Title – Facets of a Dragon
Chapter – Two, Windows
Authoress – Phoenix Tears
Summary – Hermione finds something of Draco's, and finds out her windows need cleaning.
Rating – PG13
Warning – Slash, AU, language, rape
Disclaimer – I own nothing, except for this plot. Everything else belongs to J.K. Rowling.
Authoress' Note – I am a citizen of America, so pardon the spellings if they are not strictly United Kingdom type English… you know, with 'colour' or 'color'…
Feedback – Of course, as for every writer, questions, thoughts, and constructive criticism are all greatly appreciated. Thank you, and enjoy.
I think, all my life, I have been seeing things through a one-way glass window.
I think that, for all my intelligence and cleverness, I am blind to the world.
I'm a hypocrite as bad as the people I claim to hate, and I didn't know it.
When Professor McGonagall sent me a letter informing me that I was Head Girl, I was ecstatic. To be proclaimed Head Girl was such an honour for my parents, also. Mum beamed happily and cooked a wonderful dinner that night. Dad was so proud, clapping me on the back, saying, That's my girl, 'Mione!
When I found out Draco Malfoy was Head Boy, I was shocked. For him – the very epitome of evil and Dark itself! – to be proclaimed Head Boy was unbelievable. But I trusted Dumbledore in his decisions and agreed – albeit through gritted teeth – to work with Malfoy throughout the year.
When a few months had passed since the beginning of term, and I found myself actually enjoying working with Draco, I was confused. He was funny, witty, intelligent, and had a twisted sense of sarcasm. But he was also evil, malicious, and bullying, I reminded myself.
When I walked into Draco's room, looking for him so we could discuss one of the safety measures on the Forbidden Forest that a Ravenclaw prefect had suggested, I found a book on his bed. I wouldn't have read it under normal circumstances, but I wanted to find evidence that Draco was evil – I wanted to hate him again, because hating him was so much easier than being confused.
I duplicated the book and left his room.
I stayed up all night stripping the warding spells off of it and reading it.
His journal made me realize how much my window needed cleaning.
October 6, 1991
It's my eleventh birthday today, and Blaise and Pansy threw a wonderful party for me. I felt so happy – the parties weren't as elaborate as the ones Mother and Father hold, but the gifts were just as nice. Father sent me an Invisibility Cloak that one of his associates in Thailand had made – it's beautiful! I heard that Harry Potter has one, also.
I wonder how fun it might have been if we were friends – all of us, all the Gryffindors and Slytherins. I wonder how things might have been if we didn't have masks and façades.
I wonder how it might have been if they weren't so prejudiced.
I read a few entries, some mundane, some excited, some fuming, but all insightful. Draco wrote about once a month, I found, and had a very abstract, random way of putting out his thoughts – he jotted down whatever came to his mind in flowing, elegant script. His thoughts got more interesting as he got older.
February 26, 1994
It's strange, you know?
Hufflepuff is the house of loyalty, but I think Slytherins are more loyal than them. We have no one to turn to but ourselves in time of need and friendship, since all the other Houses shun us. We're the most loyal to each other – it's ironic that, in the end, we are the ones who end up being the supposed 'backstabbers'.
Ravenclaw is the house of intelligence, but I think Slytherins are smarter than them. We have base instinct and learned strategy; Ravenclaws do everything according to their books. If a Ravenclaw were placed in a viper's nest, they would transfigure a rock into rope, bind the rope into a ladder, and try to avoid being bitten by the snakes as they climb up the ladder. If a Slytherin were placed in a viper's next, they would just kill all the snakes.
Gryffindor is the house of bravery, but I think Slytherins have more courage and endurance than any Gryffindor. All of Hogwarts mocks us, but we can hold our heads up high like the aristocrats we are, and ignore them. It takes more strength, my father told me once, to fight your emotional battles, than it does to fight your physical ones. Their bravery is nothing compared to what we have to experience everyday.
It's really strange, you know.
When I saw the entry of April 1996, my eyes nearly popped out from shock.
April 17, 1996
I attended the Order today. Bloody phoenix woke me up at seven this morning – it's a fucking weekend! Father, Mother, and Sev were there, also, strangely. I never knew they were spies. They all seemed surprised to see me, but congratulated me on my decision. I saw Harry, Remus, Sirius, Bill, and Arabella, among others. Was given mission by Dumbledore with parents and Sev to watch V.'s actions more closely. Must go now; V. summoning. Hurts like hell. Blasted mark.
Draco had the Dark Mark? And he was a spy for the Order of the Phoenix?
And Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy were also spies?
And Draco was referring to Harry, Remus, Sirius, and others like they were friends?
I had to lie down for a while.
December 26, 1996
Was summoned last night, with Sev and Father. Tortured, raped, the usual by V. Sev and Father still fussed. Mother made me sleeping tonic. V. is a bloody fucking sadist, really. Just because he has no sex life doesn't mean he has to rape me on a continual basis. Blaise, Greg, and Vince worried. Pansy and Millicent fretting. Body still bleeding, scratched. Damn Malfoy genes for bruising easily.
Harry concerned. He came last night, said I wasn't here. Told him about summons, and heard a concerned lecture for the twelfth time. Or was it eleventh? Not sure if Rem lectured me also, everything a bit fuzzy. Could only do a bit of kissing, no sex last night. Hurt too much. Harry made me go to see Pomfrey. Sev brewed about twenty different kinds of healing potions for me to drink. Still fucking hurts to move, though.
I feel dirty and used inside. Oh, well. Received a very suggesting look from Harry at dinner tonight. Maybe will feel better by tomorrow.
I stayed up all night reading his journal, and I spent the whole week thinking about my windows.
I decided to talk to Draco.
After the talk, my window could not only see the sunshine coming through, but also the shadows.
Authoress' Note: 'Sunshine' is the pretty things in life that are easy to see and believe. The 'shadows' are the ugly but true things of life that you don't want to believe, but know are true. I know that Draco's journal entries may seem a bit flippant and nonchalant about his rape and how he feels, but remember – he is a Slytherin, and tends to use sarcasm and wit to ease his pain.
