struck her that she was going to give the feather to Himitsu the night before, but since the dragon had marched off on her she didn't get the chance. Mattie was peering at her accusingly, and when she pulled out the feather, her eyes held disappointment.

"Varie, you didn't," she said softly, pleadingly. "Tell me you didn't go flying last night."

Varie almost couldn't hear the last words, for they were spoken so softly. She didn't understand why her friend cared so much that she had gone flying; it wasn't as if she were so careless as to let someone see her.

"Relax, Mattie. No one saw me. Seriously, you're starting to sound like Father," she said, while turning around for her friend to do up the buttons on the back of her dress as she did up her hair.

"You shouldn't do that anymore, Varie," Mattie said while she worked. When she was done, she spun Varie around to face her.

"Promise me you won't do that again," she said, grabbing her friend's shoulders.

"There is no way I'm giving up flying. It's what I do to relax; I can't do anything else!" Varie retorted, after she had elegantly put her hair in a bun and brushed a stray strand of hair from her face.

"It's not safe…" Mattie whispered, but was interrupted by a knock on the door. Before Varie could ask what she meant by that, Mattie shook her shoulders firmly.

"Promise me," she pleaded determinedly.

"But I—"

"PROMISE ME!" she almost shouted, but lowered her voice when she remembered there was a presence outside the door. Another knock confirmed that.

"Just a minute!" Varie called to the visitor. Then, in an undertone, whispered to her friend, "Leave now, unless you want to get in trouble!"

"I'm not going anywhere until you promise!" the cat-girl hissed back.

"Princess, are you alright in there?" a muffled male voice called through the door.

"Yes, I'm fine," she shouted back. "I'll be there in a second."

"Promise me. Please," was Mattie's last stab at getting the headstrong girl to promise.

Sighing dejectedly, Varie reluctantly agreed.

"Ok, you win. I promise. Now go before you get in trouble!"

The cat-girl didn't need telling twice. She got down on all fours, and ran toward the balcony. Standing up on the railing, she was gone in the blink of an eye. Varie quickly ran to the door, smoothed out the crinkles in her dress, took a deep breath and put on a fake smile, then opened the door.

Standing outside was Prince Gabriel, looking very handsome in his blue Asturian court attire. He wore a long-sleeved navy-blue shirt, topped with an armoured vest emblazoned with the Asturian crest. His trousers were tucked into his knee-high black boots, his sword swinging happily in its sheath attached to his belt. A long navy-blue cape flowing to the floor finished the look, making him look very majestic.

"Sorry to disturb you, Princess," he said, bowing deeply. "But I was wondering if I could have the honour of escorting you down to breakfast?"

Varie was surprised at him; he definitely wasn't the little brat she remembered. He was very polite and gentlemanly, and he really was sort of cute. She gawked at herself for thinking such a thing, but remembered that he had asked her a question that she had not answered yet.

"I'd be delighted," she said with a genuine smile. He offered her his arm, and she hooked her hand into his. As she closed the door behind her, she had the strangest feeling that she had forgotten something. Dismissing the thought, she allowed herself to be led down the stone corridor to the dining hall for breakfast.

***************

*The jade necklace Celena is wearing is the one Dilandau wore. You can see it when he rips his shirt in episode… 19, I think.

Author's Notes: Sorry it took me so long to get this chapter out! Please forgive me!!! I've been really busy, really I have!

Sorry to cut this chapter here, but I felt it was a good place to stop. Something's gonna happen in the next chapter that will give you a more… broad picture of the story. I'm planning a MAJOR plot twist. Oops, ok, I never said that. Erase that out of your memories!!!

Meghanna Starsong, thank you so much for your constant advice and support. You're the best! If anyone else is reading this, PLEASE review. Right now I don't think this story is worth continuing to write because no one seems to be reading it. It would mean soooooo much to me to get just ONE review. If you think I should keep writing this story, please say so.

Anyways, please review… and um… please read my other Esca fics… and uh… I'll go work on my other stories now.

Ciao for now,

~Seeress