OR DIE TRYING: THE STORY OF CHO CHANG

By monkeymouse

NB: JKRowling built the Potterverse; I'm just redecorating one of the rooms. And one of the great things about JKR telling the story from Harry's point of view is that stuff could be happening all over Hogwarts that Harry isn't aware of.

Rated: PG

Spoilers: Everything

xxx

55. Invitation to the Dance

A Ravenclaw can study under any conditions. The story is that, when the Dark forces of Grindelwald prepared to attack Hogwarts itself, one group of Ravenclaw students ignored the alarm and stayed in the Potions dungeon, trying to perfect an Ennervating Draught, only because the problem was so interesting.

So it was that most of the Ravenclaw students threw themselves back into their studies after the First Task, noting the Champions' performances and then moving on to their course work, viewing the Tournament the way they viewed the snow and cold that moved in at the beginning of December and settled in, locking the school in early winter as if in a Body Bind Hex.

Not every Ravenclaw, of course. Many of the students finished their assignments quickly and thoroughly, and found themselves with time on their hands. Their free hours were filled with activities ranging from the unusual (Second-Year Devi Ramaprasad building a scale model of Hogsmeade that was gradually taking over the floor of his dormitory) to the bizarre (Third Year Luna Lovegood, who some said was eccentric while others said was quite mad, had taken to climbing the library ladder in the Common Room only to hang upside down by her heels for hours at a time) to the downright dangerous (Giulio Grimaldi's attempts to perfect a Discorporation Potion, apparently for the sole purpose of walking through walls into the girls' dormitories).

Cho Chang had her own after-hours activity: flying. The cancellation of Quidditch for the year had hit her harder than even she realized, and she found that the only way to keep her mood even and her sanity intact was to go out once or twice a month after supper, get her Comet Two Sixty, and fly as fast as she could, in complicated patterns, around the walls of the castle, and even into the edges of the Forbidden Forest. It wasn't exactly Seeking, but she'd done very little night flying until this year, and she found it both thrilling and relaxing. The reduced visibility challenged her senses, forcing her to react to what she saw rather than what she thought she remembered. After an hour or so, with the edge taken off of her need to fly and her equilibrium restored, she could return to schoolwork-hers or others.

She was studying not just for her class exams, after all, but also for her Ordinary Wizarding Levels in the spring, so she was not only studying the full complement of courses for the year (Charms, Potions, Transfiguration, Divination, Muggle Studies) but also brushing up on courses she'd taken earlier.

But she didn't lock herself in the library or her dormitory to study. Like so many Ravenclaw, she would set up shop in the Common Room; and, like so many Ravenclaw (including Penny Clearwater who had been so helpful during Cho's early days), she was never too busy to help another student who asked for help in one topic or other. She became an unofficial Fifth-Year Girls Prefect; officially, that honour fell to Letitia Groondy, whose grades were as high as her sense of propriety was inflexible.

It wasn't until Cho awoke on the morning of 18 December, one week before the Yule Ball, that she started thinking seriously about it. No boy had yet asked her to go with him to the dance, and she was half expecting that nobody would, and half hoping that Harry Potter might.

As five of the six girls washed up and dressed to go down to breakfast on this, the last day of the term, they heard the murmuring stop from behind the drawn curtains on Raina al-Qaba's bed. She opened the curtains, slid fully dressed out of bed, and folded up the mat she knelt on for five-times- a-day prayers.

Jan Nugginbridge said what the other girls were thinking. "Yule Ball's comin' up. Who's got a date, then?"

Letitia raised her hand. "Pablo asked me just yesterday", she said, referring to Pablo Molina, also a Prefect. "Are you going, Raina?"

"Just to listen to the music," she replied. "I don't dance."

"There's still a week; you could learn easily."

A look came to Raina's eyes as if a moment she was afraid of had finally come. "No. I mean, I'm not allowed to dance."

"By your parents?"

"By my faith."

"What-they don't let you have fun?"

"That's not it. Islam teaches not to have so much fun that you forget about holy things. Listening to music is all right, but girls are never supposed to dance."

Letitia cocked her head to one side. "Have you ever thought of just giving that all up? I mean, what does it get you?"

"LETITIA!" Cho almost screamed. "That is incredibly rude! What would you say if someone told you to change the way you'd always done things, or the foods you'd always eaten?"

"Don't jump down my throat just because I think she'd be better off!"

"What SHE thinks about her life is all that's important."

"Stop it, please," Raina interrupted Cho. "I don't want to be the cause of a fight."

Letitia shrugged as Raina went down to the Common Room. The other girls soon joined her there, and they all went down to the Great Hall together. As they did, Raina took Cho's hand and squeezed it. Cho smiled at Raina and returned the squeeze.

xxx

The last day proceeded as normally as last days usually do with Christmas just around the corner. Some of the classes carried on as usual, or at least the professor expected them to, regardless of what the students were feeling. Some teachers were more receptive of high spirits than others; Madam Pomfrey, who taught Introduction to the Healing Arts, for one, made allowances and gave the Fifth-Year Ravenclaws the "assignment" of bandaging a spruce in the hospital wing. By the time class ended, the tree was decked with rolls of gauze bandage and thermometer icicles. Vincent Krixlow ruined the effect by levitating a bedpan to the top of the tree in place of a star, but it sent the class to lunch laughing.

During lunch, Cho only half-listened as the girls near her talked about who might invite them and who was still available. She glanced several times at Harry at the Gryffindor table, and once she thought she saw him glance at her, but lunch ended and he still hadn't made a move.

He was still at the Gryffindor table when Cho and her year left for their last two classes: History with Binns and Dark Arts with Moody. At the door of the History of Magic class, Cho heard a voice behind her. "Excuse me, Cho."

She turned; it was Cedric. Her grip on the door tightened. He wasn't one of her favourite people just at the moment.

"Yes?"

"Well, do you have a minute?"

She could ignore him and go into Binns' class. No; anything on earth was preferable to Binns' class. "Just a minute, then," she said, a bit impatiently. The other girls chuckled as they watched the two Seekers move a few steps down the corridor. Cho glared at them and they ducked into the classroom, chuckling even louder.

Cedric didn't waste time; "I get the feeling you're mad at me."

"And you can't imagine why?" she asked huffily. "Don't you ever think about what's been going on?"

"Well, what HAS been going on?"

Cho couldn't believe it; maybe he really was as thick as Roger Davies had painted him. "It's just that I always thought you were a decent person, and you just let it go on!"

"Let what go on?"

"The badges!" Cho barely had her temper under control. "I can't believe you haven't tried to do a single thing about those awful badges!"

"W-Wait a minute!" Cedric sputtered, turning red with embarrassment. "You blame me for those?"

"I blame you for not doing anything about them!"

"But I did! As soon as I saw what they said about Potter I went right to Snape himself. I complained to him directly as Head of Slytherin House. It was like I wasn't even there. He said I was too thin-skinned to make allowances for what he called the 'high spirits' of some of the Slytherins. Made it all sound like a joke, and there was nothing I could do about it in any case. Look, I'm sorry if they offend you; they offend me too! And it made me feel even worse just because people like you thought I had a hand in them or something. You didn't really think that, did you?"

Somehow, Cedric had not only deflected her argument but turned it back on Cho. She actually grew flustered as she tried to answer: "Well, I suppose not, but I thought you were just letting it go on."

"Believe me, I would have stopped it if I could. Potter's a good kid; I wouldn't insult him like that-not after that First Task, certainly. Anyway, I haven't been seeing so many of those things, so I guess the joke's wearing off. Still, I'm sorry if you were offended."

"Don't be; sorry, I mean," Cho replied, still nervous for a reason she couldn't explain. "You didn't try to offend me. I'm the one who should be sorry, accusing you like that."

"Don't mention it," Cedric smiled down at her. At this moment, Cho was very conscious of the fact that her head barely reached his shoulder. "But I would like to make it up to you."

"How?"

"Let me take you to the Yule Ball."

No; this wasn't how it was supposed to be. Where was Harry? Harry should be asking. Instead, here she was, with Cedric Diggory looming over her- Cedric Diggory, who all the Hogwarts girls, it seemed, wanted to chat up, or worse. But Cho had never shown him the least interest in that way; he was a friend and a fellow Seeker and that's all. She tried to tell him so, but all she could do when she looked into his face was to observe how his eyes were such a singular shade of gray.

"Nobody's asked you already, have they?"

Cho tried to speak again, but could only shake her head.

"I'd be honoured."

Again Cho tried to speak; again, she could only nod her head.

"You will?" Cedric beamed as if he never in a million years thought that she'd say yes. "That's super! Well, I'll let you get to class now. We can talk later. Thanks!" And he dashed down the hall, leaving Cho Chang to wonder what she had just done, and why she had just done it, and if perhaps Cedric Diggory was some sort of male veela.

xxx

Cho slipped into the classroom, and slipped into a seat next to Jan, who whispered to her, and she whispered back, as Professor Binns droned on:

"In the year 1476, on the Isle of Skye, Rippselmick the Ravenous levied the first known tax on wands . . ."

"HE DID WOT?!"

Binns looked at the back of the room. Jan Nugginbridge had suddenly buried her face in her arms on the table; Cho Chang was making a point at looking somewhere other than the front of the room. "If you're having trouble with your hearing, Miss Nugginbridge, kindly go to the hospital wing. If not, allow me to continue."

He went back to droning on about Rippselmick while Jan whispered to Cho: "Pull the other one!"

"He did. He asked and, and, I said yes."

"Didn't think yeh fancied him."

"This isn't about fancying anyone. I can't tell you the rest now."

But the news had made the rounds of the room and, as soon as the bell sounded and they left the classroom, all of the other girls descended on Cho, clamoring for details.

"Look, it's not such a big deal," she told them a bit impatiently. "He asked, I agreed."

"But what did you say, exactly?" Libby Foggly asked.

Cho didn't want to tell them that she didn't say anything; that she just stood there like a fool. She didn't have to tell them anything just yet, as Roger Davies caught up with them just outside of the Dark Arts dungeon.

"Afternoon, ladies," he said jauntily. "Might I borrow the Seeker for a second?"

The other girls started giggling; they thought they knew what was about to happen. Cho thought so, too, only she didn't think it was funny.

"Cho, I know we started the year off on the wrong end of the broom," he started, sounding as if he'd rehearsed this speech, "and I'm really glad we're still friends. Well, one friend to another, will you let me take you to the Yule Ball?"

The words were barely out of his mouth when the group of Ravenclaw girls started chuckling.

"Friend to friend, Roger, I wish I could say yes, but I've already been asked."

Roger didn't seem to have considered this possibility. He looked first stunned, then a little angry as he said, "By whom, then? No, no; don't tell me. Right now I just might hunt him down and do him a mischief. Excuse me."

He turned his back on Cho; the other girls got out of his path just in time as he stormed back up toward the castle.

"Is that what they call letting him down easy?" Vincent Krixlow started. He stopped when Cho turned to him, with a look more sorrowful than angry. Even he realized that he shouldn't say anything. They all silently went into Professor Moody's class.

xxx

By the time class was over, they were once again noisy and in high spirits. "Free at last!" shouted Giulio Grimaldi down the corridor, which was swiftly filling with other students. The holiday had officially begun.

"Yeah," Vincent said, "all we have to worry about now is the Yule Balls."

"Can you spare the rest of us a boy out of your stable, Cho?" Diana Fairweather joked.

"It's not a stable!" Cho stamped her foot. "Honestly! Just because two boys ask me on the same day . . ."

"Er, Cho? Could I have a word with you?"

It was a voice that Cho had heard maybe a handful of times in her life, but she knew it as completely as she knew her own. She didn't have to turn to face the speaker to know it was Harry. The laughter of the other girls merely confirmed the fact.

"Okay."

Harry walked a little down the corridor, and she followed him. She tried to keep a calm face, but her stomach was lurching like the time she fell through the missing step.

Harry seemed to be struggling for the words he wanted to say; Cho simply stood, watching and waiting. Finally he managed something that sounded like, "Whango ball wimmie."

"Sorry," Cho said politely, as if she didn't know what he had said, but she was sure that she knew what he had said.

"D'you-D'you want to go to the ball with me?" Harry managed to get out, blushing crimson as he spoke.

"Oh." Watching Harry turn red made Cho turn just as red. "Oh, Harry, I'm really sorry. I've already said I'll go with someone else."

"Oh." He seemed frozen, like a statue, and it took a few seconds before he came alive again. "Oh okay; no problem."

No you're not okay! Cho wanted to shout. I can see it! We all can see it! Why don't you say it!! But all she could do was repeat, "I'm really sorry."

"That's okay."

No it isn't, but you're so sweet to say so, thought Cho. I wish I'd told Cedric no; I wish I had your courage.

She and Harry just looked at each other for another minute. Cho finally decided to say, "Well."

"Yeah."

She felt that her face was just getting redder and redder. "Well, bye." She turned and walked away. I made it, she thought, I made it. I got away without Harry asking. . .

"Who're you going with?"

Cho froze in her tracks as if she'd been hit with an Imperius Curse. She turned, as casually as she could and said, "Oh. Cedric; Cedric Diggory."

All Harry said was, "Oh. Right." He walked away, but Cho could tell this news hurt Harry far more than her rejection did.

The other Ravenclaw girls crowded around Cho. "Guess we'll have teh call yeh 'Feast er Famine' Chang!" Jan laughed.

Cho did not think any of this was a laughing matter.

Harry, Harry, she thought toward the swiftly fleeing back of Harry Potter. Why didn't you say something at lunch? Why didn't you say something?

xxx

to be continued in part 56, wherein the Yule Ball begins on a very sour note for Cho Chang

A/N: Book 5 is finally out, and I've heard from some folks that I should continue this fic into the new book. For the moment, let the record show that the book bears out the premise of this fic: that Cho was as interested in Harry as he was in her.

Also, "Rippselmick" is an in-joke that hardly anyone else will get. It's based on RPSLMC, the initials of the place where I work: Rush-Presbyterian- St. Luke's Medical Center in Chicago.